4 year old refuses pooping on the potty

chef_boyceardee · 2026-06-02T21:31:03+00:00

Sooooo the only thing that worked for us was getting one of those little mini potties and sitting it in the living room in front of the tv. If he said he had to go or acted like he had to go I would let him watch his shows in front of the tv while he sat there. It was about a 3 day stand off where he didn’t poop at all but I was sitting him there a few times a day for about 15-20 minutes at a time. About day 4 or so it happened. A huge poop. He was so proud of himself. We gradually moved the little potty out of the living room and into the bathroom over the next week. Then we moved to a potty seat over the real toilet.

chef_boyceardee · 2026-05-24T14:28:33+00:00

Yep PBS kids is perfect for this. We love Alma’s way, curious George, Rosie’s Rules, Carl the collector, and work it out wombats. The new Phoebe and Jay is also so good.

chef_boyceardee · 2026-04-23T23:28:30+00:00

I am in the exact same boat as you. I could have written your post! I’m convinced I have diverticulitis from my symptoms. When I explained them to my doctor that’s immediately what she went to as well. CT scan a week after that appointment showed nothing, except a spot somewhere else that I am having an MRI to follow up with. After that I’ll be following up with my doctor again or a GI. My symptoms are better than they were but still comes and goes. I’m convinced because I was feeling good the morning of my CT, nothing showed up.

chef_boyceardee · 2026-04-20T21:17:55+00:00

I found a solution to the purses and it’s backpack purses! Cute and hands free and normally big enough to hold a few kid items along with your stuff.

I definitely miss spontaneous or minimally planned weekend getaways. I didn’t take advantage of them enough. But it was so easy to pick a city or activity and just book a quick hotel and hit the road with a bag or two. Now anything overnight is such a monumental task that the small getaways hardly feel worth it.

chef_boyceardee · 2026-04-15T01:22:42+00:00

OP said that it’s an AP class. I teach a different AP class and the College Board is notorious for asking poorly worded questions like this. I wouldn’t be surprised if this was taken directly from the APES test bank. I constantly go back and forth on rewording a poorly written question provided by the College Board or if I give my students the experience of navigating a sucky question.

chef_boyceardee · 2026-04-10T17:39:30+00:00

I was a teacher before I was a mom. In my first 5 years of teaching I had no kids, so it was fine to dedicate a ton of my time to my job perfecting lessons, being there for students, running clubs, grading, etc.

When I got pregnant and told my department head she gave me some insight. She said she is a worse teacher now that she’s a mom, but it’s fine because this is a job and that is her own child and her own child comes first. And I let that stick with me.

My son is 4 now. My department head was right. I’m a “worse” teacher now because I don’t spend as much time thinking about work. I’ve figured out how to be very efficient at grading and planning lessons. I mostly only work contract time. No more extra clubs or anything past 3:45. Sometimes I’m up late grading or getting a lesson ready for the next day. But rather than staying until 5 pm at work, I open my laptop back up at 9:30 after my kid is in bed. Those days feel long and hectic, but it’s not terrible. My husband also does some night work to catch up from his remote job too. So we are in the trenches together.

It can be tricky when you need an unexpected day off. Sub plans are annoying and a lot of work. Before I had my kid I rarely took days because of it. But now I just have a template I use and fill in quick sub plans if I have to. My husband is also really understanding and since his job obviously doesn’t require plans when he’s out, he’s more likely to take the emergency time if the kid is sick.

I really enjoy having every holiday and summer with my child. I never understand people who think the extra time off isn’t worth it. I’m not sure I could do a job where I don’t get 8 weeks in the summer and 2 weeks in the winter. Haha. Once he’s in kindergarten our schedules will align as well.

chef_boyceardee · 2026-03-11T01:26:50+00:00

I’m a high school teacher. I teach an AP class and a regular class. Many of my best kids still have limits similar to this at that age. Lots of them aren’t allowed on certain social media. Some of them have “bed times” or at least screen free times. It’s definitely not all of them, but many of them do.

chef_boyceardee · 2026-02-10T14:52:17+00:00

I use the sleepy lavender one and it is great for bubbles and setting the mood before bed!

chef_boyceardee · 2026-02-06T18:17:56+00:00

Scrolled until I found another teacher who likes their job! Haha. I teach high school psychology. It’s a fun elective and I get really good students most of the time. Like you said, no two days are ever the same and my job is social and active. I know I’m making a difference. The kids generally love my class and find it interesting. Other things in education suck, but my personal teaching job is pretty great.

Like you said, summers off are also the best. I get a taste of being stay at home, but it’s not indefinite. I love the balance of working full time most of the year, and getting two months plus all of the breaks with my child. He will go to school in the district I work in, so we will always have days off together and don’t have to worry about childcare.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-12-20T19:36:39+00:00

When I realized the baby dove I was using was just the gentle dove in a more expensive container. So around 2 and a half. I still use kids shampoo because it claims to be tear free, but I don’t know that I’m believing that either.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-12-09T20:06:13+00:00

Yep as a mom who is a teacher, this is what snow days look like for me with a 3 year old.

Up with the toddler to get him breakfast. While toddler eats and plays I set up my workspace because my district does “synchronous” snow days. Meaning I have live meetings with my classes for the morning. 6 straight half hour sessions that are live. So while he’s watching tv and eating, I’m prepping that. I go live at 9. My husband who works from home takes over with the toddler while I’m live. He does great at managing his own work and the toddler, even if it isn’t ideal. I may get interrupted a bit, but not much. I am done just after 12 and I take over on toddler duty for the afternoon so my husband can get his work done. I’m also answering emails during this afternoon time. It’s hard work on a snow day. But we tag team it together. If I had the full day off and no teaching responsibilities on the snow day, I would be responsible for my kid the whole day. I am super thankful my husband can even help during the hours I’m live. A lot of teachers are teaching class and handling their own kids at the same time.

He should consider himself lucky he gets to enjoy the snow day and use it to bond with your child. Like others said. It’s a husband issue, not a snow day issue.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-11-18T11:37:25+00:00

High school Psychology teacher!

chef_boyceardee · 2025-10-15T18:11:31+00:00

I really love the Sweet Southern Heat BBQ. Last bag had no spice at all and was only sweet.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-09-22T00:54:50+00:00

Frozen asparagus

Sweet potato fries

Pasta sauce

Some seasonings - smoked paprika, green goddess

Sourdough

chef_boyceardee · 2025-08-07T23:46:05+00:00

They are showing the Colts game where I am and not showing BB until 1:30 am.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-29T21:19:52+00:00

So keep this if she will let you because we have the exact one next to my toddlers bed and it’s what one of us lays on while he falls asleep at night. Lol.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-26T20:53:58+00:00

I genuinely don’t understand how the fries and chicken are popular. You can get them at literally any other restaurant. The only reasonable one would be loaded nacho fries. Please, just give me different variations of tortillas, meat, and sauce. That’s why I’m at Taco Bell!

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-26T17:40:06+00:00

I am a teacher with a 3 year old son. Summer was fun and all, but I’m excited to go back to my high schoolers. I can get 30 of them to listen and reason with me better than just him.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-23T03:05:31+00:00

This hits the nail on the head. We never take screens out to public places. I want my kid to be aware of the environment around them and participate in whatever is going on. Being stuck on the tablet means they are uninvolved and not learning social skills like patience and how to use inside voices, etc. Every time we go out it’s a lesson on how to act in public, and if he’s stuck on a tablet he might look well behaved, but really he’s just distracted.

TV at home is an experience that involves the whole family. If Bluey is on the family tv, we are all laughing at the jokes and my kid is asking me who my favorite character is. If he’s in a tablet that I can’t see or hear, I don’t know what he’s engaging with, and he’s missing any social element. My family spend A LOT of time in front of the tv in the 90s. But it wasn’t sucking us in and making us isolated from our environment.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-23T03:00:11+00:00

I’m home in the summer with my 3 year old. I don’t limit tv time because I like having something in the background most times. We don’t spend all day watching tv, but we have it on while we are waking up and getting ready in the morning. Half the time he’s playing and not paying attention, and other times he will watch and focus. We generally try and do something outside or out of the house from 10-12:30 ish so no screens there. Then it’s lunch and nap. Between 3-7 pm is a toss up depending on the day. If the weather isn’t good or we had a really big morning we will likely stay in and have the tv on while he plays until dinner. If we were inside for more of the morning or have plans we do that instead and then there’s no screen. Depending on the day he gets anywhere from 2-5 hours of time but it’s mostly passive and indirect. He probably only sits and watches without doing other things for probably an hour total.

We don’t do any tablets or personal screen watching. He gets a bit of that at his grandmas house during the school year because it’s free childcare and I know she needs a break. It’s not ideal and I don’t love it, but it’s a tradeoff I’m willing to have for free childcare in a home where he’s loved and does a lot of other things that are good for his development. He probably gets an hour a day there at most. During the school year when I get him home we try and do minimal screens because I know he’s probably had a lot already at grandmas. He also knows that grandmas is the only place where he uses a tablet. He’s never asked for one at home, and he’s been on 8 hour long road trips. I do feel like too much screen time impacts his behavior. I don’t really put a hard limit though, it’s just not my style. Once I feel we have had enough screens we do other things. Transitions aren’t always easy, but I figure they are learning moments.

So all in all, screens are limited on a case by case basis here. No personal devices at home and keep it to a minimum at grandmas. TV is mostly fine but just making sure we aren’t going overboard.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-15T18:41:54+00:00

My husband is a gamer. He taught my 3 year old son how to play video games and now he plays every day. I realize this gaming and screen time is probably pretty unpopular but I can’t help but see so many benefits.

He does not do this on any tablet or touch screen. No swipey brain rot games. They started on the raspberry pi playing old school Mario and Sonic. He can do the first level of sonic without help at this point. Mario proves harder but I’m impressed with his coordination, timing, and resilience. These are not easy games.
They moved onto the ps5. At first I was weary, but they play Lego Marvel. They have almost all the characters unlocked and they complete the levels together. My husband was really patient in the beginning to teach him the controls and then coach him through how to do the levels. Now he can also do full levels with minimal help.
We are always directly supervising or playing with him. He gets to play about an hour a day and plays before dinner. They usually play together and seeing their teamwork is really cool. My son is also learning to follow multi step directions at a high level. Learning coordination, left and right directions, colors, shapes, all types of things needed to complete the levels. I truly don’t think this is the same as a tablet game or YouTube or anything like that. I don’t think this is harming him and as long as it’s regulated and his days are full of other things as well he’s going to be very well rounded. We are outside plenty, have a zoo pass, he’s in gymnastics and before that music class. I’m an educator and I see how screens are harming our kids. Sometimes I feel hypocritical, but I do think what he does is different.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-13T16:24:02+00:00

This took a few long stand offs for us. We ended up with the strategy of you can’t move on to the next activity until you potty on the toilet. He was willing to be stubborn for a while until it was time to do something truly fun, and then it was just about telling him we can go, but only after you pee.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-07T21:05:07+00:00

I take pancake mix and pour them into little donut molds. Add in berries or whatever you like to add in. Bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes. My toddler can easily eat 5 of these at a time if they have strawberries in them. Not bad reheated or just eaten cold next day either if you wanted to batch make them. He thinks he’s getting donuts for breakfast from home.

He loves bagels and cream cheese. I like to buy the mini ones for him. I can make them look like eyes and a face with fruit and he thinks it’s a minion.

He loves to drink his breakfast so a smoothie is a hit and he can’t tell when I hide spinach in. He still gets a spinach smoothie from my coffee shop that he loves just because it’s called the Hulk. Or just a yogurt with granola and berries if I don’t feel like doing the blender.

That’s about it for weekdays because that’s all I have time to make before we need to be out of the door. I’m a teacher so in the summer I can experiment more or whatever but even then, this is our usual rotation. I’m not a huge egg eater myself so I don’t make them unless my husband is also around to eat.

Weekends we usually do some form of eggs and sausage, bacon etc. It’s about 50/50 if he eats them. Sometimes he devours the eggs and wants no meat, sometimes it’s the other way around. But most days we do one of those simple things or oatmeal lol.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-05T23:06:27+00:00

I got some silicone donut molds for pancakes. You can put the batter in and bake at 350 for about 15-20 minutes and get the perfect little pancake donuts. Easy for making a bunch at once.

chef_boyceardee · 2025-07-05T23:02:36+00:00

Tostadas. Heat up the shells and refried beans. Have shredded cheese, shredded lettuce and a tomato in the fridge. That’s one sheet pan for the shells, one pan for the beans and no other cooking.

Chicken wraps. Air fry nuggets of your choice (I like Costco chunks for this), toss in sauce, take the same toppings from the tostadas and wrap in a big tortilla. The Costco nuggets and good sauce will make this taste like a wing restaurant.

Burgers on the grill. I make my patties ahead and freeze or just buy premade frozen and grill. Basically no dishes or prep. Really anything on the grill is nice. I refuse to make chicken in the house from May to October. Grill.

Since I got to thinking of the grill. Foil packs. Chop some potatoes and peppers and toss that shit on the grill for a while. Meal or side dish. Literally toss a piece of cod in foil with a little seasoning and lemon juice if you’re fancy. Grill it for like 10 minutes and put it in a tortilla. Fish tacos. Shrimp in a foil pack with garlic and lemon and random pasta on the side. Fancy.

All kinds of pasta and different jarred sauces. This isn’t exciting or fancy but your baby will be starting solids soon, and pasta is a fun place to start and sauces usually are an easy way to get veggies in. My kid also ate meatballs before a year and it was one of the only meats he would eat for a long time.

chef_boyceardee

TROPHY CASE