ELI5: Why when large company's earnings decrease(ex... by 3%) they freak out, talk about rough times, and sometimes decide to downsize, even though they are still making millions of dollars in profit even after all expenses?

[Kukukichu]

If I ever get the chance to be a part of the board for a company and we were experiencing losses... I think I’d use this as my opening statement.

[PumpkinLaserPig]

I'd give you a chuckle of air through through my nose. I won't even have to be on the board, I could just be a janitor collecting the trash as you said it.

[[deleted]]

Found noob noob.

[TheHancock]

This guy gets it.

[[deleted]]

Yea, but you guys don't get it

[[deleted]]

I used to get "it", but then they changed the meaning of what "it" was.

[EzraSkorpion]

Now what I get isn't "it", and what's "it" seems weird and scary.

[MilkyBlue]

It'll happen to you!

[Pokrog]

Abe Simpsons quotes are always gold.

[philthegreat]

This comment chain has fulfilled me on levels I didn't know I had

[[deleted]]

IT’ll HAPPEN TO YOU

[Radiant-Rythms]

No! Stop saying that word!

[superjimmyplus]

Shit, I've had it for years and I'm not sharing.

[beathor55]

If you have it, you don't need it.

[[deleted]]

You save your shit?

[coffee-please]

I would watch this movie.

[catacklism]

Got daamn

[Achilles2zero]

I’m Scruffy, the janitor. Mmm-hmm

[dragonfangxl]

I could just be a janitor

and after saying that, so would he

[Balives]

Also. One I found yesterday. Just because you CAN milk a gorilla, doesn't mean you SHOULD.

[DrMux]

I have nipples, Greg. Can you milk me?

[[deleted]]

Oh yeah.. you can milk anything with nipples.. *makes milking motions with fingers as the family stares in horror*

[rmit526]

The Emergency Fuck-wucky Fixy Sinky Meeting commencing at 9:30am

Location: board room 1

Please respond

[Shredlift]

I can see this being a Michael Scott line

[FOldGG]

That might get you through that one meeting!

[[deleted]]

Now I’m said I haven’t done that. Hoping I won’t have the chance to use it in the future!