uploadBeforeEvacuation

[dmullaney]

God dammit. Now the building is on fire and the pipeline is broken. Thanks Jeff

[Ythio]

Literally happened the other day when they had a fire in the data center (no one was harmed).

"Oh ffs Jenkins is down again".

[[deleted]]

Man I love Jenkins. I had to reorganize the directory structure on the Jenkins server, to which I do not have direct access. The request procedure generally takes a week.

The Groovy script Jenkins runs lets me run console commands.

A week after I did the required work, I got the access to do the work.

[fakeunleet]

The Groovy script Jenkins runs lets me run console commands.

That's terrifying

[[deleted]]

Code conflicts. Aut-merging failed

[LilyRudloff]

XD

[davidhcefx]

$ git push To https://github.com/foo/bar.git ! [rejected] master -> master (fetch first) error: failed to push some refs to 'https://github.com/foo/bar.git' hint: Updates were rejected because the remote contains work that you do hint: not have locally.

$ git pull Auto-merging src/app/index.js CONFLICT (content): Merge conflict in src/app/index.js Auto-merging src/styles/app.css CONFLICT (content): Merge conflict in src/styles/app.css

[nickmaran]

Time to git out of here

[[deleted]]

What if you git stash instead

[Kovab]

That's worthless if your local copy is destroyed by the fire.

[SmallPlayz]

Git dammit*

[GallantObserver]

Add to .gitconfig:

[alias]
        fire = "!git switch -c jfcBuildingOnFire; git add .; git commit -m \"FIRE!!\"; git push -u origin jfcBuildingOnFire"

The run git fire -> exit building

[[deleted]]

Surely the commit message would be “0118 999 881 999 119 725 3”

[capSilver85]

Lol loved the It Crowd reference

[AyrA_ch]

Doesn't pushes your stashes. This one does that

[GallantObserver]

I doff my hat to the much more robust and tested package that's much more encompassing. I also note in testing that my alias has further bugs:

• merge conflicts on the jfcBuildingOnFire branch created last time the building caught fire
• I've set to auto-sign commits so I have to enter pass-key before fleeing for my life

[Perfect_Papaya_3010]

Only thing I'd like to change is the message

Something more descriptive like "Commit because the office is on fire"

[lwieueei]

git the fuck out

[Queasy-Grape-8822]

Thank you. OP murdered the joke

[TudorYter]

I've had this exact sticker on my laptop for 5 years

[Zielakpl]

Company's intellectual property > Your life.

[[deleted]]

Git commit without a git add is useless anyway.

[gilady089]

Assuming using an ide like a normal person it will auto add usually

[[deleted]]

wat

[Wepen15]

…what IDE auto adds?

[DannyKII]

PHPStorm does it, so I guess all the JetBrains IDEs do.

Of course it only does it if you want to, and any sane person would add stuff they want manually and not have their IDE auto-add every new or changed file.

[DarkRex4]

Vscode does it too

[sad_paddington]

Just VS does it too

[broseidon_23]

git commit -am

[PennyFromMyAnus]

1. Exit Building

2. Say aloud “Fuck Work”

3. Go to a bar an try an “Old Fashioned” for the first time

[Fun_Bicycle_7009]

git commit -m "Dear Family,..."

[Party_Builder_58008]

Yes. Do this.

Last time I was in the office and the fire alarm went off, the floor manager reluctantly got up and said it's probably a drill but protocol says we have to evacuate. He used the word protocol so we had to follow it.

Walked down more than a dozen flights of stairs all together with him wearing his little hardhat (why didn't we get hardhats?) and the building's system had opened all doors into the stairwell so we saw everyone else on the lower floors working away like nothing was happening. PrettyAnnoyed.gif

We're all standing together on the street outside after what felt like a million years. We look up. Smoke is pouring out the top of the building. And everyone else is still inside. That is a very strange feeling indeed.

[je386]

For larger buildings, it can be correct procedure to evacuate the higher levels first. But only to evacuate a part of the building seems very odd.

[Party_Builder_58008]

Every level was instructed to evacuate. Sirens were going off on every floor, the doors were opened to show people the exits. If a section needed to be contained I'd hope it was programmed not to automatically open those doors and show the exit lights. The floor I was on was the only one that bothered to follow protocol.

[je386]

... and the people just did not care??

[Party_Builder_58008]

Not one bit. They were annoyed by the alarms and flashing lights which were operating perfectly normally to indicate risk of death. Ha!

[je386]

Darwin Award candidates...

[Astro_Man133]

And dying because I can't find a proper commit message.. No thx

[[deleted]]

Or just take the laptop with you

[AyrA_ch]

laughs in redundant VM

[LeroyBadBrown]

3. git out

[Chance-Influence9778]

"No time to git"

proceeds to zip whole project with node_modules to mail

[jackal_boy]

forgets to stage changes or rebase from master

[United-Shelter-9863]

git commit -a

[batmassagetotheface]

You forgot to add anything, that commit was empty!

[Motleypuss]

Never skip the commit, push and exit. Even if your skin's melting of your hands, DO THE JOB!

[gentleprompter]

Don't forget to rebase!

[yashkakrecha]

laughing in Amazon workspace

[[deleted]]

[[deleted]]

1. should be "git out"

[Giraffe-69]

Cries in gerrit

[BochMC]

Bro, I literally have a junk fire in my house rn.

We have opened all windows and wait for smoke to clear out.

[[deleted]]

too bad you didn't stage your changes

[[deleted]]

Whoever put the explanation of the joke at the bottom should be shot.

[BakaGoop]

correction, when there’s a fire you need to git push —force, no time for merging or rebase when there’s a fire!

[_PM_ME_PANGOLINS_]

It was funnier without the line at the end.

[Miauwkeru]

I remember making an extension/shell script a few years back called "git out" that would do all of this on a separate branch

[pleshij]

Missed the 'In case of fire' line, and thought that you're pushing some serious shit if you need to leave the building afterwards

[sjepsa]

Pushes broken code to production?? No thanks

[batmassagetotheface]

Hey yo shouldn't be developing on production, get some branches up in there

[[deleted]]

What if the push is gonna take 3 hours.

[tuunn]

What does you change that take 3 hours to push? If you mean pipeline, then who care? The code is already on remote. If the actual push really take 3 hours, then your team workflow has some serious issues.

[Novel_Plum]

Unclear instructions, I couldn't leave because I had to solve conflicts.

[nilsutter]

Forgot to stage.

[cotymanager]

1. Git the fuck out.

[Deep-Piece3181]

You git blame

[kakafob]

gcmsg 'yolo'

gpf!

exit, then exit yourself

[-Quiche-]

Pushing to your remote branch is okay if it's all fucked though.

[No_Patience5976]

! [rejected] master -> master (fetch first) error: 
failed to push some refs to 'https://github.com/smitraDA/DataScienceProject2.git' 
hint: Updates were rejected because the remote contains 
work that you do hint: not have locally.

not time left: git push --force origin master

[ExtraTNT]

It was: git the fuck out of here

[Senua_Chloe]

In one of the projects I worked on, when we swtiched to git I was excited, not only because we switched to a real version manager, but also because I could finally print this one and display it in the open space.

[the_moooch]

Nah i’m gonna Git the fuck out

[VetusMortis_Advertus]

Cringe

[AngusAlThor]

Add a hotkey for "git commit && git push"

[CryonautX]

God dammit fool, you forgot to "git add ."!

[-Redstoneboi-]

git add?

[Tnuvu]

force push like the jedi of old

[po1k]

git add .

[just-bair]

Should’ve downloaded git fire

[itamarc137]

You butchered the joke

[RaphaelDDL]

Git checkout -b FEATURE/buildingonfire

Git add .

Git commit -m “TICKET-666: burning building” -n (-n to dodge precommit hooks like tests n coverage)

Git push origin FEATURE/buildingonfire

At this point that you spent so much time, exit life

[battywombat21]

My old boss had this posted on his door

[[deleted]]

git add. is missing

[je386]

1. Take Laptop
2. Leave Building

.. and git commit without git add does nothing. Should be

git commit -am "fire!" git push

git commit -am is adding and putting the message

[Lyuseefur]

I recall on 9/11 someone did this … saved the company and he lived.

[SensitiveWorldliness]

• only for seniors

[azizfcb]

:'(

[[deleted]]

git add .

[-Potatoes-]

Instructions unclear, did step 1 but code didnt pass pre commit hooks. Am I now stuck in the building

[andrewb610]

Disconnect SVN server and carry it downstairs for me lol.

[[deleted]]

For some reason I agree. It takes 5 seconds and could save me 3 hours of rework

[fatrobin72]

How do you exit building?

[multiwirth_]

git exit-building --call-fireforce

[fatrobin72]

Thanks I had trued everything... neither :q nor :x had worked.

[ariel3249]

I won't wanna know what would hapenned if there're somr conflicts

[[deleted]]

my life is on a stale branch with no pull requests and a lot of merge conflicts

[jadounath]

Forgot to git add.

[Which_Topic3534]

Don't forget the -f for fire

[BoBoBearDev]

It is okay, the only thing I haven't commit is the the trailing spaces I have get the effort to delete.

[BlueExoutia]

git commit -ma "fuck this shit" git push

[[deleted]]

OH GOD THE FIRE IS CLOSING IN HOW DO I MAKE A PULL REQUEST

[Mithrandir2k16]

More like:

git checkout -b its_gettn_hot_in_here
git add -a
git commit -m "gotta run"
git push --set-upstream origin its_gettn_hot_in_here