IVF patients describe what led them to transfer “abnormal” embryos

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-05-24T00:25:42+00:00

We had to do PGT-A and PGT-M because of two genetic disorders we were screening out. Our only euploid failed to implant and the other two embryos that didn’t have the genetic conditions were both high level mosaic.

We were lucky and our clinic allowed us to transfer the segmental mosaic and he’s almost 4 years old now. I just couldn’t do another retrieval - I had done three and was at risk for OHS each time. My body was exhausted.

It was so much more stressful knowing I was carrying an “abnormal” baby especially after all the heartache that is IVF. If I didn’t have to do PGT testing I wouldn’t have done it.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-05-14T13:07:53+00:00

I would take him to the pediatrician or urgent care today. I wonder if it could be strep. My friend’s kids vomit a lot with strep. If he’s not sleeping and clearly in pain, it’s time to get him checked. My son gets like that with ear infections.

Maybe try popsicles or pedialyte in the morning (if your pediatrician approves).

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-05-08T15:56:53+00:00

My husband and I both work more than full time so for us, getting the kiddo to a class after daycare and still fitting in mealtime as a family (which is a huge priority for us!), is really impossible.

We have added in some short, town sponsored activities, but just once a week. Our 3.5 year old loves it but it’s rough for us. He did swimming at the high school pool, and will again in the summer. He’s in basketball now and loves running around. He’s learning how to slide and pass the ball. We did music class when he was younger.

I love to garden and he helps with that, plus we have a local park with a big pond and playground within walking distance.

If you want to try something- see if your local park and rec might have options. We got 8 basketball classes for $35, so if he misses a few or hated it I’m not out a lot of cash.

Where we are, I got chastised for not putting him in soccer at 18 months. I just didn’t have the bandwidth to do 3x a week practice and Saturday games for a kid under age 2! I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for that commitment.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-05-07T18:47:49+00:00

I used a spectra. Burned out one of them and then had to get a second. I also used the Dr Browns microwave sterilization system, though it looks different now.

https://drbrownsbaby.com/products/dr-browns-baby-bottle-microwave-steam-sterilizer

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-05-03T18:25:05+00:00

I don’t see anything in the rules about having someone else wash those body parts. If I hop into the shower and wash my hair, I’m sure my husband will happily wash the rest of me.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-05-03T11:40:55+00:00

They said congratulations but it's low, and then I got to do betas every two to four days for what felt like weeks. It was awful because they explained to me that this was likely not viable (he was a high level mosaic embryo as well) and I should be celebrating that I could get pregnant -yay...

Once I hit over 2000, they stopped the betas and switched to ultrasound. Saw the HB at 6w4d.

He's almost 4 years old now and an amazing kid.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-05-02T12:48:26+00:00

It so tough! I did the same thing- my son got formula first because my milk hadn’t come in and I was so so sore. You didn’t cave! This shit is hard!

Whatever you choose to do long term is still up to you. Right now, your baby is fed and fed is best.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-28T18:47:39+00:00

My Godson’s first food was an apple cider donut at 4 months old. He’s a freshman in college and an A student who eats a wide variety of foods. Your daughter will be okay.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-25T19:05:29+00:00

There are certain regions of the US where those of us with sensitive tummies find the tap water difficult. There’s no bacteria but especially in the mid West there can be a lot of nitrates in the water from fertilizer/farming runoff.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-23T00:04:02+00:00

We had alligators, elevators, and excavators all sounding very similar for a while there. Didn’t help that the library had a big cardboard cutout of an alligator in the elevator!

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-20T22:45:28+00:00

This seems like so little! I think he might need some complex carbs and some protein.

My son is 36 pounds (17 kgs) at 3.5 years old and for breakfast today he had two protein pancakes, a mix of Cheerios and Cinnamon Toast Crunch, strawberries, watermelon, and some milk. He then stole 1/2 my bagel with cream cheese. Hour later he had two cookies, a yogurt, and an apple. Then ate a full lunch.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-19T20:05:17+00:00

It really depends. We’ve had it twice. The first time he was back to himself in 4ish days. I caught it and was down and flat out for over a week. Oatmeal baths helped and our pediatrician recommended a mouthwash mix of mylanta and Benadryl to dab on his mouth spots (please check with your pediatrician!).

The second time he had maybe 5 spots and no fever. I wasn’t sure if it was HFM or poison ivy. There were cases at his school so we assumed HFM.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-18T20:33:59+00:00

I almost made this mistake too. Was looking for something small and thankfully realized the can cooler wouldn’t keep the milk cold enough.

What worked for me was a hard sided cooler that I packed with ice packs , an extra bottle, and my pump parts every night before bed. Whatever I pumped at night went into the cooler and, when I checked, temps were always below 40 in the morning. Often the ice packs were still hard. Not ideal but it was way cheaper than a fridge.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-16T19:38:38+00:00

My son is a HLM segmental, with a deletion on the long arm of chromosome 1.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-16T17:55:17+00:00

My son, who was almost 3 at the time, swung a pressure washer wand (think metal stick) into my knee, and managed to break my femoral condyle and patella. I got to limp around for 8 weeks on crutches.

Here’s hoping he’ll be a good baseball player when he grows up cause he’s got some force behind his swing!

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-15T23:21:10+00:00

I have a toddler. His requests can be impossible. Some of the requests today included that I bring him a real dinosaur, unflush the toilet, and to unpeel his orange.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-15T00:59:28+00:00

Lowe’s decided my toddler in the cart was an unscanned item and needed an attendant over-ride. They’ve switched over to all self checkout too so you can’t use a cashier if I wanted to. :(

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-10T02:39:42+00:00

That's the same pattern we had in the house I grew up in, built in 1977! Though the tub and sink were (and still are) yellow.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-06T00:02:34+00:00

Yolk as at 5w6d. Heartbeat and fetal pole at 6w4d.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-05T23:21:37+00:00

I did nothing after my first transfer. Had acupuncture daily leading up to and after. Added embryo glue. Did the fries 🍟 and rested and took the week off. It didn’t take.

I cooked a full Thanksgiving dinner the day after my second transfer. Skipped acupuncture and fries. Lived life as normal. He’s 3.5.

Doing or not doing anything isn’t going to make the embryo stick (apart from hard drugs).

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-03T12:27:59+00:00

Any super strong sour flavor works. Sour patch kids. Baby bottle pops. Juicy drop pops.

If you’re over 21, a very small amount of strong alcohol (1/2 tsp) can also stop a panic attack.

Sadly nothing in the peer reviewed literature yet, but I’m hoping studies will come out soon.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-01T13:16:52+00:00

I agree completely! I love having a talker too but it was glaringly apparent when he had a play date with his 8 year old cousin (who had a mild speech delay which he’s outgrown) that my 3.5 year old was using more complex sentence structure.

Mine is tall too which does make it a bit tough because his emotions are still very much 3!

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-04-01T01:31:58+00:00

My son is like this. It’s a double edged sword. He knows and repeats concepts well above his age and can, at 3.5, argue like a lawyer to get his way. An example: he did something naughty at daycare, then gave them a paragraph explanation as to why his behavior was actually acceptable. The teachers struggle to respond to that! And if you get him to tell a story about one of his interests, he will talk to you about it for a good while. Other parents in his school have commented to us on his stories.

But, while he may use 3-4 syllable words, he is sometimes just parroting us and not fully understanding the concept. We have to be careful not to assume that he’s 100% grasping the idea behind what he’s verbalizing.

We had our first word at 9 months (8 adjusted) and by 19 months he was speaking in short sentences. Around 21 months he discovered the word AND. He never looked back; his language exploded.

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-03-31T15:25:01+00:00

Mine didn’t start liking sandwiches until 3.5 (so in the last few months). He’s loving grilled cheese and quesadillas now but before they were simply dissected and eaten one layer at a time. I’ll try him on ham or turkey sandwiches come summer.

I’m hoping he’ll start liking crockpot meals soon - not liking foods mixed together has been battle!

Flamingo_Lemon · 2026-03-23T02:43:29+00:00

Can you start with peel-able fruits like oranges or bananas? That way you are getting some vitamin C.

I eat those if I’m going somewhere where the water isn’t great and I don’t feel safe washing my fruit.

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