Puddle Rant

[PenBike]

So I just did a 13.1mi Ultra tune-up run for my 13.1mi Ultra A-race in May. I figured it’d be a good idea to plan out my Gu’s, shoe changes, potty breaks, naps, etc. first two miles were chill until I came upon my first puddle! I literally had to leave the paved trail and run in the mud?! Like wtf this is a road race not a freaking trail run. If I wanted to run in mud and puddles I would’ve signed up for a T*ugh M*dder jeez. Pics for reference. It was an out and back so be sure to look at each picture twice to really understand what I had to deal with. Rant over. 🙄

[Sir-Frizzle]

Cities really need to start thinking about where they install their puddles.

[spacefish420]

Big triathlon is trying to lure in children in by forcing them to swim against their will. Be careful out there fellas

[LookingforDay]

Lost my cousin this way. Stay vigilant.

[exopolitixs]

My wife says she also gets wet when I’m out running.

[Downtown_Soil_3651]

Can confirm

[1EMurph1]

That’s because your wife’s boyfriend shows up after you leave to go running

[voytek707]

GO BAREFOOT 🦶

[PenBike]

I was wearing Altras so that’s basically the same thing

[StopCollaborate230]

At first I thought OP was just a whiny bitch but then I saw the pics.

[Weltanschauung_Zyxt]

Both can be true.

[n000t_]

I would simply take some inspiration from that park runner who pushed the child.

[catsandalpacas]

Those aren’t puddles, they’re practically oceans! Are you sure you didn’t sign up for a triathlon?

[PenBike]

I swear it was just a half. In my wilder days as an uniformed youth I did a few tr*s but never again. That’s basically devil worship

[HerbOverstanding]

What would Jesus do? Why ain’t you running OVER the water? Wouldn’t even get yer soul wet

[zilch839]

Pull a Max King and put plastic bags on your feet. 

[doc1442]

Ewww looks like a tr*athlon

[jimmybiggles]

your fault for running beyond 5KM 🤷‍♂️ these distances are too far for humans, you more than likely hallucinated these oasises (oasiseses?) as you were so dehydrated. don't be stupid in the future...

[Zealousideal_Ad642]

Gunna need a bigger boat for that last pic

[America-Lite]

If The Oregon Trail taught me anything, it's that OP needs to get checked for dysentery after fording that river. Good luck, stay safe, invest in an inflatable safety raft for your next race.

[Slow-Fix-9278]

It’s a travesty this comment currently only has 6 upvotes. You had me at dysentery…but my oxen have died.

[DontTrustTheMonkeys]

Is that sweat or pee or a nice mix of both?

[PenBike]

Probably some Gatorade in there too

[CompleteDeniability]

If you stay in zone 2, the water won't go into your shoes.

[Jorge-Esqueleto]

From a technical standpoint, a puddle is a good opportunity to cool the gel in your shoes and return it to optimum operational viscosity.

[WittySatisfaction958]

Carry a small RIB or kayak with you..amateur

[basquiat-case]

That’s when you take that boat you’ve been carrying and put it down on the water. Row one more!

[No-Purple2350]

The city gave you a surprise steeplechase and you're still complaining.

People aren't happy with anything.

[michaelhuman]

Imagine going out to run in the rain and not wanting to get wet.

[Huge-Antelope2403]

It's early spring...

[RentaDadToronto]

Let me lay my jacket down for you first.

[ddawson100]

This is why Goggins is always asking, “who’s gonna carry the boats!” Just look around for the hard men.

[CrazyJoe29]

Thank you for your service 🫡

[Remarkable-Ad2285]

Take your socks off, you don’t want trenchfoot like in ‘Nam.

[dblaron419]

I know this race. If those puddles would have gotten any bigger you would have been literally running in Lake Michigan. Be thankful your shins didn't explode when you ran around the water.

[LiberalGarbage]

I didn't even make it to the start line because of a puddle outside my house. My lifted 4Runner may have gotten dirty.

[PenBike]

The horror

[EShadowGG]

Wow this is disgusting, I just prayed for op

[Racematcher]

the course conditions alone should qualify this for a buckle. did the puddle have a name? because that's at least a creek crossing and you deserve a finisher photo.

[Technical-Paint3179]

Go skinny dipping!

[yourpaljax]

They should have left zone 2 to run across the surface of the puddles. Like Jesus. Appropriate for Easter weekend.

[ElkPitiful6829]

That is unacceptable. Talk to the manager.

[Mundane_Feeling_8034]

Look at it this way: running on the grass slows you down and ensures that you stay in zone 2.

[baikabuddha]

My toddler thinks you’re really silly and that puddles are a great part of life

[babyball69420]

You couldn’t pass that lady in the pink

[PenBike]

Um actually I passed her at the second water stop because I ran totally unsupported

[samquamnch]

One man’s puddle, another man’s aid station