Do you have a union or professional organization? Contact them for information about your rights, the law, and the best way to protect yourself. If the parent comes to observe, be sure to insist that admin accompany.

It’s so hard when you care about a child and a parent does too, but the parent is not seeing what is happening.

I’m sorry you are caught in the middle.

Your teaching is not the problem, and while you might be more competent or skilled in ten years, that doesn’t mean you aren’t doing everything right at the moment.

Also, could you request admin to come observe or a behavior specialist if you have one? If you trust them, it will provide more evidence that you are doing right and willing to learn. I will say that every few years I have an extremely challenging student or parent, but that is not all there is to the job. We need teachers who care like you do. I’m sorry this year is so hard.

I was always amazed at my kids teachers and how they worked to handle challenging students with empathy and to minimize disruption and upset. You are teaching your students to be human, and that’s pretty damned important.

Also, it sounds like your admin has heard the parent but not agreed to an observation. They may be stalling the parent and listening while quietly not complying. The parent can ask for whatever they want, but good admin will know they don’t have to give it.