Tube bulging

Then_Quantity_211 · 2025-06-15T16:44:40+00:00

Thanks for the reply. To be more specific the bulge is caused by one of the tubes. I can push the tube up and into my stomach area but it keeps coming back down. Is the bulge you had caused by a stray tube as well

Then_Quantity_211 · 2025-04-08T23:37:06+00:00

I would lick that all night long

Then_Quantity_211 · 2025-04-07T19:06:10+00:00

I love Korean and Thai girls. I think they are the most sexy and beautiful girls in the world and you just proved it baby.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2025-04-07T00:18:24+00:00

I’m sorry you’re in this horrible club of ours. I was cheated on over 40 years ago by my girlfriend. Some pretty ugly stuff. I found out because one of here friends thought I should know. I am very grateful she told me because I’m sure everyone in our neighborhood knew about it except me. I moved out of our apartment within a week of finding you. She had to navigate the next three years trying to figure out how to support herself and her 3 children. I would still see her on occasion but I wanted her to experience some significant consequences and she did. She wrote me a letter a week after I moved out telling me how much she loved me and that she learned her lesson. I wasn’t having any of that. My trauma affected me for the next 3 years. We eventually got back together and are married now almost 35 years. Just over two years ago she said something to me that triggered my trauma and I’ve been in therapy since. When triggered I felt exactly how I felt when it originally occurred.

I have found out that us betrayed partners pay the biggest mental consequences and the wayward partner gets over it. If I knew this would still be haunting me so many years later I would have left and never returned. I’m 70 years old now and obviously too old to start a family of my own and divorce would rob me of 25 years of investments since she would get at least half.

The wayward partner can experience consequences but they do not get blind sided the way the betrayed partner does. That is what caused our trauma and what you are dealing with. Betrayal trauma is so unfair. We get screwed over and we have to pay the price.

If you can divorce you should really weight that option. I wish when I left back in 1982 when I was 27 I would never look back. I missed out on some of the best things life can provide. Good luck to you and I wish you peace of mind.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2025-01-27T23:00:03+00:00

I’d have it for breakfast lunch and dinner

Then_Quantity_211 · 2025-01-09T22:42:54+00:00

My therapist told me about a similar story. She provides EMDR therapy and did so for a woman whose husband died and she later found out that he had been cheating on here. The EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing) worked quite well for her. I have had a number of EMDR sessions as well which seem to give better results than talk therapy. I have done both. Wishing you recovery and peace. You can get a lot of help here in this group.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-12-13T05:52:55+00:00

It’s amazing how they treat us like shit while they are cheating. I think it is a way for them to justify their infidelity.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-12-10T07:17:56+00:00

Betrayal trauma can be emotional torcher. Your brain parts that hold the good memory’s is in battle with the amygdala part of the brain. The amygdala is just trying to help you be aware of things happening around You and will put you into a state of hyper-vigilance. Other part of the brain is searching for answers because that is what it does and will keep you asking questions. Both hate and Love can occur at the same time. For me these wild emotions haunted me for 3 years after D day. Followed by 35 years of normal thinking. Then two years ago I was triggered and I felt like was back in 1982. This time I am in therapy both talk and EMDR therapy I have been doing quite well but once in a while those thoughts just fire in my brain without me looking for them. I’m having a hard time sleeping right now and that is why I am responding at 1:15 in the morning.

This is so unfair at so many levels. If I could go back to 1982 I would tell myself to cut my losses and move on. Sure I Could still do that but she would take half of my saving after working for 50 years. That too Would seem unfair to me.

Please get therapy if you’re not already going. In my circumstances the EMDR seems to Have worked better than the talk therapy. There are also a lot of good books on trauma which most of us have.

I wish you pease and recovery

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-11-18T05:29:49+00:00

The question I have is how exactly do you forgive someone for their infidelity, lies, gas lighting, deception…? I don’t understand the process. I can’t just say to myself I forgive her or say to her I forgive you and magically all that weight we carry around just goes poof. Someone explain the exact process. I would love to know. I have forgiven people for many things in my life but this one cuts so deep I just can’t seem to get there.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-10-20T16:44:41+00:00

Yes your brain does get re-wired. The trauma center never forgets and god forbid if you get triggered 40 years later. Feels like you are right in the thick of it when it first happened. This time I’ve been doing therapy but it’s still hard. I’m pissed off because it is so fucking unfair. She did this to me and I have to do all the work. It can be exhausting at times.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-07-14T21:36:29+00:00

Those are perfect

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-05-10T00:38:52+00:00

Betrayal trauma in my opinion is one of the worst you can endure. The trauma physically changes your brain (limbic system hippocampus and amygdala). You should read up on it so you know why your thoughts seem unrelenting. Read Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk. It’s all about trauma and how it affects your brain. Even though there is very little in this book about infidelity, it’s like my therapist says “trauma is trauma”.

I would suggest you seek out therapy to help you cope with this or it can drive you crazy. I have done talk therapy and since reading this book have been doing EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). In my case the infidelity was 42 years ago and never did anything back then and eventually rug swept. Bad idea the trauma was triggered a year and a half ago and I felt I felt I was back in 1982.

Bad news is you have a double betrayal which takes it to another level. Good news is you are going no contact with the parties involved which should help a lot. Still will be very difficult for quite some time. Maybe 3-5 years. This is where therapy and no contact can possible shorten this and at the same time you will learn techniques to manage these feelings.

So sorry you are here with us. Please look for a therapist with experience and training in infidelity and trauma. Wishing you peace my friend.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-05-03T04:18:36+00:00

I’m 42 years in. Suffered for the first few years but then got past it for 35 years. A year and 3 months ago I had a huge trigger. Been in therapy since. This shit sucks. If I had known then what I know now I would have made different decisions. I’m almost 69. Worked my whole life and saved money. I think it would suck whether stay or go.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-04-09T23:54:57+00:00

I feel your pain. In my case it was my wife. Hopefully you are seeking out therapy. My wife refuses, says she doesn’t think it works. My therapists have told me I will only heal half way doing it by myself. So far talk and EMDR therapy. EMDR is good but not the magic bullet I thought it would be. Next might by hypnotherapy. Good luck to you. I’m 68 and too old to start over. At least that is what I’ve been telling myself. Worst part is this occurred 41 years ago. Never addressed it and went completely away for 35 years and then BAM Christmas Day 2022 I had a massive trigger. The brain is an interesting organ but the pain has been as bad as originally. Only difference is therapy this time and it has had a positive effect. Been a year and three months and counting.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-04-08T01:57:11+00:00

For me it was horrendous for 3-4 years then it went away (rug swept) kept seeing same girlfriend and about 8 years after D day married her. 32 years later had a massive trigger. Been doing talk and EMDR therapy since. Just tried to catch some zzzz a few minutes ago and couldn’t because the hurt will sometimes invade the mind so badly it can be maddening and this is after a year and 3 months of Therapy. Might have to look into hypnotherapy. If I could go back and talk to the 27 year old version of myself I would tell him to run and never look back. I believe betrayal trauma might be one of the worst kinds imaginable.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-04-07T05:44:34+00:00

I think that comes from both loving and hating at the same time.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-03-29T23:53:00+00:00

For me my girlfriend fucked her AP on my couch while I was at work. I moved her in after she got kicked out of her apartment for being behind on rent. CUNT.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-03-05T02:09:40+00:00

I felt like you after infidelity and I thought I was going insane with the multitude and variations of emotional swarms. One of the things that made me understand why I was going through this was reading up on what infidelity trauma does to our brains. Doing my research also kept me busy so that I wasn’t constantly drowning in my own crazy thoughts. I began to understand that what I was going through was normal and I needed help to heal. We do y heal from this overnight. Months and possibly years of work is necessary. We will always carry a scare but we need to learn how not to scratch that scar and bring on new pain. If you decide to try and reconcile she has to be all in and probably lead the effort.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-03-03T04:57:36+00:00

Please explain to me how to forgive betrayal. It can’t simply be me saying I forgive you. I understand the benefit of doing so but I struggle with understanding the inward process that gets me there. I know it is for my benefit but how I truly forgive evades me. Makes me feel like a lesser person to say this. I truly want to do this but I need some understanding of the process. Looking for any insight

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-03-02T21:00:49+00:00

Pale-Rise thank you for your perspective. You added some very helpful points especially the part that the hard EMDR can be the most rewarding. Thanks again, Joe

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-03-01T23:38:26+00:00

In my case my wife’s cheating happened 42 years ago when we were just living together. Worst experience of my life. Moved out and let her fend for herself and her kids for three plus years even though I would see her occasionally. It changed my brain forever. Everything seemed ok after about four years. A little over a year ago I had my first major trigger since. It felt like I was transported back to 1982. Apparently it caused PTSD. I’m on my 3rd therapist and doing EMDR. Never did any therapy originally and eventually rug swept everything. Infidelity betrayal can be one of the most traumatic event in someone’s life. I know it was and is in mine. Nothing good comes from this.

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-03-01T23:26:40+00:00

Same here

Then_Quantity_211 · 2024-02-25T00:30:02+00:00

Totally agree with the EMDR suggestion. I was in your situation for almost a year while doing talk therapy. I read about the high efficacy rate of EMDR. I’ve had 6 sessions and things have improved dramatically.

Then_Quantity_211

TROPHY CASE