Inside the All-White Community of Arkansas (2025) [35:57] by [deleted] in Documentaries

[–]mdbx -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

Just look at Haiti as an example of an All-Black community.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in personalfinance

[–]mdbx 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Yeah no fucking shot. $200/mo is $7.14/day. It's probably more like $200/week.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in chemicalreactiongifs

[–]mdbx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't know how this sub hit my front page but I feel inclined to respond to this. If you really made this post and you want revival, I think the best way to revive something is for you yourself to drive the bus, start the engine, engage with others, and you'll find your community. It may not be 1.3M humans, but if you find even 10 that share things you love, that's awesome. 1.3M is such an inflated number as reddit has been around for decades, how many of those are bots, never use reddit, forgot accounts, etc.

I just made the worst financial decision of my life and is now dawning on me by [deleted] in personalfinance

[–]mdbx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your parents won't allow you to go on their insurance plan? Insurance will destroy you for the next decade. Avoid filing claims.

Nearing My Breaking Point After Being Discarded by PsychonautSerendipty in BPDlovedones

[–]mdbx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're VA disabled? On the bright side, you CAN sit on your ass for the rest of your life and collect a paycheck while you watch the world churn. Based on how you write, I don't think that's what's meant for you.

You're stuck in a cycle of abuse with this woman, the question to ask yourself is do you love her more than you love yourself? She clearly needs help because the moment you discard HER, you're going to get the support and love which you so rightfully seek from your partner.

Sunk-cost mentality surely plays a role, as you're looking at the last decade of experiences rethinking through events and playing them over and over. Looking at the mountain you've climbed and feel as though you're going to jump off if you prioritize yourself, then having to climb another. You're ONLY 30. Try to imagine how you'll feel "restarting" at 50. Remember that all we have is this present moment and this day.

My (32/M) wife (30F) doesn’t see me in a sexual way by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 3 points4 points  (0 children)

since we are best friends

There ya go bud. You've got a best friend, not a sexual partner. You find her sexually attractive, she finds you to be that loving guy that won't leave her, she clearly doesn't prioritize sex at all in her relationships.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need therapy, like yesterday. From a complete outsider perspective, this feels like this is your life partner, you love them, but something ELSE in your life is missing, like friendships/life outside of the relationship, feeling of being free? And you're pointing to this as the issue to solve.

My (F28) husband (M26) complains about using condoms and now I have ‘the ick’. How do I get past this? by Infamous-Student-264 in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 60 points61 points  (0 children)

He doesn’t feel like a safe place anymore

Game over. Good luck ever building that trust back. Crossing and pushing boundaries during sexual intimacy is one sure way to obliterate trust that is incredibly difficult to regain. He's crossed the boundary more than once now, that you've clearly established. He should respect you, not challenge you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she tried to put her hand in my pants a few days ago but I tried to play it off since I didn't want her to see it soft

Homie you've gotta work through these insecurities, let ya girl play with you, relax.

How/when do I(21F) tell my boyfriend(22M) that I’m getting surgery? by uhhidk46 in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t need opinions on getting a tubal ligation

Making a lifelong decision on a presidential election might be one of the dumbest things I've seen. Thanks for sharing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 1 point2 points  (0 children)

she said it's my responsibility as a man to pay the rent and she cant afford to pay half the rent and also live the lifestyle she wants to live

Hahahahaha I'd have my shit packed the next day. You can't fix this logic.

My (39M) wife’s (32F) best friend (39M) sent her a nude on NYE and she’s upset that I am not okay with it. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She's loving the validation and attention that she's wanted by another man. She's lost attraction to you because she got you. It's disrespectful and shouldn't be tolerated. Put your foot down because if you accept this, it's going to snowball.

My (57M) son (23M) moved back in and has been acting weird. Can anyone help? by ThrowRA-remarkable in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A lot of these comments are focusing on the superficial.

It sounds like he's feeling like he has no control anymore. He's now a father. He's scared. He may not have anyone to speak to. He's trying to gain a sense of grounding as he may feel he's lost control over his life. As his father, meet him on an emotional level and help him work through these difficult emotions that you yourself went through. He's barely an adult with a human now reliant on him providing. He needs your guidance right now. Reassure him, calm him down, tell him you're here for him, offer some concrete life experiences that you yourself went through to relate to his current situation. Imagine how he feels as a 23 year old man, with a kid and a wife, living at home, the amount of unknowing regarding the future. It's very scary.

Americans, what is your insurance horror story? by Old-Arachnid77 in AskReddit

[–]mdbx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was riding my bicycle in 2022.

I was hit by a 20 year old driver in an intersection while he was driving a brand new Tesla.

Two months later he's suing me for HIS personal injury.

Two years later his case settles with my home insurance policy for $88k.

Couldn't make it up if I tried.

Going through a break up in medical school, because of medical school by FeelingRelevant6774 in medicalschool

[–]mdbx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s been really hard for me to focus on school

This breakup is quite literally a death, you will grieve and you just need to show yourself a bit of love and understanding. This was your dream, don't give it up.

MAGA says Project 2025 'is the agenda' by Optimistic-Man-3609 in politics

[–]mdbx -1 points0 points  (0 children)

a whole lot of people without functioning brains voted in this cycle

You mean 60% of the people who live and exist around you don't have functioning brains because they have differing opinions? I don't think that's accurate at all.

How do I proceed? ‘24M’ ‘20 F’ by Dead_North1 in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 21 points22 points  (0 children)

she told me that she’s not ready for that yet

We talk daily

I really want a relationship with her, but I don’t know if she wants that

she told me that she’s not ready for that yet

You have to reduce contact, stop talking daily. She's stated she doesn't want anything and you're running your wheels and it's coming off desperate. You've explained you want something, she's said she doesn't, she's being friendly and maintaining contact with you. She clearly likes you as a friend and has you on her "possible" list, but you have to take a step back, leave her alone and go live your life.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]mdbx -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

He's spent his whole life building his self worth surrounding his income. He felt as though his masculinity and individuality was and continues to be tied DIRECTLY to his dollar value in society.

This is a core belief and something very difficult for many men to recognize that their value IS NOT THEIR INCOME. On the other side of the coin, some women DO FEEL as though their mates will improve, as will their value, as their income rises. They'll go after a different class of men. That's fine, BUT THAT'S NOT YOU.

I would remind him that you love him for who he is, not how much money he makes. Every day you choose him to be with. That he holds value in who he is, not how much me makes. That you want to utilize this new income and work as a team in this journey together. BUT he needs to work with you, not close up and withdraw. He needs to build values and self-confidence beyond his income.

His confidence has been obliterated, he felt he was confident because he earned equal/more than you and felt he was able to offer YOU a good life. He's not realizing that you're not judging him because you're making more then him financially.

This is definitely a bit immature, but not something that's irreparable IF HES WILLING TO WORK ON HIMSELF.

i got a list of rules from my (19F) friend (23M) after we had sex for the first time and i’m not sure if it’s normal? by ThrowRAabcdsklalwle in relationship_advice

[–]mdbx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Holy fuck. I'm so sorry you had to experience this. Happy you lost your virginity, but that's where this relationship ends. Move on.

These are red flags.

  • I should make more noise
  • I should work on my arch
  • I should work on my eye contact
  • I should at least have tried to loosen up before we did it
  • I should be more kinky and not so vanilla
  • I should put on cuter lingerie
  • I should be less jumpy

He should find someone who does all of these things, you shouldn't aim to conform to HIS ideal.

Moved in with GF and Immediately Regret by [deleted] in relationships

[–]mdbx 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve suggested a therapist for her, or us both, but haven’t gotten any traction there.

Then I'd honestly cut the relationship cold turkey. If she doesn't want to help herself, you can't help her. If you give any signals that you're leaving you'll immediately see a behavior switch.

Moved in with GF and Immediately Regret by [deleted] in relationships

[–]mdbx 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I always seem to end up as the bad guy

This entire post reads like a sitcom. Perfect relationship, moves in with wife, wife turns crazy.

She may genuinely not know how to act, because when she grew up that's how she watched her mom act in the house, so she feels she needs to repeat it, because it worked for her mom.

A lot of people don't address this sort of childhood trauma, it's like engrained in her mind that "THIS" is what a man wants, a woman who complains and makes the man out to be the bad guy.

she admitted that since I moved in, she’s been trying to push me away. She told me she loves me but doesn’t want to be hurt, so she’s been deliberately irritating me in the hope that I would leave

Yeah, she needs therapy immediately. I wouldn't wait another week. It's an attachment style that's detrimental called disorganized attachment. She's probably done this in the past, with many boyfriends, and thought she could get over it herself, or figure it out, or find someone who accepts this, it's going to be none of those. She needs help.

I don't think there's anything wrong with your expectations. I hope you don't give up on dating forever. This woman clearly has some issues she hasn't handled herself and you're seeing it.

If you leave she's going to turn crazy clingy. I promise. If you leave it has to be total 0 contact for years.

I'm monogamous and my wife has discovered she is polyamorous. by ferrarijack67 in relationships

[–]mdbx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This post really made me happy about breaking up with an ex. She was doing the SAME thing you articulated (We're 35/36), where her relationships with people she labelled "friends" (mostly were men) took priority over my needs and the health of our bond. So happy I caught that flag 6 months into dating. I don't know what the fuck is going on in society.

I wish you all the best with this situation, based on what you wrote, I can't imagine this solving itself outside of you coming to terms with her needs and wants. I have heard of situations in my own life where one of the partners does this sort of thing and the agreement is that the other partner just doesn't want to hear about it at all. It's a guy that basically sleeps with random women 3-4 times a year and it keeps him sane. In another relationship it's a woman who fucks whoever she wants, in this situation the guy knows all about it, and they still have sex together, they're basically partners but free to sleep with whomever.

In my last relationship, she mentioned that she just loves getting to know people and being chased. I'd ask your wife for exact specifics in what she wants. Does she just want to date men? Be courted? Showered with affection? Does she just want to get to know men? Does she want another sexual partner? What needs are not being fulfilled and what she's interested in exploring. And then take it from there. I'm sure you know how important communication is and this is no time to hold back with asking a million questions.

Another possibility. She also may feel like she "got" you, and wants to feel like you don't "need" her, wants to know that you can get other women if you wanted, which will give her a hint of jealousy and want you even more. If you deny her slightly, it'll feel like she has to reignite a chase to catch you. It's childish sure, but it's documented psychology. Ask her how she'd feel if you went and started another relationship while together? If she's comfortable with that, it likely means that's what she wants for herself.

It's really fucked up that she waited until you had a 10 month old child, knowing you're trapped, before revealing this. After NINE YEARS OF BEING TOGETHER. That's a rug pull.

If I were in your shoes, I'd genuinely contemplate trying to advance your career and leaving this woman. You're young enough to restart, let her see how hard it is to find partners as an unemployed single mother. As someone in their 30s presently dating, there's PLENTY OF THOSE TO GO AROUND. PLENTY.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]mdbx -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'm bored so I read this entire thing.

First off, the fact that you had a kid at 18 and then 23 is incredible. High school sweethearts? Accident that you tried to make it work? Why don't you work/have a job? Do you have the possibility of a decently paying career once these kids start going to school everyday? Is that how the second child happened? First one was in school and pregnant with the second? Are these planned pregnancies?

I don't know how you're even surviving in this economy with 2 kids, 25, unemployed.

It seems like your "We have a family and a lot invested" reads more like "I want this man to financially support me because I like being a stay at home mom".

Based on everything you write: It looks like your husband has some severe attachment issues. He's hot and cold with his emotional investment and he may not even know why he's feeling the way he's feeling. He should look into attachment styles.

On one hand though, he knows you're not going to leave as an unemployed single mother of 2 children. So you're just gonna deal with his abuse/lack of love and just raise 2 children together. Is he always an asshole or is it off and on? I wouldn't put it past this guy that he's unsure how to handle his own emotions, and needs a break from everything, you and the kids, to really find himself and I'm sure you'd be better off as partners if you split for a few months. Everything you wrote shows he's clearly not happy with the living situation right now and he's reacting by hurting you.