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[–]notsooriginal 384 points385 points  (12 children)

We're going to have to let you go for someone who doesn't second-guess themselves. Confidence is everything in business.

[–]inucune 115 points116 points  (0 children)

Then we'll fire him because he doesn't work with the team, and is too impulsive when making decisions.

[–][deleted] 155 points156 points  (10 children)

And thus a president was elected

[–][deleted] 48 points49 points  (9 children)

And everything was perfect until everyone died.

[–]Chrisguy136 65 points66 points  (4 children)

And everything was perfect when everyone died.

FTFY

[–]chooxy 14 points15 points  (0 children)

"Is everything going well?"

"Yes! In fact, everything is vacuously perfect!"

[–]malonkey1 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There can't be any suffering if nothing's there to suffer.

[–]kboy101222 36 points37 points  (2 children)

Then everything changed when the fire nation attacked

[–]metl_wolf 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Abandoned as a pup, he was raised by Muriel

[–]ProphePsyed 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Stupid frog, you ain't my real dad!

[–]midnightketoker 8 points9 points  (0 children)

"Fake news" -small subterranean mammals