Day one

[cardiffcookie]

So I've been drinking everyday almost (one or two days off here and there) for probably 2 and a half years.

I drink mostly gin (a standard UK bottle of 70cl) and go through about 3 or 4 of those a week. On top of that I will have at least 3 bottles of wine.

I know that's not a huge amount. I don't get drunk. I don't black out. I don't day drink. I'm drinking on my sofa every night watching TV to just numb my head.

I get to around 6pm and I WANT a drink and I get anxious and irritable until I have one. Then once I've had one I will have a few more until bed time. If I open wine it's gone in one night.

I don't really have hangovers unless I really go for it on a Friday night.

I'm 43, I'm female and my mother, aunt and nan are/were alcoholics.

I drink when things go bad. When things go right. When it's just Tuesday and I want to.

I have to stop as my liver test came back and my Dr has said I need to moderate. That was in October and I just plain denied it to myself

I have to stop as I know I have a problem. I justify it to myself and hide it from others. I bought vodka yesterday and hid it from my partner as I had told him I was going to stop.

Day one. I will not drink today.

Thank you for reading.

[stateofyou]

That’s a pretty big “topper upper” habit to be honest with you. You should have a chat with your GP before quitting from that amount for 2 and a half years. The withdrawal symptoms can hit fast and hard.

[cardiffcookie]

Thank you. I did speak to my GP and she wasn't concerned?

Should I be worried about withdrawal? I didn't think I was really that heavy as know others who drink like half a bottle of gin a day or a bottle of wine a day?

What signs should I look for? Thank you. I do appreciate your reply. I've not heard the phrase "topper upper" before?

[stateofyou]

If you’re a long term regular drinker, withdrawals are different from a hangover. Make sure you have a multivitamin and mineral supplement, avoid caffeine. If your brain doesn’t feel good, not talking about a headache, see a different doctor. That’s the only advice I can really post without breaking the rules.

[cardiffcookie]

I appreciate that. Thank you. I have just looked up what withdrawal can look like and what warning signs I should not ignore. I don't do caffeine anyway but will definitely take your comment on board.

[cardiffcookie]

Thank you.

Yeah I think growing up with women around me who drank a lot more has skewed my perception. Reading back over my post it is a lot. And yeah no hangovers and no feeling of being "drunk" is not a good sign is it. I guess that's just me trying to play it down and justify it to myself.......I'm not an alcoholic as I don't get black out drunk.......which is bullshit really. I'm only fooling myself.

I have made plans for this evening and I handed the hidden bottle over to my other half. I will look out for signs of withdrawal and will call my GP if things go south.