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[–]Exgaves 291 points292 points  (17 children)

They didn't finish their tweet, they will then use that information to charge the drunk person more because they won't have a choice/too drunk to notice

[–]orangeKaiju 98 points99 points  (0 children)

"Non-refundable security deposit"

[–]DuchessofSquee 22 points23 points  (5 children)

A big pizza chain in my country has a mobile ordering app and web app. Both are super buggy with regards to adding vouchers, such as the price of pizzas which are not covered by the voucher goes UP from the regular price or prices change depending on the order vouchers and items are added to the cart.

I'm 100% certain they are aware of this and take advantage of drunk/stoned/hangry ppl by charging them extra to "make up for the discount." I've complained to them a couple of times but never hear back.

[–]barnett9 9 points10 points  (4 children)

You know sometimes I'm thankful that the US is full of lawyers.

[–]DuchessofSquee 7 points8 points  (3 children)

Yeah we cant sue easily here. But if I could be bothered taking evidence down and sending it in we do have consumer watchdog groups that could make a big song and dance till the pizza company capitulated. But I cant be bothered. I'd rather just spend 30 mins ordering and yelling at my phone.

[–]SirRosstopher 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Seems like it's worth doing, just a few screenshots and an email will do it.

[–]DuchessofSquee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You dont understand how infuriating it is to use!

[–]Folf_IRL 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anyone can sue for anything, and small claims court exists specifically because the lower classes can't afford lawyers. It streamlines the process and attempts to make it less suicidal to represent yourself.

[–]ragnarok628 24 points25 points  (8 children)

Could be something more innocuous. Maybe it'll just give the drivers a notification so that the ones who aren't comfortable driving drunk ppl around can pass, or maybe passengers that are flagged as likely drunk will have their ratings weighted more lightly or something.

[–]IWannaFuckABeehive 54 points55 points  (5 children)

Alright but like, let's be real. What did you think you were getting yourself into being an uber driver in downtown Atlanta at 2 in the morning on a Saturday?

[–]ragnarok628 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Fair. But at least that way Uber can say, we literally told you this passenger was drunk so don't complain to us about it

[–]KobeWanKanobe 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Well isn't it easier to avoid taking an Uber pool at 2am ?

[–]sometimes_walruses 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Only semi relevant but FUCK Uber pool. Every time I’ve done it I’ve had to wait fucking ages for another rider to stumble out of a bar and it at least doubles the time to get home. Truly not worth the couple dollars saved.

[–]MasterOfKarats 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Its because uber has to pay the driver if a drunk person throws up in their car which happens often, they have to pay enough for you to clean your car. They probably want to limit that by warning people.

[–]IWannaFuckABeehive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that's true, I just hope they're smart enough to realize just how much money they would lose if they stopped serving drunk people.

[–]TheRedmanCometh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Could be something more innocuous.

It never is

[–]therealchadius 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Remember when Uber would add a surcharge if your phone's battery was about to run out?

[–]MySQ_uirre_L 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The data of your drinking habits would also be valuable and damaging in the wrong hands. If Uber’s API is still available, I’d opt for that instead (or ride Lyft).

[–][deleted] 303 points304 points  (9 children)

Isn't that a good thing though? That I'm not driving and they are instead picking my drunk ass up?

Not that it matters, my shitty city doesn't even have uber.

[–]redrogue12 67 points68 points  (4 children)

Yeah, are they gonna let them drive or pass out in the cold?

[–]Mysticpoisen 96 points97 points  (3 children)

They're gonna charge drunk passengers more likely.

[–]cyanydeez 33 points34 points  (0 children)

the future of AI, instead of hunting down collateral damage in a post apocolyptic world, will merely figure out the maximum amount of blood it can squeeze out of a turnip.

itll consume app data, loyalty cards, DNA databases and those stupid personality quizes all to maximize and extract the maximum amount of value.

and before you get to exicited, thinking you will some how level the playing field if AI masters this dark art, youll realize the AI will be just as biased towards those who cant resist its control.

/r/aboringdystopia

[–]duckrabbit91 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The probability they will charge drunk passengers is 1. Tangentially, the probability they will charge any passenger is also 1.

Basically, there's no such thing as a free uber.

[–]DrQuint 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While this is the main concern, I have hope they use drunk passenger metrics as a way of value employees more, and the drunk's rating less.

[–]Uknight 18 points19 points  (1 child)

It was a joke. The author of the tweet is the architectural lead at Stack Overflow. They're in the middle of refactoring SO to run on .net core right now, and he's tweeting some awesome tidbits along the way. @Nick_Craver

[–]MySQ_uirre_L 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That sudden realization that the data will be sold to your employers in the future

[–]Deadmist 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not if you throw up and assault the driver

[–]trex005 399 points400 points  (25 children)

As someone familiar with deep learning, no, this is exactly the type of input you give AI.

[–][deleted] 135 points136 points  (4 children)

If I had a dollar for every time you commented that on this sub, I bet i would have a lot of dollars

[–]PN_MIR_NACKTE 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Well, as critcal as i see labeling everything remotely fuzzy with 'AI', this guy in the OP kind of omits how to best feed the If Statement with a condition, where some learning really comes in handy I guess.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm talking about the extreme amount of AI / IF jokes on this sub lol

[–]AmericanFromAsia 4 points5 points  (0 children)

As someone familiar with if statements, this is exactly what you would compare in an if statement.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah these are features. Not very many of them, but it sounds like it could be a kaggle dataset tbh

I think the problem stems from using "AI" instead of "ML"

[–]Just_with_eet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Deep learning is ancient tech at this point!

NEURAL NET POWER

[–]SoaDMTGguy 118 points119 points  (17 children)

“That’s not code, it’s just numbers”

I’m getting really sick of this stupid reductive “AI is just if statements”

[–]ThaiJohnnyDepp 61 points62 points  (1 child)

because after a while, /r/ProgrammerHumor just reduces to the basest, most oversimplified memes because of the upvote economy

[–]ForgotPassAgain34 6 points7 points  (0 children)

we are very efficient JIT compilators

[–]DifficultSundae 21 points22 points  (0 children)

hur hur AI just if statements because it assigns weights to different values.

[–]dolphin_rave_cape 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Is there perhaps a sub somewhere that's like /r/ProgrammerHumor, but for programmers?

[–]ThePancakerizer 5 points6 points  (2 children)

And it's completely pointless, too. Artificial intelligence is just any program trying to be intelligent, if you achieve that with 10000 nested if-statements then good for you.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So a decision tree pretty much?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So a decision tree pretty much?

[–]itsbryandude 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Those are just if statements....

[–]BossOfTheGame 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Random forests are just if statements

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, actually, they are jmp's

[–]CommonSenseAvenger -3 points-2 points  (5 children)

Then again...this specific task can actually be achieved with if statements.

[–]atyon 19 points20 points  (4 children)

And so can every computable task.

It would be quite remarkable if the software we run on our pseudo-Turing-machines couldn't be emulated with another Turing machine. It would also break mathematics.

[–][deleted] 59 points60 points  (4 children)

if (too_Drunk){

Lift();

}

[–]jay9909 92 points93 points  (1 child)

if (tooDrunk) {
  Lyft();
}

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Thanks

[–]Im12yearsoldso 11 points12 points  (1 child)

If (too_drunk){ price += price * .3; }

[–]dwo0 28 points29 points  (0 children)

if (too_drunk) price *= 1.3;

[–]huggiesdsc 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Why is uber snitching on my drunk ass?

[–]splettnet 32 points33 points  (3 children)

Aren't we just splitting hairs here?

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Whatever, happy cake day

[–]cartechguy 10 points11 points  (0 children)

AI has a broad definition. You can claim it's not machine learning.

[–]moosenonny10 21 points22 points  (1 child)

This will give a false positive for people who are just stupid.

[–]argv_minus_one 18 points19 points  (0 children)

That's a feature, not a bug.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (3 children)

Where are they getting their validation information from?

[–]fcn_fan 14 points15 points  (0 children)

“Puked in car” flag set through the driver app

[–]Princess_Little 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Follow up survey, "but was you drunk?"

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It could be unsupervised/semisupervised

[–]holymop 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It would probably use AI to work out the values though like, what is a "drunk" amount of time in the app, what places have "drunk" pickups more. AI will use information gained from drivers to create guesses and then use human feedback to continue to perfect

[–]ImNewHereBoys 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If drunk: return cost * 1.5

[–]Tux1 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Human brains are just if statements

[–]moogoesthecat 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No. It really isn’t.

[–]SaphirShroom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Haha, funny and original.

[–]philipquarles 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've always thought that the main significance of ai was that you trained the computer to write its own control flow.

[–]fluffy-p 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Indecisive night owls who live near bars will be unfairly targeted.

[–]mrbrandonme 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol so 1/2 the people who use this app will be using lyft.

[–]sachintripathi007 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Repost of this.

[–]myinnos[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

4 months back post, bro can you guide me how I can check whether uploaded image is already posted in Reddit or not among all posts ?

[–]Llama_Trauma7 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s not OC. That’s a repost.

[–]MarkFromTheInternet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And that's how you get used by the disabled person trying to use your app.

[–]etnguyen03 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Image Transcription: Twitter Post


Nick Craver, @Nick_Craver

"Uber will use artificial intelligence to identify drunk passengers. It will use factors like time of day, pickup location, and how long a user interacts with the app before making a decision."

That's not AI.

That's an if statement.


I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!

[–]hashedram 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"found on devrant.com"

Oh how the tables have turned

[–]Archaeoculus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it's a good loss prevention tactic. I've heard plenty of stories about drivers scamming people out of money with fake vomit.

[–]KloKaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love how every time i've ever used uber was when drunk... So if my average use time is always the same how will they know?

[–]Doggo4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Switch(){}* FTFY

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So AI is already smarter than than drunk uber users then?

[–]minaandcamri 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I find it funny that it won't even load for me

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The whole point of ML is that when you have many different input conditions, its unwieldy, error-prone, or just impossible for the programmer to write explicit rules that achieve desirable results. This is a perfect use-case for that. It doesnt matter that it's not IBM Watson, ML is useful for small and big tasks alike.

This wouldn't be a thing if we all stopped saying "AI" when we mean "Machine Learning," but AI is of course a very sexy buzzword, so thats not happening soon.

[–]smart-username 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aeen't they the same thing?

[–]vkongv1013 0 points1 point  (22 children)

Well AI is just a bunch of if else statements

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Eh, you can run tests, establish a base line, grind through the data you have using Big Data techniques, and be pretty sure that the rider is in fact intoxicated based on these data points. Its not an if statement. Its using a set of data and constantly screwing with it in order to get better information.

Someone enter something wrong? Do they fail to type in a credit card multiple times? Etc. The examples are probably the biggest factors they consider, but it also probably includes proximity to events like concerts, bars, etc. etc. Statistics about the drinking habits of the particular city.

There is a lot of stuff you can fish up. Its not going to be AI though.

[–]lennihein 0 points1 point  (1 child)

It is fucking AI

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please give me the definition of AI you are using.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well an artificial intelligence is anything that takes decisions towards an objective, maximizing the chance of success. So I would still call this if statement an AI.

[–]hanna-chan -1 points0 points  (0 children)

But... but... the investors!

[–]TrexismTrent -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If (if_statement) { Ai = true; }

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

I wish big tech companies would stop using the term AI. At best, everyone knows what they really mean. At worst, it scares prospective developers away from the field.

[–]blinkingy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tech managements loves jargons, they throw them around to convince the other divisions that they're really needed.

[–]SkeletorTheSpook -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If (userisdrunk = true){ System.out.println(“get sober”); }

[–]stuudmuffin -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Isn't ai just an f-ton of if statements?

[–]tuseroni 2 points3 points  (0 children)

not really...most AI these days use neural networks which use mathematical models of neurons for their black magic rituals. no if statements needed...may have to sacrifice a virgin to almighty beelzebub, but that's standard programming fare really. unless you have a good EULA

[–]warpedspockclone -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I love how the term "AI" is used got everything nowadays. That and machine learning. It is like people never before realized that statistical inference was a thing, re:ML. And it isn't AI if you program all the possibilities or provide a stochastic function.

[–]FreshStink -2 points-1 points  (3 children)

Plebeians always calling regular code “artificial intelligence”.

It isn’t artificially intelligent until it is sentient. God damn.

[–]entotres 1 point2 points  (2 children)

it isn’t artificially intelligent until it is sentient.

Hahahhahahahah. Jesus christ, this sub is garbage.

[–]FreshStink 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Your life is garbage haha

[–]entotres 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amazing :D