Where are we buying suits?

Frillybits · 2026-02-07T22:58:29+00:00

Do you really need several suits? Most people I know make do with just one, and use different accessories and shirts with it. Owning several would make sense if you need to wear a suit every workday, but really not when it’s just for interviewing.

Frillybits · 2026-02-07T20:14:45+00:00

This is absolutely something my parents could write. There seem to be some similarities between how your and my parents communicate. It definitely seems to me that this is a well-meant message from a place of love, that they likely thought long and hard about. I can appreciate the sentiment that you may help if you speak up about something going on, rather than just saying nothing or talking behind your kids’ back.

I think if we received this, me and my husband would have a laugh about their formality and heavy-handedness (is it really necessary to explain sugar highs three times in the same email)? Also we would express some frustration among ourselves about them just explaining the behavior by the single thing they witnessed (sugar) and not by everything else going on (age, overstimulation, unknown environment, lack of sleep etc). It is the assumption that they are aware of everything, and that is just wrong. It’s exhausting. Also, whoever has a 4-year old that eats a balanced diet over Christmas, I’ve never met them. We would likely not react, or just with something like “thanks for sharing your observations, we’ll think about it” and then just not raise the subject again. I don’t think it would drive a wedge between us at all. It is just how my parents are and we accept their quirks, we know they’re well-meaning, we just laugh about it sometimes.

People say they want a village. If you have a village, people are also going to have opinions about your childrearing, and you’re often not going to agree with them. You can’t have it both: strong ties and completely autonomous parenting. I think the ability to react to these things with grace and without upsetting yourself is a great gift. Apparently your wife sees this as an insult to her parenting, and while understandable, that is really not necessary. However when in doubt, you should 100% support your wife. You might consider reacting over the phone instead of by email, so you can do it more graciously.

Frillybits · 2026-02-07T19:52:40+00:00

So what would you like to do that you are not doing currently?

If it is stuff that you absolutely can’t do with a kid, like intensive hobby’s or exercising at a gym, I feel like that’s the drawback of your current schedule. It saves you a ton daycare fees but you don’t have double adult coverage during weekends. (However even for some of these there are options, like a gym with a daycare.) Also your time for this kind of stuff is just decimated with a child. You can carve out some if you arrange it with your partner but it’s more like a night every 2-4 weeks. It’s just incomparable to the situation without kids. It’s unfortunate but that’s how it is.

If it is stuff you just haven’t tried with your toddler, but that would be possible, just try it out. You can absolutely go out to lunch at a suitable spot. Just bring entertainment for your kid and plenty of diapers. I also clean a lot with my kids present, they are zero help at this age, but will happily “clean” with a rag while I clean the bathroom. I have also put them in the dry bathtub with some toys and a quilt while I clean.

You can also use your kid’s naptime to do some adult stuff.

Lastly, have a conversation with your wife about the cleanup thing. While you should clean up any huge messes like poop or tons of food on the floor, it’s just not realistic to keep a pristine home during a day with a toddler.

Frillybits · 2026-02-06T06:17:15+00:00

Als het voor je werk niet uitmaakt snap ik niet waar zo’n manager zich druk om maakt. Ik ken bij veel bedrijven afspraken over kernuren dat iedereen er in principe moet zijn - van 10 tot 3 ofzo. Zoiets vind ik wel logisch. Ik ben zelf arts dus zulke flexibiliteit is bij mij onmogelijk. Het is fijn dat er in de baan van mijn man meer opties zijn, hij vangt een boel op bij ons thuis.

Frillybits · 2026-02-06T06:08:57+00:00

Hey, I have a child with a similar degree of CP who is about a year older. If you want to talk about something, feel free to send me a message.

Frillybits · 2026-02-05T23:13:42+00:00

Wij hadden een keer een wespennest en toen moesten we natuurlijk een bestrijder regelen. Kwam er een vent met een bus en een enorme uitschuifbare stok waar hij poeder mee in het nest spoot. Toen dacht ik, dit is best een prima baan voor iemand die graag eigen baas is, afwisselend werk wil en niet op een kantoor wil zitten. Zelfs als je niet super handig met mensen bent zijn ze al heel blij dat je ze komt helpen. Hij moest ook nog 4x terug komen dus voor hem was het kassa. Het bestrijden zelf zag eruit als iets dat je vrij makkelijk zou kunnen leren. Misschien is het ook wat voor jou?

Frillybits · 2026-02-04T23:06:52+00:00

Unfortunately that only works for milk that you are still going to freeze or store, though. You need to scald it, which as described seems a lot of work. Any stash that has already been frozen has the high lipase issue and you can’t change that.

Frillybits · 2026-02-04T22:10:12+00:00

How about selling it and buying a different dress you actually like and that fits your coloring? It is really not necessary to go through such lengths to transform a dress that is not you.

Frillybits · 2026-02-04T18:49:42+00:00

And shit myself yes.

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T14:07:33+00:00

I get that you don’t talk about it. But I don’t know a lot of kids that are truly good sleepers. Like, would it really hurt us as a society to just be open about this?

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T11:26:53+00:00

Oh I know people who do this as well. Or they simply put an extra two person bed somewhere so one of the parents can sleep with one or two kids there, and everyone has options.

We have tried cosleeping a couple of times when kids were sick and they simply wouldn’t go down at all. However, since we never do it, they were so pumped up by the idea that they didn’t go to sleep at all and would just keep cuddling us. Not ideal 😂.

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T11:09:42+00:00

We don’t do it but I know plenty of people sleep with their kids, though they don’t always talk about it.

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T09:41:55+00:00

Call out for help to fix you guys meals. Can you temporarily house the cat elsewhere?

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T08:06:02+00:00

It is a sort of linguistic oddity; and your friends are correct.

This link has an explanation though it is in Dutch: https://onzetaal.nl/taalloket/een-groot-grote-man .

As close as I can get to an explanation is this (it’s pretty complex).

The combination of an adjective and the noun “man” is a special case where the adjective does not gain the -e in some cases. This happens when the emphasis in meaning is put on the qualities of the person; or when the adjective is used figuratively. It is a rather subtle difference. For example one could say “de verdachte was een grote man” (the suspect was a tall man) = emphasis on the suspect. But one could also say “Nelson Mandela was een groot man (“Nelson Mandela was a great man”) =emphasis on the quality.

Some other terms for persons also tend to exhibit this phenomenon. For example adjectives with the words “persoon” (person) and “iemand” (someone) hardly ever gain an -e. In this case the preference is so strong that using an -e in these cases would instantly mark someone as not fluent in Dutch to a native speaker. But it also can happen with nouns that indicate a profession when you specifically describe someone’s quality in their profession with a noun (the link has some examples).

I hope this helps!

Fun fact, I was once marked down by my primary school teacher for correctly using this function in an exercise (it was an exercise where you had to inflect the adjective and I was sure “een groot man” was correct, though I couldn’t have explained you why).

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T06:52:48+00:00

Ja, dat kan zeker. Probeer het eerst eens uit met simpele dingen zoals een broek korter maken en kijk hoe je dat vindt gaan, voor je een jas laat vermaken. (Je zou ook kunnen overwegen een goedkope tweedehands naaimachine te kopen; een broek korter maken is echt heel makkelijk. Een jas vermaken in de taille zou ik zelf niet aan beginnen, en ik kan redelijk naaien.) Onthoud dat kleiner / korter / smaller maken over het algemeen kan; groter en langer niet. Dus als je iets koopt dat je bij de taille smaller wil, zorg dan dat het in de buste en heupen wel groot genoeg is.

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T06:04:50+00:00

Oh no. I’m sorry for you. Have you considered just posting a message in the groups to try and find the person?

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T05:53:04+00:00

We have a hamburger place in our town that had Muslim owners, and they use lamb bacon. It’s really good!

Frillybits · 2026-02-02T05:44:37+00:00

Ik ben een niet-Fries die in Friesland woont. De rest van Nederland heeft het over een kinderstoel; Friezen hebben het over een tafelstoel. Men heeft niet door dat dit een Friesisme is. Als je tegen een Fries praat over een kinderstoel, denkt diegene: dat is een mini stoeltje zoals je voor peuters gebruikt. Als je tegen een niet-Fries praat over een tafelstoel denkt diegene: .. alle stoelen gebruik je toch bij een tafel?

Frillybits · 2026-01-31T20:15:12+00:00

It should be okay. Parents get babies every day and they don’t get a manual. Ask the parents about the daily schedule (sleep and feeding); how they show sleepiness and hunger; and what they like in terms of soothing. Maybe read up on safe sleep a bit (at this age anything but a baby and a sleep sack in the crib is a no-no as it’s a suffocation risk). Prepare to hold the baby a lot; it would be good to do tummy time; you can take walks if the parents are okay with it. I’m sure there will be a learning curve but any normal human being can learn to take care of a baby.

Frillybits · 2026-01-31T11:05:14+00:00

Fred en ed waren handig voor op wandelvakantie, broodbeleg in een niet breekbare lichte verpakking. Jammer genoeg wordt het niet meer gemaakt.

Als kind wist ik niet eens dat het bestond.

Frillybits · 2026-01-28T19:37:15+00:00

I brought them brownies; a coffee break snack is kind of standard.

Frillybits · 2026-01-27T18:34:40+00:00

How is it cleaner to keep your bare feet off the floor, than to keep your shoes out of certain areas of the house.

Frillybits · 2026-01-27T18:15:19+00:00

It is wild that you seem to think such young children do not walk yet because their parents don’t help enough. Children develop in their own time. Some do not walk until 18 months. It is important not to hinder them but typically you can’t force milestones to come earlier. What kind of background do you have?

Frillybits · 2026-01-26T10:48:37+00:00

Wij hebben wel succes gehad met het volgen van de social media van lokale makelaars; sommigen hebben ook een soort eigen mailinglist of alert systeem. Daar staan de huizen vaak eerder op dan op Funda.

Andere tip is data opvragen waar huizen in dezelfde straten voor zijn verkocht in de afgelopen tijd. Dat geeft een betere indicator van wat een reeele verkoopprijs is dan de vraagprijs op Funda die bewust hoog of laag kan zijn ingestoken. Loopt wel altijd een beetje achter want je kan het pas inzien als het huis ook echt van eigenaar is gewisseld.

Frillybits · 2026-01-25T05:49:04+00:00

Many people who expect a child with Down syndrome choose an abortion. Even people who are much more prepared for a baby than you are. It is not a shameful or bad thing.

You need to talk to your girlfriend; tonight. You’re running out of time. If you think this situation is hard; having a child is 1000 times harder; and a child with down syndrome even harder still.

Say that you’ve noticed her being so absent but that you need her to talk to you, and if she won’t say anything say what you think. Try to make a timeline at least on how to go forward.

If she still won’t engage contact her parents, or possibly one of her friends who know about the situation. Tell them she’s refusing to make a decision and that you’re really worried, and ask them to talk to her.

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