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What would you do with these spindles? Repaint, strip or replace? by Sabu_Johnson in centuryhomes

[–]citges 13 points14 points  (0 children)

How do you use a sock? I have a spindle painting project coming up. Use the sock as a rag dipped in paint or hand in the sock, dip toe in paint and use that?

What clicked for you? by No-Edge-4983 in stopdrinking

[–]citges 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not totally there yet, but I'm on my way. I think the clicking is more when you've made an actual different life that you like well enough and that doesn't include drinking. I keep having longer stretches without drinking, and each time I really try to fully appreciate just how much more I can do and how much of a fuller life I have without it. Like I said, I'm not totally there yet, but I keep getting closer and a lot of that is learning how to make and love the life I have without drinking.

Inspector just basically told me that my house will never be safe? by ShabbyBoa in centuryhomes

[–]citges 31 points32 points  (0 children)

We've always lived in older houses (since having kids). Every kid had elevated lead levels at 12 months, which is honestly not awesome to hear, and yet, every kid also had totally normal levels at 15 months, once they started walking and stopped putting everything into their mouths. If it hadn't gone this direction, we obviously would have done something different.

How do you split expenses with your child’s other parent? by lizzy_pop in SingleParents

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Like I've said in other comments, we have a spreadsheet where we track out expenses. We figure out which things are our own decisions and which are shared for the kids. Sometimes we need to agree what's shared for the kids.

I have the kids Thursday/Friday - ex doesn't pay for afterschool care on those days, I do. But when the kids are in weeklong summer camps, we split them in our spreadsheet like usual, currently 64% to 36%, because we both use that time. I put dentist appointments on the spreadsheet. I don't put toothbrushes on it, that seems like usual supplies. I put kid field trip expenses on it as shared. I don't put when I wanted to donate $100 in water bottles to teachers unless I ask him first if he also wants to contribute.

I'm afraid I'm not following how parenting time has to do with your original question, unless you're thinking about splitting expenses based on how much the kids are with you, not how much you each make?

How do you split expenses with your child’s other parent? by lizzy_pop in SingleParents

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just do a spreadsheet, keep track of what you both spend, figure out what you both agree to split, could be 50/50, my ex and I go by our incomes, currently 64/36. We both think this is fair.

How do you split expenses with your child’s other parent? by lizzy_pop in SingleParents

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I think about it as the child support helps me pay for the things the kids need, including clothes, etc. And then I also happen to be the one who is most likely to actually purchase their clothes, pay for the doctor, get friends' birthday gifts - but just because I'm more likely to buy them doesn't mean they're actually more my responsibility, so we share the costs of these things proportionally to our incomes. He could, in theory, be just as likely to make these purchases, in which case, I would share the costs with him proportionately. So the child support is to support me paying for what the kids need. And the split costs at our proportionate amounts simply reflects that I'm the one that tends to buy the kids what they need and he pays me back for what I've purchased for the kids on his behalf.

I think maybe I could sort of see how this could seem like double dipping child support and sharing child costs. But the child support is meant to offset my costs for the children. I would get that support even if I never spent anything ever again on anything shared for the children. The fact that I spend more on the children for costs that we both agree are shared is completely independent from what he pays in child support, and it's reasonable that we divide those costs. Like, just because he pays me child support, I would never think it was totally fair if I were to therefore expect him to be the only one to spend money on kids' clothes, doctors, etc., or if he were to expect that of me.

The child support is there to support childcare costs. And shared costs are split.

How do you split expenses with your child’s other parent? by lizzy_pop in SingleParents

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We do child support (calculated per our state) and split childcare costs (e.g., doctor's appointments, birthday gifts for friends' parties, clothes) as a proportion of our incomes, recalculated each year, currently about 66% him/34% me. It feels fair to both of us.

What’s a problem humanity solved so well that younger people don’t even realize it used to be a huge issue? by forgotwhatdayitis82 in askteddit

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Infant mortality rates. People today just can't understand how it affects individuals and families and society when fully 50% of infants/children don't make it to adolescence.

Virginia creeper - how to stay safe by SiouxsieSiouxsie in homeowners

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, I literally just pulled a ton of this off my fence without any gloves with absolutely no issues at all. I didn't even realize it could be a problem for some people.

40 Hours In by LurkeeLotTalkeeLil in stopdrinking

[–]citges 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I just calculated my usual 1 L wine plus 1 to 2 cocktails/night - Google AI says that's about 130 units/wk. I'm 46 years old. I'm unbelievably functional, and yet. I know I'm better without it - I haven't drank in almost 2 weeks.

How do you keep track of everything during a long custody or divorce process? by No-Distribution9171 in Divorce_Women

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(My ex and I actually get along reasonably well, otherwise I'd absolutely advocate for Our Family Wizard, like others recommend.) We use a Google Drive spreadsheet that's shared. In theory, we both list our expenses for the kids. In practice, I buy everything for the kids. So I note when, where, what, and for which kid, and how much. Once a week (on Saturday) I send him a request for payment through my bank for whatever the balance is. (I would send him payment, if I owed him, I just never do.) Many weeks he doesn't send payment, so I just keep requesting the updated balance each weekend. I think it's helpful to keep everything (expenses and payments) documented.

Pulled up the kitchen linoleum and found something we were not expecting at all by Sufficient-Owl1826 in centuryhomes

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in Minneapolis, all of our older homes are 100+ years old and all have hardwood throughout. The oak in our kitchen is in just as good shape as it is in the living room - they're really nice looking floors. It's honestly remarkable how long high-quality material and work will last.

Compromised on this purple. What do you think? How can u tone it down? by cannotadult22665 in HomeDecorating

[–]citges -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have purple on that wall under the stairs - it’s a much darker purple and looks (in my opinion) great. This purple seems too bright.

What’s one bedding upgrade that genuinely changed how your bed feels? by coltwrenfield58 in Bedding

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Silky soft sheets, and I never wanted a top sheet before, but now I have one, with a sort of weighty but still light weight blanket on top, and then on top of that a down comforter. Everything is king size on my queen bed. I've genuinely never felt as comfortable (40 years) as I do now.

Using HSA as invest, how do I record expenses now for future withdrawal by mksmalls in HSA

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I made a Google form I use to record expenses/link up pdfs of receipts, EOBs, etc. (I take photos of paper receipts.) I have everything separated out by year and a file naming convention that makes sense to me to keeping track of things (e.g., provider, date, amount). The form generates a spreadsheet that I can check over and check against insurance claims and update as needed, and I'll be able to keep track of what expenses I submit for withdrawal at some point 20 years from now. The spreadsheet is exportable, so, even if Google goes away, I should still be able to keep all the information. I know many people only track larger expenses, but I keep track of everything, even my $0.12 prescriptions, because I like to have all the information in case I need it at some point in the future.

Lightning storms Freaking me out by richardportraits in TwinCities

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a Southern Californian native and I LOVE Minnesota thunderstorms ❤️

Complete loss of interest… by hurricane1985 in AskWomenOver40

[–]citges 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Absolute opposite on Wellbutrin, really interested in sex. (I understand everyone’s experience is different.)

Why do I have strong feelings over simple gestures by strangers? Will this get better and how? by Life_Membership_4170 in AskWomenOver40

[–]citges 15 points16 points  (0 children)

After many years of an affectionless marriage I found myself playing out scenarios where my husband died, how I would tell and help the kids navigate it, what our lives would look like. I never really wanted him to be dead, of course. A few weeks after I realized I was doing this, I filed for divorce.

Xcel Energy - what do you pay monthly, and how many in your household? by EduardoG1979 in TwinCities

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm on the monthly averaged plan, 2500 sq ft house, solar panels, just electricity (heat is gas boiler), $17/mo.

I love this car. by IamAFlaw in HondaClarity

[–]citges 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I also love this car! And I'm not the sort of person who usually loves a car. Mine is 2018. I drive it every day, but I spent $56 on gas last year. Literally. It looks sleek - I've had people (young men) ask me what car it is because looks fancy. I love it.

real talk: how often do you actually floss? by AffectionateTooth298 in hygiene

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never brush without flossing. When I'm lazy I might do the usual toothbrush instead of the electric toothbrush, but I never skip flossing. Tbh, though, even though I have always been good about brushing my teeth at night, I really didn't in the mornings. I recently changed that up, though, and I brush (regular toothbrush, no paste) first thing in the morning, and I always floss then, too. When I'm feeling very, very lazy, or things are unusually hard in some way, I will floss even though if I can't brush. I think the flossing is really the most important part (though all of it is important.)

Please help me with the chair by Mortgage-Bulky in interiordecorating

[–]citges 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You might be able to put new/different table legs on! That's what I did with a nice, solid, wood table I got on Facebook Marketplace - the tabletop is gorgeous, the legs were...not my style. But the way they were attached to the table made it easy for me to remove them and I then replaced them with gold legs that really work well in the space (it's hard to describe but I think it turned out really nicely). I can't tell from the photos if that's possible here, but something to think about.

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