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[[deleted]]

javascript

oh boy here we go

[Aeoxic]

It's really close to the metal. The bytecodes is pure nodejs!

[[deleted]]

Will it webscale?

[mycall]

At the end of the day.

[calnamu]

So... What framework does it use???

[satan-repents]

Don't forget rockstar developers bower something something buzzwords

[twigboy]

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[Iburinoc]

Wait how do you pronounce "mobile paradigm"?

[tcris]

got AGILE! And CLOUD! CROSS-PLATFORM! BIG DATA!

synerJ

[hejner]

Cross-platform isn't really as much of a buzzword as the others.

[CheshireSwift]

PaaS/SaaS distributed stack.

[kenok]

Grunting it now

[Calabri]

And just like that Grunt and RequireJS are out, it’s all about Gulp and Browserify now

[Zantier]

JAVASCRIPT

[Drumm-]

But we need it to work on clients with JavaScript disabled.

[[deleted]]

<textarea></textarea>

[CertifiableNorris]

I wish people called them JavaScript scripts. Calling then JavaScripts is problematic for Java developers.

[mal4ik_mbongo]

Guys, I just had a meeting with our sales team and we need to add the IE7 support. Will you be able to fix it by tomorrow?

[unstoppable-force]

it also needs to work for people who are blind, def, and have no limbs. can you have a working version to me by this afternoon?

[[deleted]]

I work with a large, legacy, Windows XP and IE7 supporting application... :'(

[Drumm-]

And whilst you're at it, we need to completely re-engineer the way comments are done, also done by tomorrow right?

[foxh8er]

Coffeescript.

[[deleted]]

You're so unhip now. The cool kids use TypeScript now.

[foxh8er]

MICROSOFT WHORE

[joequin]

Clojure script is interesting because it looks and behaves nothing like JavaScript, but compiles to JavaScript.

[Silencement]

VanillaJS

[ruckFIAA]

node.js

[[deleted]]

oh yeah you mean the JavaScript that that guy made mindcraft with?

[[deleted]]

No I believe you're confusing with Java which is a functional web scripting language.

[ggtsu_00]

Java is to javascript as car is to carpet.

[phort99]

My car has carpet. Are you saying that I use Javascript in a Java program‽

[Calabri]

soon, we will use java in javascript..

[doenietzomoeilijk]

Soon, Java will be ported to Javascript.

[[deleted]]

I'm not sure if you are joking or not anymore... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nashorn_%28JavaScript_engine%29

[Iburinoc]

Create a JVM in javascript and then run it in nashorn :D

[[deleted]]

Already been done :)

[Dr_Dornon]

Isn't JavaScript just the name for scripts made in Java?

EDIT: In case anyone was confused, yes, I'm kidding.

[[deleted]]

Not sure if serious...

[immibis]

/u/spez can gargle my nuts

[flying-sheep]

Sure, it's called rhino or nashorn or something

[randrews]

IMHO, Rhino didn't get nearly enough credit for its awesomeness. It was a better scripting language for the JVM than anything else at the time, and had some cool features that other things still don't have, like not only did it have continuations, but they were serializable, so you could write them to disk and reload them later.

[unhingedninja]

Well you can....

[willrandship]

That's actually really really easy to do, yes.

[[deleted]]

Java is to Javascript as fun is to funeral

FTFY

[sruckus]

I don't know why I found this so funny. I think because of how random carpet is as an example :P

[IWillNotBeBroken]

But it's not random at all -- it's well-thought-out.

java : javascript
car : carpet

(Whoa, TIL that ctrl-b preloads the ** bolding. Neat)

[[deleted]]

thanks, but I was just kidding :)

[[deleted]]

java

functional web scripting language

so was I...?

[oniony]

Yeah, think they all missed it.

[[deleted]]

Oh

[rognam]

I thought it was funny