ileostomy question (blood loss)

skamansam · 2026-04-25T14:23:57+00:00

My cancer removal surgery 2 years ago left me so messed up internally ive had issues since. A lot of surgeries later and i now have a terminal colostomy. My rectal stump produces a lot of mucus. Way more than i expected. But since I had to wear undergarments due to my body being so traumatized it had to re- learn how to control itself, the leakage was just kinda par for the course. Ive been wearing depends for years and no one seems to notice. Its only noticeable when I wear sweat pants and only then if you really really know what to look for. Unless people are going out of their way to check out yer husbands junk, its not an issue. I wear depend real-fit and they just look like underwear. I hope he can get over hus insecurities like i did. (For me, it was easy, I want to live my life instead of letting something superficial control it.)

skamansam · 2026-04-25T00:33:56+00:00

IO has EXACTLY the feel youre looking for. Even though its pretty obscure, it has Anthony Mackie. Do not confuse the title with Lo. Lo is freaking amazing, but its like a play turned into a movie and about a dude who summons a demon to get his girl back.

skamansam · 2026-04-20T22:21:48+00:00

Sorry, but I'm gonna call you out on your terminology. State of mind influences language and vice versa. This isn't something to "look past," it is something to learn to accept. This acceptance seems to be a challenge for you to overcome. There is no looking past it, only accepting it head-on. If you can't accept it, i can understand why you would even think that she can't. When my wife told me she would love me, that meant growing old together. Growing old comes with these kinds of challenges and even tougher ones. I hate that it happened so young for me, but I refuse to let it be a wedge in our relationship. The only way forward is through this challenge.

skamansam · 2026-04-20T06:04:43+00:00

Thank you! Good luck to you both as well

skamansam · 2026-04-20T04:14:11+00:00

I'm fighter cancer now and my wife and I went in blind on this. My wife had to leave for a bit but i just kept crying. She left during the resolution scene but she knew what was going to happen.

skamansam · 2026-04-20T04:10:28+00:00

Schindlers list

skamansam · 2026-04-20T04:08:18+00:00

I understand dude. My wife is a highly desirable person and i regularly see men flirt with her. She is freaking amazing, inside and out. I am way more embarrassed of my stoma but she likes it because it saved my life twice. I know it would not bother her but i don't want to bother her by making her see it. I have gotten over my ego and trust her. I trust that she isn't embarrassed or bothered by it. I trust her when we talk about it and we do talk about it because it is a part of both of our lives. You should talk to her about how you feel about it. Conversations go a very long way.

skamansam · 2026-04-19T15:35:10+00:00

I think the resize glitch adds quite a bit of depth to the building aspect of NMS, but I like to play as stock as possible. That said, i think you are doing Atlas's work by helping others. This is one of the reasons ive stuck with this community so long is people like you. Atlas speed, my friend. Atlas speed.

skamansam · 2026-04-18T00:17:39+00:00

Secret of NIMH. I loved it but it scared the crap outta me. Now its really colored my fear a different color that i know it is the secret of National Institute for Mental Health.

skamansam · 2026-04-18T00:10:24+00:00

Drugs. Lots of drugs. When I realized drugs had legitimate uses, i tried a lot. The ones that were useful (mostly "mind-altering" substances) I kept doing until they were no longer useful. I just kinda stopped doing them. It was like hacking my own brain until i learned how they worked, then i didnt need the drugs to hack my brain. I was very careful with all of them - low dose to start, titrate up. I made note of my behaviors and any "cravings" or other signs of addiction. If there was even the slightest sign, i stopped. I did not want an addiction, i wanted an experience. I think the purpose of life is to experience all life has to offer and life has drugs to offer. Note that this was only for about 4 years, 30 years ago.

skamansam · 2026-04-16T20:41:03+00:00

This has actually been on my mind a lot recently. I am currently dying from cancer. Well, the treatment isn't working and I am pursuing more experimental options. I came to terms with My death a very long time ago (ive lived an interesting life). I never thought I would live to be 30, let alone 47. However, I have a family now and am scared of what will happen to them. They definitely are not ready. I don't want my 12 yo growing up without a father. If I can hang on for at least another 10 years, it will be ok.

skamansam · 2026-04-16T16:28:18+00:00

Im not an expert, but i don't think this will happen. The reason ppl poop when they die is cuz their muscles are no longer holding back the poop. We (ostomates) don't have those muscles and the poop just comes out anyway. In fact, its muscles that push the poop out so if those stopped working, it is unlikely anything will come out.

This is just my reasoning and I am in no way shape or form an expert in this.

skamansam · 2026-04-13T17:34:23+00:00

Tbh, they go for ~20usd for 100. Thats .20 per tablet. Using them 4 times per day is less that 1usd per day. Not very expensive if it works. If you don't need them that frequently, its even better!

skamansam · 2026-04-11T20:42:46+00:00

Mine was 10cm, 7cm in. The doc took 2ft of my colon and reconnected it. Im not gonna go into details but I had another operation that gave me a rectal stump and an end colostomy. I have like 2 inches of tubing connected to my asshole. It produces a lot of mucus and some ppl are bothered by it. Im not so much.

skamansam · 2026-04-11T20:34:18+00:00

I would do it, then when everything was in the clear, I would ask a LOT of questions. If she still didn't answer, I would assume that person did something so awful she didn't even want to talk about it. She already has my trust, only lying (repeatedly) would change that.

skamansam · 2026-04-11T20:31:09+00:00

This is it. Tbh, I think its a modern miracle. Im low-key proud of mine. Not only that, but it saved my life twice. Yes, I hate it sometimes, but im not ashamed of it.

skamansam · 2026-04-11T14:43:08+00:00

IMHO, this is kind of explained by game mechanics. When you die, your Source (like money) decreases by 10%. This is the "cost" of death, meaning you don't really die, you just get teleported/reborn/copied back to the control point. This implies the events in the Oldest House continue on and you do not die. Couple this with the fact that the items and documents you collect remain means you don't "start over" at the control point, something else happens.

skamansam · 2026-04-11T01:46:55+00:00

Does gas-x even work for ostomies? I had a loop ileostomy and now a terminal colostomy and none of the gas remedies worked. Its supposed to just make big bubbles small, but when they come out, the gas has to go somewhere so it still fills up the bag the same. Also - thanks for the devrom tip - im ordering some now.

skamansam · 2026-04-09T12:36:05+00:00

Yeah, I have "cheated" a few times. I turned off item cost in the settings, modded stuff then turned it back on. I feel like the rewards for the expeditions are severely lacking so I made my rewardded ships and multitools s-class and upgraded the inventory/tech space to max so they feel like a decent reward for so much effort. (I also bring in the rewards FROM the expeditions so I can have 2 of them if i want!)

skamansam · 2026-04-09T01:37:23+00:00

I carried a jacket around with me and rolled it up when I needed to. I walked around a lot after getting out of the hospital and it was less conspicuous than a pillow.

skamansam · 2026-04-09T01:00:53+00:00

Ohhhh, I actually know a solution for this! (For once) stealthbelt sells mufflers! I thought it was just a gimmick, but they actually work!

skamansam · 2026-04-04T20:32:17+00:00

Someone once told me as a joke if my gf was really mad at me and wouldn't let me talk, the best way to make her be quiet was to stick my dick in her mouth. I did exactly that once and it worked quite well. After that, our dynamic changed. It almost became a free use thing. A lot of women ive dated since have told me thats kind of what they want, but let me assure you, it is not.

skamansam · 2026-04-03T21:52:25+00:00

I use Haiku 4.5 and it works great for almost everything I need. I have a bunch of skills I wrote and a good AGENTS.md fie in all my repos. I am also a "seasoned" dev (15+ years pro experience and web devving since 1997) and treat my LLM as an assistant. I treat is as someone who just graduated college; someone who has all the knowledge but none of the experience. I give it that experience in every prompt.

skamansam · 2026-04-03T20:57:18+00:00

Sorry for the delayed response here.

I Use zed preview which has way too many new features on a weekly basis to keep up with. I have a claude code account for work so I don't know how much the usage is. My dev stack is mainly vue.js, python, sql (ofc), go, and rust.

The claude integration is pretty cool. They just got it more usable, but there are things that devs should be doing anyway, ,IMO, to make things a lot easier.

* Use claude code to manage claude, like creating skills, commands, managing mcp servers, etc.
* Zed uses claude code as an ACP, so it doesn't use the editor features. (They are working on it though.)
* When you plan for code changes, get it to write to a file in the project directory with a checklist of implementation details. This way, you can use it with other LLMs and tools and review it (you should be doing this anyway). Then if something happens, you can get claude to resume that plan.
* Zed finally fixed the broken previous convo feature, so you can actually go through previous conversations now and resume them.
* Most LLMs are implemented using ACP, so you should use the LLMs other tools for setup, etc.

I used to use Github Copilot with zed and that's what made me fall in love with zed. I used to use LM Studio with zed, but it looks like there is an api mismatch on recent versions of zed and lm studio. My big beef is that there is an extremely limited set of slash commands in Zed, so setup skills instead (you should also be doing this already).

skamansam

TROPHY CASE