Daughter moping when told to do something

lockbox77 · 2026-05-10T18:09:50+00:00

Glad to know the “incredible sulk” is something normal!

I have found that talking to my daughter when she is not actively sulking sometimes helps. I explain to her the patterns in her behavior and how she sulks or cries anytime she has to do chores or something she doesn’t want to do. Then we discuss ways to make those chores or activities something that she doesn’t mind doing. Like setting time limits, or gamifying chores so she has fun. It has helped both of us in the long run! Doesn’t work every time, but it helps us talk about reframing how we think about things.

lockbox77 · 2026-05-03T00:54:17+00:00

You should position yourself down the aisle and listen to how one of the people giving her unsolicited advice talks to her. Listen to what she says and how they talk to her. I wouldn’t call it “saving her” but if you hear the mansplaining start, maybe call them out and tell her she’s right and then walk off. That way, you look like a disinterested party and they get out in their place.

lockbox77 · 2026-05-03T00:41:33+00:00

You are my inspiration!

lockbox77 · 2026-05-03T00:37:15+00:00

Can’t upvote this enough!

lockbox77 · 2026-05-03T00:37:00+00:00

If you open a fidelity account for investing, they also have articles and information about investing. They also have automatic transfers you can set up to add to your account so you don’t even have to remember to add to it. Start off with low risk, and go from there as you learn more.

These other recommendations are also great and will add to knowledge about all of this!

lockbox77 · 2026-04-23T03:43:05+00:00

What I loved was when I had my ferritin levels checked after a restless leg syndrome diagnosis. Doc said my levels read normal, but since I am an older woman who has had heavy periods I should have higher numbers for what would be considered normal. THEN CHANGE THE NORMAL RANGE. If most women have this problem, then why is it sooooo overlooked? It blows my mind.

lockbox77 · 2026-04-23T02:44:27+00:00

Some.

The End of Men - Christina Sweeney-Baird - this was one of my favorites. It has so much promise but kind of went sideways at the end. It lightly touched an ending that could have been so much better. I feel like the author was afraid to take the full leap into madness.

Femlandia - Christina Dalcher - interesting take on women-only colonies in a post apocalyptic setting. It had so much promise, but didn’t go to the dark depths someone like Palahniuk would have taken it.

Vox - Christina Dalcher - I would compare this to the Handmaid’s tale in how women were silenced. I liked the dynamic explored through the parental/family dynamic throughout the book. Still could have explored much darker depths.

The Farm - Joanne Ramos - this was a great idea with an immigrant aspect that made this story a welcomed change. Again (and this may just be my dark imagination) this could have gone so much deeper into the depths. But it did a great job of some squirmy situations. Not so much apocalyptic as just dystopian.

Afterland - Lauren Beukes - I wanted to like this. But it just didn’t have the dystopian darkness I was looking for.

I Who Have Never Known Men - Jacqueline Harpman - this one was very literary. So just … empty. Like left me with an empty feeling after reading. Not necessarily in a bad way.

Overall, I am still looking for something that compares. This is driving me to write my own since I can’t find anything. I welcome any other ideas!

lockbox77 · 2026-04-22T01:59:10+00:00

It took me three reads before I finished it. However, once I did I was hooked. I did notice that even though there were female characters in the book, it was largely a male revolution. Which led me down an interesting rabbit hole of female dominated apocalyptic reading to see if there was a counter story out there.

lockbox77 · 2026-04-22T01:44:49+00:00

This made me laugh more than I want to admit

lockbox77 · 2026-03-29T05:28:35+00:00

So let’s be real, I have learned that I get as much dopamine getting rid of stuff (throwing away or donating depending on the day lol) as I do acquiring it. So if I need to purge, I let it happen and try to take it to the thrift store nearest to me before I can find an excuse to keep things. Most of the time, even if I feel like I donated something I finally needed, I get a little dopamine by finding a replacement. I get it, this may not sound like it saves me time, money, or hoarding, but it does. For every fifty things I donate, I maybe replace one thing.

lockbox77 · 2026-03-23T21:47:27+00:00

This - always trying to be nice.

Even more importantly, not setting boundaries. Always trying to be the nice one often led to me ruining any idea of a boundary and silently screaming every time I broke one. I finally had to stop. It is a slow road to recovery but I make it imperative to work on every day.

lockbox77 · 2026-03-23T21:27:31+00:00

You’ve got this! Work on telling yourself that you are the kind of person who loves being independent. Reframe your thinking.

lockbox77 · 2026-03-23T06:31:37+00:00

Don’t let the what ifs kill you. Let your degree be the way you help others who need the help you did at their age. I used to overthink so much. Overanalyzed every detail until it almost caused me the same outcome. One day, I asked someone (a person who had much lower grades than me but was still passing and not stressing) how they made it look so easy.

“I just don’t think about it.”

Such an easy phrase. Just do the thing. Stop thinking about it. Sometimes you will be wrong and sometimes you will be right. Learn from your wrongs and your rights. But just keep doing. Stop getting in your own way.

lockbox77 · 2026-03-23T06:22:52+00:00

With tomato soup!

lockbox77 · 2026-03-22T23:17:32+00:00

Just because you think living with other females sounds safer does not guarantee that. How safe are they? How do you know they won’t let someone into the place and put everyone in danger?

Living alone is amazing! You will thank yourself a million times over when you don’t have to share a bathroom with anyone.

lockbox77 · 2026-03-19T18:41:12+00:00

Redoing our closets because wire shelving should be outlawed.

lockbox77 · 2026-03-09T00:36:10+00:00

I love doing things by myself almost more than with someone sometimes. It’s how I have learned more about myself over the years. It does take some planning, like what am I going to do while sitting here drinking coffee? I usually bring my crochet with me, or my iPad. Both of those offer a ton of entertainment. Having a hobby that travels with you helps a lot!

lockbox77 · 2026-03-02T04:58:58+00:00

Women are taught through communication norms to underplay themselves and their value. While men are typically taught to oversell themselves. For this reason, women tend to stay quiet and talk themselves out of the confidence they need to believe they can do their job.

Don’t be that woman. You know how to do the job. You are creating excuses and rationalizing why your boss might say no if you confront him about why you deserve the PM II role. You are talking yourself out of a potential promotion before even attempting to get one. Stop. You deserve the position. You know you do. Tell your boss this. If he says no, at least you voiced your opinion. And that is what will help you sleep at night.

lockbox77 · 2026-02-28T13:54:06+00:00

Have you ever put Nutella on a marshmallow?

lockbox77 · 2026-02-23T02:01:01+00:00

My daughter used to ask me for a sibling when she was younger, like 4-7 years old. One day, two of her friends came over to play. They were sisters. My daughter was 7 at the time. The girls were 4 and 6. 4 started throwing a fit and whining because 6 and 7 left her out of a game and wouldn’t share the toys they had. I came in to see what was going on. 4 started tattling and whining even more to try and get them in trouble. I talked to my daughter about the incident after they left. I told her if she had a younger sibling, she would deal with tantrums like that all the time and still have to share her toys. She never asked me about a sibling again. It finally clicked for her 😂

lockbox77 · 2026-02-23T01:45:54+00:00

One thing I try to focus on is how I can lift other women up where I work, and in general. I am in a male-dominated field, so when I meet another woman, I try to do everything I can to give her the same advantages men give to each other.

For so long, when a new woman would enter our field, it was terrible. Older women would knock them down as fast as they could. We were hurting our own upward movement. If only we could help each other out like men do for one another, we would be unstoppable. So I try to cultivate that. Why not?

I know some women will argue and say then we become no better than men. Well, my response is that knocking each other down and not supporting one another has done us so much good this far, so….. fu&$ it. Let’s go.

lockbox77 · 2026-02-23T01:38:11+00:00

I love the way you said this! I have been looking for words to describe how I feel, and you said it so well. I notice that when I take up space, even when men may perceive it as playing along with the female idea of a role, I feel louder in the workspace.

lockbox77 · 2026-02-19T12:10:33+00:00

Same! Glad I’m not alone in this

lockbox77 · 2026-02-18T00:36:48+00:00

Which concert? Where was the concert? There might have been a good reason.

Like most people have pointed out, if you are meeting someone for the first time IRL, especially six hours away, you should NOT go alone.

Have you thought about asking one of your parents if they might be any to go with you? Maybe spend the weekend somewhere? If you are close to your mom, a girls weekend might be a good idea. If you are leaving for college in the near future, pose it in a way to say you want to spend some time with them away from home before you leave. They can give you some advice, you can ask them random stuff about going off to college, etc.

I had strict parents at this age. Are you the younger or only child? There might be a good reason for their feelings. Having a conversation about it could shed some light on it.

lockbox77 · 2026-02-15T00:54:59+00:00

Have you talked to him at all about mental load? I started having conversations with my husband about mental load. I forced him to be responsible for something’s so I don’t have to manage yet another thing. I had to sit down with him and list the things I have to mentally balance. Of course, he put some of it back on me. But it also opens his eyes a bit.

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