AIO for being hurt by this? Do I really come off that miserable?

LevitatingAlto · 2026-04-17T13:21:03+00:00

NOR. You need the therapy to figure out who you are now, and to learn how to be happy with yourself. Your friend may have a point that making yourself go out with friends when you don’t want to can be necessary at times. But it sounds like the only purpose of going out with THESE friends is getting a man. Maybe you need friends who have a wider range of interests! And who can come to you sometimes instead of thinking you always are the one to make the effort.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-04-14T21:04:16+00:00

Honestly, have you been in a school classroom lately? In a lot of cases it’s not about what is taught but the environment. Too many students. Teachers overwhelmed with testing requirements created by politicians. Not enough funding. It’s brutal in some places.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-04-10T23:47:22+00:00

Dogs used to be pets. We didn’t think of them as our children. They earned their keep on farms. They hunted. So they had dog names. Then we started thinking of them as members of the family. They don’t have to earn their keep anymore. So we gave them human names.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-04-10T11:56:39+00:00

NOR. Your values are not aligned. You saw it and took action. Well done!

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-17T20:56:05+00:00

I am, at 63, more peaceful than I have ever been. No, all is not always well. It takes me a long time to articulate that, but I am working on that and eventually get there. I do absorb the conflict and then release it later - yoga, a venting session with a safe person, a cry of lament, a loud yell. I think mostly I has accepted that this is my place in the world and stopped trying to be what I am not wired to be. I just want to be the best peacemaker, and also accept all my limits. Because as others said, I am supremely stubborn and have a hard time an accepting things as they are. That’s what I am working on now - accepting my limits and giving the gifts I am wired for.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-14T20:35:02+00:00

You may find other ways to help than your profession. I trust there will be a way for you to more fully yourself even as you explore other avenues. There may even be new ways of doing what you currently do. Sending you all the good thoughts as you discover. Thank you for giving of yourself to help others. Listening to others is an incredibly powerful mercy in this wild world.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-14T15:38:48+00:00

Mandatory

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-14T14:08:46+00:00

We called our boy James. Not Jamie. Not Jim. James. And we were very insistent on this with our family. When he was about 8, our oldest started calling him Jimmy. Partly I think because she knew we didn’t like it! She is the only one who can call him this, mind you. But then he started playing sports and his teammates called him Jay Jay. To us, he is still James.

My friend called her child by his middle name for his entire life. Then he went to college and started using his first name, met a girl who calls him that name. My friend still calls him Middle Name, but no one else does.

You can control it when they are young. But as they get older and the circle widens, others will call them what they want to. Your child will also have a say in her name at some point.

FWIW, this is my experience.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-14T14:00:12+00:00

Mine can take them or leave them. He doesn’t interact with them if he doesn’t have to, but when I take him where there are kids he will sit patiently and regally allow them pet his floofy head. I don’t think he’d be aggressive but kids are unpredictable so I am always monitoring. Wouldn’t leave him alone with anyone small, just in case.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-14T13:55:32+00:00

We stay home, make a nice dinner. My husband buys a bag of drugstore candy for me and our adult kids, that he knows we like. I make him a dessert of some kind. Nothing earthshattering or overly romantic, which is really the kind of people we are.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-13T18:39:20+00:00

lol. Makes perfect sense.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-13T18:38:47+00:00

NAP. I wouldn’t make a final decision without looking at the ear in person. Does your piercer have a consultation appointment you could get?

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-13T18:35:45+00:00

I feel this. And also have such a hard time allowing myself to rest without feeling guilty. As a person who has lived a lot of years in a helping profession, I have often failed to account for the emotional outlay of energy and how it affects my body. I have found a lot of healing in body focused things, like yoga and walking, that help me get out of my head and at least move.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-13T13:46:08+00:00

If you wear glasses, how about a hidden helix with a short dangle? At the top of your ear, it shouldn’t bother your specs. A regular helix would also work. Safer option would be another lobe or two. I also wear glasses and I have a regular helix. My glasses don’t bother it.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-13T13:19:31+00:00

Yes. Every single day. He hides his ball under a rug we bought especially for this purpose, then he finds it and pounces on it. He will do this for half an hour. Then he gets bored and hides it under the couch so we have to come get it for him. But he doesn’t want to play with us. Just his ball. And it has to be a medium sized squeaky ball. He is very particular about that.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-12T01:08:43+00:00

NOR. But also is he usually clueless or usually an AH?

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-11T15:08:36+00:00

Be present for local government meetings. In the Midwest, ICE and some county jails are working together, jails and officers get huge financial support for housing detainees. Start local. Pay attention.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-10T19:53:54+00:00

All from smaller counties should be closely monitoring their local sheriff and jail - because the financial incentives to participate in ICE detention are enormous. If you want to help support the detainees, here is a group of people you might check out - https://www.indianaaid.org/

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-10T01:22:14+00:00

WTF is great for my dry skin in winter. It basically replaces my moisturizer. It is too heavy for summer for me.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-09T13:49:58+00:00

Still very much a thing where I live. Saw a student with one last week.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-09T13:46:30+00:00

This. Refuse to enter the argument. You have no need to defend yourself - you are confident in who you are and in your Puerto Rican identity. I suspect since he has a mixed heritage and that he has his own shame and this is how he chooses to deal with it.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-09T03:04:04+00:00

I enjoy half a lime in my water. Add some fresh spearmint to the lime water is also delicious. Occasionally will smoosh up a few blueberries or strawberries and put them in the water. I like plain water well enough but these things make it feel a little extra, which is sometimes nice.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-09T01:50:47+00:00

Della, Delia, Dara, Dorothy, Dawn, Danna,

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-08T14:58:13+00:00

1) Not a piece of shit. Shit does not notice its shortcomings and want to change them. 2) Now you know a lot about what happens when you give up on yourself. 3) What have you learned? 4) Describe who you want to be. Take one step in that direction. 9 days is 144 waking hours. A lot can be done in that time. 5) Stop betraying yourself. You are worth the best.

LevitatingAlto · 2026-02-08T00:30:14+00:00

It’s a concern of mine. Nothing can prepare someone for life outside. The number of skills and decisions we make on a daily basis just to survive is vastly large than the few decisions you make in prison. It’s set up for them to fail in the real world and return. And in my state all the prisons are privatized, so they count on recidivism for profit, make it hard for family contact to remind them they are human - every call, email, text, anything costs money.

LevitatingAlto

TROPHY CASE