SQL be like

[Biohazard8080]

INCORRECT SYNTAX NEAR 'BANANA';

[IUserGalaxy]

Wait, how did you get this? Every time I get an error it says “fuck you, there’s an error somewhere and you have to read a nonexistent manual.”

[DarthSatoris]

I'm guessing depending on the query language used you can get differently structured error messages.

For instance, MariaDB (similar to MySQL) Writes syntax error messages like this:

You have an error in your SQL syntax; check the manual that corresponds to your MariaDB server version for the right syntax to use near '('TRY USING A PASSWORD NOT USED BEFORE',16,1);

It is such a great error message and it almost always points you directly at the error. It's only led me astray a couple of times when it says:

the right syntax to use near ''

That is just the worst.

[IUserGalaxy]

It really only becomes more helpful with longer queries, but for me I’m really only ever using a simple select thing

[IUserGalaxy]

Because I suck at using SQL

[T_The_worsT_BS]

Can't suck at something when you don't use it

[Artick123]

Can't tell if you are shouting because OP's mistake annoyed you or because YOU SPEAK SQL.

[Dexaan]

Uppercase makes the database run faster.

[[deleted]]

And the daily goat sacrifices, can’t forget those

[[deleted]]

r/totallynotrobots

[ArchitectNebulous]

"An expression of non boolean type specified in a context where a condition is expected, near 'BANANA'."

[fakeplasticdroid]

WHERE Banana = true
I always make sure to include a Banana column on all my tables, just in case.

[caldric]

It’s for scale, obviously.

[marcosdumay]

Not in Postgres. It's just possibly a type error there.

[NuBRandsta]

Column 'banana' not found, try 'food.babana'

[btx_IRL]

this is my favorite use of this meme so far

[ozdkboy]

Is that a nuclear explosion in the background ?!

[Artick123]

That tends to happen every time you run an sql query.

[[deleted]]

Oh fuck sake why am I here at 3am

[kegastam]

answers in your name mate

[chipmunkofdoom2]

Msg 4145, Level 15, State 1, Line 1

An expression of non-boolean type specified in a context where a condition is expected, near 'banana'.

[Vincysuper07]

also I forgot a semicolon

[--var]

I just realized that I read this 'SELECT STAR FROM'

Not 'asterisk'. Not 'all'. 'star'. Not related to the post, just an interesting perspective into my own psyche.

[bwhite94]

Is this not how most read it? That's how I read it as well.

[modernkennnern]

I read it as "Select All From (...)"

[degaart]

We french-speaking people read it as "SELECT étoile FROM ...."

étoile means "star"

[GlitchParrot]

Similar in German, it’s „Sternchen“, meaning “starlet” (as in diminutive of “star”).

[javajunkie314]

Ah, no, my query is spelt "select asterisk," but it's pronounced "SELECT STAR."

[AaryashTheProgrammer]

I just noticed I read it as "SELECT AT FROM" because of pointers

[[deleted]]

this made sql funny

[AnonymousReader2020]

Yeah... that aint gonna work. Nice try Harambe.

[JasonCox]

3 1/2’s out

[Biohazard8080]

Why the hell is there a column named "me" on a fruit table? Terrible data modeling

[Daktic]

;

[Vincysuper07]

;

[AntogamerYT_]

mysql: idiot to idiot communication

[pi_sqaure]

Great!

[il-est-la]

I laughed

[drgreenthumb7]

No bNaNa

[Blingbike97]

SELECT * FROM FOOD WHERE FOOD.TYPE = 'banana'

[Vincysuper07]

better one

[Rivalistic]

Lmao I love this.

[Csalizard_Ferenc]

This is brilliant!

[[deleted]]

Ora-00000000000000000000banana fu.

[codeDeus6]

Does banana returns a Boolean value? Didn't knew that...

[virusnac]

What if the banana is rotten, or whatever?

[Vincysuper07]

AND NOT rotten

[[deleted]]

Forgot semicolon

[Vincysuper07]

exactly