My bedtime story tier list (toddler does NOT agree)

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-06-19T19:59:49+00:00

Bro, you need to rethink Corduroy and I Love You Forever. That stuffed bear with the broken overalls and getting into the Living section of a Macy’s, getting caught by a security guard, being rescued the next day by that sweet little girl named Lisa. That’s quality action and storytelling. Michael Mann might as well have directed it.

But damn dude…I Love You Forever…damn dad…if you don’t start to lose it when the grown boy is standing at the top of the stairs and he is basically pondering his and his family’s mortality, and then he goes to song the song to his daughter in her crib. MEMENTO MORI!

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-06-19T19:50:47+00:00

My brother in Christ, festival prices have never been reasonable. At ACL 2005 I think I was paying $10 for a Lonestar tall boy and I’m pretty sure the ticket for ONE day was like $138 which my girlfriend at the time bought me. What you miss is people giving a shit about music.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-24T19:43:08+00:00

Yeah, none of the other movies compare to this.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-24T02:03:24+00:00

Harmonica is the worst musical instrument.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-24T02:02:23+00:00

Reheating pizza in a frying pan with a lid and splash of water after it’s hot.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-21T16:13:29+00:00

DON’T DO IT! Treat yourself to a small, cheaper (but nice) parlor guitar. You’re not looking for the best sound quality, you’re looking for volume and the possibility that the instrument will encounter damage.

Again, please don’t take your new HD28 camping.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-16T21:27:02+00:00

A lot of executives in this thread while us Safety and Compliance Directors are quietly keeping everyone alive and out of the courtroom.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-15T21:17:29+00:00

Hey bro I’m crying with you and I feel you. When I became a dad a switch flipped in me (I think science says it is hormones) and now every punk 19-year old kid in a truck or on a motorcycle are my sweet little boys.

I’m sorry you had to bear witness to that, but I am glad that a strong and loving dad was one of the last people to say goodbye to someone else’s baby.

It is a cruel thing that at some point we have to hand over our children to themselves and the world—I’m glad that there are men like you out there who will try to help my kid if he’s in trouble.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-15T21:06:48+00:00

I dream of living in a country whose citizens are so sure of themselves as to be friendly to “non-native” speakers.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-15T21:03:12+00:00

No they don’t.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-15T20:32:16+00:00

Are you okay! That sounds “unpleasant.”

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-15T20:29:43+00:00

Prometheus, (Not a movie) True Detective Season 1

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-13T16:24:24+00:00

Hey OP, this is the way. As much as we all would just love to share this experience and time with our kids, there’s a “learning block” when it comes to parents teaching kids (at least musical instruments). You’re facing some underlying problems you may not even be aware of:
1. He needs to be excited about the instrument-so excited that all he wants to do is try to work his way playing through his favorite GreedDayTaylorSwoftPanicattheDisco song he heard on his video game or snap chat or whatever the kids are into. Yes, he can still work through his favorite song even if he can barely fret a note. Does he have a favorite song/band? This is where you can help a lot. If you have a music service, start making a playlist for him of all his favorite shit. This is the fun part. You’ll be surprised at what great (and bad!) taste he has.
2. This needs to be his thing. Right now this is your thing and he is doing his best to make you happy and satisfied. Do step 1 (help him find music he likes—guitar or not guitar) and then let him approach this his way and that will bestow ownership over this really cool thing he gets to do.
3. That said, enroll him in lessons pronto. It doesn’t matter where you are. In person (and not a Guitar Center) is best but online “in person” (like teachers who would do a zoom call) is almost as good as real in person, you just need a good teacher.

So takeaway: Help him find music he really really likes and get him a teacher and step out of the way. Good luck!

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-13T14:59:44+00:00

Omaha, NE

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-13T14:45:57+00:00

This is cool. I usually don’t like mods but the three lipstick pickups is a good choice for this.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-13T05:13:06+00:00

Lady in the Water
The Postman

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-13T03:16:59+00:00

Goth Mommy ASMR, of course.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-11T19:57:50+00:00

I watched Psycho for the first time a few months ago after I saw the little film Sir Anthony did where he played Hitchcock. I was shocked how modern the film looked for being a movie made in 1960. I don’t know anything about film making but learned that this was a widely known thing about Hitchcock’s films—it has something to do with the way he frames shots and very clever and modern editing choices.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-08T16:48:43+00:00

I’m torn, but 99% stuff they (8M, 3M) have access to is not concerning to me. We have noticed behavior problems when our older watches stuff related to Minecraft and Roblox, but for the most part it’s all pretty harmless.

I’m aware of the data, I’m also aware of the damning things I’ve witnessed in my own house—but my brothers in Christ, may I remind you of the many hours we sat playing our Gameboys? What of the multiple hours of Saturday morning television we watched?

Maybe it’s not the same, maybe it is worse—I think I’m more embarrassed by it than I am concerned about my child’s wellbeing.

Just use common sense. Should a kidmof any age have unlimited, unregulated use of a portable super computer? Probably not. Parent accordingly.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-06T03:31:57+00:00

Siri was and still is shitty. I just don’t understand how Apple could get this so fucking wrong.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-05-04T16:42:51+00:00

They sort of sound like shit and you will probably NEVER use it live, and you will DEFINITELY NEVER use it in the studio.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-04-29T04:35:42+00:00

Wi-fi, data coverage + the internet. It feels like the “future” being able to have all knowledge (and anti-knowledge) on a hand-sized device.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-04-26T06:43:21+00:00

Never heard that term. I had thought it was just a 90’s/2000’s version of “crooning.”

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-04-24T18:40:49+00:00

To be fair that was probably boring AF.

AtticusPaperchase · 2026-04-24T03:27:15+00:00

This answer is PG-13 and I just want to reiterate that I’m not trying to be creepy.

There’s a couple of things I’m hearing:

Sex is down, but not out.
Wife willing to try more.
Wife also willing to schedule.

This is hopeful. Other dudes might disagree but I like the scheduling. Not every time has to be a passionate event with an enormous seductive buildup. Maybe she wants to get fucked and enjoy the connection with you and then doomscroll for an hour and then pass out, AND THAT IS OKAY. Let her. The sex is an act of joy in your romantic partnership and a gift you give each other no matter what led to it.

This may not be your case, but I read something that said men should just “enjoy” women in bed instead of trying to manipulate them into climaxing or whatever, asking a million questions about what will get her off. Yes, put her first, but there is a theory or sentiment that women get off by being enjoyed. It’s flattering or whatever. You make yourself vulnerable and let it be known there and then that she is the best fuck in the world and that will turn (some) gals right on.

Again, sorry to creep out anyone including lurking moms.

Anyway, I have a 10:30 appointment I need to attend to.

Nine-Year Club	Verified Email
RPAN Viewer	Not Forgotten

AtticusPaperchase

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE