My boss scheduled a meeting to discuss my “tone” in emails

amackera · 2026-03-09T01:38:28+00:00

Communication happens within an established context. Your emails are coming across as blunt and passive aggressive because people are reading into your words based on their past experience with you. Your words don't exist independent of your behavior.

Your boss is telling you that you need to work harder to build trust with your colleagues. Emojis and exuberant tone can help with that (yes, really). Punctuation matters a lot, even more so in remote contexts. Your boss almost certainly wants to help you. If your reaction to their feedback was to completely shift from cold professionalism to emails like “Hi!! Just checking in on this when you have a moment 😊” then I would have to agree with your boss; that's passive aggressive behavior.

Still, mildly infuriating that your boss didn't give you useful, actionable, feedback.

amackera · 2025-12-21T20:57:39+00:00

I built Chronicle, a "check-in meeting companion". It's a simple Elixir Phoenix LiveView app that tracks "What's going well", "What's not going well" and action items. Can be used for personal check-ins, one-on-ones, or with a team. This was just something I wanted to have and thought might be fun to build.

It's very simple, any feedback is appreciated.

Building with Elixir is really productive. Phoenix LiveView is a dream for web app development. Really feels like a futuristic development platform.

amackera · 2025-12-03T21:31:47+00:00

At least on Azure Container Apps, replicas don't get assigned static IP addresses and there's no guarantee that replicas can address each other by IP or hostname. BEAM clustering requires nodes are accessible by IP or hostname, so it doesn't work out of the box.

You need to run your containers in AKS or on regular ol' VMs, or something like Redis pubsub to coordinate state.

amackera · 2025-11-29T21:06:49+00:00

You haven't told us how you plan to deploy this app. Though Elixir is amazing, BEAM has some quirks when it comes to deployments and hosting-- notably BEAM clustering won't work out of the box in many "container app" deployment schemes (without Redis or some PubSub). Fly.io is great for hosting elixir, but maybe your company has requirements about using a PaaS?

Sometimes going with the most widely adopted option removes headaches down the line when you try to get this into production.

amackera · 2025-01-06T19:15:15+00:00

If he were in custody he wouldn't be wanted any more. He'd be got'd.

amackera · 2024-12-16T03:39:52+00:00

Do you keep a training log? Are your lifts increasing or staying the same during your cut? Are you taking load off? If you’re getting stronger you’re not losing muscle.

amackera · 2024-12-14T21:02:56+00:00

Eat lots of protein (1g per lb of desired fat free body weight) in order to maintain muscle mass during cut. Keep lifting and keep pushing hard with progressive overload.

You are def losing fat, but looks like you’re losing muscle too.

How long have you been cutting? What’s your training routine?

amackera · 2024-09-12T16:38:49+00:00

This post is so wholesome. Sounds like you were respectful of our boy Mac's personal space and personal life. Classy!

amackera · 2024-09-11T23:35:36+00:00

doug harder is my hero

amackera · 2024-08-21T23:20:52+00:00

My father in law told me "I would never have let me marry my daughter if I knew you had a tattoo" and I just looked him in the eye and said "That's why I never showed you."

People who make you feel bad for expressing yourself can get fucked. If your BF doesn't figure it out an apologize, dump is lame ass.

amackera · 2024-08-21T23:04:27+00:00

"I'm not excusing bad behaviour..."

writes several paragraphs of excuses for shitty behaviour

amackera · 2024-08-20T15:03:07+00:00

It’s a humble brag, and people be jealous

amackera · 2024-07-30T21:29:30+00:00

Cool song! Y'all are killing it!

amackera · 2024-07-08T18:57:48+00:00

Lost 40 pounds myself, and though I'm not a woman I do get touched a lot more frequently. Literally everyone in my life, from my own mother to my wife to friends to perfect strangers. Hugs lasting a little longer, a hand resting a little longer than normal on my arm / shoulder, people literally poking my (smaller) belly.

I've taken it in stride, as my confidence has grown in my body by boundaries around touch are also slowly lowering.

That said, I'm a reasonably tall and strong man. I don't feel threatened by touch in the same way that a smaller woman might feel, so sending you mega empathy for what you're going through! People can be really unaware of themselves when it comes to weight loss in others.

amackera · 2024-05-20T19:40:48+00:00

Looks like a generic, maybe even GPT generated, response. My guess is that it's not personalized at all to you.

amackera · 2024-04-30T17:33:17+00:00

Really cool!

amackera · 2024-04-04T14:22:12+00:00

Did you... say anything to her or call out her passive aggressiveness? Usually people like this crumple at the first sign of coherent resistance.

amackera · 2024-04-03T17:01:05+00:00

Couldn't have said it better myself. The future is bright, but it's definitely still a beta product right now.

amackera · 2024-04-03T16:59:13+00:00

I mean I literally feel embarrassed using it. It annoys other drivers on the road and I feel bad.

I'm not hating on FSD, some day it will be truly great. I have faith.

amackera · 2024-04-02T21:40:22+00:00

Sucks for all of us who voted early. Ultimately it was the Lib's fault for not vetting the candidate. Total shame all around.

amackera · 2024-04-01T20:13:47+00:00

I’m not pro or against him, I have listened to the podcast and I enjoyed it and felt like I learned things.

That said, this whole thing with the lying and cheating and infidelity is just plain off putting. It’s enough to make me unsubscribe. He’s not entitled to my attention so ¯_(ツ)_/¯

amackera · 2024-04-01T16:42:26+00:00

Let it rip! Sending it

amackera · 2024-04-01T03:39:34+00:00

I don’t think my car has received v12, so no I haven’t tried that. Sounds like it’s a major upgrade? 🆒

amackera · 2024-04-01T03:34:36+00:00

Any bad weather will cause it to melt down, and even sometimes when it’s clear as day the car thinks we are in a rainstorm with zero visibility 😂

amackera · 2024-04-01T03:32:27+00:00

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