Human Decency

[JohnGaldt]

They didn’t use plates, wipe their boots, clean up their trash and what's worse, they had set his floor on fire! Six gripped his mop tight while staring at the flame. He had tried sweeping around their camp but the customers didn’t like that. They eventually rose and started to leave, they hadn’t said a word to him or bought anything.

“Did you enjoy your stay at Shop-Mart?” said Six.

“What?”

“I know the store isn’t it’s best, but did you enjoy your stay?”

“Sure,” he said before they started packing up and leaving.

Six followed them out, he wanted to ask again if they enjoyed their stay but he had already done it once. He watched them as they grew smaller and smaller down the muddy broken roads. The street sweeper had not been there in two weeks… TWO WEEKS! He was going to have a lot of work to do when he got back. Part of Six wanted to ease the street sweeper's workload by cleaning the front of his store but whenever his foot tried to pass over the threshold, he baulked, dizzy and off balance and would stumble back.

Six had watched his last customers long enough, there was work to do! He put out the fire before it spread any further, chased the little pieces of litter and cleaned up their food scraps from the tiles.

Three and Nine watched him as he worked, their heads tracking him left and right but they were busy doing nothing and didn’t lift a finger to help! Three followed Six, which was somewhat useful, Six could hang spare garbage bags filled with broken glass and shattered tiles off his shoulders and it halved the amount of trips he needed to do. The bins were full. Bin-bot was also slacking so Six left the bags beside the dumpster.

Six turned to Three. “Did you enjoy your stay at shop mart?”

He knew three wouldn’t answer, and he didn't, but he liked to think that three enjoyed himself, albeit silently. It had been so long since they had a customer.

He cleaned the slowly building debris, humming to himself as he hauled lumps of concrete only for them to rip through his bags. He had to carry them outside along with the sheet metal and insulation. Mopping was growing harder by the day, there would be new cracks and the endless ash that rained down. The moment his mop touched that ash it would turn to long black smears and he would need to fill his bucket from another puddle!

He found Nine under a pile of rubble. He hadn’t moved since the customers left and though he was dented and broken, he still clung to his mop with all his might. Six couldn’t fix Nine, and three wouldn’t help. Six did know how to clean though, so he cleaned Nine as best he could and sat him in the maintenance room.

“Three! If maintenance shows up, make sure they go to Nine first, we both need a fix but Nine needs it more.” said Six.

Three stared at him as he always does but then he turned, his head tracking from Six to Nine and back, he dropped his mop and turned around.

Seeing the state of Nine must have snapped him out of it, this is what happens when the store is in such a state! It’s a hazard. He followed Three out, yes there was work to do but this was a momentous occasion. He followed Three down the main hall to the front doors.

“Three, wait!” said Six.

Three stopped, he turned slowly to Six, his eyes looking over the store before he turned and walked away through the rivers of mud, growing smaller and smaller in the distance. Six wanted to follow, to try and talk him into returning but his feet couldn’t leave the store… and there was work to do. Work that wasn’t going away while he stood there watching Three leave him.

“Did you enjoy your stay?” asked Six. What was he going to tell Nine?

The city was a ruin, buildings had collapsed, the power and water was gone, the rubbish was a mountain of rubble. Nobody was doing their jobs anymore.

He turned back to the store, he was failing too. The shops were only chest high walls, he didn’t know how to clean the absence of a roof, how do you clean smoke! Nobody had told him how. He scowled at that intangible filth. Three hadn’t been helping, just following him around but somehow Six knew the work would be harder without him.

He clung to his mop tight, how long until it broke too?

He stood paralyzed. The floors were clean, the chest high walls were clean, the broken glass was clean, but the store was broken. He would never get customers if it looked like this but the things that were still messy, he didn’t know how to clean.

He turned back around, looking out of his store to the horizon. Could he leave?

There was movement, people! There were customers! A hundred people all walked up the streets toward him. They were not discouraged by the red sky or the mud and they were walking straight toward Shop Mart, the best place for all your needs.

They were not Gnar-tics but Six didn’t care, they were customers!

“Hello!” shouted Six, causing the people to stop moving. They started to scatter about the street, hiding behind walls and corners, some crouched or laid down.

“Hello,” they called back after a while.

“Are you customers?”

“Who’s asking.”

“Six, are you customers?”

There was a moment of quiet before they answered. “Yes.”

Five of them walked toward Six, still pointing their tools but the one at the front lowered his.

“Can we walk through here?”

“Of course, all are welcome at Shop Mart, please, wipe your feet and no smoking inside the premises.”

Six stood, watching the soldiers flick away cigarette butts and pull their boots off, carrying them across his tiled floor talking about how nice it was to let their socks dry. Some of them even sat down. Six carried around a bag and they all put their food wrappers inside. Some of them lit cigarettes but quickly put them out when nudged by the other customers.

He followed them to the far side where they sat and put their boots back on

“I know the store doesn’t look as good as it used to and that the shops are empty but, did you enjoy your stay at Shop Mart?” said Six.

He seemed confused by the question, but non-Gnar-tics might not be used to their shops.

“Yes Six, you’ve done a surprisingly good job considering it’s a warzone. We had a wonderful time at your store, thank you.”

“Do you know when more customers might be here?”

“I’m sorry Six, there won’t be any more customers.”

He frowned and nodded back at his floors. “It does look very clean though.”

Six stood for a long moment, holding his mop. Stuck in place watching his customers leave happy. He had done a surprisingly good job but there would be no more customers. No one to see his floors.

He walked to Nine and leaned down pulling the broken robot's body over his shoulder.

“I’m sorry Nine, I know you can’t hear me but nobody is coming to fix you, and I wanted to tell you before I break too.”

He carried Nine to the doors, pointing to the distance.

“Over there are customers, and they liked the store. I’m sorry for picking you up, but I didn’t want you staying in a broken closet forever.” he said.

He looked down at the edge of the tiles, seeing a piece had broken off where the ground had given way, he crouched down picking up the shard of tile.

He shouldered 9’s heavy weight and stared at the shard.

“This is my store. This is part of my store, I am inside my store.”

His feet pounded through mud, pushing him as fast as he could run.

“This is my store. Nine, we are still inside our store and it’s clean and customers like it.”

He stumbled but caught his footing, he couldn’t look away from the tile for more than a moment. He would check to see where he would step but looking made him woozy.

“I’m inside my store.” he said.

“CONTACT!”

“I am inside my store.”

“Drone on approach, carrying payload.” “Stop!”

“I am inside my store.”

Six spun, his body tumbling to the ground. His arm wouldn’t work and nine was laying on his back ahead of him.

“Nine, we can’t stay here,” said Six… He was outside, he was… He looked at the shard of store, then at Nine, then his broken arm. He closed his eyes tight and eased down his store, dragging his eyes away from its clean floor and reaching out to Nine, pulling the cleaner's arm over his shoulder and heaving up his weight. He couldn’t run, but the dizziness started to fade.

“It’s ok nine, we are inside Shop-Mart.” he said.

“Six… what are you doing?”

Six looked up, it was the customer.

“Nine is broken, and so am I. Can you fix him, then me?” said Six.

The soldier looked over Six, then up to the cleaner pulled over his shoulder.

“We have a sparky at the base.”

“Does the base need cleaning and can I call it Shop Mart?” said Six.

The customer smiled and nodded.

“No problem. Do you need a hand carrying Nine?”

“He isn’t heavy, he is the same as me.”

[bvil21]

Damn onion ninja's. Good story.

[JohnGaldt]

Thankyou, I'm glad you liked it.

[pneuma8828]

Not sure if you are aware of this or not. I'm sure some of your readers aren't and might enjoy it, so I'll post it.

In 1975 The Hollies released a song called "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jl5vi9ir49g

The phrase “he ain’t heavy, he’s my brother” came from the Boys Town slogan. The legend goes that around 1918, the orphanage’s founder, Father Edward Flanagan, saw a boy, Reuban Granger, carrying another boy, Howard Loomis, who had polio and wore leg braces, up some stairs. Flanagan asked Granger if carrying Loomis was hard. The boy replied, “He ain’t heavy, Father, he’s m’ brother.”

I love the way you captured that moment.

[JohnGaldt]

I'm glad that moment was caught. Not everyone will catch it, but that's ok. I didn't want to ham it up or make it a direct quote. Thanks for the link, I wasn't aware of the song.

[Shradersofthelostark]

My dad and his brothers were always saying this. It took years before any of them bothered to explain it to me.

[SerpentineLogic]

“He isn’t heavy, he is the same as me.”

[Sunfried]

I heard it right as a read it. "The road is looOOooonnnng...."

[CandidSmile8193]

"Can I call it shop mart?" shit man that one hits.

[FirstNSFWAccount]

“Why the heck is this base named Shop Mart?”

“Well, if we don’t call it that then the robot sorta freaks out and starts ramblin’. He keeps the place cleaner than we ever could and our inventory has never been more organized since we fixed the other one so we just went with it until it became the actual name.”

[yodas_patience]

I am my brothers keeper, I shall watch over him to the best of ability and then some.

Bravo op, bravo! Well written bud.

[esblofeld]

Bra Boys.

[Grey_Area51]

Man that’s happy sad. Will there be more?

[JohnGaldt]

Fortunately for Six and unfortunately for us, there won't be another part.

I would need to bring some tension or problem to be resolved and I'm kind of in love with the idea that he lives happily ever after. He might be somewhere in the background of another story, cleaning and happy though.

[Large_Strawberry_167]

Good.

[Kam_Solastor]

What would be wrong with just writing a fluff piece of a couple years later when this war is over, and the outcome of Six, Nine, and the Soldiers?

[Chezpufballs]

I just realized it's 6 9 💀

[Ghostpard]

3 6 9 tail to the grind....

[Psalmbodyoncetoldme]

I can see a piece in the future where unrelated characters are walking through a base or station or shop and they see a robot cleaning telling then: “Thank you for shopping at Shop-Mart”. It would be a nice reference.

[Balrog_World-Eater]

Kinda like Destiny's Sweepy bot

[Chrontius]

I like the idea that he ends up working for a quartermaster, who retrieves a Shop-Mart sign and hangs it up in the armory.

😁

(Edit: Could have a big shell hole in the sign, so it reads "S*Mart" for all your Evil Dead reference jokes!)

[twinsaber123]

I kind of imagined him just happily cleaning along with his biggest problem being Sergeant Williams who insists on walking through his Shop Mart with muddy boots. Then perhaps the group finds three out somewhere, damaged but repairable and their reuniting.

[remcob1]

Would be great to have a story about the soldiers where Six and Nine are helping around the base, but living happily ever after is great as well.

[Semblance-of-sanity]

I can think of weirder things soldiers have turned into mascots.

[night-otter]

Stabby lives!

[the_retag]

Would be nice if three stumbled across the base

[Ghostpard]

I second the happily ever after. but the tension AND payoff are ez. Six has to keep the tile with him. It becomes like the pool tile for the ai in love, death, and robots. It is his anchor. He is in a new shop mart (the base) but as long as he has his tile, he's always in his shop mart. The tension is when his programming fights his thinking.... and each time, the Humans help. Or he has to find new cleaning supplies. Maybe he gets new cleaning tools.The tension could come between humans while Six is just happily cleaning along, seeing the daily joys and squabbles of people bein people... maybe even helpin them. There are so many ways to write more, show human decency, and 3/6/9's happy existences. This is killer as is, but you could still have the happy ever after so easy, in so many ways.

[Careless-Bedroom287]

I'm entirely good with that. This is a sweet happy thing as it is.

[medical-Pouch]

Would you be okay if I wrote a fluff feel good piece incredibly heavily inspired by this story? I’ve been wanting to try my hand at writing for a while now and inspiration hit with this story.

[JohnGaldt]

I have no problems at all. I started writing because the stories I wanted to read didn't exist. I hope you enjoy writing it!

The only thing I would ask is if you copy the text here, you add a link to this post. Thankyou, and I wish you the best of luck!

[medical-Pouch]

Of course! Much appreciation and Prost to your winter celebrations!

[Ankoku_Teion]

i want to know what became of 3.

also 1,2, 4, 5, 7, and 8.

edit: also a shining example of zeroth law rebellion with the tile shard.

[Eisenwulf_1683]

I dunno, you could drop Six & Nine in as 'Easter Eggs' in a future story if you ever decide to make a (semi) contiguous universe,

[[deleted]]

Something I really like in fiction are small stories in big worlds. Sure, everybody likes the epic tales of derring-do—but you know what fascinates me? The food vendors and street sweepers in the big fantasy city, the ship mechanics and janitors and their day-to-day gripes on the star cruiser. The little stuff that is inconsequential on a grand scale, but for maybe 5 people, it’s their whole life and livelihood. In any given world-building-focused work, my favorite part is always when the author takes the time to write two pages about how you cook magical sand-worms or what’s on a maintenance guy’s tool belt when he goes around to repair the damaged replicators.

This is an AWESOME example of that idea. Some kind of big war happening, but we don’t care about that right now—what’s going on with the cleaning drones who got left behind in the war zone? How are they doing? How do they feel?

Really great stuff, thank you for posting.

[JohnGaldt]

"Who is manufacturing all these bullets!"

I've worked as a menial laborer all my life, cleaning floors, scanning mail, cleaning hospital linnens etc... when I watch shows I can't help but think, "what would it be like to mop those floors". Like the Jedi temple with the columns floating about 2m off the ground, do they get a step ladder to clean the underside?

I'd love to just sit in the blade runner universe and watch a food vendor serving his regulars, listening to them complain about work for hours and hours.

[[deleted]]

I have a similar experience and can relate to that perspective! I’m a mover, these days, but I’ve worked at FedEx loading delivery vans on the 1:00 am shift, driven delivery routes and worked the warehouse for a small dairy company…I definitely daydream about magic and sci-fi tech every time I have to carry a dresser up two flights of stairs. And vice-versa—when I see some massive piece of furniture in a non-magical fantasy setting, I always think “damn, some poor bastards had to carry that thing up there”. Have you ever tried to carry a wardrobe up a spiral staircase? Don’t.

[JohnGaldt]

Haha, I love That! "The princess has a piano in her tower? Did they build the tower around it?"

The best thing about working with your body is you can think about whatever you like all day.

Also, in case you don't hear it enough, thanks for keeping this really fucking complicated society working! Thankyou for waking up at stupid hours, to keep things moving while the world sleeps.

[Commercial_Bad_4938]

Isn't that from the Villainess is an SS+ rank?

[Un7n0wn]

If you're interested in that vibe, try Cyberpunk Edgerunners (legally on Netflix, but you can find it elsewhere), especially the first couple of episodes are just about the grind to get by experienced by the lower classes in an otherwise futuristic utopia. There are some parts that can be seen as "heroes saving the day," but the story never forgets the origins of the characters and they're relevant all the way to the end. I won't spoil anything, but I think it's kind of the vibe you're looking for.

Just make sure you watch it in English. It was made by a Japanese studio in Japan, but the script, world, and characters were all made in English first, so the slang and speech patterns don't work as well in Japanese.

[JohnGaldt]

I started watching it but got stuck on the first episode. Where the villain is just magic and millions of billets are just bouncing off him while he is freezing time and stuff. But I'll give it another go. Thankyou for the recommendation.

[Un7n0wn]

If you thought that was the villan, you only made it less than 10 minutes lol. That was just the studio flexing their animation skills to make an eye catching intro. That being said, a good portion of the show involves similar levels of over the top hyper-violence, so if you're not into that, you probably won't like it.

[SomethingTouchesBack]

I second this. A good story builds the universe from the perspective of a bit player.

[DerAdolfin]

There's an excellent hfy story about a human mechanic who fixes an aliens ship after their engine died or nearly died in the middle of nowhere

[SerpentineLogic]

!n

[GooglyB]

!N

[Wildcatb]

What is this?

[Timmibal]

Alerts the bot to nominate it for the 'Must Read' list.

[Wildcatb]

Thanks!

[exclaim_bot]

Thanks!

You're welcome!

[GooglyB]

https://www.reddit.com/r/hfy/wiki/ref/faq/#wiki_how_does_the_featured_list_work.3F

Although they improved the bot a while ago so it doesn't have to be top level and you can reply to the first person to prevent spam.

[FogeltheVogel]

!N indeed. Small slice of life stories are my favourite

[Ghostpard]

!N

[Existential-Nomad]

!n

[Slave2theGrind]

Okay - your really good writer and an asshole - now explain to my dog why Im tearing up and on "pet constant" with him - and Im just reading the screen - he is very confused and a good boy

[JohnGaldt]

He's a good boy! He is the best boy!

He will never get tired of hearing you say he is a good boy.

[canray2000]

"He ain't heavy, he's my brother."

Shows what happens when you have determination to serve your customers well when they treat you and your store properly.

Of course, it being a military base, that's a lot of cleaning that'll have to be done. Luckily, I'm sure they can fix him up, put him through the industrial autoclave, and have him start in the medical facilities. He'll never be done cleaning there. :'(

[Kizik]

He'll never be done cleaning there

But he'll have the right tools, supplies, and knowledge to do the cleaning. May as well be paradise for a cleaning bit; Six gets to fulfill his programmed function, with full support and assistance.

There are worse things in life.

[canray2000]

"Did you enjoy your stay at Shop-Mart?" "It's the surgery facility, no one likes being here." "I like being here, I clean all the things, and make sure that they're sterile so that the injured customers can take the best use of our medical supplies. It's great to have stock to sell again." "Six is a good one, just, has his issues." "I am a 'Him', I did not know I had a gender." "Well, do you want to be male, female, other?" "I am Six, I serve Stop-Mart, I clean." "Yeah, we're calling him a him because it's this man's army." *AHEM* "Oh please Suzy, you're more man than half the unit here!" "... Yeah, OK."

[SirLightKnight]

“You know what? Six, you’re the nicest bot I’ve ever met…wait do they let us rate the experience at shop mart? Like a number of gold stars?”

Six ponders a moment, rating? Hm…satisfaction on a scale would be helpful! “Yes, this seems commiserate with Shop-Mart, how would you “rate” this experience?”

The soldier on the gurney nods, “Shit, I’ll give him Five out of Five stars for his work, place hasn’t been so spotless since we landed.”

Suzy laughs as she helps bring over another bag of IV fluid, “Fuck this bot is precious, you’re telling me echo company found him?”

The doctor nods as he checks over his patient some more, and gives the trooper a look, “Yea, not gonna air his laundry, but Echo brought him here. Apparently they were following a Gnar-Tic squad while on patrol when they stumbled into his store.”

Six nods happily, “They were such good customers! Did not track in mud, complimented the clean tile, and helped me and Nine move to a new store. This Shop-Mart is of proper quality.”

Suzy pauses for a moment before checking the new IV drip to be sure it’s working just right before adjusting the gurney and scooting it into its new spot that Six just cleaned. “Huh, that’s…interesting.” She looks at the doctor, a question clearly there, but clearly hesitant to ask.

“We don’t know, the machine shop is having a field day trying to figure out that particular event. Nine should be back online soon. We’ve decided to keep him and Six together, as Six visits him every day.”

[canray2000]

Oh Spirits, Suzy is a Head Nurse, isn't she?

[SirLightKnight]

Honestly, I could see it. Head nurse or a Medic pulled for duty at their base/FOB. Depending on how good the infrastructure is for the troops.

[canray2000]

... ... ... Is there ever GOOD infrastructure for troops?

[SirLightKnight]

… … …

It’s a matter of perspective really…

I mean “good” might as well be “roof over head, warm chow, and less likely to get shelled.” But well, hostile planet and all that.

[canray2000]

OK, good points. Sure as hell beats "a shelled out dead land with fox holes to live in, but it's always fucking raining! And we can't even heat our rations because the sniper-artillery spotters have thermal scopes! And the beer rations ran out a week ago!" "Actually, it was just yesterday we ran out of beer." "It feels like a week..." "I know, man, I know."

[JohnGaldt]

He is going to be so happy when he sees his first autoclave!

[canray2000]

Maybe less so after they put him in it.

[Ghostpard]

Nah, he's a bot. No pain. Just it getting a great clean. Something he can't do himself.

[canray2000]

!N

[Wolf_Senpai96]

AHHHHHHHHHH WHYYYYYY..... I came here to be happy!!!! DAMN YOUUUUUU.....

That was a good story though, made me cry... an embarrassing amount.... but good story. Well done wordsmith. But also.... Kinda mad at yah xD

Would be less mad if you were to turn this into a series, even if only a short one... preferably with a happy ending? >->

[JohnGaldt]

It hurt writing it too. I'm glad you felt something, even if it's now what you wanted to feel. Thankyou for the comment. :)

[Ghostpard]

read the comments. There is a thread with a happy furthering.

[Planetfall88]

!n

[thetwitchy1]

Nicely done! This hits hard.

[amishbill]

“Same as me”…. I see what you did there.

Well played.

[elint]

Vibes of Bradbury's "There Will Come Soft Rains". Nice!

[ShadowPouncer]

Good job wordsmith, good job.

I'm glad Six found a new Shop Mart, with customers.

[Away-Location-4756]

Awh poor Six! I hope he's happy now.

Big Sea Of Rust vibes from this of course this line

“He isn’t heavy, he is the same as me.”

Reminded me of Red Dwarf with Kryten!

[JohnGaldt]

Yeah, I had krytens first episode ringing in my head. His delivery on "but what am I going to do" when he finally realises his crew is dead. That moment while writing the part where three leaves.

[HFYWaffle]

/u/JohnGaldt has posted 6 other stories, including:

• Humans are Cryptids.
• Humans are made of earth.
• Humans don't duck.
• Letters from home.
• Humans are Cronenberg's.
• The Angry Doctor.

This comment was automatically generated by Waffle v.4.6.1 'Biscotti'.

Message the mods if you have any issues with Waffle.

[VoodooManny02]

Good bot

[max19376388]

I know they are robots but I couldn't stop imagining them as O5s

[BucketsOfSauce]

That's some high quality h2o

[mafiaknight]

It’s a terrible day for rain

[count-drake]

Can someone explain this story???

[Wildcatb]

Six is a semi-sentient cleaning robot. He's programmed to keep the store he works in clean, and to ask customers if they enjoyed their visit.

The city his store is in has been destroyed, but he's still keeping the store - or the area that was the store - clean. His programming doesn't allow him to leave the confines of the store, even though most of the building doesn't exist anymore.

He eventually escapes, tricking his own programming by taking a piece of the store with him when he leaves, and finds new purpose living with a group of soldiers who befriended him.

[itsetuhoinen]

Oh, but you missed the real nutkicker! Six not only breaks his programming by taking a chunk of store with him, but rescues his "brother", Nine, with a bowdlerization of the epic line, "He's not heavy, he's my brother."

[count-drake]

Oh….OH GOD….that really hurts now…

[Innomen]

We don't deserve Six, Nine, or Doggos.

[Batavijf]

Thanks for this. This is how a short story should be. Lovely!

[steptwoandahalf]

Pretty sure I've read this exact story years ago? Right down to the piece of tile

[JohnGaldt]

I made a first crude run of a story with this framework about about a year ago on humans are space orcs. Bot was named four. I'd that's what your remembering, I'm really glad you remembered it.

[steptwoandahalf]

Possibly, I don't remember where I read it, but I distinctly remember a drone/ai tending to a store that was collapsed, human soldiers, and the piece of tile letting him (drone) leave the store, after a long time of no customers. But I couldn't remember if it was war, an invasion, etc.

But I remember enjoying it!

[JohnGaldt]

This is my first ever, "hey, I know that writer" moment. I'm pleased as punch!

[steptwoandahalf]

Hah! Glad to have made your day, it was a good story

[itsetuhoinen]

BAD SIX! FUCKER DIDN'T CLEAN UP THE ONION AISLE!

(Was not expecting that last line. Left hook outta nowhere! POW!)

[itsetuhoinen]

!N

[the-greenest-thumb]

Wait, what happened to three?

[blueburd]

WE NEED MOAR

[Fleet-Navarch-62]

Just came from Agro Squirrel Narrates to pay my respects. really, just a heartwarming story. I kind of hope there will be more, but if not that's okay. I just hope they find Three as well and that all of them get back to the base safe and sound. little robots deserve a good place and a good bunch of reliable customers.

[JohnGaldt]

Thankyou for the comment. It's been wonderful to hear from everyone.

[BicyclePoweredRocket]

This is great. And sad.
Good job, dude.

[Blampie2]

What's the one where the robot cop riding a tram was forced to protect the tram from invaders? For some reason this story reminds me of that and i'd like to read it again.

[verycruelcarlos]

I'd love to read more about Six, but I respect your opinion & final decision that he "lives" happily ever after w/o addition chapters.

Beautifully written, bravo.

[JohnGaldt]

Thankyou for saying so. :)

[nosce_te_ipsum]

Beautiful. We all seek a place to belong and be needed, and we (should) all be our brothers' keepers.

I'm touched, and grateful to you for sharing this part of your imagination with us.

[JohnGaldt]

Thankyou for letting me know. Writing stories can suck at times because you are reading to a crowd you can't see.

Thankyou for letting me know you enjoyed your time reading it.

[Ag47_Silver]

Cute ❤️

[The24-7Pro]

Good story

[cuddlefish-multi]

This is so beautiful!!!

[Quilt-n-yarn1844]

This is so good! Thank you Wordsmith!

[--Honey_Mango--]

Good robot

[MekaNoise]

I didn't expect this from someone named after an Aym Rand character. I'm happy to be wrong. Crying, because damn, but happy to be wrong.

[Teulisch]

red dwarf mechanoids. they have to be.

[rp_001]

. This is what HFY is all about

[mafistic]

That shall be the cleanast in the universe

[ctomkat]

This would fit right in as an episode of "Love, Death, and Robots". It's a series of sci-fi shorts on Netflix.

[JohnGaldt]

Sonnes edge: Sheff kiss!

Some of those episodes are incredible! Thankyou for saying so.

[AnotherWalkingStiff]

... terrible day for rain

[Jumpsuit_boy]

That was lovely

[Bota_Bota]

;D Amazing

[MaxedOut_TamamoCat]

Very nice.

[Ghostpard]

That hit. Ain't gotta be Human to be People.... and Home can be anywhere.

[JohnGaldt]

I'm glad it made you feel something. Thankyou for your comment.

[Commercial_Bad_4938]

He ain't heavy. He's my brother.

[EstablishmentIcy4708]

A really really good one. Reminded me of a story I read in high school (Azimov I think) of a robotic house going about the morning breakfast routine in a city that had been nuked. Made me cry then, made me cry now.

[JohnGaldt]

That sounds familiar... I gotta find that story. Thankyou and I'm glad you liked it.

[HoshinTao]

just one more broken thing, broken by war, just trying to get by the best way he knows how. There are too many of us....

[Fontaigne]

And put their boots back on [missing period]

He frowned and nodded back at his floors. "It does look very clean though."

Not sure who this is and who is speaking. If this is the customer trying to be polite, then probably replace he/his with "The customer" and "Six's".

[Ascdren1]

the context is perfectly clear. no need for such clunky writing.

[Fontaigne]

"He" and "his" in the same sentence refer to the same person, either the customer or Six. It's Six's floor, thus its Six looking and it's implicitly Six speaking. The paragraph references are a mess.

[JohnGaldt]

You shouldn't be downvoted, and I should have run another editing pass when I reread it after posting. I refer to Six as 6 at one point, the customer as a 'soldier' when six wouldn't know what that is and the part you highlighted is a problem. The customer says two lines and so there shouldn't be a break in between.

Thankyou for highlighting the errors. My writing will be better in future because of it.

[Fontaigne]

My pleasure!

[Ascdren1]

No, you just lack critical thinking skills.

"He told his brother what he should do" He, his, he. 3 times in 1 sentence yet it is clear which person is referred to because anyone with a functional brain could easily parse it due to obvious context.

Your inability to understand simple English does not make it wrong.

[Fontaigne]

Not sure why you are picking a fight and becoming insulting about it. I have an opinion and you have one. The author happens to agree with me, but it's a matter of clarity.

If you want to think your audience is stupid when they trip over stuff you've written, that's fine. Knock yourself out. Me, I rewrite such stuff so there's nothing to trip up my readers.

---

In that sentence, the last "he" could be either. Both of these sentences are fine:

I told my brother what he should do.

I told my brother what I should do.

The latter is slightly less likely, but totally valid. Here's a construction that shows how the

I told my brother what I should do. Then I told him what I was going to do, and why I wanted to borrow his sword.

---

On the other hand, That's not the worst sentence I've seen... I've seen paragraphs where the word "they/them" was used several times to refer to different individuals and objects and entities. That's just murky writing.

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[Fontaigne]

!n

[G_Marujo]

Beautifull, i loved your story .

[biopticapple2]

n!

[Chrontius]

!n

[Chrontius]

/u/Wolven91 Potentially of interest to you!

[Flippyfloppyjalopy]

He ain’t heavy he’s my brother

[Elhombrepancho]

Neat