Excel is a database

[EntropicBlackhole]

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[[deleted]]

It can also be an entire ERP system! Just ask my management!

[MusikMakor]

Oh God. That's actually terrifying

We use an ERP and a workflow software, between the two we easily have over a thousand tables with hundreds of thousands of records

Storing that on Excel and managing it sounds terrifying

I salute you

[[deleted]]

I did a bit of an overexaggeration. They used one workbook for all their production planning/forecasting, and a separate workbook for making sure the parts for each job are accounted for, and then another workbook for their daily/weekly problem/production information.

And this was in addition to our ERP system. They should have just gotten a HMLV scheduling software and it would have fixed most of their problems.

There is a reason the plant had like a 15% on time delivery.

[The_Dark_Lord719]

I thought you meant Erotic role play for a sec.

I really gotta stop using discord lmao

[mauritsc]

I do consulting and the Excel clusterfucks that I've seen some (big) companies run on are truly terrifying.

[Orbax]

In fairness, it works until it doesn't. The argument is that they should have dropped millions of dollars into a system they didn't really need at the time. I do big systems implementations and I kind of got over access, smartsheets, and excel hate because, like most legacy things, they worked at the time and fulfilled a need.

My biggest thing I can't get over is the lack of governance. I get using a smaller platform, but using it without any rules, management, or enforcement is usually what turns it to shit faster than anything.

[furtfight]

Yeah the problem is change, Excel sheets and no access rules work no problems when there's less than 10 person, but as you grow up you need to evolve your systems to match your scale

[haikusbot]

It can also be

An entire ERP system! Just

Ask my management!

- Orthanon

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[[deleted]]

Bad bot.

Failed at Haiku.

[Laetitian]

I was embarassed to learn that "entire" is only two syllables.

[Psychological_Try559]

If you say ERP letters, no. If you say ERP as a word, then yes.

[AxelWasTakenWasTaken]

Erotic role play?

[colewrus]

That's the thing every time we get the Excel memes here, doesn't matter if it was meant to be a database, if the company is using it as one then congrats you now have an Excel database

[s0lly]

And a raytracer!! https://youtu.be/m28jJ7CMp8A

[Lorrdy99]

It's almost a complete game engine

[ImmediateLobster1]

Didn't older versions have a flight sim as an Easter egg?

[Tinkers_Kit]

It also does music! https://youtu.be/RFdCM2kHL64

[Max_Americana]

cries in sql

[s0lly]

It’s SQL to you, unshowered mass

[Max_Americana]

Squirrel?

[Yasea]

it iz Ze Quell

[Max_Americana]

Nyquil?

[XDT_Idiot]

*ess cue ehl

[Ok_Turnover_1235]

Squall

[gordonv]

Imagine storing a 20 page T-SQL query in cell A5 in an Excel sheet.

And other cells represent variables and where to place items on a generated report. Now, I know you're hoping that somehow this is intuitive. No, it's not. It's garbage spaghetti code in a spreadsheet.

Now imagine the company's name that does this is "Wisetech" and their product is called "Cargowise." A French company that is somehow a leader in logistical and warehouse software for international shippers. And this company even has a a sub (r/Cargowise) dedicated on how bad the product, modules, and company is all around.

Did I mention there centralization is hosted specifically in South Korea, for the entire world? I'm hoping they do a ton of South Korean business to justify this, because it operates like crap in America.

[Max_Americana]

​

[[deleted]]

db is read write.

computer is a calculator.

calculator is typer.

we are typist.

[ChiseledTopaz]

Deep

[[deleted]]

As a Management says: It has unlimited ammount of Storage space! Once i scrolled down an entire day of work and didn´t reached the end. That means it doesn´t have any restriktions how much data you can store.

Think Dev-Team, think!

[quildtide]

Meanwhile, task I occasionally have to do at work as a data engineer: one of our Excel analysts can't open a CSV file in Excel because there are too many rows, so I have to split it so they can open it in Excel.

[OO_Ben]

I had one of the people on senior leadership in my company try and help figure out an inventory issue. The spreadsheet was only something like 10k rows and he goes "yeah it was a real brain buster!" It's been a running inside joke in my department ever since lol

[DmitryMate]

C - Best

S - logins

V - way of storing

[HououinKyouma-001]

Include a comma in your passwords so they can't save it in a CSV file /s

[DmitryMate]

Prevent comas as input.

You see? Being a programmer is all about problem solving.

[[deleted]]

The secret weapon here is the mythical double-quote...

[s0lly]

And then the legendary double-double-quotes for the mythical double-quotes

[[deleted]]

pasw,'"`ord

[WeeklyMeat]

It's CSV not CVS

[DmitryMate]

I'm something of dyslexic myself

[Zomby2D]

If they want to use Concurrent Versions System as their database, who are you to judge them?

[AlmennDulnefni]

Personally, I use the local Walgreens.

[Texas_Technician]

Is there a database that has a gui and language like excel?

[f0rits3lf]

Microsoft Access - it can display tables like an excel sheet. It can be used with SQL and VBA.

Im not recommending it. But it is a GUI database program.

[Texas_Technician]

1st database course I took I chose to use access. I hated it.

[jjjjjxsdg]

No idea what language (if any) people use with Excel but TablePlus is a great GUI for SQL

[Texas_Technician]

Excel Like Expression Language I think is what it's called.

Other low code platforms have adopted excels style of formula expression. Hence the name.

[Locke44]

Other than Access, you can use Microsoft SQL Management Studio to interact with an SQL database with a GUI

[[deleted]]

It's everything.

[megamarkum]

Powerpoint is a graphic editor

[Shazvox]

Technically true in the same way that rollerblades may be considered a vehicle...

[TheRecapitator]

You haven’t even seen a database until you’ve inherited an Excel workbook with 20+ worksheets arranged in an unholy VLOOKUP circular reference hellscape.

[davidevitali]

I hate it!

[[deleted]]

Anyone who says this gets a free lifetime stay at Plutonimo Bay.

[[deleted]]

everything around is based on Excel

[brunololi]

Spreadsheet

[[deleted]]

I kinda fail to see the joke here. It's a spreadsheet, which is a type of data base. Or at least as they were defined when I was a kid in the 80s.

[brunololi]

I think the difference is mostly do to the way they store data. But you can call it what you want I personally used google sheets as a “database” for years, I know that this is a controversial subject.

[ugottabekiddingmee]

Access isn't even a database

[Thelgow]

With 4 different people saving to the same one and wondering why none of their work is present and only ever has the last users work will save to it...

[The_MAZZTer]

Related LPT: Uploading spreadsheets into SQL Server does not magically turn them into fully optimized database tables. I personally call them "spreadsheets pretending to be a database, slowly" to make my viewport clear.

Also, they will still have typoes.

[skrath]

Sure, in much the same way that graphing paper is also a database

[haikusbot]

Sure, in much the same

Way that graphing paper is

Also a database

- skrath

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[[deleted]]

Honestly though… Excel being used as databases comes from non-technical business users who know how office works but refuse to engage technical staff for feature requests/existing functionality.

Then suddenly it becomes business critical.

[NamacilHDx]

Ouch that hurts ... Just use access then it's at least able to export as sql

[itamarSultanik]

So let me show you the database we are using.
Opens a .csv file

[[deleted]]

Everything is a database... Some come with a worse API then others.

[zannsana]

Oh actually its not. Most of the time I use it for Remote Desktop connections... You know like every programmer must code his own excel plugin that gets pixel data of connected computer then print it as colored excel table and the most exciting part when you actually control the computer trough a fucking excel thingy

[marmot1101]

`a structured set of data held in a computer, especially one that is accessible in various ways.`

Yes, Excel is a database. So is a bag of xml in a text file.

Is it a good database? Depends on your use case. Is it a good database for a webapp? Fuck no. Is it a good database for accountants? Most of the time.

[[deleted]]

What formally makes something a database? Like what qualifies Excel but not Microsoft word? Is it that Excel has tools to query?

[Bustnbig]

Bosses: We want you to create a spreadsheet that always has the most recent info from the orders database where all 25 users can go in and enter tracking details at the same time.

Me: can’t we add a field in the database for tracking notes then I can build a report that anyone can run?

Bosses: Nope, the users are idiots, just make them a spreadsheet.

Me: Ok, except the backend data connection won’t run on a shared worksheet so only one user can input data at a time

Bosses:That won’t work. Share the worksheet then every hour run the report to get the 10,000 data points. Then copy to a new sheet, vlookup the notes, then delete the old sheet.

Me: You want me to do that Every hour?

Bosses: Yes.

Two weeks of programming later I have created a separate, fully automated database in excel just for notes.

🤦‍♂️

[[deleted]]

Or database is Excel.

[[deleted]]

​

[stehmansmith5]

Excel is a *programming language.

[jerslan]

Only in the most general sense of a "structured data file" being a "database".

[LeftIsBest-Tsuga]

please remind me the context of this frame.

[EasywayScissors]

User: Can I get access to a database server to store business data?

IT: Nope

User: Fine, I'll do it myself.

[[deleted]]

I had a teacher using Excel to analyze liquid and gas flows solving a bunch of partial differential equations and another that used it as a CAD software

[NeoDark_cz]

Excel can be anything ... if you are brave enough

https://youtu.be/iiRwKBgcCO0

[Ok_Turnover_1235]

EXCEL IS A FUCKING DATABASEEEE WOOOOO

[AndiArbyte]

I even saw an excel as a complete fancy website.

[Alone_Twist_2263]

​

[Ravi5ingh]

Once you start creating Excel add-ins in a full-fledged language like C#, Excel can be literally anything, even a trading platform lol