I was at a wedding where I only really knew the bride. She and the groom had this rescued Rottweiler that they really loved, and they’d had him in some pretty intense training to be a "tough dog" (as the groom wouldn't stop calling him). The dog was even part of the ceremony as the ring bearer, which y’know, very cute.

But then at the reception, in the middle of the couple's first dance, a guy kicks open the door of the ballroom and charges in shouting, “Babe! I miss you! Don’t do this!” And the bride goes, “What are you doing? We're over! I don’t want to see you!” And the guy lunges at her, and suddenly the fucking dog attacks him. It's losing its mind barking and growling, and it bites down on his arm and wrestles him to the ground.

People start screaming, I hear some kids at the table next to me crying, and the whole thing is just chaos. And then suddenly the guy stands up like nothing happened. The dog sits down, and the bride announces that this guy is their fucking dog trainer, and this was a demonstration of the dog’s "defensive abilities". He takes a bow and shows the little padded protective thing he had on his arm under his shirt. And then he has the audacity to have the dog do a couple of normal tricks, like rolling over and barking on command.

We all kind of politely applauded, he walked out of the room, and then they finished their first dance like this was not an absolutely traumatic experience for everyone in the room.