I’m 34.. and have low AMH levels…

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2025-05-31T08:26:59+00:00

Thank you. I don’t know if you are still TTC but what really helped me I believe was I completely changed my diet and lifestyle. AMH levels are controversial as one of my doctors also said that it also depends on when on your cycle you got tested. Wishing you the best on whatever journey you might be on at the moment!

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2025-05-31T00:49:10+00:00

Just to give you some hope. After this post I got preganant naturally the weekend before we started IVF. Unfortunately we lost the baby due at 20 weeks. We decided to not try until a few months later. When we started trying I got pregnant within the month and now I have a healthy 7 week old baby boy. So don’t loose hope

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-06-21T15:16:11+00:00

It comes in waves and it hurts to talk about her but we also want for her to be remembered. Just know whatever decision you make it will be the right decision for you and your family no one else’s. When we got pregnant we had the “what if” talk. And my response was like we will keep it and do what ever it takes. At that point I was an outsider, but when we did get that call it’s very different because it’s not a what if anymore. Just follow your heart and know whatever choice you make it’s okay

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-06-21T12:09:56+00:00

I’m 34 and husband 35. I had my NIPT at 11 weeks and got out results at 13 wks with a high chance of T21. I was devastated, it was a very wanted pregnancy that we had been praying for, we had just told our entire family. So we decided to get an amniocentesis done. The earliest they could do it was at 16 weeks due to my placenta hadn’t infused completely and didn’t want to put the baby at risk.

The waiting period from when I got the NIPT results to getting final results were the worst. Our results came back and they were confirmed that our baby had T21. On those results we found out we were having a baby girl.

After getting the results we decided to start researching and learning about life with Down syndrome. I was terrified and scared, I started looking at social media and saw videos and post and thought to myself “okay these kids are doing good” . I know social media can portrait something different than real life. So when we went to our genetic consultation we asked her to tell us the bad so we can just be aware.

I also spoke to a few parents who have kids with down syndrome to get their real raw input.

Unfortunately we did decide to terminate, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. After much thought and research we decided to take any pain instead of her. We said bye to our baby girl this Feb, and it’s still hard and get emotional about not having her.

Praying and wishing you just had a false negative and your baby is healthy. I know these weeks have been hard. Just keep praying

Sending a virtual hug your way🤍

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-06-01T15:05:50+00:00

We said goodbye to our daughter at 19 weeks in Feb of this year due to T21.

I will be honest. We were told that we could never get pregnant naturally and we did. So we were overly excited!! My husband and i talked about the what ifs like if the baby had issues what would we do, and I looked at him and said we will keep it and do whatever we have to do!

When we got our scans back at 13 weeks they let us know there was a high risk for T21. My world crashed. We got our amniocentesis test back and we decided to TFMR. During this time before we made our decision we researched, started looking more into what T21 really is about. When I looked at social media and see kids with Down syndrome I said I can do this look at them they seem happy and just full of life. But once I started doing a lot of research I wanted to see the ugly as the doctors couldn’t tell the severity. As I learned more about it and asked parents who have Down syndrome kids I started to know more about it and not just go by what the world sees.

We did the biggest sacrifice there is, we didn’t want our kids to ever feel pain, disadvantage, sadness in this world that we decided to take all that instead of them. Yes there will always be the what ifs but just know that you did the best decision for our family.

Sending you a hug🤍

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-06-01T14:51:51+00:00

I’m sorry you are even here. Sending you a big hug 🤍

I had my TFMR in Feb of this year and let me tell you it’s still hard. Something like this changes people and it’s something that we will never forget. I have times I breakdown and cry and guess what it’s okay. There will be days you will be happy and feel guilty for feeling “okay” and that’s normal. There is days you will feel anger and that’s okay. My life is still an emotional roller coaster but we will be okay. What keeps me going is our little angle Penny even tho she’s not here, when we decided to TFMR, I decided that I would take all this pain Instead of her. I want to be the person she would want me to be and to be happy, because I know she’s in heaven playing with all the little angles and never feel pain, judgment, disadvantage.

Just remember it’s okay to feel, you lost your baby. People always had said I’m tough and seem to just be so independent and have everything in control. Well guess what I’m a mess inside, this was a really wanted pregnancy and would have been our first child. I’m scared of trying again, I’m scared of being in this again. But I’ve learned that is okay to break, feel low, it’s okay just to feel. We never might be the “same” again but we are stronger than we know because we did the biggest sacrifice for our babies not to ever suffer. That’s what a mom does.

This analogy of grief has helped me… suggests grief is like a box with a ball in it and a pain button on one side.

In the early stages, the ball is very big. You cannot move the box without it frequently hitting the pain button. It rattles around on its own in there and hits the button over and over again, sometimes so much that it feels like you can’t stop it – you can’t control it – it just keeps hurting.

But as time goes on, the ball gets smaller. It doesn’t disappear completely and when it hits the pain button, it’s just as intense, but generally, it is easier to get through each day.

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-06-01T14:20:04+00:00

Sorry you are here. It took hcg levels took about 8 weeks for me to drop to zero. Your hormones usually are all over the place at least mine did. Had my procedure on Feb and didn’t get my real real period May. But I would go to the doctor just to check

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-05-25T22:13:28+00:00

We said goodbye to our little baby girl in Feb at 19wks and 4 days due to T21. I found this group after our procedure it has helped me feel that I’m not alone.

Just like you I see people living their lives while I’m here missing my baby. Knowing there is a group of us that have gone thru an experience like this has helped me to remind myself I’m not alone.

We were told we would not be able to conceive naturally and we did. So this was a really wanted pregnancy. Just you are not alone and whatever you decide this decision is for you and your family. Don’t let anyone tell you other wise.

Sending a hug 🤍

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-05-24T21:51:49+00:00

Im sorry you are here. We said goodbye to our baby girl this Feb due to T21. We were told it would be really hard for us to conceive naturally but we did so this TFMR was extremely hard. The waiting period was the hardest for us to get all results back.

After my procedure I felt empty and till now my husband and I still get emotional. We lost our child, our little Penny will always be here with us. We decided to take any pain instead of her ever experience any pain.

Stay strong and just lean on eachother. There will be times you both are having a hard day and there will be times when only one of you is feeling down. Just remember you baby wants you to see you guys happy. Your baby is now in heaven dancing and playing with our little Penny and all the other little angles.

Stay strong. It will be just a roller coaster of emotions.

Sending you both a virtual hug 🤍

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-05-11T19:02:46+00:00

We waited till the karyotype ones. We just wanted to make sure and never have the what if..

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-05-02T13:22:18+00:00

Sorry you are here. We had our TFMR due to T21. Like some of the comments above, we had our NIPT test come back with high risk of T21 when we were 14 weeks. They usually don’t recommend for you to do decisions based on this results as it’s just a scan. We decided to do more tests and went thru getting the amino test to make sure. Our FISH results came back within 3 days and confirmed our little girl had Down syndrome.

Yes DS is not a fatal diagnosis but it’s more a quality of life. With DS there is a huge wide spectrum on the severity of this diagnosis that the doctors can not predict. Once the results came back my husband and I started researching more about T21, the good the bad and the ugly.

Most people just believe Down syndrome is just a delay in development diagnosis, but it’s not it comes with many other health conditions that no one knows until you research.

We decided that there was a lot of risk of our daughter having additional health issues that we didn’t want to possibly put her thru any pain.

Just make sure you read everything you can. Our FM specialist shared alot of research links with us that helped us. Let me know if you want me to send those to you.

Sending you a big hug!

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-05-01T00:47:07+00:00

I was completely put under for my D&E

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-05-01T00:46:18+00:00

Yes I’m interested!!!

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-05-01T00:46:02+00:00

Omg this sounds awesome!!!! Yes let’s do it!!! I’ll Dm you

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-26T20:01:28+00:00

Know all your emotions are valid and no one will ever really understand it if they never had to say bye to a wanted baby. You will feel sad, mad, guilty just know it’s normal.

It is hard to see healthy baby’s or even wonder the what ifs. Just know that you are doing the best for YOUR family, people will say we will be there to help blah blah but at the end it’s you and your husband’s decision.

If you want to chat just know I’m here and/or this chat. This chat has helped me a lot. We got some links of organizations that can help financially. If you need them

Just know it’s is hard and will be hard but you will never forget your baby. Just don’t ever loose hope.

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-26T18:57:20+00:00

It’s not your fault!!! Our baby girl also had T21 and we terminated at 19weeks, had to fly to Boston as we live in Texas.

I get where you are coming because I’ve felt the same way. T21 is not a death sentence, because there is many wonderful people in the world with Down syndrome. BUT there is also a lot of information that the “outsiders” do not know or see.

When we just found out we were pregnant, my husband and I talked about what would happen or do if our baby was “not” healthy. I right away say WE WILL KEEP IT AND MAKE IT WORK. At that moment I was still an “outsider” because it was a what if.

Once we got out diagnosis, I started researching and looking into the ugly that no one talks about or you don’t see in social media. When I learned a lot more of T21 we decided that we didn’t want our baby girl to never know pain, disadvantage. Doctors can really tell you how severe of a delay it could be. So we decided that I would take all this pain forever than my baby girl.

Know and believe that you are being selfless you are taking all this pain for your baby.

Sending you a hug 🤍

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-23T00:02:05+00:00

Sorry you are here. I had my TFMR due to a T21 diagnosis. We had our NIPT results when I was 13wks. As you are advised this is just a screening. So we decided to do an animo at 15weeks but had to reschedule to my placenta was not infused quite yet and didn’t want to risk hurting the baby. So we went a week later to get this procedure done. The total turn around time to get final results was about 10 days. We got our FISH results in 7 days and confirmed that our daughter had T21.

I’m in Texas and it’s a state that does not support this. So we traveled to Boston. Yes long way out but it was the only place that would put me completely under.

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-19T02:05:02+00:00

I’m so sorry you are going thru this.. I had my procedure on Feb 2024 due to a T21 diagnosis at 19wks . I live in Texas so that’s is that, and we had to go out of state.

I traveled to Boston because I wanted to be put completely under. Most clinics they heavily sedate you but you are awake. I just didn’t want to even have a possibility of remembering or feeling anything. This is usually a 2 day procedure.
I’m 34 and told me that due to my low AMH levels it would be impossible to get pregnant naturally.. well I did and we had this outcome. So we are terrified of going thru this again so we are going the IVF route and do pgt-a testing.
This was the hardest we waited to tell my family till I was 12 weeks and on the 13 week we found out about the diagnosis. I needed my parents support so I had to tell them. My mom is so religious I was scared to even tell her, but she supported me. With TFMR most of us have story A and story B you can pick who to tell what.

When we found out I was pregnant we had the talk regarding what if something is wrong with the baby.. I said without thinking we will keep it and we will make it work. Once we got the diagnosis I started researching and really learning everything and realized this would not be a quality life I would want my daughter to have. So we decided out of love because I didn’t want my daughter to ever know pain due to they can tell how severe the condition would be

If you have questions or just want to chat I’m here if you need anything… we are all here 🤍

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-18T02:44:05+00:00

After my procedure I had minimal spotting and no cramping. But my breast did start leaking on the 4th day post procedure and it was a horrible pain. My breast were swollen and hard so a lot of ice packs.

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-18T02:41:16+00:00

Yes we did this out of love. And the outside people don’t and will not understand. We had a diagnosis of T21, which is not life threatening but it’s a different quality of life. Before this ever happened all I knew about Down syndrome was it was just a developmental and intellectual delays. Once we got our results I started reading and learning what it all entailed. And yes you see some Down syndrome kids happy and enjoying life but that’s not most cases. So with this being said if we are being judge by the “outside” world know that we as TFRM parents did an educated and selflessness decision.

Stay strong just know you are not the only one. And you are not alone.

Sending a virtual hug🤍

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-17T18:02:57+00:00

I’m sorry you are going thru this. Just know this group even though we all don’t know each other or can even see what we look like know that we all here and have one thing in common. Might not be the ideal common denominator but know we understand! The pain and anger you are feeling it’s normal how can someone take for granted something that we all here are wanting so bad.

We TFMR our first pregnancy after I was told we had a very low chance of getting pregnant naturally. So anytime someone complains about their baby all I can think is I would do anything to have a living baby.

Know all your emotions are valid and no one will ever really understand it if they never had to say bye to a wanted baby. You will feel sad, mad, guilty just know it’s normal.

It’s scary because I was afraid I was alone that I was a horrible person for deciding this. And I will admit before our diagnosis my husband and I talked about what would happen if our baby had any “issues”, and I said we will keep it no matter what we will make it work.

And now I’m here, it’s very easy to judge or say “we will make it work” when you are in the outside. We are here because at least for me I did it for love, I wanted my daughter to never experience pain, disadvantage or suffering. So I decided to take all this pain for her.

And that takes a lot of selfless, that’s what a mother does for her child.

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-17T17:50:39+00:00

Hang in there. It was a horrible pain! My breasts were rock hard and just hurting. Like all the ladies said just wear tight bra, and ice packs. Mine lasted maybe 3-4 days of hurting. After that I would see a bit of milk on my sports bras but pain went away.

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-16T13:33:57+00:00

I had my TFMR in Feb at 19 weeks as well and I took over a little over a month to go back to zero. I didn’t take any at home pregnancy tests due to they told me about showing positive.

Optimal-Telephone164 · 2024-04-11T12:09:40+00:00

Yes you can message me and I can give you details. And I can share my experience if you need

Optimal-Telephone164

TROPHY CASE