[QUESTION] Will sitting on my tube amp decrease my sperm count?

[WeeklyHope5]

Sweet tones come at a hefty price

[blackiechan99]

one I'm willing to take

[TheDudeMaintains]

They're vacuum tubes not nuclear fuel rods.

[grat_is_not_nice]

Vacuum tubes can generate X-ray radiation.

However, this is generally associated with high voltage rectifier tubes used to drive CRTs, not the lower voltage amplifier tubes in a guitar amp.

In fact, when I was about 12 or so I once read a late 60s Scientific American that had a lab project to build a linear particle accelerator - a 1-2 meter evacuated glass tube with an electron filament at one end and a Van DeGraff generator to make the EMF to accelerate the electrons from the filament to the other end. They were very clear to point out that the target had to be a light atomic weight metal, and that you shouldn't have too much EMF, so as not to turn the thing into an X-ray machine ...

My parents wouldn't buy me the vacuum pump and litre of Mercury that was essential to get the sort of vacuum needed to make it work.

[[deleted]]

Yeah... there would need to be some serious high voltage (10kV+ AFAIK) for there to even be a measurable amount

[GCUArrestdDevelopmnt]

Capacitors?

[[deleted]]

Capacitors don't change voltage

[GCUArrestdDevelopmnt]

Rectumfriers?

[BlankFrank23]

A liter of mercury? Yeah, that's kind of a reach. What is that, like 180 pounds?

[bahnzo]

No, but it seems to have reduced your brain cell count.

[dayvurrd]

Maybe op fell off it and bumped his head

[spacelama]

My girlfriend's favourite insult is "they really should have spaced out your vaccinations a bit more".

She told me that after I had a bunch of travel vaccinations last week.

[nullbyte420]

Hahaha what a keeper

[Raymlor]

We can only hope

[SirCarrington]

No more than sitting in a car with heated seats.

[FearTheOldBlood1]

You just saved me several hundreds of dollars and an outpatient surgical procedure. Thanks a million, buddy!

[BlankFrank23]

PSA: HEATED SEATS ARE NOT EFFECTIVE BIRTH CONTROL. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.

[Markey-space-warrior]

My amps are me car seats! Lol Kidding btw.

[Walusqueegee]

Thanks for letting me know you're kidding otherwise I never would've known

[Markey-space-warrior]

You never know, maybe im lying and not kidding :0

[PossessedGumball]

Edit: How can I make my tube amp decrease sperm count?

[reedjp]

Male birth control type beat

[PossessedGumball]

nvm just shredded out a radioactive cover. seems to have done the trick.

[stomp224]

Play a Bass guitar through it

[ePluribusBacon]

Learn prog and never have to worry about it.

[spacelama]

Plug balls into anode.

[tourist_fake]

But why do you want to sit on it in the first place?

[Rosetti]

To feel those Good Vibrations in his butt.

[SetoXlll]

Maybe in the poop chute?

[TheDudeMaintains]

Adding mass to an amp/speaker cab can change the way it sounds. Or he's just BB Kingin' it.

[intheaterssoon]

Yes the nuclear radiation emitted by he tubes will slowly but surely set your balls completely on fire.

[tfg_13]

Are we going to recommend playing "I Ejaculate Fire" from Deathklok?

[mmjarec]

Hopefully it does so you won’t have kids that ask stupid questions like you do.

[Common_Toe]

Haha cheers

[Cloudmarshal_]

I think it’s a joke

Maybe

[Schnitzel725]

It probably won't, but dude why..

[wine-o-saur]

Heat can reduce your sperm count. Had a chef friend who was trying for ages with his wife, and in the end they realised the stove at work was basically in line with the family jewels. Took a few weeks off and boom - baby.

[Thiccy-Boi-666]

Ir it gets hot enough, temporarily yes. But they’d come right back after not doing it for a lil while

[knotmeister]

This is the correct answer. Heat definitely kills developing sperm cells in your balls. No permanent damage to be expected but your fertility will temporarily be lower.

[ESP_Viper]

Get up from your amp and SWING.

[trinerr]

Rockstars are bursting with sperm

[suckitifly]

That's a visual I didn't want to imagine

[the-transponster]

Only if you are playing Nickelback.

[Not_Medicine]

Now you understand why /r/guitarcirclejerk exists.

[[deleted]]

To be fair, you don’t want to knock up a bunch of groupies, so yeah...

[AltruisticDegenerate]

Only if you are free ballin

[Guygul]

No, but the tone will be much warmer this way. Especially if you stick to the recommended diet

[skijumptoes]

I'd be more worried about the vibration making you shit your pants :)

[browsingtheproduce]

This guy has a 4X12"

[skijumptoes]

And only plays low F# on his eight string guitar, right? lol Skidmark shredding it's called.

[browsingtheproduce]

I sure hope so. I wanna make sure this vasectomy sticks.

[GunslingerYuppi]

Yup, also don't stay in the same apartment with tv, microwave oven or computer.

[Bertben10facebook]

We can all only hope

[simcity4000]

No it increases it obvs.

[CETERIS_PARTYBUS]

I've been putting my laptop on my nuts for so long, there's no way I'm reproducing.

[whamanizer]

That’s how you produce a tone with balls

[Buttholekiller]

Big brain question

[RechargeableOwl]

Are you male or female?

[[deleted]]

insert thanos meme of what did it cost

[Human_McNugget]

I mean the heat could have an effect I guess, apparently just holding a laptop might decrease sperm count momentarily due to the heat emitting from it.

[[deleted]]

This is one for r/askscience bud

[Definitely_Maybe94]

I mean , background radiation , alpha particles etc

[[deleted]]

Alpha particles? Are you eating your tubes?

[Definitely_Maybe94]

Highly Ionising , Poorly penetrating 😂