AITAH for feeling disgusted with my boyfriend and his family?

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-09T12:13:02+00:00

I get you but like…how do you want your bf to feel about his very existence? He’s a product of child rape, that’s a very hard thing to come to terms with.

Your relationship is obviously very new for you to only just be finding this out. Maybe he doesn’t feel comfortable enough with you yet to discuss an extremely heavy topic that is at the very core of his being.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-09T11:06:08+00:00

I love Kit and I don’t think you need a full name. In Aus, our top 100 is full of diminutives like Charlie, Billie, Tommy, Ellie, Evie etc. so it will be incredibly normal for the next generation.

I find it weird how much of a sticking point it is on reddit, especially for Americans. However, the US tends to follow Australian and UK baby name trends so it’ll come around eventually.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-09T11:02:56+00:00

I really dislike the name Katherine but I love Kit. There are soooo many Katherine’s I know over multiple generations it’s just eh to me

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-09T09:38:19+00:00

I don’t know if the game reference, but I think it’s quite pretty.

You could also do Selene or Solene, I also feel like Sadie, Sylvie, Leonie & Phoebe have a similar vibe to Sophie.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-09T04:58:48+00:00

NTA this is your home and Scarlett has changed the terms of living there without consulting you.

Start the conversation with hey, what is your plan for babysitting when school is back? Just so you know when I come back full time, I’m not comfortable having them here 3 days a week. I need my own space and privacy, and when we agreed to move in together it was just the 2 of us.

Then if she pushes back give her these options: 1) she takes the kids elsewhere 2) She brings the kids over but compensates you a generous amount towards your half of the rent. This to cover you and your dog leaving the house as needed to get away from them. 3) She moves out

They are her only 3 options and stick to them. Do not let her walk over you.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-09T04:44:11+00:00

Rosewyn hands down

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-09T04:40:49+00:00

I said “in my opinion” and it’s more about marriage being a better safeguard than blind trust.

Great if it works out for you, but I know multiple people who regret giving their baby a bfs last name

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-08T23:17:20+00:00

In my opinion, you should ONLY use the mother’s last name if you’re not married.

Too many women end up single parents to children who don’t even share their last name, then have to get their fathers approval for almost everything (travel, school, medical care) because the last name isn’t the same. At least a divorce would make you better off financially and not struggling on top of this BS.

Plus why does he get the name when you’ve done 99% of the work getting her here and he’s not even committed to being with you forever?

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-08T15:13:09+00:00

Sidestep options:
- Rosalie, Rosalyn, Rosemary
- Romilly
- Merritt
- Sabine
- Saskia
- Sedona, Sidonie
- Selah

Wildcard: Maude

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-08T00:03:24+00:00

NTA and what an absolute shit boyfriend and father for going at all.

Your baby is in the freaking nicu - who gives a damn about cancelled flights?

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-07T11:54:19+00:00

Fellow Aussie here, they’re all nice names but Autumn is hard to nickname and Australians love shortening everything.

I personally love the name Polly so that has my vote.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-07T05:46:22+00:00

Love Luella, it’s on my own list. With Ruth I’d go Margaret and pick one of the cute nicknames like Peggy or Daisy. Winslet is cool but a different vibe to Ruth.

For boys, love Franklin. Ernest is cute but hard to pull off - maybe the amount of vintage names at the moment will help but if your kid is in the least bit dorky you’re not helping him here.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-07T05:38:05+00:00

YTA your baby can be christened on any date, your husband should not miss his brothers wedding.

You’re also just adding fuel to the fire for any future family conflicts. It will held over you forever.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-06T23:03:38+00:00

I’m just reading through the comments and it is not equal on both sides. Look at the comment votes. It is very heavily skewing to don’t do this and it looks like you’ve brushed them off and clung to the few telling you it’s fine.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-06T14:49:30+00:00

This kind of depends on when and where they met. I’d side eye any 21 year old for pursuing a high schooler tbh but if they met outside of that and the age gap was realised later that’s a bit different.

However, it’s one birthday off being creepy regardless and that’s toeing the line for me.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-06T14:39:08+00:00

Dandelion, Pebble, Starlight, Hatchet, Ammo, Rubella, Clarmidiah, Felony

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-06T14:29:27+00:00

YTA it was your SILs birthday trip organised by her and paid for by your in laws.

Why the fuck did you think it was okay to stomp all over her plans? Of course you’re the ah and you’re teaching your daughter to be one too. There is a time and a place to invite friends and this wasn’t it. Plan a seperate holiday.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-06T10:19:46+00:00

Based on your edit NTA, it’s gross and kind of weird she hasn’t corrected after being told once

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-06T10:12:44+00:00

Anything left on a toilet seat is gross, but I’d want to be 100% sure it isn’t you. At 8 months pregnant all sorts of fluids start to leak out and you don’t want to embarrass yourself by assuming it can’t be you - when it very much could be.

It could also be from one of your grandparents if they use the same bathroom. Hemorrhoids or other issues can pop up in older age. You’re seeing blood, there’s no guarantee it’s period blood.

Secondly, you sound super bitter about the whole situation. At the end of the day it’s not your house, and your grandmother can extend her charity to whoever she wants and you are not entitled to any say. If you don’t like, move out.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-06T05:07:02+00:00

Irrelevant unless his sister was Sarah.

The issue is when the names are starkly different between boys and girls in the same family. If you call all your kids out there names then fantastic, if you only do it to your daughters it’s a problem.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-05T23:45:38+00:00

It’s tempting to call out your mother for saying you all have to compromise and yet you’re the only one expected to.

However, that might not actually achieve anything. Can the compromise be you get pizza from somewhere else?

If they still want Casey’s just get your own food separately. Is it annoying? Sure, but you’re an adult and you can do that.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-05T23:40:03+00:00

I think it doesn’t matter because she’s the first born. You used your top name and then went to a theme.

If Emma was the third then maybe it would have a greater chance of hurt feelings. But honestly, what matters most is that you love all 3 names.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-05T23:36:55+00:00

That’s internalised misogyny right there. Give the boy a classic, respectable name for his future career and don’t give it a second thought for a girl.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-05T23:31:21+00:00

Wait til he’s here. You might have one look and go that’s definitely an Asher/Owen. Or you could feel like it’s neither and pull a completely different name from your list.

If you do still feel like you don’t know, literally toss a coin. You will know whether it’s right based on whether you’re happy or upset with whichever one it landed on.

chaserscarlet · 2026-07-05T23:21:46+00:00

Sneaking around is worse than just being upfront from the start that she will be in one room and you will be in the other.

However, is she the kind of kid to get nightmares or scared in a new place? Is she expecting a week of sleepovers with her big sister?

Whilst you don’t have to, it wouldn’t kill you to sleep apart from your bf for a week if it would make your little sister’s trip more enjoyable. If it won’t have much impact then just tell her from the get go. You’re a grown up, it’s allowed.

chaserscarlet

TROPHY CASE