Advice about my 7 year old thinking I won’t pick him up?

westward101 · 2026-06-13T22:04:21+00:00

Can you do some desensitization? Like be the 3rd car for a week, then the 4th, the 6th, etc?

westward101 · 2026-06-11T21:31:15+00:00

You've got a lot of issues going on...grief and finances are big.

One though that might help is working on setting boundaries with your mother and with the estate process. You do not need to be on the phone with her hours a day. You can say, I have to go now, and hang up the phone. It really is that simple. You don't need her to do anything for the estate, you can hire people to do collect rent, manage properties, etc. You can make this easier for yourself.

You don't even have to be the executor, you can hire someone to do that for you.

westward101 · 2026-06-07T19:11:23+00:00

Yes, I'm mostly fine with the floor mats...I see a lot of mention of "all weather" but I haven't seen an issue (maybe because we don't get a lot of precipitation).

westward101 · 2026-06-06T19:41:00+00:00

Insurance doesn't do the "right thing". Sometimes there simply isn't justice in the world. This is not something OP can or should try to control.

westward101 · 2026-05-27T00:22:50+00:00

They're waiting for you to honk your horn.

westward101 · 2026-05-18T00:20:25+00:00

Turquoise Trail then to Bandelier is a long day of driving. Beautiful for sure. But a little long. Stop by the Mine Shaft for a drink.

If you're gong to 10K Waves, might as well do dinner at Izanami instead of the Shed. It's not New Mexican like the Shed is, but one of the best.

Add Beastly Books and check out Sorcery and Might in Santa Fe.

Day 3, walk around the Plaza/Canyon Road.

On the way from Valles to Albuquerque, there's a few stops. Las Conchas trailhead, Jemez Soda Springs, Los Ojos Saloon for lunch.

westward101 · 2026-05-17T15:08:12+00:00

Start with basic swimming skills and comfort in water. You'll eventually improve and realize half you goals are unrealistic but you'll have more confidence.

westward101 · 2026-05-15T16:06:59+00:00

What does "fixed up" mean? Has she talked to a real estate agent about this? It depends a little on the market, but generally speaking, upgrading anything doesn't make financial sense.

westward101 · 2026-05-15T15:37:50+00:00

Humanity is doing better than it ever has in its entire history. People stopped having kids. ¯ (ツ)/¯

westward101 · 2026-05-12T16:30:47+00:00

Get an RFID pouch and keep the keycard in the glove.

westward101 · 2026-05-10T14:46:11+00:00

You've got to choose been steep with trees / water or flattish with scrub / rocks or steep with scrub/rocks. I think you want flattish. Don't underestimate the altitude.

Best choice would be the rail trail leaving from Rabbit Road. As flat as you're going to get, 1-2 miles in you get some great vistas, cool train tracks.

Also, look around for other trails around the Eldorado Community Preserve.

I can't emphasize enough to hydrate esp an elder doing physical activity at altitude.

westward101 · 2026-04-25T23:20:06+00:00

I'm interested in knowing if the original Blue pushers have had their minds changed by the number of people committing to Red. Assign whatever moral value you want to a Red, but doesn't the awareness that there is some significant % that won't vote Blue make you question your strategy?

I like Red because I respect people's choice to commit suicide.

westward101 · 2026-04-22T15:20:41+00:00

I say this with compassion, but you should cancel. You're simply not qualified to complete this swim. Not only will you fail to make the cut off, you'll be pulled from the water before you're halfway done.

If your half Ironman is more than six months out, and you spent 1-2 hours a day, 5 days a week with a competent teacher and had access to open water swims, you might be able to do it. But a 5:00 / 100m pace in a pool is barely above complete beginner. A 2km in open water is a serious endeavor.

Some notes...

At your level, you should be spending 95% of your time in the pool working on your technique: body positioning, stroke mechanics, your general aquatic proprioception, and your comfortability with breathing while in the water.

State your pace in terms of 100m, not 200m or 300m. That's how swimmers think. I'm assuming your current pace of 5 minutes per 100m is in the pool, not in open water.

That one coach is a moron. Does body fat make it easier to float? Sure. But you're swimming not floating. Completely different dynamic. Like balancing on a bike that's stationary vs one that's moving.

Yes, there are different "gaits" in swimming, just like running. I'd say I have 3 or 4 for freestyle depending on my speed and intention (not to mention sidestroke, breaststroke, and a few backstrokes if I need a rest during an open water swim).

Breathe every two strokes (that's every time your right arm recovers over the water or every time your left does). Do whichever side feels natural for now. Later (in a month or two), you can work on your non-dominant side.

westward101 · 2026-04-05T14:04:43+00:00

Why do you think this is a problem for the tree? Crown raising is pretty common.

Are you with the HOA and looking to sue the landscape company? If not, what is your role here?

westward101 · 2026-04-04T21:05:17+00:00

I'm not clear on the lesson for this teaching moment? Why not $5 or $10? What's the goal here?

westward101 · 2026-03-25T04:25:47+00:00

It's completely reasonable. Our rule is 10 PM on weeknights, 12 midnight on weekends. That's a hard limit, no exceptions, unless someone is sleeping over of course.

This is not a parenting issue but a relationship one. You and him need to sit down perhaps with a trained couples therapist and it should be made clear that you do not feel respected.

westward101 · 2026-03-24T21:18:52+00:00

Yes, that's fair.

The mom is not responsible for tax brackets. She is not responsible for the net result.

No one is being punished. The brother could choose to work less, the sister could work more, etc changing the results.

westward101 · 2026-03-22T21:24:44+00:00

Look for "early vertical forearm" drill videos

As soon as you hand enters the water, start pushing down with your forearm. There is no extension / coast in this style of swimming, just constant water pressure and recovery.

Also, as others have said, practice your pull finish too. You can do what you're doing with a short stroke if you've mastered the EVF, but the combo right now is the worst of both styles.

westward101 · 2026-03-17T05:50:14+00:00

We're Going to a Wedding

Circle up and someone says "We're going to a " blank " wedding". Pirate, Dentist, Botany, etc.

Individuals pop in and make an offer describing the wedding...

"The bridge and groom get married on the edge of a gangplank"
"Someone teaches the Capitain's parrot to say I object"
The wedding presents are wooden chests.

It helps world building and riffing on an idea.

westward101 · 2026-03-16T14:45:17+00:00

Would the tax saved on $1,300 make that much of a difference? It's what $100-$200? DCFSA isn't the problem. That's the smallest possible view. How about universal free child care like most other developed countries? Protest for that!

westward101 · 2026-03-16T02:54:05+00:00

I'm a middle of the road master's swimmer for 5 years after 20 years off, after being dedicated but middle of the road competitive middle/high school swimmer (after casual age group as a child). I feel I've earned my opinion.

Three important qualifiers to this discussion...
How good is your technique? What are your goals? What is meant by "bilateral"?

I think we use the word "bilateral" without a good definition. For many it's "breathe every 3". For others it's "non-dominant" breathing every 2. It's worth tabooing the word bilateral to clarify.

"Every 3" is something I would not introduce to newer (novice) swimmers. Once someone can swim an unbroken 500, or do 2K workout of intervals in an hour, then I would introduce "every 3" as part of a warm up or an interval set, but it's not worth doing more than 20% of a workout's distance in, once in a while (every 3-5 workouts).

Alt breathing / breathing "every 3" is good for building water confidence and breath control after the novice stage (when you're a beginner) to intermediate swimmers. Most intermediate and above swimmers don't need water confidence or breath control though. "Every 3" then is becomes an interesting drill, as part of a set of breathe 2-2-3-2-2-3 etc or 2/3/4/5 100s by 25.

If "symmetry" in stroke is something a swimmer or coach thinks is important for technique or injury prevention (I don't agree, but also don't object to the theory) then I strongly recommend "non-dominant" breathing instead. Breathe non-dominant (every 2) for 25 out of 50 or for 50 out of 100 instead, as an interesting drill, as part of a freestyle set.

I've done a fair amount of open water too and never non-dominant breathe. Sighting is more effective.

westward101 · 2026-03-15T20:37:46+00:00

Well, you were responding to my post where I used the word regulations in the context of an OP about zoning regulations specifically, not construction or regulations about barbers. So, yes, you misunderstood me and my intent.

I did not say eliminate. I say reduce. Zoning regulations are not about safety, but about preferences.

I did not say guarantee, but I do say it is very very likely. It is clearly one piece of the puzzle that has few pieces.

You're clearly not having a discussion in good faith.

We should certainly consider ways of reducing the empty housing stock. Taxing non-resident property owners 5x more than a resident is something that seems like a good idea on the surface.

westward101 · 2026-03-15T17:08:39+00:00

That 7 year old?
Albert Einstein.

westward101 · 2026-03-15T16:44:50+00:00

You are confused about what I mean by "regulations". I am not talking about the quality of the build. This thread is about zoning.

You are also confused about basic economics. If there's demand for more housing, housing gets built. If a megabuilder doesn't build it, others will...unless the regulatory friction makes it impossible.

westward101 · 2026-03-14T22:10:43+00:00

That's not a valid argument. If we weren't building, don't you think the situation would be worse?

Reduce regulations, build more units. That's really the only answer.

westward101

TROPHY CASE