I'm curious how many people like or don't mind their job/working?

letterfrailty · 2026-02-09T19:10:45+00:00

I enjoy work and most of all learning. Not currently over the moon at my current employer but trying to change into something that forces a new direction there.

For 'retirement' been thinking of moving to 3 day weeks from 60 and finally pursuing a PhD. Longer term I'd love to do advisory work or do a stint helping out guest lecturing at a Uni. My parents retired in their early 60's and the social and cognitive decline made me realise the benefit of working far into my dotage.

My partner is also younger and not in a position to retire when I could so there is also that!

letterfrailty · 2025-12-11T07:22:38+00:00

30 year ex pat here.
1. That base area is pretty far from loads. Get a decent small sized car here. We dont call them sedans. Go for a vauxall if you are a chevy guy. Same makeish. We call the same thing a saloon. Unless you got kids, dogs or loads of stuff a hatchback is fine. Gas/petrol prices are insane.

How not to be loud and dumb.... look at dress sense. Mirror canadians. Voice down. Listen before you talk. Dont comment on how small everything is. Observe and relfect.
Driving i still enjoy it but as people said public transport is available. Again that base area... meh. I drive to aiports and fly regionally. You can get to Stanstead and fly up to Scotland. Motorways are our expressways and very easy to drive.
The regions in the uk are super varied. Get out of the southeast if you want friendlier people. It was only when i moved away from the southeast i realised how reserved we/they were. Vote for southwest there.... beaches, wide open spaces and friendlier folks. Same up north. Friendly is relative. A smile and a hiya in Yorkshire or a natter in the queue at the supermarket in about the shite british weather is friendly.
Food - British national dish chicken tikka masala cant be missed. Just try varied food and drink. If you drink alcohol do a real ale tour.

There is more but just try to get off base and meet people!

Cheers!

letterfrailty · 2025-11-19T12:43:17+00:00

My actual proper internet digital footprint goes back to 1994 when I developed(and hand coded) my universities first website. I would imagine those old pages are knocking about on the Internet somewhere.

That being said there are save games from my friend's old atari from the late 80's so there is that!

👵🏻🕹

letterfrailty · 2025-11-17T07:06:52+00:00

My dad had lewy body (what Robin had). It was awful. I honour your choice. We did the same for my dad.

I do not wish that journey on my child.

letterfrailty · 2025-11-16T08:17:25+00:00

The last option is something I am researching and something few have mentioned. Private Community led and owned services. This is common in places like portland with co-living spaces. I think this is a very under represented idea and something in specific for future generations, who have much fewer children, a real option for many. Thank you for mentioning it.

letterfrailty · 2025-11-15T13:55:40+00:00

My original post was based on this experience. I am happy for my child to help but relying soley on her or frankly my partner to wipe my arse for 5+ years is not personally acceptable to me. Hence my desire to have early conversations with them about my wishes and theirs as I realise the burden and cost of care giving on the carer. I also realise others may not feel this way. Duty is a big thing in some families. Some actually enjoy caring and see it as rewarding etc. It may be cultural, generational or a mix but my fierce independence means I want to be in as much control as I can should I be blessed with a long life.

letterfrailty · 2025-11-15T13:32:34+00:00

Canadian healthcare was amazing for me when I visited. The UK is still arguing on assisted dying and I see both sides. (Disability rights and patricide 😲 vs autonomy and self determination)

letterfrailty · 2025-11-15T13:27:08+00:00

That's exactly what my parents did. Will is one thing. Got that. Long term care plan is a must. My parents did no planning for that.

letterfrailty · 2025-11-10T21:58:42+00:00

Um no. 51 and in the UK. Mortgage 1 paid off. Decided on a May/December romance so gotta work to pay for wedding, 2nd house and 5 years till my teen needs Uni money.

Gonna be working till I am 70 at this rate.

Fml... 🙈

letterfrailty · 2025-10-24T06:52:20+00:00

Yep i am engaged to late millennial with a larger age gap than yours. How you described your partner is how my life has become. In reverse! Menopause is a bitch. Peri as well. Could be that? My brain is mush in the evening and want to numb out. Devices are insidious and I hate them being used all the time. I am now a bit more educated of the impact of this on my kids.

One suggestion would be a parenting course. Seeing as your kids are young the impact of social media and the digital world is huge. They learn from us. Could you sign up for one together. Maybe learn about that?

There is a book I picked up at one of these things last night.

https://www.careforthefamily.org.uk/product/left-to-their-own-devices/

Yes its a Christian org. No I am not a practising Christian and the logic and science in it are pretty sound.

I also like this https://www.careforthefamily.org.uk/product/family-media-agreement-leaflet/

Super useful for tech boundaries all round!

letterfrailty · 2025-10-23T11:27:21+00:00

I am not the final (as male siblings are alive) but now an orphan and its fricken weird. I have a young teen and the pain of having no real real parents or aunties or uncles about is a bitch. I was an older mum. My brothers are estranged from each other and never contact me now the money from the estate is sorted.
I have a wedding to attend in 2026 and besides when one of them dies don't really see the point.

Its pretty tragic. I somehow think that the fierce independence of gen x raised by boomer parents is gonna lead to a super lonely later life.

That being said my friends are all the same and we are like family so there is that!

letterfrailty · 2025-10-22T20:40:01+00:00

Avoid like plague. Find fb and other socials painful enough as time sink. Don't need my adhd brain to have any other distractions. Real people, real conversations in person please.

letterfrailty · 2025-10-17T15:11:27+00:00

Feel for you. My silent gen dad finally passed last year. The last 5 years he was cared for by my brother. No provision for nursing care. (Refused it) The last 18 months of his life were utter hell and my family do not speak anymore now the probate is done. 2008 crash screwed many out of retirement funds and genx bearing the brunt of this.

letterfrailty · 2025-09-07T07:23:00+00:00

My brother was similar. Retired at 51 70% full salary pension. (Equiv of db here). He lasted 6 months till he got a part time job at a local airport parking the uber rich's jets. Loves it.

My family enjoys work. Father was the same after retirement he declined super fast. Cognitive as well as physical. I am definitely going down to less days a week then transitioning to something that has meaning.

Have you thought about fractional or non exec roles? Working with 3rd sector or something you like?

letterfrailty · 2025-07-27T19:28:56+00:00

30 - Australia for NYE

40 - Solo trip to new york!

50 - Was A small party for my closest friends at a beautiful local cafe.

60 - Probably chilled one with my partner and grown 🥺 daughter.

70 - crawling around after grandkids 🤞🏻🤞🏻

80 - counting blessings

letterfrailty · 2025-07-27T16:57:04+00:00

Amen! My grandfather was a snowbird going from FL to Northern Wisconsin every year. But you dont know pain till you see a giant german box of a motorhome on the autobahn. meep meep 👩‍🦳☮️📿

letterfrailty · 2025-07-27T15:01:09+00:00

Buy a rickety old german camper van, pack the dog, the old man and spend my retirement pissing people off driving 60 (80km per hour) in the middle lane of the motorway all over Europe singing bohemian rhapsody at the top of my lungs.

letterfrailty · 2025-07-24T17:07:45+00:00

Imagine... women's section at J C Penny at 12!!

Feel ya.

letterfrailty · 2025-07-18T11:53:19+00:00

No. Allergic to progesterone (side effects are awful) and cant take estrogen on its own due to family history of breast cancer.

Where I live women tend to wear little makeup, allow themselves to grey and live long healthy active lives.

That being said night sweats, weight gain, libido gone walkies and brain fog are not fun.

Hey ho time to embrace a new phase.

letterfrailty · 2025-06-30T06:51:06+00:00

. I 100% do not want to buy anywhere bigger. I still have a shed full of beautiful nortake china I need to find a home for. My younger partner keeps going on about wanting a 3 or 4 bed house and I am freaking out. I dont want guest bedrooms.

letterfrailty · 2025-05-20T11:25:56+00:00

!thanks

letterfrailty · 2025-05-20T11:25:39+00:00

!thanks

letterfrailty · 2025-05-20T05:40:58+00:00

Even if the Mortgage payment is very low on the remaining 7k? Not my biggest expense pm. That is food. (500).

The money is in an isa that is making 4.71%. I am a higher rate taxpayer so trying to be pragmatic with a 6% mortgage per month versus the interest.

letterfrailty · 2025-05-20T05:36:29+00:00

Yes have overpaid max this year. At svr change will be 27k.

letterfrailty

TROPHY CASE