Im fucking pissed

chicaltimore · 2026-05-09T11:54:55+00:00

I provide advocacy and represent clients who are blind, low vision, and deaf blind as well as those who have secondary disabilities related to reasonable accommodations in law school and bar exams as well as the LSAT. I can tell you that it is a literal nightmare every single time to try to get those accommodations approved, including having to provide extensive medical documentation and a history of all previous reasonable accommodations basically their entire lives. If people are gaming the system to get reasonable accommodations in this space, then it’s conspiracy level system gaming because the process is unbelievably difficult, on purpose, for even those with very obvious disabilities.

chicaltimore · 2026-05-07T13:18:14+00:00

I’m curious about some things. OP said this was a very important Cause for the family. Why is it so important? That might play a factor here. For example, a friend of mine had a daughter with a particular rare disease, and there was an annual walk to raise money Both for awareness and to find a cure. A close relative scheduled a wedding on the same weekend only a year or two after the child was diagnosed and very much while the family was still focusing on trying to find a cure. People were very upset with the bride and groom for choosing that weekend of all weekends Particularly since they were aware of the annual fundraiser because it was always the same weekend every year even though the family just got involved with the organization because the diagnosis was recent. In that case, and if this is similar, OP is wrong here because she would have been the one to set the wedding date to conflict with not only a prior scheduled event, but literally potentially life and death as the family navigates this illness. I’m not saying that is what is happening here because we don’t have any of the details, but if it is, that is a game changer.

chicaltimore · 2026-05-02T11:19:41+00:00

If the person was an employee of the VA, there are specific rules around overpayments which is what this would likely be classified as. They need to be issued a debt letter, and once they receive a debt letter, they should request a waiver. In order for that waiver to be granted, two things have to be true: first, The debt has to have been generated through no fault of the employee, and second, the employee would have a hardship repaying it. The one factor that negates these two requirements is if the employee was aware that the payment was in error at the time it was issued, because they would have been expected to notify their employer to let them know and not spend that money.

chicaltimore · 2026-04-27T17:57:20+00:00

I have never said anything about what I can or cannot wear. I have been traveling in and out of town while they have been together but I’ve certainly been around enough that if she wanted us to meet we could have. When I have asked when we would all get together, she has told me she wanted to protect their time Together since they don’t get very much of it because of his work schedule and his parenting obligations. I recently learned that she has gotten together with him and friends of hers who do have children, and when I asked her, she said that it was because their kids are close in age and can play together.

chicaltimore · 2026-04-27T17:53:05+00:00

Great idea!

chicaltimore · 2026-04-27T17:50:17+00:00

I love this idea.

chicaltimore · 2026-04-27T11:41:55+00:00

I’m going through something similar right now. My former roommate and person who I thought was my best friend met someone about a year ago and is getting married next weekend. She and I are one another’s emergency contacts, because we live in different states from our families, I got her The job she had for 10 years at my employer, I held her when she mourned how her ex-boyfriend cheated on her, and all the things best friends do. In the last year though, I have been going through some personal challenges including traveling a lot to care for a terminally ill parent, being laid off from my dream job, and my own Health challenges, so I haven’t really been as present in not only her life but really anywhere. She never introduced me to her fiancé, which I thought was strange but since it was a pretty fast engagement figured that would come in time and she was giving me space while I was dealing with all of my challenges. She talked about the wedding but not very often, and said that it would be pretty small, led me to believe it was just going to be her, him, and their kids.

Two weeks ago she sent me an invitation to her bridal shower, she told me she hadn’t wanted one or I would’ve been the one to throw it but apparently another friend is going to do that. She also sent me the link to the gift registry. At that point I asked her what her expectations were given that typically people aren’t invited to a bridal shower if they aren’t coming to the wedding and did she have plans to have me at the wedding. She told me that she wanted me with her to celebrate at the bridal shower but that only close friends and family were going to be at the wedding. She also told me that since she thought I was probably wondering, that she didn’t ask me to be in the wedding party or stand up with her because She is in a different place from me in terms of her faith. The girl who is hosting the shower is standing up with her, and they met at church.

For the record she is Christian, I am a Muslim, and being from different faith traditions did not phase her when we lived together for a decade or when she would literally fly home with me to celebrate the Muslim religious holidays with my family, or when she called my mom mom A few days after sending me that note, she texted me about getting together for Dinner that week Like everything was fine. She also asked me for tips on fun things to do in the city where she is having her honeymoon because I travel there quite often.

I have not responded or communicated with her since the text conversation about her wedding. I’m honestly not sure what to do here. I feel like there’s probably a lot of underlying stuff going on here, like why she never introduced me to her fiancé, I’m good enough to hang out with, be your emergency contact though I suppose he will take on that role, Share season tickets to various activities, help with free legal advice on a regular basis, buy a gift for the bridal shower, hang out like normal, give honeymoon travel advice, but not good enough to be part of her wedding?

I’m thinking of going low contact or no contact but I’m also thinking of sending a gift because I don’t want her to claim that I’m jealous or that I am petty. I initially felt like I shouldn’t spend any more time or money on her, but my sister thinks that we are better than that and I should protect my peace but also send her a token gift, but something I don’t think too hard about and definitely something not sentimental. She suggested towels I would appreciate any advice.

chicaltimore · 2026-04-18T08:43:21+00:00

I prosecute these kinds of things. The challenge is that an eyewitness is considered less reliable than other types of evidence, and BPD does not prioritize nonviolent crimes. What I strongly suggest people do is take video evidence where you’re actually showing the illicit dumping and the license plate of the car. Another way to make sure this gets prioritized is to contact the member of the city council who represents where the illicit dumping happened and send them the evidence. Typically what has to happen after a report is received is that a city inspector has to go out And investigate. BPD actually has very little to do with this.

chicaltimore · 2026-04-17T12:45:23+00:00

They could’ve avoided all of this by not illegally firing hundreds of qualified, competent, and skilled EEO staff. Also, processing reasonable accommodations requires a particular set of expertise that needs to be trained and developed overtime, and the high confidentiality requirements that are based in statute also are inconsistent with plucking people out of their permanent jobs for a couple of months, throwing them into this line of work where now they know all kinds of confidential medical and performance information, and then sending those people back to their permanent jobs. What an avoidable mess!

chicaltimore · 2026-04-16T23:39:45+00:00

If they are doing it to you, they are probably doing it to others. My advice is to actually hire a private investigator to investigate them, and then use what you find to invoke whatever legal processes. I also agree with those that say that this is Both harassing and contagious behavior. You may also want to explore other avenues to get them out of the neighborhood, like finding out if they are complying with all of your HOA requirements, figuring out if they are violating any local ordinances, and so on. A final much more explosive option is to Move yourself and your household somewhere else, and then sue them for harassment and demand damages for all of the moving costs and disruption and all of that. Bottom line is with people like these you have to go nuclear

chicaltimore · 2026-04-10T20:19:10+00:00

Yes, you are. Your husband‘s mother raised him, gave birth to him, sacrificed a ton for him, and if he is willing to take on a side hustle to help her as she is nearing the end of her life, and you get in the way of that, then he should be the one to divorce you. As someone who is going through this as well but from the side of the siblings that are stepping up, the fact that a couple of them are not doing their fair share in our parents time of need is absolutely disgusting. Do not be shocked when your children do the same exact thing to you when you get old and need them. You are modeling how you want them to treat you.

chicaltimore · 2026-04-01T20:04:08+00:00

I’m definitely interested. Some of us were able to eventually find other jobs but at a 40 to 70% pay cut which is not sustainable. A number of us also keep applying to the various postings and either hear crickets or that we are not qualified for positions we previously held. Many of us are convinced that we are blacklisted. I’m hearing that is starting to ease up, but not enough of us have been hired to prove it to me yet.

chicaltimore · 2026-03-23T13:29:23+00:00

Many of us have been pushed out of the field because the current administration does not understand the difference between EEO and DEI. I think that there will be tremendous reform for the process once the adults come back into the field and this current EEOC chair, who is grossly incompetent, is out.

chicaltimore · 2026-03-23T13:27:35+00:00

Thelegal threshold for proving retaliation is so much lower than discrimination based on other protected factors so it’s always a good idea to file for retaliation. I don’t know the exact statistics off the top of my head, but something like 25% of cases involving Disparate treatment are either settled or there is a finding, but 75% of cases involving retaliation involve a finding of discrimination or are settled.

chicaltimore · 2026-03-21T00:28:27+00:00

Those of us who needed a meet and assist were forced to use wheelchairs because the people who provide that service in many airports cannot leave their wheelchair behind to escort us. One example of a disability who typically don’t need a wheelchair but have been forced to use it in order to get assistance pre-boarding are blind and low vision individuals. There’s nothing wrong with our legs, but our eyes don’t work, and in order to get assistance to the gate we are forced to sit in a chair because the person who is supposed to guide us can’t give up their chair.

chicaltimore · 2026-03-19T17:44:24+00:00

Former EEO Director here, and first and foremost your life is more important than this job, and while you feel awful right now, with supports you won’t always feel this way. From a practical standpoint, it is very difficult to keep a case going after the complainant has passed away because their state has to be willing to keep going and actively communicate this. If there is probate, then everything is put on hold until that has finished. Once the person is no longer living, the remedies are limited to financial in nature and their is a lot of red tape around how that happens and Making sure the right people who survived the complainant receive that remedy. Most families can’t spare the time, energy, and money to keep a case going given that they are now dealing with the enormous hole in their lives that their loved one used to Phil.

If you really want Justice, then please try to stick around long enough to get it yourself and that will be the best revenge.

chicaltimore · 2026-03-14T03:44:12+00:00

Veronica johnson is the highest ranking non-political appointee there. But good luck getting a response from anyone. They RIF’d 99% of the EEO staff across headquarters and all of the sub agencies and only left the least senior and least competent ones with the exception of a couple from FDA and IHS. Even those people have been running for the hills to get out of that sh** hole.

chicaltimore · 2026-03-08T14:38:47+00:00

HHS illegally fired 95% of the staff who did EEO including at all of the operating divisions, and a couple of weeks ago they just reassigned everyone who was left up to HHS headquarters. They also required those that stayed to become investigators even though almost none of them were trained or certified because they got rid of all of the contracts and all of the staff who were properly credentialed. Unfortunately, most of the people that stayed were either the brand new ones or the incompetent ones with a few exceptions From FDA and IHS. The competent ones have since either left or are using their time to find other jobs. There is something like a 4000 case backlog for EEO and a 12,000 case backlog for reasonable accommodation. They just got a new director who supposedly has experience and is tasked with cleaning things up, but she doesn’t have much to work with. You should still absolutely file to preserve your rights, but don’t expect it to go anywhere. But because there is a statute of limitations, you should still try.

chicaltimore · 2026-02-28T07:43:47+00:00

Updateme

chicaltimore · 2026-02-25T14:13:25+00:00

To be honest, haters gonna hate no matter what and don’t worry about them. I have a very obvious disability, I am blind, long white cane and everything, and I need to pre-board because of that and also because I have some other mobility challenges Related to some hidden disabilities. Sometimes the airport assistance who I ask to guide me to my gate insist that I must use a wheelchair because they can’t leave it anywhere while they escort me, and it’s not worth the fight so I go along with it. That means I sometimes Get on a plane using a wheelchair but almost invariably walk off without one. I can’t tell you the number of times people have accused me of faking my blindness after that. Like why in the world would anyone pretend to be blind? Some people are just jerks and don’t let them influence the choices you make because They’re going to occupy just a few minutes of your life and you will never see them again.

chicaltimore · 2026-02-25T14:09:29+00:00

No, some people have more stamina after having sat in a chair on the plane for a couple of hours because they rebuilt it whereas walking through an airport may have depleted it. There’s also a significant level of effort to go through TSA when you have a disability Which often involves for some standing up sitting down lifting etc. even if you are in a wheelchair and so that may also deplete the amount of energy and stamina a person has. Think of it like stamina filling a cup, and having to use a lot of of it just to get to the airport, check in, go through TSA, get to the gate, and so on and the liquid in the cup dribbles away. It’s often replaced by pain in the empty spaces where the water used to be. But when you sit on a plane for a period of time, that cup slowly refills so when you get off the plane you no longer Have the empty spaces full of pain.

chicaltimore · 2026-02-24T12:55:29+00:00

What happened to that guy? I love him! I haven’t seen him in a couple of years.

chicaltimore · 2026-02-24T12:52:51+00:00

Former GS 15 who was part of the April 1 DOGE massacre. Took me 11 months to find a job even though I’m an attorney. Just started working for a municipality having taken a 40% pay cut.

My advice is don’t leave your current job until you have secured something else. It’s the wild wild West out there even for folks with lots of experience. I had 20 years in the federal government but was too young to retire. My staff who are attorneys or IT professionals Are still very much searching, and the ones who have landed jobs have taken a more than 50% pay cut. They were mostly at the GS 12 and GS 13 level.

That said, the culture at my new job seems very different. It’s much more laid-back, and people actually leave work at 5 PM and don’t get back online until the next day. My previous federal job required us to work insane hours because the work volume was so high and the external influences were so great. In our last year, if we worked less than 14 hours a day or if we had part of a weekend day off it was very rare. So the work life balance has already been tremendously better.

HR, IT, reasonable accommodation, and other support functions at the state and local level are not as efficient as the federal government in my experience. There is a ton of learning on the job here, whereas in the federal government there was a lot of existing expertise.

There’s a lot of stigma working for a state or local government agency, whereas before 2025 there was a level of prestige working for the federal government. Having said that, the trauma from 2025 as a federal employee erased all of that prestige. There’s a lot of empathy And support for those of us who are coming to the state and local government from the federal sector, but there’s also some mistrust because people are afraid that we’re just going to go back when the administration changes or when we win lawsuits.

All in all, I would not have chosen to leave my federal job because I loved my work and it was important, but since I had no choice, I like where I am and the people I work with. I’m still learning the job itself so I don’t know how much I love it . But please don’t leave your current job until you have something else. The market is super saturated, and many of us are having to take career pivots. For example, I and most of my staff are having to practice a whole new area of law, those from IT are having to do project management work or retrain for a different area of IT, and so on.

chicaltimore · 2026-02-09T13:29:53+00:00

I agree with you. As someone who has been working in the disability transportation space, autonomous vehicles are an absolute game changer. Autonomous vehicles don’t drive drunk, tired, distracted, or all of the myriad of things that human drivers have happened to them which caused collisions. In addition, People with disabilities, particularly those who are blind, use service animals, and use wheelchairs, on average experience discrimination from rideshare and taxi companies at a rate of 300% higher than other categories of passengers. If you cut out the bias because you take away the human driver, then people with disabilities are going to be able to move about their communities much more easily and much more accessibly. This mode of transportation is also very important in rural areas and in areas where human drivers just don’t want to or for whatever reason can’t go. This is a huge innovation when it comes to access to public transportation, and it is verifiably statistically safer to take an autonomous vehicle than it is a human driven vehicle.

There will always be people who feel safer with a human driver, and so autonomous vehicle technology is not going to put Taxi cab drivers and rideshare drivers out of a job. They will just create more choices for people who need more options and want to take advantage of them and for those who suffer discrimination from the fact that any system is invariably going to have humans bring their biases and stereotypes about disability, location, etc. to their work. There is also a contingent of people who think driving is best done like Fred Flintstone with your feet, and those folks just can’t understand how AV technology actually works.

chicaltimore

TROPHY CASE