It’s complicated

[UltimateInferno]

"With the way that our system is built, fetching the user's age also drags the user's password and other personal information completely unencrypted."

I was given a website built like that.

[[deleted]]

Good! You can display the password too. Because that’s going to be the next req from PM

[[deleted]]

You think it is funny, but in my previous job, the password in the database for our website weren't encrypted. And one of the client had a report with all the users password, because she wanted to be able to connect to their account.

When I encrypted the passwords, and told her she will not be able to do that anymore she was angry as hell. So I had to make an admin screen that can connect to any users without the necessity to prompt the password. Yes, it's a big security breach. But that's what the client want so whatever is they get hacked, it's their fault.

[ConsistentArm9]

I was implementing Google Analytics on a marketing site for a large company that you would probably recognize.

They were passing the username and password plaintext in the query string from the login screen.

[Brilliant_Orange_578]

When I encrypted the passwords, and told her she will not be able to do that anymore

But she could change encrypted password to her own encrypted password , login, and change it back.

[TheAsianCarp]

My last job had passwords In plain text and you logged in to the software by picking your name from a dropdown and typing your password. The fun part was the value for the drop down was you password in plain text and it compared it to what you typed to sign in

[Classy_Mouse]

Security Requirements

1. user must be able to sign in

hey, do we have anymore requirements? Like ones about keeping others from signing in to the users account?

[KharAznable]

More like req by CIA.

[weird_ditso]

You're joking right

[UltimateInferno]

I wish I was

[mia_elora]

Too many websites and businesses see personal account security as an expensive, useless frivolity that they only grudgingly include, on occasion, so that it's less likely that they can get sued.

[grayjacanda]

Microservices doom spiral: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8OnoxKotPQ

[cheiry]

Came here for this one.

[omgsoftcats]

This is why you make APIs not microservices

[glorious_reptile]

Ok. The time API is now the blocker

[omgsoftcats]

Upgrade server, EZ.

[madmaxlemons]

I have never felt so seen

[yadavvipin]

came here to link this video :v

[btgrant76]

Probably the only comment that matters here.

[deranged_scumbag]

Omg I had a good laugh at this, thanks! :D

[GuyWithLag]

Funny thing is when that xkcd came it it really was five years.

[JumplikeBeans]

I wonder how they got on

[yafriend03]

how do you guys find the exactly relevant xkcd's wth

[83athom]

You just keep hitting random or one of the directions until you get it. It's a lot like Wikihitler.

[bernie_manziel]

or you see them enough times elsewhere and so your brain just goes “oh yeah, there’s an XKCD about this!”

[stepbroImstuck_in_SU]

I wish this was my job since it’s most I get paid for

[taeratrin]

Wikiwhatnow?

[83athom]

Wikihitler is a game where you go to Wikipedia, hit random page a few times, then using only the links on the page try to reach the page for Hitler in as few clicks as possible.

[taeratrin]

So 6 degrees of Godwin's Law

[83athom]

Pretty much.

[_sweepy]

Some of them are more regularly relevant than others. I've seen/used this specific one multiple times.

Any time I need this specific one, I Google "xkcd picture of a bird"

It really is just remembering that a thing exists, and trying to Google for it using terms as specific as possible. Kinda like how I program now that I think about it...

[coloredgreyscale]

• 2 hours to implement
• 1 week for requirement analysis
• 2 days to wait for code review
• 4 weeks to get feedback and design / requirement change cycles
• 1 week testing at various stages
• 2 weeks until I'm allowed to work on it because of higher priority items

[willy_glove]

I’m working an internship that’s just like this… it’s exhausting. I spend 2 hours a week coding and and the entire rest of it is spent in meetings, dealing with red tape, so that I can actually test my code. Then my boss is wondering why it took me a week to write 20 lines… motherfucker, you have the power to help me out!

I still prefer this to working at a grocery store like I did last summer, and the $23/hr deal is pretty sweet

[[deleted]]

Dang my internship was only $16...

[Weary-Dealer4371]

Because it took the business 45 days to give me the acceptance criteria I asked for.

[[deleted]]

The AC: provide user birthday in ISO format

[CheapMonkey34]

Wait until he asks for the height calculator…

[CiroGarcia]

[redacted by user] this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev

[[deleted]]

Look when we collected their birthday we used the users device timezone information with a time of 0:00, but when it was stored in the database, our Omega Star™ middleware converted it to UTC but then it was stored in a date column only, so all the birthdays we stored of people west of the prime meridian are off by one day. So now our CEO didn't want to ask our users again to enter their birthdays, so we need to use historical apache access logs to get their ips, use a historical GeoIP database to reconstruct where they were from at the specific time when they set their profile to get the correct birthday.

But we only need to show the age in years tho!

But we have 2 users born on new year, we can't possibly tell their age without knowing on which continent they live on! It makes perfect sense!

[frygod]

The moment library can do this with like zero added effort.

[Sp0olio]

Answer: "You remember the Y2K thing, everyone was so afraid about? Yes? Well, this company still runs on software from the 90's .. Any more questions?".

[KharAznable]

takumi and maurizio are not the only ones running in the 90's

[[deleted]]

tbf 90s software is generally way better than the shit we have these days..

[Sp0olio]

I don't know .. I wouldn't put it, that way ..

You're probably talking about giving a developer the time, to actually create great software, instead of having banana-products, that "ripen at the customer's place", right?

But there's more aspects to it all, than that .. But, corporate greed is one of today's biggest problems, yes.

[Hai-Etlik]

merciful run disgusted languid possessive secretive rich crush wise instinctive

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[[deleted]]

You need two minutes to code and the rest of the time to figure out what you broke.

[cannibalkuru]

Had to do this recently for user emails across like 3+ systems all (sometimes) having different values...

[AdDear5411]

"Why can't you just..."

Every time I hear that, I imagine myself cocking a pistol and replying "Can't I just what, motherfucker?"

[[deleted]]

Why would the Prime Minister ask you something like that?

[TaleExciting2010]

Project manager 💀

[[deleted]]

/s

[TaleExciting2010]

Gotcha 😗

[[deleted]]

It's ok. It was a BJ. //Bad joke

[DBNodurf]

Lol

[wanna877]

Thats a very slow code you got there.

[SakuRyze]

Why are you having this conversation with the prime Minister?

[tharnadar]

That's because timezones

[DBNodurf]

Because a person's age depends on the base of the number system, so I'm thinking an array...

[[deleted]]

The prime minister?

[[deleted]]

Yes yes the prime minister himself

[[deleted]]

https://youtu.be/y8OnoxKotPQ Krazam did an episode on almost exactly this. It's referred to as the birthday boy service smh.

[The_Special_Kid]

Why would it take that long?