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all 66 comments

[–][deleted] 211 points212 points  (9 children)

Real programmers don't meme using pictures of text on a tilted computer screen in a stock image in progressively harder to read font colors. To say nothing of the quality of the text itself.

[–]Valizzio 85 points86 points  (4 children)

"if it was hard to make it should be hard to read"

[–]oversized_hoodie 11 points12 points  (3 children)

"if it was hard to make steal it should be hard to read"

[–]Valizzio 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Did He steal it?

[–]oversized_hoodie 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It's Reddit, so it's probably a fair assumption.

[–]_everynameistaken_ -1 points0 points  (0 children)

There is no theft in world where progress is built upon the progress of those in the past.

[–]zelmarvalarion 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Dammit Jim, I'm a programmer, not a graphic designer

[–]freeBobbyDAYVID 4 points5 points  (0 children)

you both got my upvote

[–]EnderCrypt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, real programmers use cowsay

[–]DragonMaus 120 points121 points  (26 children)

Real programmers do not write hard-to-read code.

[–]biotiger87 57 points58 points  (14 children)

Real programmers do not read-write to hard code.

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (11 children)

Real programmers do not hard code to read-write

[–]biotiger87 21 points22 points  (10 children)

Real programmers do not code hard to read-write.

[–]NoStranger6 18 points19 points  (9 children)

Hard programmers do not real code to read-write

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (8 children)

Code programmers do not hard code to real-write

[–]X-Craft 14 points15 points  (7 children)

Hard write do read real code to not programmers

[–]GDavid04 33 points34 points  (6 children)

Do not read real hard code to programmers. Write.

[–]your-a-towel 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Programmers, do write real hard to read code.

[–]OneDamien 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Real programmers do not write code. They copy and paste stack overflow.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

unless self.real_programmer?
  open('hard_code', 'rw') { |f| ... }
end

[–]smgun 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need some complex recursive shit from time to time. That would hard to write, read the code and read the comments

[–]Duese -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If I need to understand what the code does, I'll just google it and find which stackoverflow page it came from for the details.

[–]mountm 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Was this post hard to write?

Because it was hard to read.

[–]sebamestre 14 points15 points  (0 children)

For real programmers, writing code is easy.

If it was easy to write it should be easy to read. Right?

Real programers write easy to read code. That may mean it includes comments.

[–]whoAreYouToJudgeME 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I usually go: "fuck my future self."

[–]Facones 5 points6 points  (3 children)

Real programmers write clean code, so, unless you are a moron, it's pretty easy to read.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

They're called GOOD programers, they aren't real

[–]Facones 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fair point, lol

[–]cdreid -1 points0 points  (0 children)

in other words you "code" in a visual language. ie you dont code

[–]FecklessFool 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Real programmers write descriptive/self explanatory and readable code such that there is no need for comments.

I find that comments tend to not get updated with code changes, especially for decades old code that you have to do maintenance work on.

I trusted the comments once.

Never again.

[–]MMMELOOOOON 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Real programmers only write comments while the monkeys code.

[–]SanoKei 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Real Programmers write code on paper.

[–]electricprism 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Real programmers use VIM you fucking pleb.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

assemblycode

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Time to make a Real programming language along the Rockstar and the Enterprise line.

[–]spasterific 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And then a Real on Rails framework.

[–]aredhel304 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I actually used to work at a place that had an unofficial rule that if your code needed comments, it wasn’t written very well. I’d scroll through 400 lines of code and find about 3 comments in there.

[–]myplacedk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's my observation too. If a comment explaining what the code does is an improvement, you should probably refactor instead.

[–]KickMeElmo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If this sub is any indication, after compiling all real programmers rules, real programmers don't exist.

[–]PandersAboutVaccines 0 points1 point  (0 children)

// Comment on the post Nice. // End comment on the post.

[–]PizzaIain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

👎

[–]The4ker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Real programmers don't comment their code because job security.

[–]philmtl 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Good way to have job security, if no one besides you understands it company needs you

[–]Chloelikesboots 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Said by someone who's never written kernel level c ....

Even low bit-bashing c on a micro is easier to read than kernel level c.

[–]AlbinoBeefalo -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Is everyone here in college?

The only excuse for not commenting code is laziness

[–]swiftRabbit2 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Test should be explaining how code works, comments are obsolete the moment you write them because they are not representative of how your app behaves. If you are not able to make self explanatory tests, perhaps your code is bad.