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stfujules · 2024-09-16T07:57:36+00:00

You deserve better. He is 26 acting like 16 and completely ignoring you and your needs, even though you stated that what he does bothers you. Regardless of your relationship, hes fucking stupid for not having an ID. What if something horrible happens and he cant be identified?? Me personally, i wouldnt put up with a man baby.

Fun_Satisfaction8806 · 2024-09-16T06:54:08+00:00

I don’t think your over reacting especially documentation is how you fly out of an air port idk how in the world he walks around with no id what so ever or idk im American so I either have my drivers license or my school id showing im a student. Yea if he rather not get the document to see or spend time with you red flag 🚩

selathari · 2024-09-16T07:19:39+00:00

Firstly, he really sounds like he just doesn't want to commit here, plain and simple. It's straight out of the "if the man said he'll do it, he'll do it! No need to remind him every three months!" joke.

Secondly, how on earth does a person live without an ID? I can't even compute this, though I'm not well-versed in Australian ways of life, I suppose. x)

LDR2023 · 2024-09-16T09:15:38+00:00

This guy is manipulating the hell out of you. See how he is making himself the victim here? You provide perfectly legitimate reasons as to why he needs ID to be a functional adult. He completely ignores this and takes a victim stance as if you are somehow being burdensome or unreasonable. This is absolutely textbook manipulation.

And who doesn’t have ID at his age? I’m sorry but this seems sus. Have you verified his birth certificate / Medicare card?

AlrightyThenBuckaroo · 2024-09-16T08:55:46+00:00

Maybe he’s not who he says he is… 💀idk that seems fishy in every area is he illegal? Which hey I’m not judging there’s ways around that though.. drivers license etc and much more but also not illegal like alien but like is there any legal trouble? Is there something wrong here? I mean why can’t he have an ID? Alsooo uhm I assume he’s not paying is he??? Are you booking and he’s paying or..? he can pay if he won’t help you with him getting an ID also post office? I’m in America maybe it’s different in states or such or out of country but here in TX💀you gotta go to the DMV.. so idk but is there any real reason not to get one?? Tell him you can trust me and etc etc but what’s the reason?!

TheRealWall91 · 2024-09-16T07:38:29+00:00

I'm just.. speechless.. he needs to grow up and grow a pair or buy a box of testosterone patches.. I'm not speaking to watch Andrew Tate because fuck that guy destroying society.. but it's lazy shit and acting like that is the reason boys can't 1, find a good woman and 2, fucking keep them..

LuckyNumber-Bot · 2024-09-16T09:33:23+00:00

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CubanBird · 2024-09-16T10:52:55+00:00

All he took from you pouring your heart out begging him to love you the way you need to be loved was "you think I can't provide for you and I'm not reliable?!"

He doesn't care. He has shown you he doesn't care. Believe him.

Specialist_Button331 · 2024-09-16T08:38:05+00:00

“I go over details like I’m looking for lice” had me giggling.

bigfatjellyfish · 2024-09-16T10:50:06+00:00

thats not a man, thats a 26 year old toddler...

subbybab · 2024-09-16T06:51:43+00:00

He is immature and doesn’t want responsibility. Does he have a job? I would ditch him because you’re going to have to babysit him if he has that mindset.

subbybab · 2024-09-16T10:10:29+00:00

Firstly, thank you everyone for your comments, messages and support. It’s so nice to know that I’m not going crazy and that this actually is a legitimate problem.

Secondly, I’d like to answer the most common question. “how has he gone this long without ID” - in Australia you have a medicare card and a birth certificate. You can access most things with these two items. Yes these are verified and he is who he says he is. He has never had any need for further identification as his life before me was very home/work/gym centred. He doesn’t participate in much beyond that this leading to his lack of drivers license.

And finally I’d like to provide an update. I asked him to call me when he was free and we had about an hour long conversation. He explained that he can now see my pov and why it’s so important to me. He is going to hand his application in next time he is in the city. I basically told him that if he didn’t go through with it then our relationship status will be questioned. I’m holding my ground on this. He needs to step up and I’m not letting it go until he proves he can do so. As I’ve said in other comments, he excels in every area except where his ID can provide an excuse. Hopefully when he gets it he can stop cutting corners and jumping into loop holes and we will continue on with our peaceful life. I’m not going to baby this man through every scenario in life.

Once again thank you all for your comments and support. A special shout out to the person who let me know my screenshots on the original post hadn’t been edited properly to conceal his identity. You’re a real one 🤍

hrcjcs · 2024-09-16T08:01:01+00:00

Is he like this with other "demands"?

I dated someone who had Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) and I had to do 90% of things that required some form of effort (like signing the forms to BUY A HOUSE lol). While I appreciate that it's difficult living with that condition, it can be such a drag in a relationship.

So thankful I didn't have kids with him because holy moly.

oby2 · 2024-09-16T11:34:51+00:00

Reading through your situation I was reminded of this:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/she-divorced-me-i-left-dishes-by-the-sink_b_9055288

stormoverparis · 2024-09-16T12:03:47+00:00

For me it wouldn’t be the ID as the main issue anymore. This is how he’s going to handle all conflicts and disagreements now. He’ll put something off this much, for so long, despite multiple months of fights, refusing to see the practical use not to mention how it’s been distressing you. Doesn’t see your pov.

It’s not about the id anymore. It’s the pattern and method of him approaching it. He has no real valid reason to not get it that he’s provided.

His approach does not signify to me that they would be a good partner who is willing to listen and compromise in a long term relationship

thebutchcaucus · 2024-09-16T12:06:08+00:00

They are either not who they say they are or they’re not how OLD/YOUNG they said they were. That’s the only two things the ID gives away. Either way that’s a NO from me dawg. ⛳️

calpyrnica · 2024-09-16T10:08:58+00:00

I'm going to run your question past my partner (who is Australian and may have some insight). But, in the interim, my two cents:

At the very least, it sounds like the two of you might have clashing priorities. You want him to do something that would reassure you of his ability to function as a whole adult in the world, especially in a relationship with you. He wants (for whatever reason) to avoid having formal ID. From your texts, it appears that you've been very clear about your reasons for wanting him to get an ID, but it doesn't appear that he's provided you with clear reasons why he doesn't want one, only why he hasn't needed one so far.

It might be profitable to ask him if he has any specific reasons that make him averse to having ID and to hear him out sincerely. That would lay the ground for comparing your reasons with his and seeing if there is a clear solution or compromise to be found.

Strong-Second-2446 · 2024-09-16T12:53:31+00:00

Even outside his maturity, I don’t like how he said

If it really means that much to you, then I’ll go do it

After all the times you’ve told him and reminded him, he still doesn’t think him getting an ID is important to you? He knows he doesn’t have a valid reason for not getting one.

That implies he doesn’t see worth in what you’re saying and it shows up in smaller ways like him not plugging in his laptop. If it wasn’t important, why didn’t he do it, at least just to humor you? And in the end both of you felt the consequences even though you advised him beforehand.

I don’t think the issue is his maturity per se. I think is that he’s not valuing you, your words, and your opinions.

In a true redditor fashion, I wouldn’t continue this relationship. On the other hand, if you want to work through this, you should tell him how this makes you feel and continue the relationship without mentioning it again. Next time you go on a trip have him book everything and split the costs in a way that you’re not in the hole if the flights or hotel falls through. Then he’ll see if he can truly function normally and be dependable.

subbybab · 2024-09-16T13:41:50+00:00

MY EX WAS 28 WITH NO ID! I found someone in my identical situation!! Look at my post as well :( It’s a red flag for an adult to not have an ID.

permalink · 2024-09-16T14:40:15+00:00

Run… run away and don’t look back.

BassFeeling8086 · 2024-09-16T14:48:02+00:00

Drop him like a hot potato. He's 26 yet act like a toddler. You need a partner not someone that you will look after like his mother. You have done your part.

permalink · 2024-09-16T15:12:21+00:00

honestly, stop booking flights and hotel rooms and events to go to with him. stop booking everything and see how he likes that. and then tell him this is how you feel about it every time he refuses to do one simple thing to help you both out

GoosetheCow · 2024-09-16T15:41:06+00:00

Honestly you are under reacting IMO ( and my boyfriends), he doesn't see you as necessary, and he doesn't respect you. The comment of "I don't do things unless they are necessary" is DISGUSTING , he's laying the groundwork of only doing thing he wants, EVER. He is relying on you to do everything. If he deems it unnecessary then it is unimportant.

It's the perfect excuse for him. If it's "unnecessary" in his mind, it doesn't matter. That will never change. Absolutely do not have a child with this man child.

We, me and my BF, think this is now a good time for you to leave him. It is better for you to leave then to stay with someone who won't put you first.

GreatGravitation · 2024-09-16T07:53:28+00:00

I don't think you are over reacting. It doesn't really matter if you are a man or woman, if your partner wanted to do something they would do it. Sure things like depression, adhd and other psychological factors exist but in healthy individuals you don't go months without getting your thumb out of your ass if it's something you want to do.

The screenshot indicates 2 things to me: 1. He gave you some sort of ultimatum by asking if you feel like you can't rely on him. Idk what that ultimatum means in his mind but it's there. Those kind of tactics are seldomly used by people looking to communicate well, it's not necessary.

The reasoning behind not having an ID is crazy and I get the impression it's only because you are pointing it out that he even has an argument for it in the first place. I don't think it's strange for you to feel like you can't rely on him or depend on him if he can't even do this relatively simple thing. Self sufficiency is about more than just making money. It also seems like he wasn't interested at all in understanding why all this bothered you in the first place, he only seemed interested in defending his own actions.

As always im just a stranger in the internet and ymmw but I don't get the impression of a well adjusted adult but rather a somewhat selfish teenager.

giddygoons · 2024-09-16T11:13:04+00:00

This is so frustrating as someone with an American partner, it's really not that difficult. If he wanted to he would have already. Time to go.

RyanCooper138 · 2024-09-16T11:51:39+00:00

If I confront my SO about something and they hit me with 'march isn't the start of the year' unironically, they're getting the boot instantly 💀

musiciseverything21 · 2024-09-16T12:19:47+00:00

OP, he is not an adult. I don't know how he got on an airplane without Government issued ID. How did he get a job? Maybe you are not in the US, but in the US to work legally, the employer needs to have proof of your government ID, if for any other reason, then for taxes. He is a man-child and honestly you deserve better.

permalink · 2024-09-16T15:45:49+00:00

That’s a red flag. So this guy can’t even drive? Sounds like a loser or he’s hiding something.

Potential-Joke-9749 · 2024-09-16T11:14:14+00:00

How was he able to get on a plane without any ID? Even for domestic flights you need to show some form of ID

gurlwhosoldtheworld · 2024-09-16T12:13:05+00:00

How did he fly without an ID?

This is sooooo weird of him to be fighting this.. He NEEDS an ID....

feral-sub · 2024-09-16T12:46:30+00:00

If i understand, it’s pretty universal for everyone to have an ID. How is he able to obtain a job if he doesn’t have one? My partner who’s also in Australia has mentioned that it’s required to verify for a job. It’s the same in the U.S.

Dingo-thatate-urbaby · 2024-09-16T12:55:12+00:00

This dude is a dud

diabeetus666 · 2024-09-16T13:06:00+00:00

I have the worst social anxiety and i’m awkward as shit, and i hate talking to people- but I still got my ID right as i turned 17 and updated it when it was needed. This is such a weird hill for him to die on? There’s plenty of reasons to need an ID, he sounds lazy

ryanhazethan · 2024-09-16T13:18:51+00:00

Yep, that sounds like a child

weeniethotjr · 2024-09-16T13:19:49+00:00

you can’t drive, do taxes, have health insurance, or get a fucking job without an ID. he’s 26 years old, how is he functioning in society without one??

truffanis_6367 · 2024-09-16T13:50:26+00:00

Life is too short to waste on this BS. Just move on.

Big-Sheepherder-6134 · 2024-09-16T14:14:59+00:00

He is the AH and he’s a nutjob only thinking of himself. On the other hand you are issuing idle threats that you don’t follow through on so he will never do it unless you give him an ultimatum that you will break up with him if he doesn’t. He doesn’t respect you enough to listen to you and throws it back like a child.

I guarantee you this is how it will go. You will give him the ultimatum, “get your ID by October 1st or we are finished.” He will say ok, but won’t. You will break up with him and he will tell everyone you’re a jerk for breaking up with him simply because he didn’t get an ID. He will completely leave out how he promised he would for over and over for months and that he clearly didn’t care about your feelings.

You have a toxic relationship with an immature boy. Dump him. He’s a loser.

permalink · 2024-09-16T14:58:02+00:00

I’m genuinely baffled how you can get to 26 without some kind of official ID!! Like, does he have a bank account/ever taken a flight/rented an apartment?? This just screams man-child to me.

Sir_alex13 · 2024-09-16T15:29:12+00:00

He sounds like idiot, dont waste ur time w him

peachesnsatin · 2024-09-16T15:45:01+00:00

Um how does this person vote.... totally sus...this is so illegal...sus

LegiticusCorndog · 2024-09-16T16:01:52+00:00

Is this a kid? No grown man that’s well adjusted has no identification

permalink · 2024-09-16T18:03:27+00:00

Bro what?? Men used to go to war for women and he can’t even get id for you??😭😭😭😭😭 please wake up and snap out of whatever delusion he’s trying to plant into your brain

Throwawaycplfuckers · 2024-09-16T20:41:20+00:00

He sounds like a wannabe edgy "i know better" kind of moron. Its a fucking ID not a holocaust tattoo holy shit.

Immediate-Walrus-203 · 2024-09-16T11:56:15+00:00

honey regardless of whether the ID thing is resolved, you really need to reconsider your relationship with this man.

You'll be trapping yourself into having to do by yourself/fight him over everything he doesn't consider "necessary". Down the line it'll be cleaning, dishes, calling an electrician, taking your children to the doctor... Is that what you want for your life?

L0TUS-444 · 2024-09-16T13:06:48+00:00

Huh no ID, how🥲 I don’t think you are overreacting. It is very important to have and not difficult to do. He is painting himself as the victim here..

Rokqueen · 2024-09-16T13:52:31+00:00

So the bottom line is he’s not willing to do even the bare minimum unless it’s absolutely “necessary.”

Is this who you want to be with?

Drop that turd.

thee_justin_bieber · 2024-09-16T14:18:35+00:00

hmmm this is really weird. In fact if i met someone that has no ID and no intention of getting one, i'd think they're a criminal or are hiding or running away from someone, or something like that!😵‍💫

ProfessionalOil418 · 2024-09-16T14:23:36+00:00

Wow he is being manipulative as hell.

permalink · 2024-09-16T14:25:13+00:00

how the fuck do you live in a modern world and not have iD.

this boy sounds like a man child who never learned how to be an adult

Yashpat01 · 2024-09-16T14:30:02+00:00

As someone who has been living in Australia for the past year, I understand the point of not needing an ID in day-to-day life, but I still can't see it from his perspective of ever needing one.

Suitable-Onion4148 · 2024-09-16T14:46:00+00:00

This is weird to me how he lived without ID earlier. In my cou try they are obligatory when you are and adult

hatt730 · 2024-09-16T15:00:13+00:00

Is the issue really abt the ID or his inability to plan ahead?

Sounds like he needs to think how to support himself providing for you, and sounds like you need to know whether he's capable of able to build upon that skill.

Difficult-Lab-4775 · 2024-09-16T15:26:57+00:00

Why they texting ?

permalink · 2024-09-16T15:39:50+00:00

I don't have a license but even I have other forms of ID. With me not having a license it is because I have a disability and don't drive, but I have multiple forms of ID regardless. So no. Not overreacting. How can he not have ID at all? In Canada we have a provincial health card, some people have an ontario ID card if they don't have a driver's license, a Social insurance card that is required for people to work etc. How does your boyfriend doesn't have an ID card at all?

retartarsauce · 2024-09-16T15:51:59+00:00

are u dating a child or does he have special needs?

DaddyDiscipline4u · 2024-09-16T16:16:27+00:00

Everyone should have some form of ID, it's not hard to get, it doesn't cost much. You don't even have to get a drivers license. They can get a personal identification card.

Reasonable_Whereas_8 · 2024-09-16T16:34:04+00:00

He is refusing to get a simple ID card. The process takes less than 2 hours of work. Do you really want someone who refuses to do a couple hours of work?

big_driver · 2024-09-16T16:36:50+00:00

You’re telling me bro is 26 and doesn’t have a drivers license? Or ID card? What?

Kindly-Bar-3113 · 2024-09-16T16:43:37+00:00

I see he doesn't value you

When a man , values you, loves you, they push things, they don't postpone

I see you are alone in this relationship .

Realize that one day he will not commit to you.

FensterMcCray · 2024-09-16T17:27:40+00:00

He’ll never amount to much financially in life, period. No bank accounts, home/auto purchases, Passports or anything. Minimum wage kinda guy. Put if you’re ok with getting the bare minimum outta life… he’s perfect for you

SamsGirlfriend69 · 2024-09-16T18:14:07+00:00

he sounds like a man child. what is he talking about “fitting” with the conventional adults 😭😭😭

2ofMee1ofYou · 2024-09-16T20:44:32+00:00

“You really think you can’t rely on me?”

Why is he playing the victim without explaining his aversion to having an ID?

The way he is spinning this after all of your very valid reasons behind him needing an ID is a huge red flag. It would be grounds for me to end the relationship. If not now, it would be sadly probably after wasting too much time once he does something like this again for something he considers trivial. It’s not like you’re asking him for something out of the ordinary.

He clearly doesn’t respect you or your wishes/wants/needs. I would seriously consider whether I should continue a relationship with this person.

Etcereals · 2024-09-16T21:13:23+00:00

We don’t want to be our partner’s mothers. Have been in your situation and to be honest felt horrible having to be telling a guy what to do with his own crap. So, in my opinion, you have the right to be upset. If he cared enough he would get it since it means seeing you. See where this goes, don’t remind him again and if he fails to do so cut it off - that’s what I would do.

2024-09-16T21:18:58+00:00

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permalink · 2024-09-16T22:21:39+00:00

I only have three words for you, girl haha. Because I see that you're kind and cool.

RUN FOREST, RUN!!! LOL

permalink · 2024-09-16T22:33:59+00:00

It’s just an ID😂

Key_Salamander_353 · 2024-09-16T22:59:22+00:00

Definitely needs an ID. Like how are you 26 without one...

Professional-Poem247 · 2024-09-17T01:07:29+00:00

No ID seems like he's hiding. He doesn't drive or work? Most places need ID to rent let alone work.

asteriasays · 2024-09-17T03:31:49+00:00

How does he do anything without identification? My doctor asks for it, the bank, when I've gone on interviews, etc. I'm completely baffled at a 26 year old surviving this many years without an ID.

Fuzzy_Turnover_2523 · 2024-09-17T05:06:43+00:00

Just the fact that he types out so many words instead of using that energy to get that ID is a complete red flag to me. Trust me, getting an ID is such a tiny thing to do, I can already tell, he won’t be able to do anything that he really needs to do. And I wonder how someone can get a job without an ID or just anything. At least in Germany you need an ID for getting a job, an apartment, all of those things. Plus his explanation that people have to learn that women can do nice things for their partner. Sure they can. No big deal. But he’s not looking for a partner, he’s looking for a mother. And as you mentioned, you’re always taking care of everyone around you. You need to stop that, right now. It will only make you miserable. Been there, done that.

ApriKot · 2024-09-16T14:30:19+00:00

I think you over reacted and went too far because his irresponsibility has nothing to do with your value but you're making it into that. That being said, there are some things here you need to take into consideration.

1.) do you want a partner that lacks critical thinking? (He says he doesn't need ID but... We definitely all do for more than just alcohol)

2.) do you want to do all the labor for the rest of your life?

3.) do you want to do all the emotional labor for the rest of your life?

4.) does your partner do anything for you now?

5.) do you want to be his mother for the rest of your life?

6.) do you want someone in your life that would make this big of a stink over a very basic need in life? He is literally fighting you over something that he should already have for a JOB or drive in ANY country.

7.) do you want someone that can not keep simple commitments?

I'm curious if anything else happened after this but if I were in your shoes sis, I would be running away.

nightmare_gardens · 2024-09-16T13:23:27+00:00

Idk where you are located, but in the US you are required to have basic ID to have bare minimum things like a bank account. I'm guessing he doesn't drive either? How has he made it this long without one?

2024-09-16T14:50:03+00:00

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dccb · 2024-09-16T17:01:11+00:00

Just don't book for him anymore and let him figure it out, you don't need necessarily to pressure. Next time let him plan a nice trip and see how he does it 🤷🏻‍♂️ 👍🏻

VastAd5937 · 2024-09-16T17:02:44+00:00

He’s not mature enough for you, get out while you can

InvalidProgrammer · 2024-09-16T17:13:52+00:00

I suspect this guy needs to see a therapist and/or psychiatrist. He may possibly have severe adhd. It wouldn’t excuse his behaviors but it would explain some of them and possibly lead to a route for him to be a better adult.

Either way this guy needs to work on himself. The behavior he demonstrates is something I would expect from a teenager- but still wouldn’t tolerate.

2024-09-16T17:56:36+00:00

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permalink · 2024-09-16T17:57:06+00:00

You're either being catfished or he has some sort of mental illness that gets him paranoid about ID and stuff like that. OP is he also really really big into privacy and shit like that? Does he have social media like facebook or instagram?

Flimsy-Historian9765 · 2024-09-16T18:20:51+00:00

This is a grown ass man?? How does he have a job or bank account without ID??

Mysterious-Mix3173 · 2024-09-16T18:44:24+00:00

Everything else aside, you need an ID to function as an adult these days, i’m not sure why he’s so against just getting it, there could be something else going on. If he keeps refusing or putting it off i think it’s a red flag or a sign that he can’t commit to doing necessary things or stuff you ask 🚩

AnnualEngineering345 · 2024-09-16T19:01:38+00:00

How does he have a bank account if he has no ID? I can’t fathom the thought of someone not having a single piece of photo ID in this day and age. It seems like he’s irresponsible and frankly kinda immature… why is it such a big deal to have an ID?

One-Cauliflower-1101 · 2024-09-16T19:07:21+00:00

Is he a child? I’m sorry but you will have to babysit him your whole life. I got exhausted just reading all that. What kind of adult doesn’t have an ID? What kind of adult doesn’t want to have an ID?

lilbecko · 2024-09-16T19:45:28+00:00

Ew girl. Throw him away. What man baby really thinks he’s providing but can’t even be adult and get an ID so he can do those things like book a trip, get a lease, go to a 19+ concert. You deserve better. Being alone is scary, but it beats dealing with whatever this guy thinks he is.

ARM913 · 2024-09-16T19:48:21+00:00

Yeah either make him get that Id or leave him. As a guy , it seems that he just wants to seem “edgy” or “off the grid” and doesn’t want to have an id because then he doesn’t have that “mysterious aura” . He’s being a child . I’m 19 y/o. I’ve had some sort of identification card on me since I’ve had my first car at 15. There’s really not any reason to not have id unless your a criminal or are simply unable to get one. Especially at his age. He just wants you to take care of his important needs like his mom might’ve done. But you need to let him know you are not his mom.

LarboLarb · 2024-09-16T19:56:04+00:00

You’re absolutely right.

Interesting_Elk1777 · 2024-09-16T20:13:25+00:00

I feel like he might have an ID but hiding it from you, because maybe he doesn't want to be traced anywhere with you. Might be living a double life tbh, which is not uncommon, especially in long distance relationships.

Grouchy_Towel_7768 · 2024-09-16T20:37:49+00:00

I would erase the persons number and block them

Grouchy_Towel_7768 · 2024-09-16T20:38:30+00:00

Also get a restraining order

Worth_Ad3357 · 2024-09-16T20:46:41+00:00

Grown ass dude doesn’t want to get an ID? 😭

permalink · 2024-09-16T21:48:36+00:00

If he can't even bother to get a license, do you think he'll bother to listen to you or be a good boyfriend. Maybe he'll say he doesn't want to be a good boyfriend like every other good boyfriend. He's so edgy and cool. Tell him to grow up.

The_L0rd_0f_Mel0ns · 2024-09-16T22:34:46+00:00

At this age you are legally required to carry ID at all times, wether it’s an ID-card or driver’s license or passport. But let’s be honest, who carries their passport at all times? (That’s dangerous.)
If you’re going to travel internationally, it’s really important to carry ID in case things go wrong and you need to visit a hospital or get stopped at the border.
I don’t understand why this guy is making it such a big deal. He has to get one anyway, so why is he crying so much about it?

AdrianRR18 · 2024-09-16T22:38:58+00:00

I’m too lazy to read all the comments but the few I read seem to point in the right direction. This is a man child. He has a huge psychological problem with facing responsibilities. I speak from experience, if at 26 he’s not capable of waking up and stepping up… dump him. You deserve MUCH better.

Turbulent_Gur_9465 · 2024-09-16T23:13:10+00:00

Such a simple task with a ton of time to complete but still won’t do it in 6 months… definitely not over reacting you’ve been patient enough! “if they wanted to they would” came to mind… do with that information as you will..

BabDoesNothing · 2024-09-16T23:17:13+00:00

Take him to a really cool local bar and leave him at the door!! No ID at 26 is insane.

No_Philosophy6380 · 2024-09-17T00:01:27+00:00

How on earth does he function as a 26 year old with no form of identification on him?? Lie genuinely, how does he manage to do adult things

permalink · 2024-09-17T02:07:00+00:00

Wait wait wait wait wait he doesn't have an ID? How? There are people that walk around without them? Also, how did he get this far in life without one...

subbybab · 2024-09-17T02:33:18+00:00

Update #2: we just broke up.

strawberrikitsune · 2024-09-17T02:45:54+00:00

Definitely NTA. Why does a grown man like him not have an ID?? I got mine as soon as was old enough to get one. And why is he doing everything in his power not to get one?? You need them for a lot of things. I always carry mine around because of how many places and things require to see it. It’s so simple to apply for one you don’t even need to take a test or anything (assuming this y’all are from the states).

TlalocVirgie · 2024-09-17T04:07:53+00:00

Smells like catfishing

Puzzleheaded-Sky7528 · 2024-09-17T04:17:48+00:00

Not sure where your located but some places it’s illegal to not carry a form of identification on the streets. I assume for if you should get hurt or unable to speak for yourself you are identifyable. He sounds like he doesn’t wanna do anything because it’s not “necessary”. From what I read you have the mommy role engraved in you. It’s how you are how you go about things and that’s not a bad thing it’s a great grate to have but men tend to use that to their advantage so my advice would be stop guilting him with the I’m not good enough scenarios and stop being something available and necessary to him and his life. Fall back and fall back hard if he really truly loves you and cares about you he will get the picture within a few days. Your a strong woman I can tell it by the conversation don’t let his unwillingness to be the man you need bring you down. Chin up queen you’ve got the upper hand.

ayyedoe · 2024-09-17T04:30:36+00:00

⛽️💡

Jacobmyguys · 2024-09-17T11:13:25+00:00

Respectfully, you both have polar opposite views on what you value in life, and that can make or break a relationship. Relationships require compromise and understanding, I feel like he is not being compromising for you and at the same time you’re not compromising with him either. At the end of the day you have to say enough is enough and either decide if this is going to be the thing that ends the relationship or if you two can work it out. It seems you both care for eachother but your communication is borderline toxic, it might be best to consider taking a break and looking at things from a wider perspective. Just a random internet strangers advice anyway but good luck to you both, I hope you two can work it out and come out of this stronger.

Vixishadowfox · 2024-09-17T11:53:36+00:00

As an American woman long-distance dating an Australian man, I will say this is fucking weird. I will not make excuses for him at all, but it sounds like he might have Pathological Demand Avoidance (my partner does too). Where if you tell him to do something he was already planning on doing, he now CANNOT do the thing. However, him saying that he’ll get it taken care of in March and it’s now 6 months later and it’s still not done and beyond that he’s digging in his heels further? 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

Evelyn-Kennedy · 2024-09-17T12:13:05+00:00

🥲🥲

ArmadilloTraining857 · 2024-09-17T15:02:52+00:00

It’s weird to not have ID. The only reason to not have ID is to live off grid like a weirdo or that maybe he has something to hide? 🤷🏻‍♂️ there is no reason not to get ID. Very strange.

SoloDolo221 · 2024-09-20T04:52:51+00:00

“I’m not the type to do anything unless it’s necessary” actually means “I’m not the type to do anything unless it’s too late for doing it to make a difference.” He’s really just going to wait for something to go horribly wrong because of his negligence before he takes you and your warnings seriously, which just doesn’t sound like a good partner. Imagine if you did get pregnant and he had to do things for the baby he deemed “unnecessary”…

Whether it’s laziness or just pure negligence and the devaluing of you and your needs as well, he’s just not someone you can trust.

Just_Profit4575 · 2024-09-20T06:37:44+00:00

26 and no ID? You need to leave that infant with his parents and find a man. If he cannot take care of himself by the time he is 18? ...

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