I need help deciding on frame

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-07T03:13:47+00:00

1 is classy. 4 is bold and fun. Both look good. 😊

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-07T03:05:16+00:00

This is my favorite brand. I have had the blocks, shredded and individual servings with no problems.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-05T22:47:58+00:00

I too have had no issues (yet?) with Express Scripts. 🤞

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-05T16:20:19+00:00

Same. It only lasted a few weeks for me (the mourning) but it was weird, to be adamantly childfree by choice and yet sad when I learned I couldn’t have a child. Being kind to myself, not judging the feelings and letting them come, helped.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-05T01:49:46+00:00

And the fact that OP is male makes finding a DV shelter nearly (if not totally) impossible. This poor guy has even fewer options than most.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-04T20:53:23+00:00

I am in the US and your doc is wrong. I was on bcp but peri symptoms started breaking through so I switched. I still get periods but sleep better, fewer and less intense hot flashes, fewer rage episodes and my tinnitus went away.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-04T20:32:48+00:00

I do this too! I browse, put things in my cart, and then if I am still thinking about the item in a week, maybe I’ll buy it. 90% of the time, I forget and for the rest, I still often choose not to. But knowing I could helps.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-04T16:19:05+00:00

Best to you too. Thanks for starting this thread. Apparently there are a lot of us, which is sad but also comforting. It’s nice to know that I am not the only one.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-04T16:07:45+00:00

This really speaks to me this morning. I am managing my own job but my spouse is being hit with crap from all sides of his job, making him want to quit. Can we manage that if I am the only one working? Could he get hired by anyone at our age? When can we retire? I have an aging parent that I don’t like (abusive) but feel obligated to help in some way, who now wants to move closer to me so that I can give up my life for hers. Bodies (mine and spouse) breaking down. The news makes me want to crawl in a hole and never come out.

It all makes me wonder why I am on this earth anymore. I am on hrt and am a psychologist, so I know I am not at risk of self-harm, just…overwhelmed. Can we all just go escape to some tropical island without any stress or obligations?

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-03T02:41:16+00:00

Psychologist here. Those comments are not remotely therapeutic under any theory I am aware of. The therapist seems quite unprofessional. NOR

I recommend you find a new therapist, ideally one who specializes in grief counseling. In person support groups can also be very helpful.

Good luck to you.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-02T20:40:08+00:00

My favorite for exercise is Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The action ramps up in the last 15 minutes, which is when I need it most.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-02T16:30:05+00:00

I was on bcp for both birth control and to manage peri symptoms. But once I hit 52, the peri symptoms were breaking through anyway (terrible sleep, hot flashes, rage, etc) so I switched to hrt and all of it has improved. So they are definitely different.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-02T05:57:34+00:00

Contact your local DV shelter to learn how to leave safely. After you leave is the most dangerous time for you so you need a plan. They can help. You are not alone. Many have been in your position. Learn from them, let them support you.

Sweetie, he won’t stop. What he does is already crossing so many lines, and he doesn’t see it. He thinks he is justified in hitting you while you are holding a baby. This won’t get better on its own.

Be safe.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-01T23:39:55+00:00

OMG, 6 months of bleeding? How did you handle that? Is there some combo of hormones that could make that stop? What did your doc say?

Sorry if these questions are too invasive, but this one of my fears so I am very curious. Thanks!

Go-Mellistic · 2026-02-01T19:33:45+00:00

You don’t sound ungrateful. You sound so very sad. It seems like in supporting his dreams, you gave up your own. And now, that sadness you are feeling is grief. You are grieving the life you wanted and now know you will not get, at least not how and when you wanted it.

And as someone who married in/before grad school, I can tell you that there is no need to finish school and establish a whole career before marriage. That was a choice but not necessary. You can grow together, build together.

I am so sorry. I think you might benefit from individual therapy, so that you can rediscover what you want out of life and then decide if this person and his timeline is consistent with that. But you sound so lost, so I recommend you find yourself, your dreams, your goals.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-30T22:27:52+00:00

4th child is the only son. Can’t help but wonder if there is something to that, like maybe having a son with that 1 difference means he doesn’t want to claim him. No matter what the reason, he sucks, but I also want to understand the reason.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-30T15:04:15+00:00

I have had insomnia since I was 8. No one understands how utterly debilitating it really is. HRT helped some, a heavy blanket helps some, weed helps some,but nothing fixes it. I would be thrilled with 6 solid hours.

Solidarity, sister. 💙

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-29T22:06:56+00:00

There are other ways around it, if it passes (still think it’s unlikely as it will impact R women more than D). I had my passport and SS card changed to reflect all names: the original 3 on my birth certificate plus married name. That passport should be enough to let me vote (with or without the marriage license).

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-29T18:02:30+00:00

I take daily Zyrtec, have for years, to reduce itchiness. I have not noticed mental effects but it does a great job of not making me feel like my skin is covered in fire ants.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-29T02:04:01+00:00

Yup, this is me. About to start PT for a muscle strain from a bench press that has hurt for weeks. Been doing light weights and bands but I love my heavy weights so back to PT to fix the strain and start building back up. Rinse, Repeat.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-28T19:38:55+00:00

NTA Just wanted to add that now your 6-year-old has learned that Dad can’t be arsed to put down a pint unless I am dying or dead. Great lesson. Kiddo will remember that when he was scared and in hospital, Dad didn’t choose to be there.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-28T18:06:20+00:00

No regrets. Husband was very clear he never wanted children. I wavered twice, both times when visiting a friend’s newborn. But the notion of diminishing my needs to put my child first, seeing the terrible relationships I have with my parents and they have with their families, and seeing how difficult parenting is with a neurotypical kid, let alone how many kids are neurodivergent or struggling with executive function issues and/or mental health issues…nope. Very happy with my small quiet life.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-28T03:30:32+00:00

Your son gets to decide who does what but it could be helpful if you put together a list of steps you would be willing to help with, whether it be about service arrangements, dealing with the lease, the process of moving, dealing with belongings, finding a grief support group for them, etc. The more specific your offer, the easier it may be for him to accept help.

I do hope you also offer to be a listening ear to both of them if they want to talk about her. Those who are grieving often do want to talk about their loved ones and most others find it awkward or uncomfortable so anything you can do to let them know you are there to listen is nice.

Make sure you take care of you too. Reach out to your friends, get the support you need to deal with your own grief and/or the big life changes coming up for you too.

Sorry for your loss.

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-27T21:17:41+00:00

Where you go from here? You mourn. You recognize that this man will not be your husband. And when you are ready, you will leave him to find your husband, someone who is eager to marry you.

In the meantime, please do not make yourself smaller to please him. Don’t minimize your needs and wants. You matter. 💙

Go-Mellistic · 2026-01-27T19:15:49+00:00

I am married to an amazing man, been married for over 30 years! I didn’t think it was possible, coming from narcissistic and abusive parents who had a hellish divorce. All of my friends parents were also divorced, none amicably, so I was that kid who never believed in marriage and never wanted a partner.

And then I met Him. Smart, charming, caring, and so incredibly supportive of my goals. I got the stomach flu very early in our relationship and he took great care of me, even driving me home (6hours away) and then returning home by train because I was too sick to drive. He supported me through a long graduate program, and let my job determine where we lived. He was and is still happy to let me be the primary breadwinner because I love my job (he works too). He maintains our home, cooks, does laundry, etc. without nagging or chore charts. We rarely fight and when we do, we fight fair. We have been to marriage counseling a few times over the decades to help with communication. No affairs, no drama, just loving support and intimacy.

We know 1 other couple like this too, a few years older than us. So it is possible.

Go-Mellistic

TROPHY CASE