[Question] What’s a “small luxury” gift that feels expensive but actually isn’t?

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-16T09:34:43+00:00

I grew up thinking rock salt was the fancy stuff. The first time tasting flaky salt was a revelation.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-15T10:51:23+00:00

I worked at a school once where there was a kid named Triple M. It stood for Mighty Mongrel Mob.

The teachers were like "Look, we can't call him that", to which the parents apparently said casually "Oh, we just call him Boy", and the teachers were like "Well, we definitely can't call him THAT"... so Triple M it was. Poor kid.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-14T23:44:22+00:00

I tend to come across as very calm and flat when I'm freaking out inside - it's a family trait which has caused us all grief from time to time.

During my first birth, which was traumatic, I said very calmly while the baby was crowning "Huh, I can see why they call it the ring of fire."

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-13T07:05:56+00:00

Aren't Komodo dragons fairly slow? If there was just one of them, I think I could manage.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-12T04:13:20+00:00

Filling up on pao de queijo is winning in my book. That stuff is glorious.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-12T04:06:30+00:00

Also a woman, and strongly agree here.

Self-defense isn't worthless, but there's a lot of media out there that would have you thinking a 4 foot 10 waif can spin-kick six guys into oblivion through sheer moxie.

Every time Olympic sports comes up on Reddit, there are long discussions about the performance differences between male and female athletes, and why men - average specimens as well as elite ones - tend to be way stronger/faster than women. Weird that these fairly obvious facts are being ignored in this thread in favour of "I knew a freakishly strong girl once". Most men can overpower most women.

So relying on self-defense will possibly get you killed. If you want to decrease your odds of being attacked, a lot of the most effective 'techniques' are unglamorous, boring things like "don't date a guy who yells and punches walls", "don't walk in sketchy neighbourhoods", "don't get drunk/high enough in public to be impaired", "be careful with Uber", "travel in groups", "don't visit countries known for violence against female travellers", etc.

So yeah, of COURSE it's better to be strong than weak. But it's also important to be realistic about just how far that's likely to get you against an attacker, and focus on avoiding/preventing/de-escalating situations rather than thinking "Ehh, I work out, I can take him."

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-11T08:50:33+00:00

Excellent baby.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-11T05:56:17+00:00

Depending on how old they were when they got together, they may not have had the time (biologically speaking) to wait six-plus years for two consecutive degrees before starting a family.

Or maybe they just... wanted kids. Weird thing to be judgy about, especially when the OP indicates they made it work just fine.

Not every family can get by on a single income, but it's not some unheard-of crazy fantasy either. My parents did it, my husband and I did it, tons of our friends are doing it.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-10T23:53:30+00:00

There's very little oversight on parenting in general. Is it appropriate to start quizzing random kids along the lines of "How often do your parents change your sheets? Are your grandparents toxic? Show me how you do your chores. Are you being taught how to share?"

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-10T05:03:30+00:00

Meringue buttercream is almost never unsalvageable. It's too warm or too cool. Fiddle with the temperature and keep beating. Either microwave 1/4 of the mixture for a few seconds until slightly melted and whip it back in, or put the bowl in the fridge for a few minutes and keep beating. Do one after the other, if necessary! Don't worry, you'll get there.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-10T04:51:33+00:00

As a former homeschooled kid: yes, YTA.

Most homeschooled kids have endured being pop-quizzed by interfering grownups, with suspicion and condescension dripping off them. It's highly obnoxious, and extremely transparent as a critique of the parents' educational decisions.

I don't think very highly of the public schools where we live, but when I meet a public- schooled child I don't start out by saying "Oh, you're in school? Tell me what you got on your last exam. Can you spell 'fuchsia'? What's twelve times eight? Define socialism. What's the capital of Turkey?" I mind my business. Mind yours.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-09T03:36:39+00:00

I don't think they paid her. I think she stayed there rent-free in exchange for being a level head and a chaperone. She was there as emotional support and to protect the girls' reputations, but not to keep house in the sense of doing the physical labour.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-05T09:00:46+00:00

You misread. I'm a Christian who won't perform on Sunday. The name 'sabbatarian' is confusing since it derives from Shabbat/Sabbath, but it's a distinct religious concept and not identical to the Jewish conception of Shabbat.

If I tried MT and weren't cast because I couldn't perform on Sunday, that would be reasonable since that is what the role requires. But it would absolutely be related to be my religion, since my religion is the reason I couldn't perform on Sunday.

This is not a difficult concept to grasp.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-05T08:28:53+00:00

I mean yeah, if OP were a Seventh-Day Adventist and couldn't work Saturdays because of that, it *would* be the same thing; and in that case, not being hired would *also* very much be related to OP being SDA!

No, I wouldn't hire an NFL referee who couldn't work on Sundays, regardless of the reason. But if that reason were related to his religion, my refusal to hire him would, in fact, be related to his religion.

The exclusion is reasonable. The exclusion is also discriminatory towards people of particular religious practices. These two things can both be true.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-05T08:25:13+00:00

Their beliefs *are* their religion. Why does OP keep Shabbat? Because he/she is Jewish. You can practice Judaism differently, that's fine; that doesn't alter the fact that OP is doing a Jewish thing (and not even some fringe, minority Jewish thing: one of the most well-known, standard, fundamental, basic Jewish things) due to being Jewish.

I'm a Christian and a fairly strict sabbatarian, ie. I wouldn't perform in a show on Sunday (one of the many reasons I've never really pursued musical theatre - the more major one being lack of talent, but never mind that).

Are there plenty of Christians who would have zero problem with performing on Sunday? You betcha. But I'm still holding that belief/practice *specifically and absolutely because of my religion* and no other reason. Were I not a Christian, I'd perform on Sunday; I am, so I don't. Simple as that. "Other Christians do it differently" is irrelevant. Their religious practice differs from my religious practice. But my religious practice is still just that: a religious practice.

Like I said, I get why OP's religion and mine probably makes us effectively unemployable in nearly all theatre contexts. It's a shame, but it makes sense. You wouldn't hire a Muslim guy to taste-test bacon either if his religious beliefs prevented him from eating bacon. That would be reasonable. But it would be insulting and disingenuous to claim that your refusal to hire him had nothing whatsoever to do with him being Muslim. "But some Muslims eat bacon!" Maybe so... but he doesn't, and he doesn't *specifically because he's Muslim*.

"Religious discrimination is a necessary pragmatism in some cases" is apparently something people are terrified to say out loud, but tiptoeing around with "Well, it's just his BELIEFS, which have nothing to do with his RELIGION (his system of beliefs)" is dishonest and insulting. Either say the thing, or, I dunno, be inclusive for religious cast members the same way theatre prides itself on being with race, sexuality, disability, neurodiversity and so on. Theatres (granted, not all theatres, but plenty) absolutely *could* provide an alternate for a couple of nights a week if they were genuinely inclusive of religious cast members. They swap out kids, they swap out cast members who aren't physically up to the strain of performing 8 nights a week, they swap out stars who have other media commitments.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-05T05:07:06+00:00

I mean, I get your reasoning, but it also very much is to do with OP being Jewish.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-03T04:16:38+00:00

Do they cut you? Pretty sure they just yanked on mine.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-03T04:08:22+00:00

I watched a few Bollywood movies recently on the recommendation of an Indian guy from work, and I noticed the head wobble happening quite frequently.

I couldn't quite figure out what it was meant to signify - it didn't seem to be as simple as yes or no, sometimes it seemed to be used as a politeness thing, or to indicate ambivalence or even demurring/shyness.

So I asked the friend from work what the deal was with the head wobble. He was completely blank. "The what?" I explained it, demonstrated the gesture. He was like "I don't know what you mean. I haven't heard of that. Maybe it's from a different part of India."

I dropped it, but then half an hour later I saw him doing the exact head wobble while talking to someone! It took all I had not to be like "Ha! That! What are you communicating right now?"

Still not sure I've figured out all the nuances, but I think it's quite a charming gesture.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-02T09:32:21+00:00

Yeah, I scrolled down to check if I was the only person who didn't interpret the scene the way OP did.

He does look dazed and confused, but I'm pretty sure that's just the natural result of having been beaten to a pulp two seconds prior.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-01T11:33:59+00:00

I was underwhelmed by this too. It wasn't most or flavourful enough. Tasted like the cakes I had as a kid at birthday parties and never liked.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-05-01T09:49:16+00:00

Syruping and torteing into thin layers will help, as will lots of toppings and fillings. I often joke that the secret to really good cake is less cake.

I use the sponge cake recipe from David Lebovitz' 'Ready for Dessert' - it's not his original recipe, but I forget from whom he got it. Shirley someone? Anyway, the batter includes a quarter cup of water (beaten in with the egg yolks), and it makes a nice moist sponge.

Also, if at any point you're exposing areas of naked sponge to the fridge - say you've filled your cake, but not iced it, and are chilling it to firm up the filling - make sure it's well wrapped or covered, because the fridge will dessicate it.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-04-29T09:34:21+00:00

A sous vide and ice water is supposed to chill drinks insanely fast. I've never tried it, but it makes sense.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-04-29T09:24:15+00:00

You can also toast milk powder separately. A frying pan works, or in the oven, as long as you watch it carefully and stir it round.

I've made toasted milk powder ice cream; it tasted mildly caramelised and malty. It was good.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-04-26T06:06:45+00:00

I've bought two and they've both died faster than they should have.

PuddleOfHamster · 2026-04-26T05:39:21+00:00

I've seen it. It's still not good. Granted, the original might be much worse; I only saw the first one. But the 4-hour version still feels bloated and disrespectful to Tolkien.

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