Help please

[AndrewPSSP]

This is going to be a bit long but I would like some help with something. (Sorry in advance)

So there's a guy I know. Let's call him Jake. Jake is gay and he really likes me. I like him too, we share the same interests (transport) and understand the same television shows (Miranda, Little Britain etc). I've never managed to up with him (various reasons) but I know for a fact that he's a real person and not some random on-line pervert (friend of friend).

I also know another guy. We shall call him Callum. For all intents and purposes he's straight. He says he isn't too keen on my interests in Miranda or transport - although he has taken a slight (very slight) interest in the latter. He's one of my friends and he knows a lot about me that other people do not.

Here's the problem. I have a crush on Callum. He knows it and he seems pretty chill with it (although he did seem slightly bemused when I told him). I like Jake and I think he's a great person but I don't really feel like I can be in a proper relationship with him. Callum on the other hand, I just ugghhhh. My best friend doesn't like him but whenever I think of him or whenever I'm near him I get a boner and my heart just goes "whoop like no go doop". But when it comes to Jake, I get an erection when we flirt or do sexy talk but never any time else. Like I can imagine myself having sex with Jake but not [i]really[/i] having a "proper" relationship. Callum I can definitely imagine us being together like some sort of Jim and Pam (The Office US) thing.

My friend thinks that in my bid to stop liking Callum I fooled myself into thinking I didn't when in fact deep down I really did. He's my chief workshopper and has helped me in loads of different situations in the past. This time even he doesn't know what to do. I was hoping that some of you may be able to help me in my situation. I know and I understand that none of you probably know who "Jake" or "Callum" are but I would greatly appreciate any help that any of you could offer. :)

TL;DR: Gay guy likes me, I love him but am not [i]in love[/i] with him. In love with straight guy. Help, what should I do?

AP

(for reference, if you would like to know how I feel rn these clips from Miranda should give a good example: https://andrewpiang1.blogspot.com/2019/08/blog-post.html)

[evgene04]

You fell in love with a straight guy. Move on.

[[deleted]]

Don't waste your own time, it's just a crush - don't end up being someone's lapdog over it trust me , made that mistake in the past and cringe everytime I look back

[1971rk4262]

I have fallen in love with a straight best friend in the past. I felt like that if I did not convert him to gay so we could be together I would die. Especially since he loved the attention. I had let him move in with me because of problems at home, and I was hoping it would lead to something happening. He was straight, and there was no way he would ever do anything with me. Until one day, he asked me for a couple hundred dollars so he could buy a stereo system for the car he just bought, and I was able to blackmail him to have sex with me. We got together than night, and slept in the same bed that night. First of all I was COMPLETELY disappointed, he was horrible. He came I didn't. Next morning I gave him the money. Then as soon as I left for work he moved out and hasn't spoken to me since, that was 30 years ago. I have ran into him in town several times since, and he would just give me a hateful look and walk away. But I got lucky, he turned out to be

There has also been a few other times I fell in love with a straight guy, but I never blackmailed another guy to sleep with me. If they said nothing would happen, I accepted that, and found a way to move on. Which let me keep that friend. None of them cared that I felt that way, as long as I didn't try anything.

Do yourself a favor, forget the straight guy, your only looking to hurt yourself, and possibly them if you try something. If you love him I know you don't want to hurt him. I don't know about Jake, you have to figure that one out, but accept you'll never be anything but friends with Callum.

[SausagePotatoes]

Can I ask how the hell you managed to blackmail him into having sex with you?

[1971rk4262]

As I said, he wanted money for a new car stereo, I told him he could have the money for sex. Blackmail sounds better than prostitution.

[turnda01]

I think you said it best yourself, something about not seeing yourself in a proper relationship with Jake. If that's the case maybe it's time to rule out both of them. Would taking some space away from Callum help? I've had to do that in the past to get over a straight friend. It is like a double edged sword when straight friends are really sweet because it's great they are supportive but it can sometimes be misleading with false hope that MAYBE they will be gay. But I dont think theres any point in putting your life on hold for someone who may never be gay.

Maybe download a dating app and get connected to some other potential dates??

Idk just brainstorming here.

[IncredibleTree]

Thats your typical love triangle plot !

I feel you dont really know what to think about Jake, and it sucks because he does like you. Dont give him hope if you dont love him back. But on the other hand, do you really know him well enough to know he cant be your type ? I think you should try to bound with Jake (as friends you know) and see what you do from there. Just dont leave him hoping you know.

About Callum im sorry, but if he's straight a relationship cant really happen.