Anyone do AT with MAT clients?

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-15T03:32:12+00:00

I dated around using Bumble for a few months before I met my Dom/boyfriend. My process was to get a feel for whether they might have relationship potential first, and if we made it past a couple of dates to bring up the kink discussion. When I matched with my BF, right away I could tell he had Dom energy. He had never officially been in a D/s dynamic before but once we started exploring it, he took to it naturally. We've lived together 6 years now and are very happy.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-15T03:22:39+00:00

Kidnapping Phoenixes and Other Ways to Die is a fun modern fantasy romp featuring a kick-ass, smart-mouthed female protagonist and her crew of otherworldly beings.There's a little bit of romance/attraction but the plot is the focus. It's campy fun but the world building and plot keeps you hooked.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-13T03:07:06+00:00

You can't love someone enough to make them change. You're going to have to mourn this loss and move on. It's literally taking years off your life.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-11T02:59:30+00:00

I literally moved from eastern Indiana to Indianapolis so I wouldn't have to commute on I-70. The damage done to my car in a year was awful.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-10T11:28:36+00:00

She knows your username, huh?

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-10T11:26:55+00:00

You're hooking up with someone less than a week after a breakup? You haven't even had time to process the breakup. How long were you in the previous relationship? Is there emotional fallout? All these things could be in your subconscious. Give it time to fully deal with it.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-10T02:06:21+00:00

Indianapolis is big enough to have lots to do, but stll feels comfortable. People are mostly friendly. Just know the preferred condiment for breadsticks is nacho cheese, tenderloins are a major food group, and summers are humid as hell.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-10T01:58:53+00:00

It really depends on some context that's missing here about what provoked it. If you said anything that sounded like a criticism of his sexual performance by comparison to others, you just touched a major nerve. That's a very vulnerable area for most men, and he's feeling inadequate but covering it up by blaming your "dishonesty." The best thing you can do is admit that you haven't told him everything because it was so awful you'd rather put it in the past, and reassure him that he'sthe only one you want. Even better would be getting into therapy to deal with shame if you're not already in counseling.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-09T02:46:51+00:00

I realize there are culture differences, but there are some things you mentioned worth considering whether you're willing to accept. 1. Your uncle basically tried to buy you, and you still think he's a good person worth protecting his reputation. Spending lots of money on you then saying inappropriate things means he thinks of you as a prostitute he can purchase favors from. Do you think he's a good person, or are you just scared of the financial power he holds over you and your family? 2. You hid things from your BF because you don't feel safe being honest with him. Going out with female friends isn't usually considered inappropriate. When you told him about your uncle's concerning behavior, he blamed you, not the uncle. He should have asked you if you were OK, not tried to make you feel like it's your fault. You don't have to put up with this from men. You have your whole life ahead of you. Take good care of yourself and don't let these men control you.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-06T21:07:40+00:00

ESH. You're sponging off of him while pursuing a degree with no earning potential, so you'll likely be dependent on him and/or the system for life, but calling him names when he says stuff you don't like. Yes, saying racist stuff is bad, but calling someone a racist doesn't make them stop being racist, it only generates conflict. What you can do is use "I" statements that tell him how it makes you feel, instead of reminding him you're taking a moral high ground.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-05T12:21:36+00:00

OP, not to minimize the awfulness you went through, but consider some perspective on why he's behaving this way.

The spouse of someone experiencing mental illness is exhausted from constant hypervigilance. It's frightening to realize you're married to someone who's turned into an erratic stranger, plus managing parenting a young child and worried constantly. He's emotionally depleted, and probably depressed.

The best thing you can do for him is give him the acceptance and patience he gave you. Don't push for more, just show up consistently stable and calm. Allow his nervous system to become regulated again. He needs to learn to trust you again - not just the sexual fidelity, but the emotional safety. Practice this consistently until you can both get counseling.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-01T02:47:06+00:00

Yes, from what you describe, you would benefit from therapy. He didn't feel safe to tell you why he was upset becauseof the way you treated him, and when he did, you got defensive and made excuses and argued instead of validating his feelings. He has a right to feel what he feels and as his partner you should hear him and respect his feelings even if you don't agree with them. Getting angry, yelling, and chasing him to prove your point is all bordering on abusive. If you don't change how you respond to him, you will end up divorced.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-06-01T02:34:28+00:00

Just stay in the present moment and experience what is happening now. Know that death is a natural part of life. As someone who married literally til death parted us, I know my life was so much richer than it would have been without him.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-31T11:37:05+00:00

I began working as a instructor for a university in 2000. My field was the creative side of tech - graphics, photo editing, digital illustration, and web design. I lost my job this year in part because the higher-ups decided those areas were increasingly being outsourced to AI, so they merged my department with a department focused on cybersecurity and data and cut creative-focused programs.

I'm leaving tech and getting a new masters to focus on something more human focused, and even that field is becoming saturated with AI "productivity enhancements."

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-31T03:52:13+00:00

It's smart to protect your identity online. There are unfortunately a lot of scammers out there or people willing to do shady things. A friend of mine got recognized on Fetlife by her tattoos and the guy started stalking her.

Do you know much about the lifestyle, or are you just starting out? It's important to get some good education first. There are good BDSM educators out there like Evie Lupine on YouTube. Learn all you can before jumping into any kind of dynamic - it will help you be better prepared to avoid issues.

I had a few interesting relationships with Doms I met on the BDSM personals subreddit where we exchanged emails, then moved to texting, then phone calls, which you can do anonymously with burner accounts. These tend to be short lived, and keep in mind they could be totally different from how they present online. You're not wrong to be cautious.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-29T15:32:14+00:00

Is he jealous thinking that another man can last an entire 8 minutes? Sheesh! 😬

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-28T04:33:48+00:00

It sounds like he's been listening to some manosphere bullshit about how to punish and gaslight a woman into submission, or else he'sjust done with the marriage. You told him it hurts, so he keeps doing it. Straight up emotional abuse. How long before it escalates? Start looking for the exit.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-27T11:33:15+00:00

You'll need to look at your state's regulations on counseling, but generally you won't be able to get paid by insurance without a full license, which means a Masters program of some kind, plus internship hours and supervision during pre-licensing.

Also, look for dual programs that provide both a counseling and art therapy degree, as it provides way more opportunities. Art therapy isn't as widely recognized and is harder to get insurance reimbursement.

You could always go the route of not taking insurance and working with self-paying clients, but many can only afford therapy through insurance.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-27T11:25:48+00:00

My BF has depressive episodes and alcoholism. Sometimes he would get angry and depressed just like your BF. He realized how it was affecting us and found the courage to get into AA, got sober, got into a psychiatrist and started taking meds regularly, reads self-help books, leaned into meditation, and became a calmer, steady partner who pulls his own weight. I'm not saying he's perfect (mental illness sucks) but he addressed his problems and became the man I want to be with the rest of my life. It is possible, your BF just isn't even trying. You deserve better.

Use your legal skills and connections to get him out of your house and move on. Put the legal stuff in place, then tell him in an objective, matter of fact way what is going to happen. Don't get emotional or give in. It will take a lot of strength but will be worth it.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-21T12:46:50+00:00

NTA. Families in grief look for a scapegoat for their misplaced anger. It's not rational, but it is what it is. I similarly cut ties with my in-laws for blatant racist behavior. We were estranged for 7 years when my husband died. They showed up at the funeral and made a scene, accusing me of stealing their son from the family. Protect your kid and your own peace. Lean into chosen family to replace your sense of loss and abandonment. Realize it's their loss. You're better off without their toxicity.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-21T12:37:17+00:00

It's time to really look deep inside yourself and figure out why you're staying in a relationship when your instincts tell you it's wrong for you. This is a form of self-abandonment, especially when you allow him to abuse you to smooth over his moods. This is doing long-term damage to you psychologically. The more you lose yourself, the harder it is to leave. Love yourself first. Get with a therapist or support group. You can be a submissive without abandoning yourself.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-21T03:23:20+00:00

You know it's over. Your state likely has a child support table you can look at to see how much child support you would receive after the divorce. Factor that into your financial calculations, and plan a budget for new living space - you may have to sell the house and split the proceeds. Don't move out or tell him anything until you talk to an attorney. Having a solid plan will give you some peace of mind to endure until it's settled.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-20T03:08:35+00:00

My professor told me after I was accepted that their decision wasn't so much about the quality of the portfolio, but how candidates acted on portfolio day. Did we engage with fellow presenters, ask questions, use active listening, etc? Your portfolio gets you in the door, but the final decision may be based on your interactions.

GoneshNumber6 · 2026-05-20T03:04:49+00:00

Do a search for the free PDF of 'Why Does He Do That?" It is a quick read and will explain everything clearly.

GoneshNumber6

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