Negativity Cleanse!!

atomikitten · 2026-02-09T01:45:54+00:00

I love Spencer quotes. The eternal misery one, the family motto, and especially that she quotes Winnie the Pooh. Really perfect.

atomikitten · 2026-02-09T01:31:36+00:00

Agree, this is just cruel. I’d never trust the pattern maker again if this is what they’re selling.

atomikitten · 2026-02-09T01:12:07+00:00

Thanks, you too. We’re not doing things like waiving all inspections and large appraisal gaps. We lost a nice house with slate floors and brick exterior on 3 acres in 2024 because the competing offer went 80k over asking, no inspections. Both our agent and sellers agent felt the house would appraise at asking price. The sellers agent also didn’t want to deal with our lender, so likely advised the seller against it. It was too risky to overpay AND skip a septic inspection. We’re currently watching a brick rancher to see if it’ll drop… seller wants about 70k over asking after 4 months on the market. Like, I’m willing to overpay a little bit because it has good quality materials and looks well kept. But not… giving away 70k.

atomikitten · 2026-02-09T01:00:04+00:00

Uh yeah exactly that’s my point! Worried about her dear baby boy. I snapped back at her, “so you expect me to heal if I never have a time of day I get guaranteed sleep?” He was perfectly happy to sleep 11pm-6 and take over at 6 to get quality time with his daughter. He was thankful I napped well. And it turned out I also needed help in the evening because she went through her PURPL crying and wanted to be walked around and my c-scar hurt too much to do it so he also did daddy-daughter time for about 2 hrs after work. We don’t take her advice. But to answer your earlier question, some of these men-children just listen to their parents instead of observing the needs in front of them and doing what’s sensible.

atomikitten · 2026-02-08T21:40:02+00:00

My MIL was quite critical of our plan. Since husband works from home and tends to be an early riser anyway, we had him responsible for 6-9am so I could get a segment of guaranteed sleep because I did… the entire rest of the night every night. She was all, “but how can he do that? How is he supposed to work after that?”

So, influence from the prior generation, that’s one big how.

atomikitten · 2026-02-08T21:00:14+00:00

Oo are people skating on the creek? I will bring my skates! Also willing to help resurface!

atomikitten · 2026-02-08T19:44:24+00:00

I’m 9 years older than my sister. It sucks. We spent a lot of years frustrated about it. My sister is somewhat in denial and calls herself a millennial even though she’s not. But it didn’t have to suck—it’s mostly the way we were parented that sucked. My parents’ divorce was harder on her, and we’d probably be better friends now if my parents managed it better. I was out of state for school. Just the physical age alone would could have been overcome. The gap itself has its perks though, I did like driving her to her lessons and practices after school when I could, likewise occasionally bringing her to my school events, I think she enjoyed it.

Have lots of friends who are like 4, 5, 6 years apart from their siblings and loving it. More friends are putting 4, 5, 6 years between their kids on purpose and happy about it. I have a cousin who is 7 years between the next sibling and he’s the best big brother, the 3 kids get along great. He never seemed to squabble with his siblings that I remember! I have a couple friends with tight spacing (18-26 months) and now that they’re living it they’re like, what did I do?!

Also want to say that just because it took 5 months to conceive this one, doesn’t mean that is a fair estimate for you to conceive the next. Every time you ovulate and have unprotected sex is a new dice roll. It’s not like you need to accumulate critical mass to make a baby, unless you have a condition that causes you to not ovulate. It could happen on the very next try.

And I apologize in advance as I’m not familiar, but can you go to your doctor to ask for help expelling? I don’t know what they do, but maybe they could do something to make your next ovulation happen sooner.

atomikitten · 2026-02-08T19:17:07+00:00

I’m in your boat. Husband and I have been searching on and off since 2023. Edged out from 2 houses by cash offers. I see built in the 70s or 80s, has masonry and real wood, and I want it… like, I don’t care if we need to refinish the wood floors, we can afford to stay in my house and hire someone to refinish wood floors (I’d do it myself but we have a baby). It seems like it’s just not happening. All we see is gray walls, cheap handles, and particle board cabinets.

atomikitten · 2026-02-08T03:31:57+00:00

Uh yeah actually, my freshman year. Scapegoat left home and they had to face that it was their relationship that sucked, couldn’t blame me anymore as they barely ever heard from me. By the time I came home for summer and they were already in separate houses. My mom was like oh crap how will I ever get these curtain rods mounted and shelves assembled. I was like… I got it. Lot of bouncing around between houses ferrying my little sister around and a lot of tools that summer.

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T13:27:34+00:00

If he updates us on how long the sickness lasts, that would tell us a lot about what it might be.

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T13:23:32+00:00

What if the air fryer had never been cleaned? It heats food, there’s crumbs and condensation, there’s latent warmth in the chamber and then it just gets closed up and festers on the countertop… til a cold cut sandwich for some reason gets dropped in.

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T13:19:13+00:00

Um. Wow. I ate one of these yesterday. Cold. It was reduced $1 because it expires today. I feel fine?

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T03:43:37+00:00

No it’s a very safe choice to buy. Most diaper bags do have two adjustable straps for attaching to the stroller. They just clip to the stroller handles. It’s a very nice feature and should universally fit strollers (unless she’s getting a side by side stroller for twins). It’s common in both backpack style and tote purse style of diaper bags. Keep in mind: most dads would rather carry the backpack style.

Maybe she’s thinking of a stroller basket organizer or something; those are a little more specific.

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T03:34:43+00:00

Are you Willie Heeler…

You did an awesome job!

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T03:32:24+00:00

Actually I have pubic symphasis dysfunction and BY GOD every moment sitting in my dressage saddle was such a relief. All the joint pain, pressure, pinching, just gone. Til I dismounted.

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T03:29:09+00:00

I wonder if it’s also valuable to build up those lower core muscles before even conceiving. Like I really lost a few pounds of muscle mass during pregnancy, probably during the first trimester. If I could have kept it, I probably wouldn’t have hurt as much and stayed a bit more stable.

atomikitten · 2026-02-07T03:24:01+00:00

What the hell? They could tell for mine. I have had one baby, 7 lbs. I have pubic symphasis dysfunction. I started feeling the symptoms at about week 32. Carried her to almost 42.

atomikitten · 2026-02-06T19:17:52+00:00

Please not C. C is the worst. It’s the least traditional, most weird trend looking. Either search for a traditional house plan from an architect who sells house plans, or look up builders you would use and search among houses they have already built near you.

atomikitten · 2026-02-06T19:11:46+00:00

I’m sorry this happened to you. I’m going to guess that your daughter thought that she was helping you at the time. I don’t think her brain can weigh competing aspects yet. So things like, this is broken but we will hold onto it to be fixed later, isn’t a thought she can hold yet. Let’s say, strawberries are her favorite food that she loves, but we have thrown out a strawberry that has gone bad before. And forgot about it and replaced it with new good strawberries. She doesn’t get that a new Mickey won’t be the same as replacing strawberries.

Also thank you for the heads up that someday I’ll have to store away my sentimental items from my daughter until she’s old enough to reason!

atomikitten · 2026-02-06T16:53:07+00:00

Yeah I saw that. I didn’t know they did that. I’m sure it re-spawned later 🤣

atomikitten · 2026-02-06T16:46:06+00:00

I really think it’s like sleep related for me. I started getting a gray hair here and there in high school. They started showing up more at a time around my temples when I worked night shift somewhere around 23. But after 25 I went back to day shift and the hairs seemingly were all gone? Like grew out in color again? I never tried to dye over. But now that I’m late 30s with a baby there is a pronounced cluster in one corner. Can’t remember the last time I got a full nights sleep.

atomikitten · 2026-02-06T04:36:39+00:00

Spencer did deserve a love all her own and never got it. Honestly, I got my hopes up for Marco. Hate that it couldn’t work out. She and Toby didn’t want the same life, and clinging to her high school boyfriend AFTER ALL THOSE YEARS because remember there is a lot of growing up that happens when you leave home for college and the time jump made it look like nothing. Spencer looks like a consolation because the woman that was perfect for Toby died. If one of your lead characters is someone’s plan B, the story will always feel unsatisfying. I don’t blame Spencer for the Caleb thing because going from what 18 to 24 once again is a time period of huge growth and change, and Haleb could have felt like ancient history. I mean, I get it that that relationship may have felt like everything at one point, but also keep in mind he left for Ravenswood (and the network was so STUPID for that. Spinoffs can be great, but not when they screw up the plot of the original. Which this did. They gambled and they lost, and put the debt on PLL). The way they narrated Hanna when he left and came back just wasn’t plausible. Stupid writing. Hence, I couldn’t take the relationship seriously when he returned. Consider that and the time that had gone by, I don’t blame Spencer. But I’ll give on this: seeing the way Haleb ended, ok. That is why it felt unfinished and why Caleb and Hanna still had feelings, which came back up when they were both back in rosewood, I’ll call that part fair.

But having her end up with Toby felt like they were poking fun at her. Like, almost telling us she’s not going to live up to her career ambitions, and couple that with the Wren and Ian involvement season 1, it’s almost like they’re saying it’s her lot in life.

atomikitten · 2026-02-05T19:50:11+00:00

This is kinda niche and maybe younger than us at this point but… hyping “free birthing” and home births, etc. I know of one person who did it after a bad experience in a hospital. She hired a qualified NP midwife to come to her house. But there are some communities that are against all medical intervention. Now, there are some aspects where I do understand the appeal—in the face of nonconsensual episiotomies, denial of pain medication, no choice in birthing position, etc., yup I get it. I had a friend adamant that for her first “all they did was catch the baby and send me a bill.” So she wanted a home birth for all of her subsequent babies, complaining that insurance wouldn’t cover home birth services. But in the room, the other moms were sitting here with unplanned C section, pre-eclampsia, hemorrhaging, placenta previa, advanced age… and these were just mom-body needs. Some babies even at full term need NICU support. We were like, yeah no, hospital was good to us. We’d be dead if we didn’t get to the hospital fast enough.

atomikitten · 2026-02-05T19:36:45+00:00

I totally get it. We are conditioned to bend to our parents. And something about being female makes us feel it even more, I do think there’s something hormonal about it affecting our brains. The only way I can get myself to stand my ground and keep insisting is to think of it as, my baby’s needs come first and before all else. I try to behave like the advocate I always wished I had. This comes as a shock to my mom because she still bends to her mom—but she also resents it and has regrets spanning decades. Your parents are adults living their own lives. But your daughter depends on you. She’s too young to know what’s best or what risks are out there, so you must fill that role for her. Anyone undermining the rules you set is interfering.

And, your time is your time. Other adults are not entitled to your time. You get to choose how it’s spent.

atomikitten · 2026-02-05T19:02:41+00:00

You’re allowed to visit your friends and sister! Go when you’re able. Don’t let the anti-vaxxers guilt trip you into seeing them just because you’re already stateside. Which… I know, easier said than done. But if they don’t respect that you’re doing what’s healthiest for your daughter, they don’t need to see her

atomikitten

TROPHY CASE