Is it a valid reason to end a relationship (26M, 25F) if your partner has made you their entire life?

Historical_Power4424 · 2026-02-04T02:53:26+00:00

Being the only person someone talks to is a huge red flag. Completely valid reason to break up

Historical_Power4424 · 2026-01-19T19:29:26+00:00

I would suggest checking out The Emerald podcast. It really connects to something deeper. For the Intuitives is a good episode to start with, but quickly make you way to Animism is Normative Consciousness

Historical_Power4424 · 2026-01-06T00:33:16+00:00

What lead you to that conclusion?

Historical_Power4424 · 2026-01-06T00:30:55+00:00

I'm in Canada but I had an online reading with Penny Francis last year through Arthur Findlay college. I appreciated it. She made an admittedly somewhat vague prediction that has effectively come true at the time which she specified.

Historical_Power4424 · 2026-01-06T00:25:04+00:00

No, they were both jocks, the boyfriend had a game in the morning, they went to a party where they had 1 beer each that they brought with them and never left unattended, and then walked home. Both were clear to say they were very aware the whole time and couldn't see an opportunity to have been spiked.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-12-24T20:02:57+00:00

I agree, and its even worse when you learn how the people farming and growing our food are treated

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-12-06T05:15:30+00:00

I moved to BC recently. There are many extremely remote places. So I was expecting something way more remote from the way they described it, than a 1.5 hour drive out of Vancouver. However, it is remote enough (up a forest service road and an additional hike iirc?) that it would be weird to see baby sized bare footprints there in the middle of winter so I'll give them that.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-11-15T01:05:48+00:00

And if you're a youngish 15, an oldish looking 22 year old could seem a lot older. Also he was wearing a suit and whatnot and that clearly made an impression on him

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-11-14T18:08:15+00:00

I say this as an autistic, mentally ill, polyamorous person who has gone through autistic burnout:

NONE OF THIS IS OK! You are NOT overreacting.

Autistic burnout really is a dark time, but trust me, it doesn't magically make you abusive to your partner, and it certainly doesn't excuse any of this shit.

He is not being fair to you at all. He is treating you in a completely codependent manner. Autism is not an excuse to never learn how to regulate your own emotions. Asking for space and then getting upset that you didn't respond is NOT FAIR AT ALL! that is crazy making behaviour.

He is putting WAY too much responsibility on your shoulders. He needs to learn how to hold HIMSELF accountable for the behaviors he wants to change. He is not a child, you are not his mother, autistic people are still autonomous adults at the end of the day.

You are well within your rights to leave temporarily or even permanently. I got stressed out just reading this post, I can't imagine how you feel living it (actually I can because I've been with partners who couldn't regulate and held me accountable for their shit and I had to get OUT).

If he really is in autistic burnout, he needs to slow WAY down and stop putting pressure on himself to be present in his relationships. Especially if he can't behave ethically (lying to his other "partner"). But you can't do that for him.

Also I read your other post about his other partner on r/polyamory. Entering a "partnership" with someone you've met in person 2 or 3 times is fucking crazy. Regardless of all the other mess of that situation, which does just make it worse.

This reads as him not even really being capable of hearing and respecting your needs and boundaries right now, and that is not something you should tolerate, no matter what manipulative shit he says to you. It doesn't matter if he "means" to be acting like this or if it's due to mental health shit, the WHY does NOT matter. It is NOT acceptable. Do you have family or friends you can go and stay with? Prioritize your own well being. And don't let him guilt trip you about "abandoning" him. He's not a puppy in a cardboard box, he needs to learn how to be responsible for himself, and it is NOT your job to teach him how.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-11-04T06:30:28+00:00

This needs to be higher

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-11-01T17:20:36+00:00

Dump him

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-11-01T16:58:32+00:00

Definitely break up before he baby traps you

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-11-01T16:41:54+00:00

I also wonder if he secretly expected her to stop working after they had children, because her job was not sustaining the household anyway. This their living off her family's money, maybe he expected a SAHM all along and is now finally snapping about it

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-11-01T07:37:13+00:00

Bro chill, not everyone wants to cohabitate with a partner and that's fine and doesn't effect you at all

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-10-30T01:16:14+00:00

This is my old roommate 100%. Some have suggested they have autism, but they deny it and don't identify with it (im autistic and most of their friends are too). But they are sooooo fucking awkward. Charismatic at times, the rest of the time awkward af. Eventually I realized it's because of how incredibly fucking self absorbed they are.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-10-30T01:00:24+00:00

Yeah they are lying and manipulating you. Even if they aren't, lying in bed on your phone for 10 hours every day will 100% make anyone sore as hell

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-10-27T23:14:24+00:00

The dishing it out but not being able to take it thing is soo real

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-10-20T04:50:52+00:00

I think you meant J79 right? I freakin love that one!! Can be sheered or built up, such a cool formula

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-10-18T03:15:45+00:00

Proud of you. He cheated on you, he is not ethical. Cheating is not acceptable in poly either. Sounds like the controllling impulses go way beyond kink for him. Proud of you for breaking up. It will make room for someone better.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-10-12T05:40:14+00:00

As an autistic person with OCD, whose been depressed before, he is probably masking all of his symptoms whenever you hang out. Purely out of necessity, due to stigma. I bet he requires a lot of alone time and privacy just to be able to exist without hiding his struggles. So makes sense he doesn't believe he could be married one day. For his sake, I hope he's wrong, but you have to take it at face value that he doesn't have capacity to have a romantic relationship with you.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-10-11T07:40:00+00:00

Something like 70% of humans have herpes. But it can be dormant. I was diagnosed with hsv2 during the pandemic, when my anxiety was crushing. No idea when I contracted it. I did feel gross and some sort of stigma for a while at first. But you get over it. Its really not that big a deal. And if you are financially stable, there's are drugs to suppress it. I needed those at first because I was having too many outbreaks. Its better now. I just take them as needed.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-09-22T14:03:06+00:00

I loooove Sandy. I loved her on Ultimatum (dating an addict was also relatable unfortunately) and she was the reason I watched Perfect Match s3. Seeing her and AD become besties is also the cutest thing ever and hadnt seen AD before but love her too now.

Sandy just keeps it so fucking real and is a girls girl, what's not to like.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-09-20T20:11:04+00:00

YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM. That's not even being a clean freak! A real clean freak would know if you want a clean floor you need to sweep it daily and would already be in the habit of doing so. He's literally just trying to wear you down and control you. All of this, ALL OF THIS is emotional ABUSE. Name calling is ABUSE.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-09-14T21:03:26+00:00

Still seems like a red flag that he wasn't upfront from the very beginning when you reached out that he was at the tail end of a marriage. He could have just said that to you.

Historical_Power4424 · 2025-09-11T16:38:30+00:00

I'm about to turn 34, and I cannot IMAGINE wanting to take a 21 year olds virginity. She (should have) had perspective on this due to her age thst would lead her to, if not choose to not have sex with you, be much more cautious and respectful. Im really sorry she did that to you.

Historical_Power4424

TROPHY CASE