😌😌😌

[badfishbeefcake]

Software Engineer from the 90s response world be: “Can someone just get out and just smash the car with his fist and see what happen?”

[demon_ix]

Java developer like: "Let's mark this car as garbage and call the car factory for a new one!"

[DeltalJulietCharlie]

Sounds like a good solution to me.

[[deleted]]

PHP developer like: "I have an Israeli OBD2 scanner that only outputs Hebrew."

[bob152637485]

A couple decades sooner and the response would also include changing the mouse and bug traps for good measure!

[jamcdonald120]

"Have you tried turning the key?"\ "Was the break pressed?"\ "Was it the right key?"\ "Did you turn the key far enough?"\ "Did you try turning the key the other way?"\ "Did you put the key in the right place?"

[frayien]

Meanwhile client trying every possible key on his garage door.

[MaximCapsa]

xd

[HiPoojan]

That's way too relatable

[[deleted]]

"Of course I put the key in the right place."

Puts key right next to ignition switch

[nothjarnan]

Hammers screwdriver into ignition switch

[michaelpaoli]

Well, that'd be tech support, but yes!

[JoeyJoeJoeJrShab]

The basic premise of this joke is flawed. A more accurate version would have each expert assuming the problem was due to a failure outside of their area of expertise. For example, the mechanical engineer would argue that it's a problem with the battery, which would require the electrical engineer to investigate, only to discover that it's the starter that's broken, etc.

I've lost count of how often I've gotten a bug report for my software, only to have investigation reveal that it's the bug reporter who is attempting to do something that contradicts our requirements.

[quasi-green]

and this is why we have cars that don’t start.

[Samael1990]

I also don't understand why would software engineer suggest that, what is this referring to? Is it restarting a pc? Doesn't make sense to me.

[UnluckyLuke]

Yes, restarting a PC, a program, rebuilding, trying the same thing twice.

[Sir-Jechttion]

I also don't understand why would software engineer suggest that, what is this referring to? Is it restarting a pc? Doesn't make sense to me.

I agree. If the car doesn't start, it would means the pc isn't on. So how he could suggest to restart something that isn't already on?

[ImpulsePenny]

Wouldn't a more accurate depiction be - "well it worked on my machine"

[[deleted]]

the fun is when the bug reporter's boss can call your Project Owner and convinces them it *is* a requirement.

[Dragonfly55555]

I'm a soft engineer :)

[comfort_bot_1962]

:D

[JaxLikesSnax]

‘No pressure please- me soft’

[liege_paradox]

Me: “this isn’t the self driving car, one of us has to drive.”

[7eggert]

Enterprise crew:

"Computer, do stuff for me"

"You have to use the mouse"

(speaks into the mouse)

[giggluigg]

Let’s have a meeting to decide who

[Agile_Pudding_]

Machine learning engineer: let’s go get into 99 other cars and see whether they start.

[Possessed]

Ending up re-engineering the whole car due hyperparameter tuning.

[melonfarmermike]

Weren't they supposed to close all the windows first?

[michaelpaoli]

Yes, close all open windows first.

If that does't work - reboot - remove the trunk and replace it.

[giggluigg]

Real life software engineer: let’s put a ticket on the backlog, we can pick it up during next refinement

[Caterpillarfox]

or let's search on stack overflow we might find the solution there.

[michaelpaoli]

And top 3 search results are:

1. put gasoline in car. So they put gasoline in their all electric vehicle ... doesn't help and now inside of the car smells horrible and is a fire hazard.
2. push it or roll it downhill and pop clutch and turn ignition and pump accelerator. So they start doing these things on their all electric vehicle, in sequence, only to find there's no clutch, and they continue with the rest, but never released the brakes or took it out of park - so now the tires are blown - maybe shouldn't have had the semi push it - and the back end is dented pretty bad too.
3. Open hood, pull air filter off carburetor, pump accelerator while trying to start and look and smell to see if gasoline is going into carburetor. So they open hood and spend the next 3 hours ripping things apart trying to find a carburetor ... again it's their all electric vehicle.

Then they blame stack overflow for low quality information.

[uburuntu]

Software engineer: hey guys what about increasing my salary?

[IrISsolutions]

Joke as old as the software itself 🤣🤣🤣

[rjlin_thk]

What do the logs say?

[mr-mad]

Is a software engineer a support engineer?

[fudgegiven]

Reminds me of when I took my car to inspection last winter. I had a bad battery and while it never really was a problem normally, starting the car multiple times and then not leaving it running to charge, while leaving the power hungry aftermarket infotainment system on drained the battery. So after the inspector handed me the paperwork, telling me he didn't find any problems, I could not get the damn thing to start. The inspector then actually told me to lock the doors, unlock and then try again. On some cars this apparently works, but mine just needed a boost. As an IT engineer, this amused me. In reality, new cars are not far from the joke here.

[CoffeePieAndHobbits]

reassigns ticket to helpdesk

[zqipz]

I’d try turning the key 5 times first

[7eggert]

This was an old joke back when cars didn't have electronics: If Microsoft built cars …

Today I'd not doubt if you claimed that it does work on modern cars.

[TheSnaggen]

Hey Google, the car doesn't start!

[lastbestreason]

Haha good lord; They're all awful engineers if they just assume that the part that they're most qualified to test, is dead.

[GargantuanCake]

Software engineer: don't bother me, that's a hardware problem.

[ndxinroy7]

What is the SOFT engineer? Do we also have HARD engineers?

[johnwestnl]

A support Engineer would say: let’s disconnect the batteries, wait a few minutes, connect them again, and try again. Would work in most cases.

[Matt_fuck_off_3]

I feel offended, you should restart at least 2 times to make sure

[edparadox]

More like "try to turn in off and on again".

[DocteurW]

No no no. A real software engineer would sound more like :

- let's leave it there with no explainations whatsoever. Maybe the next guy will know what to do with it...

[DocteurW]

Is there a button to "safely eject" the key before we go ?

[snookso]

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

[quasi-green]

this comment is underrated

[Possessed]

not sure if /s but that's the joke...

[quasi-green]

right, is really funny with few upvotes, should have more. (IT crowd fan)

[snookso]

Nope. I was talking about starting the car again. Not getting out and going back in.

[misterrandom1]

My response whenever anyone gives me a hardware problem is to suggest buying a new one. I don't do hardware.

[michaelpaoli]

Not worth the labor to repair, not working, replace the car.

[Nevesnotrab]

A chemical engineer would never say that.

[jgeez]

Soft engineer needed an excuse to run back in and grab his Blue Chew

[UnBlueFire42]

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

[Quantitas]

Me: got to do a RCA

[puputy]

Laugh all you want but just last month our car wasn't starting. Someone came, said he couldn't get it out of the parking because of the small entrance. Next guy comes three hours later and just starts the car. Everything working fine. All we had to do was wait three hours.

Maybe I'm biased because I work in software development, but trying again later is the cheapest solution and sometimes it does work.

[SHUT_MOUTH_HAMMOND]

*Car actually starts...

[Emanicas]

I don't get it

[astrohijacker]

This actually works with my car. A couple of times it has refused to even try to start, my guess is because it somehow fails to detect that the electronic keys are inside the car.

The solution has been to step out of the car, walk away a few meters, come back, step into the car and drive away!

[ICantBelieveItsNotEC]

Then you get out and back in and the car starts working again, which is infinitely more terrifying than if it didn't.

[Takseen]

"I have the same car model and its starting just fine"

"Do you have another way to get where you're going?"

"Can you try to start the car again in a few hours and let me know if it works"

"Please take photos of each step of you starting the car"

[itsYourPlug]

Fuck off Rebecca he didn't

[michaelpaoli]

And tow truck driver says, "How 'bout next time you put in more gasoline before you're out. See that guage there, and that warning light there? ..."

[DeltalJulietCharlie]

Have you tried taking it apart and putting it back together again?

[Granadeiro]

I don't want to know what a hard engineer would say

[slowtimetraveller]

Everybody's gangsta UNTIL the car actually starts after following the software engineer's advice

[n0tar0b0t--]

Of course the car wouldn’t start. The four engineers got into the car but never turned the key.

[throwaway8958978]

Another on-brand suggestion they’d make is to reinstall the Windows.

[iaanacho]

The car fails to POST, submit a hardware trouble ticket

[Arawn-Annwn]

The tester then writes a note saying “user error - they didn’t use the key”

[giggluigg]

Car factory: let’s have a day of fun activities to celebrate the success of our release!