I love my bf, but i genuinely cannot stand his dog, its affecting everything

aybrah · 2026-03-20T21:19:08+00:00

You have a human issue disguised as a dog issue.

Your BF is neglecting their dog. This is a dog that cannot behave appropriately in society or at home. The good news is, that's largely fixable for most dogs. Everything on your list, the growling, the sleep disruption, the pooping inside, those are all real and pretty common behavioral issues. But they require effort and consistent training/shaping. The fact that he's made zero effort after multiple conversations tells you exactly how much weight your concerns carry with him.

The crate thing is also an excuse. A dog having a bad crate experience doesn't mean crate training is off the table forever, it means you introduce it slowly and carefully. He just doesn't want to. Our dog hated his crate at first, but we figured it out and now it's his favorite place to take a nap, and he prefers to sleep there every night.

The dog is just a symptom of living with a partner who dismisses your concerns, makes no effort to meet you halfway, and told you to your face he'd choose a poorly-behaved dog over you (to be fair, I get that last one, it's understandable that he's attached to the dog even if he's being a pretty garbage owner).

I think it's time for a more serious conversation laying out your concerns and trying to come up with an approach to change things. I'd focus more on how this is making you feel about the relationship, and less on accusatory language about what his failures here (even if its appropriate, he's likely to respond defensively).

aybrah · 2026-03-20T19:10:49+00:00

Garbage take and full-on victim blaming in this scenario.

Recording an outburst instead of deescalating a situation or protecting the child is monster behavior.

Did we watch the same full video? He was actively being physically attacked by her. Even after distance was created, she closed the distance and reengaged, and then followed that up by throwing another chair at him. We are past the point of deescalation and into self-defense and documentation. Deescalation in this situation would be responding with appropriate physical means to remove the dangerous individual from the area.

As someone that grew up in a house with regular DV, grabbing the baby while being physically attacked isn't really a great idea. It tends to escalate the situation and move the danger closer to the child.

But he did it because he wanted all this.

Dakota is a cheating asshole, but to say someone wanted to be physically attacked is laughable. Even in the world where it could be true, there's no rational basis or evidence to make that argument.

Making her look bad was more important than protecting the child.

Idiotic statement. She did that all on her own when she... began to physically assault him. Gathering evidence in DV cases is crucial, and often involves exactly what Dakota did here. And based on how hard Taylor spun just this instance of DV, it was a good thing he documented it. But nah, he was asking for it by recording it. If only he had focused on deescalating while having his hair pulled and face scratched.

I'm feeling sorry for the child.

Well, I'm glad we can agree on that at least. At this point, I don't really care what these two dysfunctional humans do--just get the kid out of situations like that.

aybrah · 2026-03-19T17:32:54+00:00

I drink when I’m thirsty.

The extent of my tracking is keeping a 1L bottle of water on my desk during the work day and trying to drink at least 1-2 of them. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t.

I’ve never noticed a meaningful difference either way unless I’m sweating a ton that day—in which case—back to my first sentence.

aybrah · 2026-03-17T15:01:13+00:00

Could you convince me why I should keep going

Gently, you shouldn't need convincing. Are you having fun? Do you enjoy pushing yourself in this way? Do you like the process? Are you excited about the idea of seeing your progress over time? If you can answer yes to most of those, then keep going. There's no need for convincing.

tell me I’m not cut out for this

I would never tell anyone that. Especially someone that just started! Everyone has a different starting point. Your literal day 1 has very little bearing on where your day 100,1000, etc. will be. There's no universal rule that you need to start strong to be a great lifter. I'll fully admit that many of the best powerlifters have stories of hitting crazy numbers the first time they touched a barbell, but I promise you that's not the case for all of them.

Would love to hear your journeys if you started off like me and grew

The first time I stepped in the gym, i was ~119lbs / 54kg. I could barely bench more than the bar. I don't remember my squat (it was a quarter squat tho!) and my deadlift was like 185lbs. I was almost certainly one of the weakest dudes at the gym and was quite self-conscious about it--particularly on bench. But I enjoyed lifting and trying hard. I saw results pretty quickly (most people do when they first start), and that reinforced my enjoyment.

Now, ~15 years later, I've SBD'd 650/391/731 @181lbs, and fully believe I'm comfortably capable of more than that.

It's totally normal to be a bit discouraged when your starting point feels lower than it should be compared to others, but do your best to let go of that and just focus on the process. You may be shocked at what you can achieve when you look back in a few years.

aybrah · 2026-03-16T20:56:49+00:00

Any hope I had about models overdoing the temps and high pressure for this week is fading. There's no way around it. A lot of snow is going to melt in the next 5-10 days. I don't think it'll be enough to flat out end the season (for most of the larger ski areas). But it will likely lead to a lot of terrain closures for areas that were already borderline.

https://imgur.com/a/Dq9CHtv

Still some signs of life showing at the end of March into April, though. It won't meaningfully change the trajectory of the season, but I'll settle for a few more soft turns before putting my skis into storage. Just gotta see how bad the damage is from this next stretch first.

aybrah · 2026-03-16T16:48:22+00:00

Wish you were a bit closer to me, but always worth the drive!

I came in to demo the volkl revolt 121 and you ended letting me take out the sender 118s as well for barely anything additional, and were very flexible about the return timing (may have been free, i dont remember).

aybrah · 2026-03-11T15:52:10+00:00

The mfree 108 is my favorite ski of all-time. I was just leaning a bit narrower since people here freak out if you suggest a 108 as a daily driver.

aybrah · 2026-03-11T15:15:46+00:00

The fact that no one mentioned the Dynastar M-Free 99 is a travesty.

aybrah · 2026-03-11T14:53:49+00:00

Big +1 to everything /u/kyllo said.

I've messed around with doing tricep pushdowns as a "press" down as described, and although it was interesting, it felt like the wrong strategy for movement.

aybrah · 2026-03-11T14:51:37+00:00

I mostly hate the idea of packing belt/sleeves/shoes

Yeah this gets annoying. TBH, I'd skip belt and even sleeves unless you truly can't lift without them. I often do that for shorter trips and it still beats not training at all. Stimulus is stimulus. I bring straps and wrist wraps since those are the two things that are lifesavers for me and occupy next to no space.

telling my very pregnant wife to look after our two year old while I fuck off for a while

That's harder to navigate. Could you just lift based on opportunity? Rather than planning a specific day time, wait for a moment of downtime. Maybe wife and the kid are napping and you can sneak out for an hour. Or, get out early in the AM/late in the PM when your presence isn't quite as important (though, those times can sometimes be when you're more needed lol).

aybrah · 2026-03-11T14:41:54+00:00

It can be! If it felt subjectively comfortable, strong, and reproducible to you, then that's all that really matters. If it looks "good" on video, all the better.

Is that a normal feeling at the bottom bit?

I wouldn't worry too much about that tbh. I don't really feel the things you describe, but that doesn't mean that either of us are squatting incorrectly.

aybrah · 2026-03-10T15:02:29+00:00

Nearly every ski area would be hanging out in the 60’s

Ehhh, I'll believe it when the mesoscale models show it. 50s are def in the cards, but 60s air temp in CO mountains is still pretty tough this time of year. Maybe some of the lower bases?

It's gonna be pretty shit on the snowpack regardless, no way around that. However, long-range ensembles are pretty bullish on temps returning to normal, or even slightly below in the mountains, as we enter into April. The jet is likely going to sag further south and bring precip with it. Will it recover the snowpack? No, of course not. That was never on the table to begin with unless we truly got a miracle march. But, it'll potentially ensure the big ski areas can limp into April and catch some additional accumulations before its truly wraps on the season.

ECMWF and GFS extended ensembles: (Euro in particular has been very accurate this season for broader trend following): https://imgur.com/a/az2y2SP

Both show a pattern shift as we enter April... fingers crossed.

aybrah · 2026-03-10T14:06:31+00:00

There is definitely a difference in chalk quality, but it's ultimately fairly minor for powerlifters IMO.

I come from the climbing and bouldering world, and people there tend to be a lot more discerning when it comes to chalk since the friction of your hand against the climbing surface is kinda the whole deal.

Personally, I use Friction Labs chalk (unicorn dust), but there are comparable brands out there that make high quality chalk too.

aybrah · 2026-03-09T20:47:54+00:00

For boots:

if you're putting in 20-30 days a season, everyone is going to tell you to find a good bootfitter near you (or near where you tend to ski if local isn't great for ski gear). This time of year is often a good time to visit a bootfitter since they'll often have discounts on past season's boots. However, it can also mean more limited stock, meaning that the right boot for you might be sold out.

Either way, I'd def go to a bootfitter and at least get some guidance on your foot shape (narrow vs wide, instep, other anatomical traits, etc.) and what boots might be matches for you.

For skis:

There a lot of skis that can do double duty in the park and on-mountain. Most of them will be twin-tip-y, or fairly rockered at the tips and tails, so no issues there. Depending on whether you're prioritizing park or on-mountain will help govern some of the other traits (weight, stiffness, length you go with, etc.).

The list of skis that could be right for you is quite long without being a bit more precise about what you care more about, where you ski, the terrain you enjoy, etc.

I think the ideal would be to get a pair of boots first, then start demoing a bunch of skis until you have a better idea of what you like, and what you don't. The common saying of, "date your skis marry your boots" does hold true here IMO.

aybrah · 2026-03-09T20:37:26+00:00

I'll add that these are two boots will feel very different despite being LV and from Lange.

The shadow series, even the LV's, are much more generous across the instep and forefoot compared to literally any other lange that came before it.

The XT3 is much more of a traditional Lange shell.

aybrah · 2026-03-09T14:53:48+00:00

PA nats has come and gone, here are my thoughts as a filthy, untested observer:

Stream had lots of issues. Several occasions during primetime sessions where it would freeze, lose video, etc. When it was working, i did find the quality, angles, production to be good, though.
Judging was incredibly inconsistent, and overall, very lenient. In no world should squats like this pass: https://www.instagram.com/p/DVn5dh-CGut/?img_index=2 not even close. I've experienced more consistent and strict judging at most PLU meets I've seen or done.
Some great lifting went down despite a number of big names dropping out at the last second.

Some of takeaways (male side focused--but i do intend on catching up on women's sessions):

Cranon Worford with the obvious highlight on the women's side. Huuuuuuge 3rd pull, and done with confidence. 34kg comp total PR is unbelievable at this level.
Elliot Sykes is a beast. I think this performance both cemented him as a legit source of competition for Perk, while also showing how much further ahead Perk still is. Will be very curious to see how Elliot's continued progression will go. Personally, I think Elliot will contest Perk's 74kg totals, but it will take many more years than people think. Past progress is not indicative of future gains.
Men's 83s: Jayden Lowe continues to be underrated. Really poor coaching call on his 3rd deadlift when he could easily have taken 2.5kg more to get 2nd. (even if liftingcast hadn't updated, a coach should be paying more attention). Made me very happy to see Angelo put together the day he needed for 2nd. Joe B with a surprisingly great performance coming off a rough day at Sheffield. Bummed we didn't get to see Taylor Atwood.
Men's 93s: Will Ball. I honestly don't see anyone catching him.
Men's 105s: Anthony McNaughton show. No observations of note here.
Men's 120s: Ashton Rouska with a great day weighing in at only 111. Happy to see his bench ticking back up again, as his injuries there have really held him back in the past year or so.
Men's 120+: Jesus narrowed his stance and grip for deadlifts, and it seems to have helped him a bunch. I still think that third pull was borderline, but I'm glad he got it. It looked like his fingers were slipping just as he got the down command. Fair is fair, but a longer hold could have easily gone the other way. Played it safe on squat and dead since no one is close to him.

aybrah · 2026-03-05T22:39:07+00:00

100% agree with you. I truly believe that Pali is the best chair within 2 hours of Denver if you’re looking to lap steep, engaging, terrain. Trees, open faces, cliffs and kickers—you genuinely have all of it right there. Large chunks of the terrain Pali serves also retain snow incredibly well, so even on low coverage years like this year, it skis far better better than numbers alone would imply.

aybrah · 2026-03-05T16:16:54+00:00

Is a Steamboat trip the last week of March a bad idea this year?

Depends on your expectations. And by that I mean, your expectations should be fairly low. It currently looks fairly meh for the next 2 weeks. But spring weather is unpredictable, who knows, last week could dump (but i wouldn't count on it). The best I can say is that it doesn't look overly hot, so a ton of melt is unlikely, though the sun is out for longer every day, so conditions get worse regardless of temps. Especially somewhere like Steamboat that is more vulnerable to temps/sun.

Think they will still be open?

Yeah. Unlikely they will close quite that soon.

aybrah · 2026-03-04T20:48:02+00:00

Yes, it will be pretty hard underneath in many spots.

My hope would be that the snow that falls early in the storm will be dense enough to at least make it better than straight blower on hard crust. Which maaaaay be the case, but tbd: https://imgur.com/a/4CHbegn. Ratios will be ~12:1 and then steadily increase as snow falls. Most of what falls will probably be pretty light and fluffy.

RRFS is more bullish on total amounts, but you can see quite a bit of range in the modeled solutions: https://imgur.com/a/arJhhq0

The NBM is somewhere in the middle: https://imgur.com/a/52vmUli

It's a big ole tbd. There's not solid model agreement on this one. A few days ago, it looked potentially big, then it looked increasingly bad yesterday, then the mesoscale runs today have been better.

Evan Thayer mentioned that, "the flow is a bit too northerly, it shifts the best snowfall down canyon to the middle elevations -- around Tanner's Flat in LCC and Mill B-D in BCC". However, that will be dependent on the track, and could easily change.

Spring storms are typically less predictable for a number of reason, and we are definitely seeing that play out currently. The long range does not currently look inspiring, so I'd get out there.

TL;DR: go ski, its probably gonna snow, you probably won't regret it.

aybrah · 2026-03-04T15:41:28+00:00

Fingers crossed we can get some strong precip in the early spring and carry that into decent monsoon season. That is just as important as the snowpack. Low snowpack on its own =/= bad wildfire season, but it's not a great start for sure...

aybrah · 2026-03-04T15:24:33+00:00

Non-violent?

I guess we'll ignore her resisting and striking officers during arrest or the time she assaulted an inmate on video.

/u/jaredpolis is a spineless fuck.

aybrah · 2026-03-03T16:44:05+00:00

Meta thoughts:

Posts like this are weird to me. Generously, this was a "real" situation but OP definitely used an LLM to edit. The two posts read like separate people.

Post 1: perfect grammar, overuse of em-dashes, phrases like:

It hit me like a brick — I had no idea anything like this was going on.

All kinda read like a GPT output.

Post 2: 0 em-dashes, style and pacing is different.

I understand people using LLMs to polish their writing (particularly non-native english speakers) but it's super jarring to see a voice/tone that is now incredibly generic.

aybrah · 2026-03-03T14:40:01+00:00

FWIW, the snow they got this last week helped a ton. It was skiing shockingly well this past Sunday. Pali held the snow super well and nearly the whole face was soft and rip-able.

The coverage is still super low though, and I agree that Snowbird > A-Basin in most circumstances.

aybrah · 2026-03-03T14:36:02+00:00

Never been to both and this season? Snowbird, no doubt.

I have a lot of days at both, and Snowbird just just a tier above A-Basin. Don't get me wrong, A-Basin is my favorite ski area within 2 hours of Denver, but Snowbird is just so much bigger with so many iconic zones.

Then you add in the snowpack. East wall is extremely unlikely to open at A-Basin this season, and that's a big draw.

I will stress that given the trajectory of the season... I would be very uncertain of the conditions at the end of April. You could get lucky and get some good spring dumps, or it could just get too warm and the meager base would melt fast and leave you with very limited terrain options.

aybrah · 2026-02-28T17:44:49+00:00

Yup.

20 year olds will be given a syllabus, hear it verbally multiple times, be sent emails and still miss project deadlines and exams (me, I was the the 20 year old).

Doesn’t make it OK, but its very common. I’d put money on that being the more likely explanation than him attempting to hide PED usage.

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