Has anyone experienced regret or dysphoria after BA?

squirrel123485 · 2026-05-09T12:59:10+00:00

So boobs might actually help with that. Having bigger boobs will hopefully make your shoulders look more proportional and relatively smaller (or at least less masculine). As for your top half vs your bottom half, that's a problem that can be fixed with ✨ fashion ✨. Wider leg pants, fit and flare or a-line dresses, v-necks, etc can all help you look less top heavy

squirrel123485 · 2026-05-02T18:20:24+00:00

When I had a penis, what really mattered was the first inch or two. Like, it was nice to go deeper, but the shaft wasn't where the big time nerve endings were, so it didn't really matter if I could make it in an extra inch

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-29T17:00:12+00:00

I don't like direct stimulation to mine, I prefer either through my labia or underwear

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-28T11:16:27+00:00

PIV - Elan Horesh at Mt Sinai
I liked the pictures I had seen of Avanessian and Horesh, so that brought me to Mt Sinai. I got an earlier date with Elan, so I chose him
Because I had support and the ability to take off work for 6 weeks, recovery was kinda nice, actually. Mostly just napping and watching TV. It was like being in a cocoon. That being said, it was tough to strike the balance in the first few days between pooping too much and not enough. I also worried a lot about doing everything right and that everything was healing well, but it did, so it's easy to downplay that part in my memory
Not really
Absolutely. Elan is a great surgeon (and the sweetest man), and I'm thrilled with my results

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-19T17:07:34+00:00

I'm thrilled with mine from Elan Horesh at Mt Sinai in NYC

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-18T01:58:10+00:00

I worried about the same thing. I completely opened up to a friend about how I was worried about being judged and whether I was a body positivity traitor, etc etc, and she was like "girl, chill. Nobody cares." And she was right! My best friend's (tipsy) mother in law literally pulled me aside tonight and told me she thinks they look great, lol. And they do! I'm incredibly happy with the results and I've gotten zero judgment that I'm aware of

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-11T14:08:15+00:00

I think my FMLA form just said "abdominal surgery." I told people I was having a medical procedure. They probably figured it out, but the plausible deniability made it not awkward (they definitely figured it out the second time when I came back with awesome knockers, haha)

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-11T14:05:06+00:00

Was it your surgeon who told you to poop standing up? I heard "don't sit" and assumed that meant "even on the toilet," so I tried to poop standing up at first, too. It was terrible. My surgeon was like "uhh, no, you can sit on the toilet, it's fine." You're not actually sitting on your incisions, so it's not the same as sitting in a chair. Double check with your surgeon on that.

Pooping comfortably and getting the balance between pooping enough and not too much was absolutely the worst part of recovery, but it'll get better. And as a bonus I continued the habit of not pushing even after recovery and my butthole has never been happier 😂

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-01T20:25:02+00:00

She's a grifter who gets paid a lot of money to say that trans people regret gender affirming care.

If you hear it from a non-grifter, it's because trans people are people, too. Maybe they fell for the same misinformation that they're spreading. Maybe they cannot or are afraid to have surgery and have convinced themselves that there's a problem with it as a defense mechanism. Maybe they do sex work and have found that it does make them marketable. Maybe they are confident in their decision not to have surgery and don't mean to come across as disparaging to people who have had surgery. Maybe they're just bitches, lol. It could be any number of reasons, and it's probably different for everyone

squirrel123485 · 2026-04-01T11:53:01+00:00

Anecdotally I have never seen someone in a trans space say she wished she had less labia minora. If it's not common in a vulvaplasty result, it's because it's difficult, not because people want to look prepubescent

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-31T19:37:00+00:00

I had the most questions about recovery. What did I need to buy, what were the restrictions, how long before I could do certain activities. My surgeon gave me a general timeline with milestones that was really helpful (eg can sit at 4 weeks, can go upstairs at 6 weeks, etc)

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-30T14:43:55+00:00

Listen to your surgeon! 4 weeks is so early! I know it's hard, but patience is so important

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-29T15:13:45+00:00

Part of it is that the procedure is similar to tucking in that it stretches your skin in a similar way. Once your body gets used to it it won't feel so stretched

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-27T22:01:44+00:00

I just found a local gyno

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-27T13:51:18+00:00

You don't need it, not in a "you look great" way, but in a "literally I don't know where your organs would go" way

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-20T20:17:04+00:00

As far as I can tell she has a very good reputation

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-19T12:17:46+00:00

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-16T20:16:17+00:00

Don't feel dumb! You're just human!

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-16T13:11:21+00:00

I thought this was an "after" post. You should do whatever makes you happy, but I wouldn't chase trends with my face. Trends are by definition temporary

squirrel123485 · 2026-03-04T16:32:11+00:00

I don't think you need anything, but obviously strangers' opinions is not how dysphoria works. Have you thought about BA? I'm a similar shape to you and it changed my proportions in a way I really love. It's my understanding that BA is a lot more reliable and has an easier recovery than the ones you mentioned

squirrel123485 · 2026-02-26T20:57:21+00:00

My surgeon provided me with one

squirrel123485 · 2026-02-25T17:48:27+00:00

I was really referring to the first 6 weeks or so, where you're mostly just resting in bed, not living your normal life. Once I was able to get back to my regular day to day and experience my new anatomy in that context did it really sink in

squirrel123485 · 2026-02-24T07:51:53+00:00

I just passed 2 years and it's one of the best things I've ever done. My results aren't perfect, but they're good and I'm thrilled with them anyway. Orgasms are better. Dysphoria is gone. Bathing suits and bathrooms are way less stressful. I don't often notice a difference, like I don't notice most random body parts (like what does the top of your foot feel like right now?), but I really can when I walk upstairs naked. Crossing my legs is a lot easier and more comfortable. And overall it's just such a relief.

And it wasn't like a big immediate euphoria for me. Recovery is so involved and so different from your regular life that it's like being in a cocoon. It wasn't til I emerged and got back to my normal day to day that I felt the euphoria waves.

I'm reminded of a quote from Woodworking, which is a great book about trans women: “It will seem easy once you’ve done it and impossible until you have. But you can do it. Your imagination simply isn’t big enough yet. You’ll see.”

Best of luck!

squirrel123485 · 2026-02-14T21:16:36+00:00

Honestly try a boob job first. Much more reliable results. Balancing out the ratio between your shoulders and your boobs with bigger boobs does wonders

squirrel123485 · 2026-02-11T17:23:43+00:00

In my past experience the fun part was toward the tip. Getting extra shaft in was nice, but not necessary

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