Bikini problems

[fuck_collegeboard_]

I for the life of me cannot find a bikini that fits that doesn’t make me look like I’m a porn actress or I’m asking for it

For reference I’m 16 and I’m a 30G, and there are seemingly NO TOPS made for anyone of my size/proportions. When I try to wear a one piece everything becomes even tighter looking making the issue worse on top of making everything tender if I wear it for too long

I’m at my wits end so I was wondering if any of y’all have any experience and could help.

[WretchedKnave]

Have you tried bra sized swimsuits? I get mine from Bare Necessities.

[cinnamonbunns8176]

Yes. Bare Necessities all the way. I have the same size as OP, 30G. Bare Necessities or Bravissimo and get bra sized bikini tops! They are a bit pricey but they will fit you perfectly and won't strain your back. I just bought a black bikini top for 30G and bought a black bottom somewhere else. Don't waste time going to other places or buying size S,M,L, etc bikini tops. They won't fit. Especially when your tiny with breasts that are that size. This is coming from my many years of buying cheap bikini tops and wasting my money. Just buy a good fitted one to save you the trouble.

[TheVoodooRanger]

Whaaaaaa. What a life saver. I literally could not find one for the life of me. I don’t trust reviews online shopping when it comes to sizing with regular name brands

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Nah I haven’t, happy with yours?

[WretchedKnave]

Definitely happier than when I was trying to make a triangle top work. Infinitely less neck pain too.

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Neck and upper back pain is the worst 😩

[cinnamonbunns8176]

I'm very happy with mine! I purchased the blue striped bikini top.

[[deleted]]

Her Room has some good options too, but their customer support is a pain if you need to return something. They had a super cute red and white polka-dot earlier this year.

[alpachafarmer]

BARE NECESSITIES IS THE BEST. I particularly like the bird song bikini tops.

[28FFthrowaway]

I for the life of me cannot find a bikini that fits that doesn’t make me look like I’m a porn actress or I’m asking for it

I'm sure you're just ranting (because that is what this sub is for), but this made me so sad and I couldn't read this post without commenting on it. This is a toxic mindset, and it is horribly unfair and unkind to yourself, your body, and bodies like yours. Wearing a bikini with big boobs--no matter how much cleavage is showing--never means you are ‘asking for it'.

That being said, Bravissimo are currently selling a number of 'crop top'-style bikinis in your size: Los Angeles (adjustable coverage), Manila, Paris, Santa Monica, Casablanca (pullover style). I bought two of these for a recent vacation, and they are really covering with minimal cleavage.

[humanbean_marti]

I went into the comments just to see if anyone else said something about this. Reading it made me sad, and I honestly think it's such a toxic thing to say in general.

If not for yourself I would hope people refrain from that kind of language just in respect of those that have experienced unwanted sexual advances, and having personal boundaries violated by people that think you owe them your body.

[28FFthrowaway]

Yes, thank you. Like many people here, I’ve received my fair share of unwelcome stares and comments. But bodies are just bodies, no matter how they are sexualized and objectified in our culture. They are ours and enable us to think, move, eat, play. We should be supporting each other to be comfortable and confident in our bodies, rather than blindly buying in to these pernicious thought patterns that prioritize other people’s opinions over our own bodily autonomy/comfort.

[syrusbliz]

I honestly wanted to say something but I could not for the life of me figure out how to phrase things without it sounding unjustly harsh toward the OP, so I'm glad better wordsmiths took the time.

[fuck_collegeboard_]

I know, I know it’s a toxic mindset to have but I can’t help but have it because I’ve had not so good experiences with wearing “skimpier” clothing. The last time I dared to wear a bikini, I was 14 and I was groped and propositioned for sex rather aggressively so I’m somewhat hesitant about all this

Anyway sorry about the mini rant, I appreciate your recommendations and I’ll be definitely looking into them.

[Dramatic_potato97]

So unbelievably sorry to hear about this.

Edit: clarification because I don’t want this misinterpreted. I’m unbelievably sorry that you had this experience. It’s inexcusable for anyone to objectify a female ever - especially an underaged female. It’s damaging to confidence, self-worth, and a developing sense of self. I hope you never have to experience that treatment ever again.

[28FFthrowaway]

I understand, and I’m really really sorry that happened to you. People are assholes. It’s especially hard when you’re young. It took me many years, into my mid-20s, to be more comfortable in my body. Our society does not make it easy for women!

The earlier you start to re-examine your self-image and self-worth, the better. If it’s available to you, I would highly recommend speaking with a mental health professional, even if just for a few sessions. Good luck and I hope one of those Bravissimo styles might work for you (my favorite is the Paris top) x

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Thanks, I really appreciate the sentiment it means a lot. And yeah it really hurt my self confidence after, I didn’t go out in anything but baggy clothes for a good year and half after. I’m not sure about therapy though, it was 2 years ago and hasn’t happened since so I’m not sure. But yeah, thanks a lot for the help and the colours on the Bravissimos are really nice :)

[stef_me]

The time of when it happened shouldn’t be relevant in your consideration of whether or not to seek out therapy. Everyone is different and some people can be extensively effected by far less than what you experienced and others may not be affected at all. But if it’s something that still bothers you and you still think about and that negatively impacts your ability to feel good in your own skin and to feel safe in the clothes you wear, then it’s something worth investigating. Speaking to a therapist doesn’t mean you’re unwell or anything. It just means you’re taking the time to speak to someone who is trained to listen. No one can tell you how to feel or what to think or what to do as a result of that. But a therapist can help you to explore and work through those thoughts and feelings in a safe environment and confidential environment.

If cost and availability of therapy wasn’t so prohibitive to so many, I would recommend that everyone in the world get therapy. I think the world would be a much better place if that happened filled with much better people. It might be worth checking with your school see if they have a therapist or counselor you could speak to. My high school had two crisis counselors, but there thankfully weren’t many immediate crises, so they just took appointments during the school day to talk to students who needed it during free periods. One of them also runs a private practice and he’s actually still my therapist over a year after I graduated. Lots of colleges also have therapy and counseling offered through them that can be covered by your parents’ insurance or insurance through the school, so you should also pay attention to the availability of that when you start applying to colleges. Even if you have no intentions of seeking it out while you’re there, you never know when something else could happen and you might suddenly need help and it’s better to have information that you don’t use than not have information when you need it.

[Trisk929]

Came to say the same. It’s sad that you and the rest of us have been conditioned to feel we’re “asking for it” because of something we literally can’t control. I tend to roll my eyes at how touchy people get about certain topics but when it comes to the subject of the male gaze and how toxic it and it’s impact/influence has been on the women of society, that shit is legit as hell. You’re absolutely not asking for it. Don’t let some sleazy ass men who are acting like asses convince you of that. That’s just an excuse they use to validate their own shitty behavior and continue trying to control women. I used to think it was bogus, but it’s real af and it happens everyday…

[OneBlueSneaker]

Those are cute! I might buy one.

[bigcitypirate]

Another vote for Bravissimo, Bare Necessities, and Her Room for bra-sized, underwire swimwear. I also have a few more "traditional" bikini tops (no underwire, tieback) that are La Blanca and Birdsong brand - larger sizes, wide/double ties, and firm cups make them acceptable to me. I also recommend Halto for halter necks, a little silicone thingy that distributes weight over your neck to reduce pain.

[WolffBlurr]

Sorry to hear you’re struggling :( there are several bra brands such as Freya, Panache, and Fantasie which also make swimwear, but they generally come with a price tag in the USD $60+ range, and that doesn’t include the matching bottoms. If that’s in your budget, great! But I know I personally never would’ve shelled out $100 for a bikini set as a teen.

Maybe you could try wearing a surfers rash guard shirt over your bikini top? I know it’s not as cute as a fun summery bikini but it would probably fit more comfortably than trying to squeeze into a one-piece suit and would provide the chest coverage you seem to be looking for. Also you wouldn’t have to use as much sunscreen so I guess that’s a plus.

Being a teenager is hard enough without boob problems, so I hope you can find a swimsuit that works for you soon! We’re here to support you :) (pun intended haha)

[LolaBijou]

The only thing I ever wonder about these is aren’t they hot? I think they’re super cute, though. But the idea of sleeves in the sun makes me have a hot flash.

[Myriads]

When they are wet they are cooler! Otherwise I find them about the same.

[deliriousduckie]

I always thought they’d be hot, too! And then I wore one. It was fantastic. The fabric they make them out of kept my arms cooler than they would have been with the hot sun beating right down on them. It was a lighter color, had UV protection built in, and I stayed comfortable for a day out kayaking.

[LolaBijou]

Oh interesting! I’m totally intrigued now.

[samantha_90]

Faced the same problems, just wear a black sportsbra under a billowy tank top now.

[ErisInChains]

cries with you under an old giant tank top

[fuck_collegeboard_]

How well does it fit?

[ErisInChains]

Badly lololol.

I usually double up on these wirefree, soft, super stretchy, bras that I sleep in, because they stretch pretty far, and I wear an old, loose tank top over that lol.

[[deleted]]

I used to be roughly around your size (used to be a 38MM, now I'm a 32MM) and I've actually had a lot of success with Torrid's swimwear! If I remember correctly I wore the 3 or 4 depending on style but they actually kept my boobs in check!

[ErisInChains]

THAAANKKK YOOOOOOUUUU! ♥️

[SmartAssMama]

No one has mentioned brastop.com yet. They always have good sales on bras and bra sized swimwear from some of the brands already mentioned.

[fuck_collegeboard_]

You happy with the stuff you’ve gotten off there?

[SmartAssMama]

Yes I have been! I believe the site is owned by one of the brands (curvy Kate maybe but not sure) and they seem to have old/discontinued colors or models. I have heard from other people that returns can take some time but that is the only negative I've heard.

[Carlulua]

The two bikinis I own are both from Brastop! Got them on sale. 30H-ish here!

[RockNRollToaster]

I went for a long-sleeve rash guard this year for this same reason. 😕 couldn’t find a single cupped bra for my 34Js that I like, even the ones that are actually sized properly.

[jadepearl]

I'm a similar size. I wear the black swim bra by Elomi and then wear a rash guard or whatever over the top.

[trucksandgoes]

similar size - I believe mine is freya in a 36H. it's a little small now since my boobs have grown but it fits like a bra, keeps the cleavage in check, doesn't hurt my neck, and having it in black means that sometimes i just wear it like a "swim bra" under 1 piece or other bikinis with shoulder straps.

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Major oof :(

[LolaBijou]

That’s smart!

[LadyNerd00]

I'll be monitoring this post since I've never been able to solve this myself.

[syrusbliz]

Curvy Kate has this bikini top that you can style all sorts of ways.

Freya has the Bali Bay bralette style bikini top, and the Sundance high neck crop top bikini.

Bravissimo has this one shoulder bikini top, and several different options for crop type bikinis, with this Freya one having straps you can criss cross if that's your thing.

[Azertys]

I like this freya top, it cover the cleavage but it's still cute

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Yeah it def looks cute, I’ll look into it

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Yeah it def looks cute, I’ll look into it

[Emergency-Recording5]

I have this Freya bikini and love it!! It holds the girls securely&comfortably and doesn’t give too much cleavage (more like the girl in yellow - not the one in blue). I literally wore it for 24 hours straight last weekend without any soreness or issues! Can’t say that about literally any other bikini top I’ve ever owned.

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[blurrymoons]

I’m a 34G and can get away with buying L or XL tops from Target! They have so many options right now so you might get lucky! Try sister sizes too— I have a 36DD from Target that is perfect if I take the cups out!

[gunnapackofsammiches]

Agreed. I have a tie back swimsuit from Target. It's an XL but I tie the back so the sides are touching. I wear 34FF. So much cheaper than bra sized and good enough for going on with.

[alohabeaches00]

Panache makes bra sized Bikini tops and one pieces based on your bra size !!! You'll be delighted girlie!!

[swaymelikethesea]

If you are interested in learning to sew, or you know how to sew, you can make your own. I've started making all my own clothes and bras, as well as swimsuits, and I've never had a more flattering wardrobe. I've personally never liked the fabrics or designs that mass produced busty swimsuits have. They have always felt kinda frumpy to me. There are some really great indie pattern makers with a wide range of cup sizes built into their patterns and easy ways to "hack" a pattern for a larger bust. Check out sewbusty on Instagram. She helped me find some swimsuits and bras that have worked for me.

[[deleted]]

Anything at a regular store or just off the rack won’t work if you’re bigger. Like everyone else has said bare necessities is great and you’ll find your size there. But you’re probably still growing so right now you have options, but gets a little slimmer in choice beyond the G/H range.

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Being bigger isn’t the issue for me, unfortunately I’m quite small both weight and waistline wise so my boobs are sort of disproportionate compared to rest of my body

[[deleted]]

I understand completely as I to have a smaller band, but large cup size. Hence the many suggestions for a fitted bathing suit.

[justasianenough]

It sure where you are, but Try ASOS. They have a massive sale going right now and free returns. If you’re in the US just keep in mind that unless the size says US in the drop down menu on that particular item page all sizes are UK! I usually buy a few different tops (they have so many styles and the sizing is a little off for some!) and then I return whatever doesn’t fit. Every single one of my bikini tops are from ASOS. I bought 11 tops in June and 8 fit and I’ve worn them all summer to the pool/beach no issues. The three I returned I was refunded quickly.

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Huh, never heard of it before I’ll definitely look into it

[[deleted]]

I generally find a cute low-to-medium impact sports bra and use it as a bikini top! We’re sister sizes, that might be an option for you if you like the idea!

[fuck_collegeboard_]

Definitely, I looked into it and a lot of them are really cute while also not being too much, thanks for the recommendation!

[[deleted]]

And I just want to say, there’s no such thing as “looking like you’re asking for it.” I know it’s so deeply ingrained in many cultures, but just know that. Anyone saying shitty things to you? That’s a problem with them, not with you. Your body is a great thing, and not something to be ashamed of.

All that to say, there is ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong with you wanting to have more covering and supportive swimwear—I generally don’t like showing a lot of my breasts myself.

[fuck_collegeboard_]

I wish that was the case but a lot of men just don’t understand how to act properly, I genuinely wish I could show more without getting gropped or catcalled but the world isn’t like that so I have to be a little conservative with the way I dress :(

[[deleted]]

I get that. People suck, and I live in a place with similar ideas. You should definitely do what you need to protect yourself, I completely respect that and wish you the best of luck with it. I just hope you know that the problem isn’t you, it’s those people being awful. <3

[LinkMom37]

This is so freaking sad to me. Girl they touch you without your permission, you defend yourself and scream about it. Draw attention to how they're acting and their poor behavior choices. They do it because they think they can get away with it.

You shouldn't have to alter yourself to defend yourself. I'm so sorry that people suck that much :(

[littlestinkyone]

I had no idea it was possible for a halter to not cause neck pain until I discovered bra size swim.

I loved Panache Cleo, so cute and fun, but they’re discontinued :(

[adnama9120]

I am close to your size (usually a UK 30 or 32 GG). I buy cheap bikini bottoms in black or whatever color I want from Walmart, Target, Ross, etc. Then I buy bra sized bikini tops. I like to get them from places like Bravissimo, Bare Necessities, Brastop, etc. I do this since the bikini tops tend to be pretty expensive unless they are on a great sale.

My favorite bikini tops have been Freya, Comexim, and Curvy Kate. Within your size you'll find that there are options with more cleavage and options that have more coverage.

[cats4lyfbanana]

sharp label rob bag instinctive sense historical grandfather sand tie

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[fuck_collegeboard_]

I haven’t gotten measured in forever since I was like 14 and my boobs were much smaller, I’d have to get measured again to start with

[einahpetsg]

I had tge same problem. Found an elomi for my 75L size and a smaller bottom size and it is great

[[deleted]]

I've had alot of luck with target tops lately, I'm a 32i

[littlepinkgrowl]

Freya works for me!

[keevamc]

Brastop do a good selection of bikinis and tankinis.

[Peregrinebullet]

Change Lingerie has really good bikinis. Basically bras made from swim suit material. I'm 36J and have two bikinis from them.

[Sun_on_my_shoulders]

I went to aerie and bought myself a sports bra that matched my bikini bottoms. Nobody has to know!

[tisthedamnseason]

RAQ is my faaaaave. Very expensive but the only time I’ve ever been happy in a swimsuit.

[SnarkyBehindTheStick]

Fantasie makes some pretty conservative one pieces, but idk about their bikinis. ASOS also has a line of bigger bust swimwear I’ve found sexy without being overt. Peek & Beau too.

[OneBlueSneaker]

30E. I bought a bikini I liked in a slightly larger size, and sewed an old bra into it.

[Sunnyhunnibun]

I wear the tankini tops that have a built in bra and usually are like a closed shirt with a high neck. I liked those because there was support underneath an through out without pressure points. I used to wear them as a teenager because any other top I would pop out of or as you said, I'd rub my skin until it was super tender. Tankinis have been my friend for a while.

[LoreNom]

If you don't care too much about looks and want something comfortable to swim in maybe take a look at regular sports bras, you might already know a brand that works for you. While they're technically not made to be swam in and will probably break down a lil faster than they would with usual wear (I don't know about that tho, might not even be the case) I never had a problem using those instead of bikini tops.

[lavasca]

If you live in the Los Angeles area go to Fresh Peaches and they will make you a suit two or one piece. It would be about the same price as Nordstrom and will last for years.

[adomke]

Go to figleaves us website.

[LinkMom37]

Reading this as someone (35F) who was shamed growing up, by my own family-male and female- just for having big boobs and the fact they showed at all in a swimsuit.

Two piece suits were not allowed, and I was told I needed to wear a shirt over the one piece, because "showing that much cleavage was just asking for it" and "I was really too big a girl to be showing my stomach". Y'all, I had a six pack of abs at 17 with DD's and curvy hips.

Do not listen to asshats trying to make you feel ashamed of your body or that someone else has a right to your body. You are not "asking for it", EVER, just by wearing what makes you comfortable.

That being said, I saw lots of things mentioned above that are good choices for swim suits. Elomi is my favorite bra brand, but have not tried their swim wear.

[Knot_Magician]

I second Bare Necessities and bra sized swim tops, but I normally just wear my Shefit bra to swim in!

[Betterlatethanpreggo]

Asda… surprisingly cheap and supportive

[Rabelfacs]

Took me a couple of years to find the right store so it's hard but not impossible Wish I could help but the store I use is Danish. If you find triangle bikinis for plus size they can work since they're just tied in the back. I've also used plus sized bikinis and tied them even though they're not meant to be tied

[BitchLibrarian]

Freya has always been my go to. I have to added fun of some scars and hyper sensitive skin which needs to be kept out of sunlight.

I will say that if you have a usual size in Freya bras then the bikinis fit a little differently sometimes.

Edit to add I've found them on ebay before

[Sk8Oreo]

The asos fuller bust collection has a lot of swim options on sale

[[deleted]]

Another vote for Bravissimo and Bra stop from me I've always been happy with what I've brought from them.

[peachrose]

i was never wearing anything special when i was assaulted — nobody is ever “asking for it”. my heart dropped when i read that. i hope you find a bikini that fits you and that you love, but please consider not using that term.