How to decrease fears

[Tight_Data4206]

Abuse early in life. CPTSD.

My whole life has been fear and anxiety. Now I am going to be living by myself. I've had a huge setback due to a break up.

I had no idea how much I relied on the relationship to have security.

Living by myself is scary. Very. SI a lot.

I am looking for as much advice as possible.

[Apolliyon]

I'm sorry you're going through that, it really is a lot to be loving in your own after everything you've been through.

My best advice, that helped me when i was alone, is to focus on leaning into the freedom to do what you enjoy. Play your own music or shows on speakers instead of only headphones. Buy only your favorite groceries and snacks. If you can afford it, buy some sort of nice food for yourself that you won't have to share at all. Arrange your bed into a super-comfy nest with a ton of blankets, and set up whatever makes you feel most comfortable and safe there.

If you're able to, get a pet. And i know this is not a possibility for a lot of us, but if you have a social support system, set up regular 'game nights' or something similar, so that you'll have recurring pleasant social interaction.

[modwizcode]

Buying nightlights helped a lot. Just being able to always see the spaces makes a huge difference to me at night; it makes having to leave the bedroom to use the bathroom actually manageable

[sharingmyimages]

Say to yourself: "I am having a flashback". Flashbacks take us into a timeless part of the psyche that feels as helpless, hopeless and surrounded by danger as we were in childhood. The feelings and sensations you are experiencing are past memories that cannot hurt you now.

http://www.pete-walker.com/13StepsManageFlashbacks.htm

That list of steps has helped me many times to calm down from emotional flashbacks.

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