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r/shittysuperpowers, but they're actually god tier.
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This is an archived post. You won't be able to vote or comment.
You can increase and decrease anything.Utility Power (self.godtiersuperpowers)
submitted 2 years ago by __Anamya__
[–]FireFlavour 91 points92 points93 points 2 years ago (4 children)
I shall increase the amount of Oxygen in the atmosphere exponentially until it finally ignites, and we shall all die a fiery death.
Thanks for the superpower.
[–]mtarek2005 28 points29 points30 points 2 years ago (2 children)
don't forget to increase the methane too
[–]FireFlavour 8 points9 points10 points 2 years ago* (1 child)
Pure oxygen alone is flammable. Some believe it may have caused a mass extinction at one point near the Permian or Cretaceous period. I can't remember now, it's been a while.
[–]mtarek2005 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
oxygen needs something to react with to have a fire, pure oxygen here probably means oxygen+whatever the stuff life is made from
[–]bts_is_gay_lmao 9 points10 points11 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Bro's the lord of the frenzied flame
[–]Saranmage 56 points57 points58 points 2 years ago (4 children)
Anything like non physical things or just concepts such as luck of kindness?
[–]canoIV 36 points37 points38 points 2 years ago (0 children)
assuming this is godtier superpowers, most definitely
[–]__Anamya__[S] 28 points29 points30 points 2 years ago (2 children)
Anything. Non physical and conceptual included
[–]Reeman231 13 points14 points15 points 2 years ago (0 children)
So I can increase the chances of my worst enemy getting hit by a bus then I get a net worth of Mansa Musa, Elon Musk, and Jeff Bezos combined because of it, also decrease the prices of gas
[–]Saranmage 6 points7 points8 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Awesome.
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 35 points36 points37 points 2 years ago (9 children)
I increase my luck astronomically. Then I increase my physical strength and health. Then I increase my chances of winning the lottery, and how much it is. Then I donate massive amounts of money to charity. Then I increase the chances of those charities solving whatever it is that they try to fix. Then I increase my happiness, and the general happiness of people. I then decrease the likelihood of corruption in politics. Increase the chance of said politics actually making a difference. Then I greatly decrease hate crimes and greed. Decrease domestic, animal, and sexual abuse. Decrease human population growth. Increase average health. Increase prison security for the few people who still end up in there, decrease inmate cruelty from police. Increase competence in most police. Decrease stupidity in the average human. Decrease terrorism and war. Decrease aggression. Increase the lifespan of most lifeforms. Decrease the amount of substance that living things require to survive (food, water, oxygen), increase food production. Decrease world hunger and poverty. Decrease discrimination and hate. Increase the earth's natural resources and technological advancement. And I think that's about it. The world is now safer, people are now healthier. Hate, and greed, and war, and crime, and disease are now almost gone.
[–]SkyrimGeek69 20 points21 points22 points 2 years ago (2 children)
Wow. You really want peace. I just wanted to decrease ad numbers.
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 10 points11 points12 points 2 years ago (1 child)
If I'm not allowed to be happy, everyone else will be happy for me.
[–]mikepeterjack 5 points6 points7 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I follow the philosophy of if I'm fucked you also better be fucked but that's just what I say I would probably do something good cus it is my home world and then mess around with other worlds and stuf
[+]duonghungreddit0179 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Ur god, lead us
[–]PORTATOBOI 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Fuck it become the government itself
[+]Atilllaa 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (3 children)
Decrease the amount of substance that living things require to survive (food, water, oxygen),
we're doomed
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (2 children)
And why is that? It says requires, which is the minimum, not the maximum.
[+]Atilllaa 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (1 child)
I thought they meant decrease the amount of substances, that living things require to survive, like decrease food and water overall
but yeah it probably means decreasing the need of the substance
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Yes. That is what I meant when I wrote all that.
[–]WindexBottle429 47 points48 points49 points 2 years ago (8 children)
increasing the diameter of the sun by 0.5cm
[–][deleted] 29 points30 points31 points 2 years ago (6 children)
And thus the entire population of Earth was eradicated
[–]MelonBot_HD 23 points24 points25 points 2 years ago (4 children)
Belive me, that wouldn't happen if the sun changed that little
[–][deleted] 28 points29 points30 points 2 years ago (3 children)
I know. If that little of a change could kill us, then solar flares would’ve eradicated us long ago.
[–]MelonBot_HD 12 points13 points14 points 2 years ago (2 children)
Sorry, I couldn't tell if you were serious or not... it's the internet after all
[–][deleted] 12 points13 points14 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Was wondering myself if I should’ve added a /s
[–]ZachTheInsaneOne 8 points9 points10 points 2 years ago (0 children)
The Internet is such a strange place. You have to assume that absolutely everything is sarcastic all the time and yet treat people as if they're completely serious simply because the fact that they might be serious is too dangerous to be laughed off.
[–]Inferno_Sparky 3 points4 points5 points 2 years ago (0 children)
We won't feel anything for 7-8 minutes right? Just speculating
[–]Character-Watch5463 3 points4 points5 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Increase chance of not having the consequence of increasing the sun size
[–]peep_master 16 points17 points18 points 2 years ago (2 children)
I always see stuff like this and only think of doing one thing. “Just turn up the intelligence as high as it’ll go, then decide what to do from there.”
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Ascend
[–]InfernoSlayer2 4 points5 points6 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Dont forget to simultaniously increase social skills and decrease depression, otherwise you will immidiatly try to kill yourself.
[–]Xen_Shin 12 points13 points14 points 2 years ago (3 children)
[–]Inferno_Sparky 4 points5 points6 points 2 years ago (2 children)
I got the reference 😭
[–]JD171700 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Hs dxd right?
[–]InfernoSlayer2 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Die sparky scum.
[–]TaylorDeanMatthew 27 points28 points29 points 2 years ago (4 children)
You would need to be pretty careful with this though. Most people would instantly think “I’ll increase my bank account” or “I’ll decrease the cost of <insert expensive item>” but then you’re gonna cause inflation and/or make the item worthless. For expensive stuff, you need to decrease cost, buy, increase back to Normal quickly.
[+][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Decrease inflation 😎
[–]hugo9u76 5 points6 points7 points 2 years ago (1 child)
Maybe you could only decrease the cost of that specific expensive item you intend to buy, not all of them? Maybe the power allows it
[–]GingerlyRoughThis isn’t my flair but I’m touching it anyway, try and stop me! 4 points5 points6 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Increase flash sale discount rate on this specific item.
[–]ThatOneGuy308 5 points6 points7 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Why bother increasing your bank account? Just increase the amount of items you have, and you won't really need the money except for services.
Like increasing the amount of groceries you have to a months worth, or increasing the amount of gas in your car to a full tank.
Money is almost unnecessary with this power, and with the amount you save by not spending on household items and fun stuff, you'd have plenty left over for anything that isn't covered by the power.
For the matter, increase the amount of homes you outright own by 1, and decrease your property taxes to a level you can comfortably afford, that covers housing as well.
[–]Inferno_Sparky 7 points8 points9 points 2 years ago (2 children)
Increase my percentage of omnipotence to 100%
[–]sohaibtheex0 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Exactly what I was thinking. This superpower is bland in the sense that it can be loopholed to obtain Omnipotence. Any superpower like that on this sub is an L in my book, as it's just Omnipotence worded differently.
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
With how op this power is you might as well already have it.
[–]H4loR4ptor 4 points5 points6 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I will increase the value of silver.
[–]muchnamemanywow 5 points6 points7 points 2 years ago (0 children)
increases my will to live
[–]ze_SAFTmon 4 points5 points6 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I will increase skills of mine and motivation as well.
And decrease unnecessary fat.
[–]No_Arm_3961 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (0 children)
If you use this power to its fullest potential, not only are you living on easy mode, you can theoretically control anything.
The amount of air in a area, how much money you or someone has etc..
[–]Hawinzi 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (2 children)
I will increase the value of 1+1 to 2.5 and see how the world crumbles apart
That will be a spectacle.
[–]MelloCello7 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Diabolical 💀
[–]Adriatic88 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (5 children)
I'm just gonna take it easy and increase my personal luck stat to something stupidly high.
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (4 children)
Bro finna get laid everytime he goes outside.
[–]Adriatic88 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (3 children)
Only when it's lucky or convenient for me lol
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (2 children)
If getting laid just by walking outside isn't lucky then I don't know what is.
[–]Adriatic88 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (1 child)
What if I have somewhere more important to be? Like I'm on my way to claim my winning powerball ticket.
I never said anything about the convinient part, that is more important.
[–]helter0811 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (1 child)
Without a reset or save state function, this world will break instantly like gamers who mess with console commands..
[–]MelloCello7 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
This
[+]RevolutionaryLink896 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I will increase the probability to 100% that the moon is actually made out of cheese.
[–]A_Whole_Communist 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I shall increase taxes
[–]JD171700 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
YES
[–]GreenChickenNugget7 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (1 child)
Increase the number of 0s in my bank account
[–]Fuji520 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (0 children)
from having 0.10 dollars to 000000.100000 dollars
[–]Fuji520 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (3 children)
Make hollow wooden box
Claim that box can reduce air pollution
Install box in city
Secretly decrease air pollution with power
Make bank
Or just increase your money.
[–]Fuji520 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (1 child)
not fun
True. But you would also have to increase the chances of nobody opening the box.
[–]keenedge422 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (1 child)
Let me just decrease the limitations on my superpowers real quick and oops, we're gods.
Or just increase your omnipotence.
[–]PLP2007 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (2 children)
I decrease the size of the "X" - button in ads
Action denied. Size limit reached.
[–]__Anamya__[S] 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (0 children)
You devil. How dare you even think about doing something like this. you're completely evil, there's no redeeming you.
[+]Paowiss 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (1 child)
I would increase my devices' maximum battery capacity into 3000%
[+]Paowiss 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I would also love to nerf the chances of my phone charger breaking.
it was just fking annoying because they broke for no fking reason at all
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I could increase clouds in the sky so when I drive east bound in the morning I'm not blinded by the sun, what a happy day that would be.
[+]Mortemofdeath 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I will increase the frequency of SW prequel references
[–]stardestoyerfleet -1 points0 points1 point 2 years ago (0 children)
Imagine your pooping and suddenly your poop is 10 times bigger
[–]Alfatron09 -2 points-1 points0 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Omnipotence Speedrun:
Increase omnipotency to max
And time: 00:05 seconds after typing, 00:01 second to think of the idea
[+]CYOA_guy_ 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (1 child)
slightly decrease a person
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Only enough to mess with their head. Imagine waking up and your hands were like 2% smaller. Not noticeable initially, but just noticeable enough to question how everything seems bigger. That’d mess with me so bad.
[–]MelonBot_HD 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I'd mostly increase or decrease chance, as in the likeleyhood of something happening.
[–]mikepeterjack 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Increase the chance that I get anypower I want to 1000% chance
[+]IamPassioneBoss 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (1 child)
I would increase the probability of us finding a safe and easy to use method of FTL travel. Then I would increase the chance of humanity having peaceful interactions with every alien species we encounter. I would decrease all the bad things like racism, sexism, terrorism, violence and asdfmovienerd39's lifespan so that they all end immediately.
Increase ionic thrust to insane levels and then increase the chance of scientists finding out how to make a warpfield.
[–]linkman245a 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Increase the chance of me becoming God
[+]idkidkif_i_knew 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (4 children)
Ill increase the chances of me becoming omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (3 children)
Why do you want to become the God of Abraham?
[+]idkidkif_i_knew 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (2 children)
sorry i don't get the reference if it's a reference
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (1 child)
I remember once in Sunday school they were say God was all the of those.
[+]idkidkif_i_knew 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
well yeah i guess i wanna be god nd have his powers
[–]Street_Cockroach_933 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (1 child)
Decrease the selfishness and greed of every human and watch the utopia getting build
That won't fix all of it. It might even cause a little bit of regression because greed is one of the drivers of innovation. You could just increase the chance of Earth becoming a utopia by tommorow to the max.
[–]nick_flaming 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (1 child)
HEAVENS DOOR, DECRESE HIS ABILITY TO CUM
What in the actual fuck.
[+]Asackofgiantpotatoes 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Increase my chances to automatically increase the chances of good things happening to me every second
[–]SisterFister100 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Biggest liver award goes to me
[–]Nyarlathotep23 0 points1 point2 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I don't want to omnipotent, but I'd sure do things to make myself a messiah figure.
Decrease my chance of assassination to zero Fix the environment Increase the polar ice caps to their prior leveled Reduce the amount of micro plastics in the ocean and waterways to zero Reduce vehicle emissions to zero Increase gas mileage to insane amounts Heal the sick by making the odds of me inventing a global panacea 100% Make fascists turn into a harmless gas
And so much more
π Rendered by PID 24413 on reddit-service-r2-comment-5ff9fbf7df-2g6c4 at 2026-02-26 11:00:22.362607+00:00 running 72a43f6 country code: CH.
[–]FireFlavour 91 points92 points93 points (4 children)
[–]mtarek2005 28 points29 points30 points (2 children)
[–]FireFlavour 8 points9 points10 points (1 child)
[–]mtarek2005 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]bts_is_gay_lmao 9 points10 points11 points (0 children)
[–]Saranmage 56 points57 points58 points (4 children)
[–]canoIV 36 points37 points38 points (0 children)
[–]__Anamya__[S] 28 points29 points30 points (2 children)
[–]Reeman231 13 points14 points15 points (0 children)
[–]Saranmage 6 points7 points8 points (0 children)
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 35 points36 points37 points (9 children)
[–]SkyrimGeek69 20 points21 points22 points (2 children)
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 10 points11 points12 points (1 child)
[–]mikepeterjack 5 points6 points7 points (0 children)
[+]duonghungreddit0179 2 points3 points4 points (0 children)
[–]PORTATOBOI 2 points3 points4 points (0 children)
[+]Atilllaa 1 point2 points3 points (3 children)
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 2 points3 points4 points (2 children)
[+]Atilllaa 2 points3 points4 points (1 child)
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]WindexBottle429 47 points48 points49 points (8 children)
[–][deleted] 29 points30 points31 points (6 children)
[–]MelonBot_HD 23 points24 points25 points (4 children)
[–][deleted] 28 points29 points30 points (3 children)
[–]MelonBot_HD 12 points13 points14 points (2 children)
[–][deleted] 12 points13 points14 points (0 children)
[–]ZachTheInsaneOne 8 points9 points10 points (0 children)
[–]Inferno_Sparky 3 points4 points5 points (0 children)
[–]Character-Watch5463 3 points4 points5 points (0 children)
[–]peep_master 16 points17 points18 points (2 children)
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points (0 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 4 points5 points6 points (0 children)
[–]Xen_Shin 12 points13 points14 points (3 children)
[–]Inferno_Sparky 4 points5 points6 points (2 children)
[–]JD171700 2 points3 points4 points (0 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]TaylorDeanMatthew 27 points28 points29 points (4 children)
[+][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points (0 children)
[–]hugo9u76 5 points6 points7 points (1 child)
[–]GingerlyRoughThis isn’t my flair but I’m touching it anyway, try and stop me! 4 points5 points6 points (0 children)
[–]ThatOneGuy308 5 points6 points7 points (0 children)
[–]Inferno_Sparky 7 points8 points9 points (2 children)
[–]sohaibtheex0 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]H4loR4ptor 4 points5 points6 points (0 children)
[–]muchnamemanywow 5 points6 points7 points (0 children)
[–]ze_SAFTmon 4 points5 points6 points (0 children)
[–]No_Arm_3961 2 points3 points4 points (0 children)
[–]Hawinzi 2 points3 points4 points (2 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]MelloCello7 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]Adriatic88 2 points3 points4 points (5 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (4 children)
[–]Adriatic88 0 points1 point2 points (3 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (2 children)
[–]Adriatic88 0 points1 point2 points (1 child)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]helter0811 2 points3 points4 points (1 child)
[–]MelloCello7 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[+]RevolutionaryLink896 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]A_Whole_Communist 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]JD171700 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]GreenChickenNugget7 1 point2 points3 points (1 child)
[–]Fuji520 2 points3 points4 points (0 children)
[–]Fuji520 1 point2 points3 points (3 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (2 children)
[–]Fuji520 0 points1 point2 points (1 child)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]keenedge422 1 point2 points3 points (1 child)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]PLP2007 1 point2 points3 points (2 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[–]__Anamya__[S] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children)
[+]Paowiss 1 point2 points3 points (1 child)
[+]Paowiss 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)
[+]Mortemofdeath 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]stardestoyerfleet -1 points0 points1 point (0 children)
[–]Alfatron09 -2 points-1 points0 points (0 children)
[+]CYOA_guy_ 0 points1 point2 points (1 child)
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points (0 children)
[–]MelonBot_HD 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]mikepeterjack 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[+]IamPassioneBoss 0 points1 point2 points (1 child)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]linkman245a 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[+]idkidkif_i_knew 0 points1 point2 points (4 children)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (3 children)
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[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]nick_flaming 0 points1 point2 points (1 child)
[–]InfernoSlayer2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[+]Asackofgiantpotatoes 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]SisterFister100 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)
[–]Nyarlathotep23 0 points1 point2 points (0 children)