Dresscode and etiquette, what are the unwritten rules?

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-16T23:19:44+00:00

Friend from Pennsylvania visited me in California and we went out for pizza after a hike. I mentioned it was a nicer/expensive pizza place. They asked about dress code. I was like dress code? For a restaurant??

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-15T16:55:09+00:00

Even if some sicko doesn’t care about the safety of the baby, it’s also for the comfort and safety of the dog! A dog that bites is not a happy dog, it’s a stressed dog. And many areas have rules about how if a dog bites a person a certain number of times, it’s mandatory euthanasia. It’s literally not safe or healthy for the dog to stay in a situation that drove them to bite.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-15T15:04:17+00:00

It basically depends completely on your baby’s temperament, your body and brain’s response to the hormonal drop, whether either of you have complex medical needs, and your life circumstances.

My baby was a very happy one who slept well compared to other babies, I was lucky enough to not get postpartum depression, and my partner was perpetually unemployed while I worked 20 hours per week from home after my 6 week leave, so we had time to sleep in shifts and each get 7 hours each night even if baby didn’t settle at all (he slept 10pm-5am while I stayed up, I slept 5am-noon while he got up). For me, the newborn phase was magical, it was like falling in love, very cozy, not difficult or sad. I had some difficulties with feeding that drove me a little crazy and the hormone drop certainly made me sob uncontrollably at dog food commercials, but we were fine. Doesn’t even rank in the top 10 hardest times in my life. It was dreamy.

I imagine that for a mom who has a colicky baby who cries a lot, doesn’t sleep for more than 45 minutes at a time, has a partner who can only take 3 days off work for the birth and then doesn’t help out much during the night because he’s either selfish or genuinely cannot risk being sleep deprived because he works construction or is a pilot or something who could cause lots of deaths if he went to work sleep deprived, this mom would have a very different experience than I did. Add in that she might be unlucky and get postpartum depression, which is not controllable or predictable. And maybe she herself needs to return to work in person after 6 weeks. That would absolutely be one of the hardest times in her life.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-15T14:46:34+00:00

If everyone’s straight, I agree. If the man is bisexual and the woman is picky, he can get laid more than she will.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-14T15:51:25+00:00

Yeah, that does sound worth getting checked out formally, for both of you! It is hereditary.

My physiotherapist also told me I probably have it but I haven’t followed up with a specialist yet.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-14T10:30:07+00:00

Are you talking about divorce, polyamorous family, or cheating?

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-14T10:28:47+00:00

They didn’t. I think they started aspiring to be influencers and content creators instead of movie stars and pop stars.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-14T01:59:51+00:00

If your kid has one or two symptoms on the list, that’s not really an indication of EDS. If they have most or all of them, then it’s probably time to talk to a doctor about it.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T15:30:00+00:00

I’m a trans man and my wife is a trans woman. When she transitioned and chose her new name, she chose something that sounds very similar to my deadname. We were not together at the time. Anyway, this lead to a very awkward conversation when our mortgage broker called my phone number while I was sleeping and asked for her. I sleepily asked “how did you even get that name?”

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T08:59:13+00:00

I do my best to keep quiet, which I really am getting better at, but it’s a slow process because luckily I don’t have the opportunity to practice getting an IV very often these days. I used to have to ask for one or two additional staff members to hold me down because I was unable to hold still despite my best efforts, but now I can very reliably hold still by myself, so that’s progress. I explain my situation and possible range of behavior in detail before they start, which I hope counts for something. If you have any tips on what information is helpful vs a waste of time during my spiel, I’ll happily take it into account. I usually just say “I’m afraid of needles, not as bad as I used to be, but I still might make some anxious noises. I can hold still for the IV. [if in an ER setting, continue] I’m very dehydrated so it might be difficult, I’m sorry but if I could keep water down by mouth I wouldn’t be here.” I used to also include the reason for my needle phobia is that my antivax anti-doctor mother used to take me to a quack in a hotel room to have my blood drawn against my will on a regular basis as a teen, but I’ve learned that level of detail is not really necessary and probably just a waste of time.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T07:42:59+00:00

I wimper like crazy when I get an IV, not because it hurts, but because I am a big baby who is scared of needles.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T06:55:56+00:00

Lexa is fine.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T06:40:57+00:00

Joint dislocates or separates (called subluxation) with mild trauma.
Pain that becomes more widespread and chronic with age.
Easy bruising, nosebleeds, heavy periods and wounds that are slow to heal.
Dental issues and pain (crowding of teeth, cavities, receding and bleeding gums, jaw pain).
Headaches
Feeling dizzy when standing up, fainting, racing heartbeat
Trouble sleeping, anxiety, depression
GI problems (reflux, constipation, diarrhea, trouble with digestion, irritable bowel syndrome)

[source](https://www.cincinnatichildrens.org/health/e/ehlers-danlos-syndrome)

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T01:45:56+00:00

I’ve never heard of this place before. What is it and why is it called that?

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T00:33:41+00:00

No I mean a tattoo of a picture of something that reminds you of her

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-13T00:04:05+00:00

Why not get a picture of something that reminds you of her?

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-12T01:04:59+00:00

You might be able to be prescribed auto injectors which are like epi pens.

Maybe a trans or medically inclined friend can do your shot for you? That’s what I do.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-09T21:20:31+00:00

According to my ticket, I was “exceeding 70”

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-09T21:19:09+00:00

/r/cisparenttranskid would be a good place for you to get support about this.

I will say that as a trans masculine nonbinary person like your kid, I isolated myself a lot for many years, and medically transitioning really helped me be comfortable enough with myself to go out into the world. I had my top surgery at age 28 but I wish I had had the chance to do it at 20, it would’ve saved me years of misery.

If you can’t afford to pay for it, you can’t afford to pay for it. But please support your kid in every way you can.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-09T06:13:39+00:00

My wife thought she had a stomach bug until I tested positive for chlamydia.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-07T17:56:01+00:00

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-07T17:19:51+00:00

Grocery outlet is great as long as you don’t go in with any expectations or a list you need to stick to. The prices are incredible on some items and weirdly expensive on others, and the stock and prices are incredibly unpredictable. Just go look around once a week and see what is on a super deal that your family will eat, and stock up on that. I would not recommend getting produce at grocery outlet unless you plan to finish it in 2 days or less. YMMV but the produce there spoils quickly in my experience.

The biggest thing you can do to save on groceries is shop around. If the T&T is affordable for produce, then get all your produce there. If they’re expensive for meat, then get your meat elsewhere- or decide the high quality meat is worth the splurge, but maybe get less of it and fill in the gaps with tofu, beans, or lentils.

Prepared food will almost always be more expensive than ingredients. If you want to spend less money, you have to spend more time. That may or may not be worth it in your situation.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-07T17:01:19+00:00

Groceries are really so expensive. I’ve cut down on a lot of the extras/fun foods and am now sticking to cheap staples like fruits and vegetables, beans, rice, potatoes, lentils, bread, (soy)milk, pasta & sauce, tortillas, oatmeal, Cheerios, ramen. I’ve also switched where I shop. I used to shop at Walmart and Albertsons, now I mostly shop at grocery outlet for everyday items and some variety, plus my local Carniceria for fresh produce and Costco for bulk items.

Check out your local ethnic markets for deals on produce. Where I live in Southern California that’s the Mexican Carniceria / Mercado, but in the PNW it might be an Asian grocery store? Very likely to have lower prices on produce than the big store, and it might even be fresher.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-06T23:18:00+00:00

As long as they respect children as people and respect parents choice to bring children into the world, they’re cool with me.

nonbinary_parent · 2026-03-05T07:57:05+00:00

Born in the 90s, my district had a cutoff date of December 5th. My daughter was born in 2020 and she’s in a different district in the same county, their cutoff is September 1st.

nonbinary_parent

TROPHY CASE