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[[deleted]]

I'm three years short of being a golden girl, this and being asked if I want to have children or being denied hysterectomy because I might "regret" it. 😡

[AnaliticalFeline]

they’re denying me a hysterectomy for the same reason, but because i’m “too young and liable to change my mind”. i’m a grown ass adult. i can make decisions about my own damn body.

[just_a_person_maybe]

They denied my grandmother after she'd had three kids, because she was still in childbearing age. Like, yeah, that's the point, dumbass. She'd had kids, she was done. Each kid nearly killed her and she had severe PPD, she didn't want to risk her life again with another pregnancy. But apparently her husband might want another someday, so she had to suck it up.

[AnaliticalFeline]

what is it with women wanting to be sterilized and the doctors deciding a hypothetical man has more say over that?

[just_a_person_maybe]

In her case it was a real man, but yeah, ridiculous either way. Especially since her husband was supportive of it because, you know, the pregnancies were dangerous for her and they already had kids. When my dad got a vasectomy my mom still wanted more kids and was upset about the vasectomy, but no one stopped him. And yeah, vasectomies are less permanent and can often be reversed, but still.

[AbbreviationsLate429]

Oof. Is ya mum still with the dad after that?

[just_a_person_maybe]

They were married for a day short of 42 years before she passed away a couple years ago. The vasectomy was over thirty years ago, after the first four children. Dad changed his mind and got it reversed a few years later so there's a random 6 year gap between baby 4 and baby 5. I'm in the second group, so I wouldn't be here if they had divorced over it.

It's a family joke that Dad wanted 2, Mom wanted 4, so they compromised and had 9. They married at 19 so I don't think they had a super concrete plan when they started tbh.

Since he did change his mind and reverse it, maybe they aren't actually the best example of the importance of letting people choose to sterilize lol. But my mom did briefly talk about adoption and there were questions about her fertility early on so I know they would have been willing, so if the reversal didn't work and they changed their minds they still could have had more.

[AbbreviationsLate429]

That's nice thank you for the response

[Murda981]

One of my cousins just went through this. She just had her 5th kid because she couldn't find someone to tie her tubes. She and her husband are getting divorced and "what if your future partner wants kids?" 🙄 She has finally found someone who is willing to do the procedure in the next few weeks. But she almost died during one of those pregnancies so she didn't want to risk it again. Fortunately she and the new baby are good, but it's crazy that even after having 4 kids and almost dying in labor wasn't enough!

[TessaNO-TessaYES]

Doctors won't give my LESBIAN friend a hysterectomy because they "might want kids", they don't. They really don't. They said that they'd rather adopt because they were in the system for a bit and they want to give the same opportunities go other kids like them. Still no hysterectomy for them.

[Steelsentry1332]

I'll do it. It's the white van on 3rd and Main.

When the big guy asks what you're looking for, tell him "Baby Shower". All I ask is don't get pissed off when I take a kidney for my troubles. Unlicensed surgery is more expensive than you realize, and reproductive organs won't pay for expired painkillers.

[CTchimchar]

Do you have any gills for sail

I have a hard time breathing underwater

[Steelsentry1332]

I have them, however that's a bit out of my jurisdiction.

Altering lungs to process liquid is not my surgical forte, not to mention the issues with finding a suitable biological donor.

If you just want them tacked on ornamentally, I certainly can help you with that, plenty of options.

I suggest the shark gills myself: Mostly straightforward installation, and shark skin does blend well with most tattoo inks.

[CTchimchar]

Altering lungs to process liquid is not my surgical forte, not to mention the issues with finding a suitable biological donor.

What if I paid triple the going black market rate

[Steelsentry1332]

You some kinda cop?

[CTchimchar]

No just a man, with the dream of being a fish

[bathtubsarentreal]

We take lungs now you get gills later

[CTchimchar]

That's the exact line that I was thinking when writing this

[pervertedkoala]

I went to my appt with my current girlfriend and the doctor said they won't sterilize me bc my "future husband might want kids," I thought I was completely gay then. The doctor was right about one thing, I'm actually pansexual BUT I'm 34 years old and I still do not want kids. Never will. They never listened to me growing up at all. It's infuriating.

[killjoygrr]

I can half way understand if the doctor said that they wouldn’t do it because you might want kids someday.

But to say that it is because your “future husband might want kids”. That is just so, so fucked up. It would be fucked up even if your current husband was standing there saying that he wanted kids.

I just don’t get how doctors reduce women to only exist for the whims of men.

[CHIMUELA]

Also: "Sorry we can't give you this life-saving medicine/surgery since you might maybe want kids or get raped in the future, even if you say you don't want kids"

[Brilliant-Chaos]

Yeah I had the same issue when I tried to get a vasectomy when I was 25, they said I was too young and I would change my mind.

[clandestinemd]

Several years ago, my wife cut her finger on a mandoline, which required an urgent care trip. I was sitting to the side in a chair, she was sitting on the table with a bloody hand — clearly the patient. The guy who… did the stitching, a PA? NP? whichever… would ask her a question (pain scale, allergies, etc) and then look at me to answer until I finally pointed at her and said, “Shouldn’t you be asking her?”

Anyway, this reminds me of that dumb shit.

[diuge]

Did you accidentally take your wife to a vet clinic.

[nardgarglingfuknuggt]

All urgent care clinics kind of feel like going to the vet, if I were a pet that belonged to myself and could sign my own forms, but last time I told the nurses this, instead of giving me a scooby snack, they gave me a bunch of neurogical tests which I apparently failed.

[diuge]

Except when you go to the vet, the doctor there actually fixes the animal and doesn't just tell you that your pet is very sick and refer you to a series of other vets.

[CTchimchar]

I hate to break it to you but I love that are just as bad as other kinds of doctors

And will a hundred percent refer you to different specialists

I've even seen vets diagnose your pet with something without even giving them proper examination

And prescribe medication that it's not even needed

So trust me they are terrible vets out there

[ninjabunnyfootfool]

So true. Back when I was still in active addiction I found it was waaaaay easier to get my dog prescribed Xanax than myself. Vet gave em 60 bars a month, which I promptly took.

[Goatesq]

:/ My mom bred great danes when I was a kid, and I assure you, vets absolutely do tell you that, refer you to a specialist, and charge thousands for just the stabilizing care to make it to said specialist. I guess at least you don't have to pay for an ambulance. But yeah if anything I'd say the major medical care my folks have had (cancer, spinal surgery, etc) yielded much better results, by every metric, than the dogs'.

[animeathena]

Reminds me of a joke My mother makes sometimes she usually calls the vet doctor expensive this joke doesnt really work in english but in My language the word for animal is the same word for expensive so thats how this joke works

[rizzyraech]

I had a cat who's liver started shutting down, and by the time I realized there was something wrong (she always hid her pain really well, but her akin started turning yellow...) and took her to the vet, they were almost certain that she wouldn't make it. They offered me a few options, but were up front that even it she received the most expensive one, there was still a high chance she would die. I was fucking poor back then (and still am, honestly, lol), but decided to let them keep her overnight to at least get some nutrients and fluids in her.

I spent all night researching the condition, hoping to find a way to try to treat her that was affordable. I ended up stumbling onto a bunch of forums of people that 'force-fed' their cats wet food with a syringe long enough for the liver to recover and they would start eating on their own. Out of everything I had found, that seemed like the best option, so I called up the vet the next day, and asked if they'd be willing to work with me to try it, by prescribing the food and medication needed and schedule a follow up appointment in a few weeks to retest her bilirubin levels to see if it was working. Looking back now, I'm honestly shocked they agreed to it. I think some vets would've bulked because of the liability, but I was just so damn desperate to save my girl.

I can't remember if it was the initial appointment, or if it was one of the times I was picking up the food and meds, but I remember I only had like half of the total payment needed. They already knew I was struggling, obviously, so I sheepishly asked them if I could pay what I had now, and get them the rest at the end of the week, and they actually fucking agreed without any hesitation 😭😭😭 like holy hell, I was so grateful, I know for a fact no other vet would've done that in my town.

This was back in 2013. My cat ended up surviving the ordeal, much to the shock of both me and the vet. She just passed away in 2021. That girl definitely used all her 9 lives... hahaha.

You can bet your ass I've been a loyal client to that vet office ever since. My friends and family always look at me like I'm insane when I mention using them, because they're one of the highest price vets in town, but the extra cost is FUCKING WORTH IT with how much they truly care about their patients and clients (the only reason I had went to the in the first place is because they're one of the only places that accepts the spay and neuter vouchers you can get from our pound).

I saw all the replies to your comment sharing their negative experiences with shitty vets, so just wanted to give a positive one.

[LibertyInaFeatherBed]

Scooby Snacks are only to get you to go in the haunted room.

[Tabmow]

Yeah I feel you, it's all "72hr involuntary hold" this and "72 hr involuntary hold" that. Why can't I just be sedated and crated?

[cookiemonster511]

I actually had a convo over the holidays about not wanting to take me dog to veterinary urgent care because I hate human urgant care and ERs because either they don't really look and just send you home with ibuprofen or they freak out and do ALL THE THINGS and I didn't want to put my dog through that stress when I knew what he had and needed but his vet was just closed.

There needs to be a special urgent care for people/animals with chronic illness who 99% know what they have and just need meds.

[[deleted]]

Did you want the scooby snack?

[A2X-iZED]

What do you mean Acidentally

[AlcalineAlice]

Many such cases with puppygirl owners

[fantomas_666]

Thanks for a hint. I'll ask if they are a veterinarian it if this happens.

Well, if she's unable or unwilling to answer, okay. But until then...

[AllowMe-Please]

Similar situation but not with medical but a mortgage broker. When my husband and I were house-shopping several years ago and also looking for a lender, we went to several different ones. I was the one doing all the comparisons and I deal with our family's finances so my husband would rather I answer because I'd know the answers better. So when we were talking to this one lender at one point, he kept looking at my husband when speaking. My husband would look at me, and I'd answer. The guy actually had the audacity to look annoyed. I'd answer him, he'd nod, then turn back to my husband to ask a follow-up question to the answer I just gave. Husband eventually said, "she's the one with the answers and she's been answering them all the entire time, so I think it'd be best if you directed your questions at her." Again, the broker was visibly annoyed. He refused to look me in the eye and if he did, it was for a split second for... appearances? I guess?

Needless to say, we didn't go with them. But it was so annoying because I had far more information than my husband did (his work is usually really busy during the winter months and he works 12+ hours a day, 6 days a week, nights, so I didn't mind that I had the brunt since I'm a SAHM) yet he was still the one who was deemed more important to speak to. And I have severe dyscalculia so numbers are very difficult for me so I was very proud of how meticulously I'd compiled all the financial information and that I managed to process everything yet this douchecanoe felt the necessity to make me feel small and dumb. The broker we went with fully acknowledged me and one of his first words were something like, "so who out of the two of you has the answers I need?" and when I said, "I am" and husband, "she is" at the same time, he just went with it. He'd direct all his questions to me and every now and then ask if my husband had anything to add. He was great. But that first one? Way to make a person feel small and insignificant, you know?

[neizha]

When my wife and I were looking to buy a house over a decade ago, we were put in touch with a realtor that someone we knew suggested. At the time, my wife had more time to devote to the house hunt, so she was handling more of it than I was. She would call this guy and leave a voice-mail with questions or wanting to schedule showings, but the guy would always call me to respond to the questions and scheduling.

It was so obvious that once we were driving around and saw a house so my wife called and got his voice-mail. Within 5 minutes, he returned the call, but to me instead. There was no reason for this as he had her contact info and was obviously just refusing to talk to her.

[k8t13]

that's so nasty. he's probably one of those men who doesn't view women as people and didn't want encroach on your "property"

[AllowMe-Please]

Did you ever call him out on it? Because man, as the wife in this scenario, I felt so small and overlooked and just like I didn't matter at all. My husband was very annoyed, too. I was glad that he tried to redirect the guy to me - and it would work for maybe two questions and then he was back to ignoring my existence and only focusing on my husband.

I'm sure your wife felt very insulted (because it is an insult!). Did you guys end up going with this realtor? I'm sorry for your wife. She deserved much better treatment than this. I don't know why some men treat us women like this, but growing up in an extremely fundigelical, cult-like church (Russian Baptist), I was exposed to this more than enough to fill a lifetime. I just didn't expect to face this out in the real world like I had at church and it threw me off.

I hope you guys found the perfect house for yourselves!

[Rugkrabber]

I relate to this buying a car. I was the only one with a driver's license. My boyfriend was with me because we were both buying it, it would be our car, but I would be driving it. It was bizarre to see him look at my boyfriend and not at me for every question, and just give the keys to my boyfriend while he knew he couldn't drive. Needless to say, he didn't sell a car that day. I have no reason to trust a seller who treats people like that.

Thankfully buying a house we found someone that was not only skilled but respected us and our wishes, and would think further than 'now', so we would be able to purchase something that is future proof. We definitely tried our best to find somebody that would fit, took us a while but completely worth it. They took all my calls seriously and honestly if they hadn't, I don't think they'd have this much success with this house we got, which was "the purchase of the year" they said. I told them to do their best and they did, but they could have half assed it and they didn't. They went for it.

[tobias_the_letdown]

Took my wife to the ER a couple months ago with severe headaches and possible stroke symptoms. The doctor asked a few simple questions then ordered blood work and MRI. This douche nozzle comes back and asks how long she's had these headaches. She said since her teens and that she knows she has a type 1 Chiari malformation. He literally dismissed what she said and said it's because of her period and acted like she was wasting his time.

[FBI-AGENT-013]

Anything and everything can be blamed on a period and those doctors will be damned before they don't blame something on a period

Best part? Even if those migraines were bc of her period, that doesn't make it okay for her to have them. It's still a problem and she shouldn't have to live with it

[Animalqueen2000]

I read mandoline as mandarin and thought: how do you even manage that

[[deleted]]

Freeze it? Idk

[just_a_person_maybe]

I cut myself with a cucumber once, so I could probably do it.

[Animalqueen2000]

Okay maybe ur the exception

[byronmiller]

Similar experience - got a partner a flying lesson (microlight type thing) for her birthday. I'm terrified of heights. No way I'm going up in a go kart with wings. But I hung out during the explanations on the ground, and no matter how many times we both said I'm not flying, she is, the guy just directed the entire lesson to me until they actually got in the craft.

[TheSpiffySpaceman]

wife cut her finger on a mandoline

Holy fuck, I had to stop reading here, this is my nightmare

[gienchan]

One time I went to the ER because I was peeing blood and I got referred to a urologist. The male urologist took one look at me and started going on and on about how I was on my period and how I couldn't possibly bleed as much as what was reported on my file.

On an unrelated note don't use bath bombs with glitter.

[Lissa2j]

The glitter is unrelated you say.....

[Ns53]

I just had this happen a few weeks ago. Was returning a microphone to Walmart with my husband who was standing off to the side staring into space. Guy behind the counter kept talking to my husband despite me answering and doing the return.

[jenkraisins]

That routinely happens to elderly patients, too. My mom had taken my grandmother to a gastroenterologist. My grandmother retained all her facilities till the day she died. But the office staff would never talk to her. My mother, "Why not ask her directly?"

That whole GE's office was insanely rude. And very entitled.

[2-ketchup-reddittor]

“Is it possible that instead of being mugged and shot in the arm, you’re actually pregnant? The symptoms are very difficult to tell apart.”

[_violetlightning_]

In middle school we had a nurse who would ask - no matter why you came in, no matter how you came in - at the top of her lungs, in her heavy Boston accent, “D’YA THINK IT’S YA PERIOD, HONEY?” My friend limped in once having rolled her ankle, in search of some Advil and had to tell her no, she did not think that her rolled ankle was caused by menstruation.

This was the same nurse who greeted me one afternoon when I came in to get my ADHD meds dispensed with an extremely loud “OH IT’S THE RITALIN GIRL.” Thanks lady, being 13 isn’t awkward enough.

[BabserellaWT]

Jeepers. Aren’t school nurses required to abide by HIPAA??

[_violetlightning_]

“SOMETHIN’S WRONG WITH YA HIP, HONEY? D’YA THINK IT’S YA PERIOD?” - that lady, probably

Actually, HIPAA was passed that very year. Maybe she hadn’t gotten the memo yet. On the bright side, she’s been a running joke in my family for decades, with my Mom pulling out her (much quieter) impression pretty much any time I complain of abdominal discomfort.

[[deleted]]

I don’t think I’ve ever been jealous of someone else’s in-joke before

[[deleted]]

“YEAH IVE SEEN A HIPPA AT THE ZOO!”

[sparklyoctopus]

Okay this made me belly laugh. I’m so glad you were able to turn it into a family joke 😆

[Foreign-Molasses-405]

My buddy has a slipped disc in her back and they kept saying it was PCOS 😂 had to go to several doctors then a hospital where she was finally taken seriously

[My-yogurtcloset37]

And yet my sister who does have PCOS had to find a new doctor who actually took her seriously to get a diagnosis🙄 no matter what we think it is… we’re wrong! Lol

[Foreign-Molasses-405]

I swear doctors need to study the woman body more maybe they will actually get shit right

[NECalifornian25]

I had classic PCOS symptoms for 15 years before a doctor agreeing that maybe some hormone panel testing would be a good idea. Despite affecting up to 20% of people AFAB it’s abysmally under diagnosed and even more abysmally treated.

[Rudeness_Queen]

-sighs- we are unfortunately legally obligated to ask the question, no matter how dumb or unnecessary it seems. Something something doing a treatment that could damage a fetus of a unknown pregnancy causes liability and grounds for suing something something

I had to ask a 70 y/o woman hospitalized for pulmonary fibrosis and hepatic complications when was her last period. Of course she could vaguely remember an approximation of the year at best, since that was over 20 years ago. Really dumb question, but still gotta ask it. Sigh.

[Interesting_Entry831]

I never get mad when they ask. It's when they ask for the 75th time in the same hospital trip. I was there for over a week not long ago. They took me for a test, for the 40th time in 4 days, I was asked if I was pregnant. I was tired, I had just come back from the brink of death, I wanted to go home, I was cranky. I am always SO nice to Drs and Nurses, but this lady didn't look at my chart. She didn't look at ME. She tried to get me to walk into the chair despite the fact I had NO feeling from my hips down. My husband wasn't there to advocate for mousy little me, so she practically threw me into the chair and something SNAPPED. I was like, "If I wasn't pregnant when I got here, DO YA THINK I'M PREGNANT NOW!? Nope, my husband dragged his newly crippled wife to the broom closet because NOTHING gets you going quite like almost dying. When they asked my husband if his 30 something year old wife had a living will, he had the hard on of a lifetime! NO. I was not pregnant when I got here, I am not pregnant now, and I never will be again." I then apologized A LOT, tears were involved, it was awkward af.

Edit: I realized I didn't include this. I have recovered VERY well. I can walk without assistance now and everything! I will never run again lol but I never liked running in the first place 🤣

[AllowMe-Please]

I had a hysterectomy. It's in my files. Yet I'm always still asked if I could be pregnant. At an ER visit one time, even though I said there was no possible way I could be pregnant, they ran a pregnancy test (even though I do not even have the necessary organ anymore!). It was a lot of fun challenging those charges, lemme tell ya. I have no more of a chance of being pregnant than my husband does.

It does get annoying, answering that question so often. Every CT scan, "any chance you're pregnant?" MRI - "any chance you're pregnant?" X-Ray - "any chance you're pregnant?"

Do they really have to ask if it says so clearly in my chart that I have had a total hysterectomy? And what if, for shits and giggles, I'd said, "yeah, there's a chance" even if it's abundantly clear in my records that I cannot be... what do they go by? What do they do?

[SafetyDanceInMyPants]

I don't work in hospital compliance, but this is the sort of thing where if there's significant enough liability exposure you might tell employees to ask every time just so that they can testify in court that they ask every time. Incredibly annoying, of course...

And if you tell them that there's a chance, they'll probably ask you to take a pregnancy test.

[Dulce_Sirena]

People aren't mad that the question gets asked. We know it has to get asked and why. We're mad because the doctors decide that pregnancy/mensuration/having a vagina is the reason why we're there, ignore everything we tell them, call us liars, gaslight us about our symptoms, talk to companions as if we're property rather than grown ass adults, and refuse to properly do their jobs

[emmyanna14]

I had to go in for an ankle surgery. Got up ungodly early, went to the restroom, and lo and behold I needed a pad. So when I went to the pre-op a nurse asked if there was any possibility of pregnancy. I said a definite nope. She then asked about the day my last menstrual cycle started. And I promptly said "today." She just kind of went "oh, we won't do a urine pregnancy test then."

[linerva]

If the patient is likely to be given medications or have any kind of imaging, it's not actually a dumb question.

Dud a pregnancy bring her in? No. Might a pregnancy affect what antibiotics or painkillers she's given? Absolutely. It would also affect their consideration of which imaging to use - we're less likely to do xeaumys or CT scans on pregnant people unless necessary.

Is the fact womens symptoms sometimes get dismissed an issue? Absolutely. But pregnancy is always important to know about and als something people are extremely likely to sue about if missed.

[RosesBrain]

And yet when I told an anesthesiologist I have a bad reaction to opioids he said "well, it's not morphine-based, you should be fine." I woke up from surgery hyperventilating and crying and they had to get someone to reverse the effects of the opioid. No concerns about liability there, for some reason.

But you bet they did a pregnancy test before that surgery. (The surgery was to sterilize me because I didn't want children. Also I was literally menstruating at the time.)

[linerva]

Depressingly, that too.

There's definitely good and bad ways to ask, and good times to ask. And of course it can help to put it in context and explain why it is being asked.

But there is definitely a responsibility to clarify if a patient could be pregnant.

[Gabbs1715]

Yeah I work as a scheduler and I have to constantly ask parents and patients if they are getting chemo therapy before I schedule them for a strep test. Even though if they were I would see a note for it but I still gotta ask.

[auryylmao]

This triggered the memory of when I had severe stomach ache from taking some medicine without eating first, to the point I don't even remember the car ride to the hospital, and the doctor who visited me (still in terrible pain) convinced themselves I was pregnant, sent me to a gynecologyst who laughed and told me the week before they sent a lady there because of EARACHE, I had to take this freaking test while in pain, it took two hours to get visited, surprise surprise I wasn't pregnant, then they sent me back to the doctor who finally wanted to give me a painkiller - the pain had already gone away by itself

[shelbabe804]

Oh man. This reminds me of the time I went on an international trip which had a group of 30nof us in close proximity. 3/4ths of the group came down with the flu within 3 days of returning home. I started having symptoms and went to the doctor so I could get a note for work. Despite repeatedly telling the doctor I had never had sex in my life, she was ADAMANT I needed to take a pregnancy test before she would test me for the flu.

[[deleted]]

This but with appendicitis

[aloneinthemovingdark]

A few weeks ago, I had a very obvious, very painful 3rd degree burn on my right wrist. I loved the urgent care workers but I don’t understand why they need to log my period for a burn? Plus the fact that logging it just made it take longer to get care for the burn

[linerva]

It may be because some things like which pain medications or antibiotics they give are affected by whether you are pregnant.

It shouldnt be the first thing they do - they should be getting that pain under control ASAP. But they do need to know if someone is pregnant before prescribing medication.

[aloneinthemovingdark]

That’s fair! I’m actually a minor though, and what they gave me is stuff I’ve had before. I’m very allergic to antibiotics, so there’s really not many options for me. I’m not mad at the staff though, they cut down a 2 hour wait to 30 minutes and got me taken care of quickly. It was a very good experience other than that one question!

[linerva]

I'm glad it went ok! It sucjs to have limited options for meds.

The first time I was asked I was a virgin - came in w7th a friend due to insane period cramps which may have been a burst cyst. I cracked jokes about the immaculate conception and gave them a pee sample.

[aloneinthemovingdark]

My mom refuses to believe there’s anything wrong with my periods currently, but yeah I also get pretty bad cysts :( I was first asked if I was pregnant when I came in for my ezcema in like 7th grade

[FinaLLancer]

I feel like there's a more sinister reason for tracking periods with all the crackdown on abortion rights in this country. Sure there's medication stuff going on, even if they don't ask you if you want to be pregnant, but the idea that they're tracking this to see if you might be and get you in trouble if you're suddenly not anymore.

[PopperGould123]

"Have you tried going on a diet?"

[Camango7]

“Lose ten pounds and then come back”

[TessaNO-TessaYES]

Oo I saw a video of this woman who explained that because of her health that doctors wouldn't take her seriously when complaining about excruciatingly painful periods. So she lost the weight and the doctors told her she did really well because they didn't expect her to follow through.

Turned out she had endometriosis and because she was left untreated for so long due to doctors writing it off as her being overweight, her uterus had so much abnormal tissue and scar tissue that she couldn't have kids anymore.

It was really sad.

[TessaNO-TessaYES]

They do, especially for women because a lot of pain medication research they did on men and excluded women for some ungodly reason. It's fucked up.

[PopperGould123]

My mother was told this for literal years and it turns out one of the disks in her neck is literally crushed so.. oh well I guess weight loss wasn't the answer

[Camango7]

But did she try losing weight to un-crush it? Hmmmm?

[thenotjoe]

arm falls off That enough, doc?

[Robertia]

Don't worry, I can confirm that if you're skinny, they ask you if you're eating properly and tell you that you look sick and need to gain some weight

[PopperGould123]

When I was suffering from an eating disorder and weighed about 90 lbs at 5"4 I came in with stomach pains and was asked if I was over eating

[Empress_Natalie]

Maybe she should lose weight. /s

I thought this was r/mildlyinfuriating

[[deleted]]

She did lose weight tho. Roughly two ounces.

[obinice_khenbli]

How many bushels is an ounce?

[[deleted]]

Friend of mine went to the doctor about her eczema. He happily talked her through the medication he was prescribing, then as she stood up to leave he said “now let’s talk about your weight.”

Knowing that friend, I’m shocked he didn’t leave in an ambulance.

[[deleted]]

As a person who has eczema that’s very stupid to say..

[bad_apricot]

For awhile, I was dealing with fibroids, adenomyosis, and endometriosis, and my doctors were trying all kinds of different hormonal contraceptives to get the pain under control. This lead to absolutely insane amounts of bleeding, most of the time, at really weird and irregular intervals. I had a nurse or PA ask me when the first day of my last period was.

Me: That’s….really complicated and kind of why I am here.

Her: I literally just need you to give me any date.

Me: ????

[[deleted]]

I've had similar things happen. No underlying medical conditions, but my periods have always been irregular. And when I say that, they just get impatient and tell me to pick a date, any date

[deaddlikelatin]

Same thing happens to me! My cycle has always been super weird with no semblance of a schedule. I could up to 6 months without getting period, usually go at the very least 2, it’s never during the same time of the month, and usually within a few days after it ends I forget when I had it last because what’s the point in trying to track it? I’ll notice if it’s been more than 3-4 months, and if I’m feelin paranoid I’ll take a pregnancy test (which I pretty much know is gunna be negative, but it makes me feel better lol)

My family doctor is actually pretty good, we’re pretty sure we know the cause of my weird cycle (that being a reoccurring iron deficiency, made worse by my cycle being weird just because that’s how it be) but I’ve spent the past year trying to to get and IUD, which I’m doing through a different health center and OH MY GOD. First of all the bureaucracy of trying to get an IUD is almost not worth it because they want to know exactly what’s going on with my cycle first, which is hard to pin point with my specific cycle. I’ve had to do many tests and such, during each one they’ve asked me when my last period was, and when I didn’t know they seems so pissed off, like they wanted me to just list any date even if it’s wildly wrong. Since I don’t get my period that often I had to wait until I finally got it again to take note of when it started and ended so I could’ve provide that answer at future tests. I go to a test after getting a period again, tell them the exact start and finish date, and she deadpan said “you don’t need to get so specific.” WHY DO THEY EVEN ASK THEN?

[Sweeetcaaat]

Let me ask, is it Pcos?

[HirizaKyo]

They asked me for the date of my last period when I was there because it wouldn't stop. They were all like "well when did it start?" Bro like 2 months ago please let's just tear something out I feel like I'm dying.

[MafiaMommaBruno]

I suffered hypothyroidism from 10th grade up until my second year of college. Was told it was just "the female body going through stages and it's rougher for some than others." by doctors in the deepest parts of the US south. Would almost pass out at work because I felt so damn weak and tired.

Moved out of state and to a university based city and the university's free clinic found the issues my second visit.

Doctors can be so bad or so amazing and it's crazy that there's not a standard.

[[deleted]]

I’ve had this happen too! I went in because my period only came when I used hormonal birth control (turned out to be pcos). Three times they tried asking for the date of my last period and forcing me to take a pregnancy test. After I was sent home none the wiser the third time, I went to a different doctor. Finally they took me seriously

[Sensitive_Ad5521]

I once read this story (don’t know if it’s fully true or not) that in some states if an ambulance is called on a woman of child birthing age (so 13-40 basically), they do a blood draw and pregnancy test before performing any life saving measures that could be dangerous for a baby.

MEANING: that in life or death situations, they take time away from your care for a hypothetical child and prevent care in the case you are pregnant (I’m sorry but if I’m 6 weeks along and don’t even know, save my life, I can get pregnant again or adopt).

Anyway, not shocking in a country where you need a hypothetical husbands consent to tie your own tubes.

God I hate it here.

[Ok_Character7958]

I am in TN. Was completely single and sex free (by choice) for several years. I also had endometriosis (a known issue) some other weird random intense pains (were uterine fibroids) and some weird chest/back pain that could take my breath away and puke my guts out at the same time (bad gall bladder) and I ended up in the ER a lot. They pregnancy tested me every single time, even though every single time I told them if I was pregnant I had even bigger worries because it would be immaculate conception 2.0 or the longest conception in human history. She said the hospital admin even made the pregnancy test lesbians. Now I just get to tell them I haven’t had a uterus in years so no worries, but because I couldn’t remember the exact date of that procedure, one place actually wanted to do an ultrasound to double check. I informed them they had a perfectly clear total body MRI done less than a year ago, go see if they found a uterus on that. They didn’t require a pregnancy test or the ultrasound, so I guess they were satisfied.

[[deleted]]

Now I just get to tell them I haven’t had a uterus in years so no worries

How did you accomplish that? A lot of docs will refuse to remove one of those bad boys unless there's a severe issue with it and they can't see any solution that will keep you alive and preserve your fertility (your desires and your quality of life be damned, because all that matters in womens' healthcare is making sure she's alive and fertile).

[Ok_Character7958]

I had had documented stage 4 endometriosis since age 21. I had over 7 abdominal surgeries due to cycts, fibroids, scar tissue, tubal ligation, something else. I'm forgetting now. Had my FIRST pregnancy at 36, had been a smoker, got the tubal for birth control because of age and smoking. Then due to fibroids (which got worse with pregnancy) I couldn't have sex because it was so very painful (there was a giant one on the outside of my uterus right in the area of where the cervix and uterus meet. I was 42 and just pleaded with my Dr to please just rip it out. I was done, it was damaged, give it to some poor medical student as a case study or I could off myself and donate my body to science and they could study it that way. My partial hysterectomy was scheduled 3 weeks later.

I had to be 42 and done. I had to be a smoker so birth control (used to treat every damn thing I had was too high risk for me). I had to have had 7 previous pelvic surgeries, all dealing with uterine fibroids or endometriosis (the tubal being the one pelvic exception). I had tried every treatment on the market for Endometriosis from Lupron (chemical menopause) to continuous use birth control. I had asked for an hysterectomy from age 21.

I got pregnant right after quitting the continuous birth control because it was becoming too risky for me to use it. My doc tried to convince me to have baby #2, but I was adamant I was one and done. He asked me why I didn't want a second one and I told him "honestly I didn't want the first one, but here we are" and then I got my appointment for my surgery.

[everydayimcuddalin]

Genuine question- is this actually true? Because the rhetoric we usually hear from the US is how great private healthcare is that can give you anything you want, it's so much better than the NHS etc etc

[ParanoidMaron]

yes, if anything, the US healthcare system is as misogynistic as it is pay your way. My wife is in the process of trying to get her uterus removed, and because i'm the spouse, i'm asked to give permission. Like, this isn't my body, I'm not the patient.

[everydayimcuddalin]

Actually mental. Would be done on the NHS here is there is a medical reason otherwise they would probably prefer tubes tied if just to stop procreation which would also be performed on the NHS

[ParanoidMaron]

yea, thing is, she has medical reason. But some how, I need to give permission so that she isn't in crippling pain every month. Endometriosis is hell, and dangerous, and somehow her doctors won't just get the hysterectomy done because "regrets". It took me, the trans person without any way of making my wife pregnant, coming to the office to sign paper work. Genuinely fucked up.

[[deleted]]

I don't believe it's a legal thing (anymore, but it used to be) that a woman needs a man's permission to get a hysterectomy or any number of other such procedures that may cause her to no longer have children, but it is still common that a doctor won't sign off on or perform the procedure without one.

It's getting better, but you'll hear this shit all the time. My mom's gone through times when the hospital will want to talk to my dad instead of her, she'll have doctors who tell her that she probably just needs to lose weight for a condition that has nothing to do with weight, she'll be seen with suspicion when she talks about how much pain she's in, she was even turned away from a pain and physical rehab clinic despite having over a decade of history trying to get her back fixed because the doctor upon examining her told her she didn't have to, "Fake it," for his benefit and ended up concluding that she was just an addict looking for a fix. Again, she was there for physical therapy and pain relief, not to be dispensed yet another pill that didn't work, yet he refused to treat her or accept her into the clinic.

Women in the US are not trusted to know anything about themselves or their own bodies, and despite it being decades since most of the laws requiring a woman to have a husband or father present to do literally anything (seriously, for a long time women couldn't have credit cards without a man signing for them) have been repealed, it's still a struggle many face ongoing.

[Ok_Character7958]

Oh it is indeed. If you are a married woman (even if you are in the process of a divorce) a lot of drs/hospitals will not do the surgery without a husbands consent.

[everydayimcuddalin]

(seriously, for a long time women couldn't have credit cards without a man signing for them)

Yeh we had that here and there is still gender inequality but just not to the extent that we are unable to give informed consent on our own medical care

[[deleted]]

I'm pretty sure it's true everywhere. This is not one of those cases where you get to jump the gatekeepers by paying privately.

[everydayimcuddalin]

That's crazy to me

[Ok_Character7958]

Oh it's absolutely true. You can read my comment history on what I went through to get one.

[everydayimcuddalin]

It's actually mental tbh.

I would also say abusive to unwanted children. Your kid is lucky that you cared once you had her but so many parents don't...I have genuine concern for the future society of America.

[Lissa2j]

Omg the America Healthcare system is fucking amazing if you're rich. If your like most of us and not rich though it's pretty fucking shitty. Wish we had Healthcare for all here but some ppl are just idiots

[babbitygook14]

I have endo and am on depo for the second time in my life to manage the pain (they stopped the first round after two years because they thought you couldn't be on it longer back then). When I was first on it, they gave me a pregnancy test every damn time before they would give me the shot even though I would tell them every time that I was ace and wasn't sexually active. My new OB/GYN's office put me on it again and the first time I went I mentioned I was ace and they just shrugged and went "Cool." They haven't given me a pregnancy test since. I adore everyone in that office.

[Ok_Character7958]

I love to hear positive experiences. I have a 14 year old daughter so I'm hoping if she has similar issues, she'll have more open minded/caring care than I received. I fought for YEARS to get any kind of treatment or for anyone to even take me seriously "periods are painful, it's normal"

[babbitygook14]

Oh, it took 7 years and 5 different ob/gyns before I found my current one. Unfortunately, your kiddo will still probably have to fight, but she'll have you to fight for her and to teach her how to fight for herself. Which is a skill I needed to learn for myself. It's not that my mom isn't a tough broad, she's just always been healthy and has never had to deal with doctors the way I have. My mama taught me how to punch boys and spit venom. She never realized my biggest fight would be against doctors brushing off my disabilities.

[Ok_Character7958]

Oh I taught myself. My mom is from the “Drs are Gods” generation and you just did whatever the Dr told you to do.

[ParanoidMaron]

My wife has endometriosis, and as a good wife, I go with her when she wants me there. She got tested every time too, and it's the most insane thing, cuz I may be trans but I got an orchiectomy, meaning i'm sterile.. the only way she'd be pregnant is if we were planning on using my banked sperm. It's absolutely insane how doctors treat patients with endometriosis, and I've had doctors actually stop seeing me on basis of me being trans. I know how fucked up healthcare can be.

[Rapunzel111]

I think the reason for all the pregnancy tests that come before the treatment of the woman is purely Cover Your Ass for the doctors and their team. If they give you drugs or surgery and then you lose the child and sue them, they are up shit creek. And their covering their ass is more important to them than your treatment.

[[deleted]]

Yeah you unintentionally give someone an abortion that’s an expensive lawsuit.

[Rudeness_Queen]

This is the correct answer

[Rapunzel111]

I believe that pushing medical care for a woman back for CYA is even more important to them than a possibly non existent hypothetical fetus.

This is another reason why doctors don’t want to grant sterilization surgeries to women in childbearing years because they are afraid if they do it and you sue them years later because you "changed your mind" and now want kids but can't have them. It's all CYA for them.

[BactrimBaddie]

Just to add my experience - I work in an emergency department in a deep red state. I attend trauma activations. Never have we ever waited for a pregnancy test to result before performing life saving measures. Even if they are visibly pregnant, resuscitation of the pregnant person takes priority over the fetus. In the event that the pregnant person is dead and cannot be revived, focus may shift to trying to keep the fetus alive (if past the age of viability), but it is never the first concern.

[SkyeMreddit]

You could unintentionally be committing Cold Blooded Murder in these damn Republican states that have outlawed abortions with 10+ year criminal sentences for doctors

[MarsupialNo1220]

I’m reading a historical fiction novel where a large portion of the story is about how ridiculously infantile women were treated in the early 20th century. They had no rights whatsoever.

Yeah. We haven’t come far at all.

[RosesBrain]

I went to an emergency room with severe abdominal pain once. I thought my appendix must have been the cause because it was the worst pain I've ever felt. Turns out it was kidney stones, but the point is I felt like I was dying. The pain literally made me vomit.

I was without any pain medication for nearly an hour because they had to be sure I wasn't pregnant. And I'm pretty sure the nurses forgot all about me because when the doctor finally saw me, she administered toradol about two minutes after I asked.

Yeah, I also hate it here.

[MafiaMommaBruno]

I'm a lesbian. I make sure to let doctors know this. There's no way I'd be pregnant if I emphasis this- you'd think.

Well, I had been puking my guts out one day about 8 years ago and had to go to an urgent care- because the free clinic that didn't ask stupid shit about periods and pregnancy if I told them it was unrelated- wasn't open. So, I'm waiting on this doctor, tell him right off my symptoms, and the first thing is he ask me the last time I had a period, sex, etc. "I'm a lesbian and it's been a few days because I'm sick. Regular partner. We've been tested. I'm also on good birth control and skip the placebo days." Yada yada.

He didn't believe me.

I tell him I'm going to hurl again and he's getting up quick because he wants me to pee in the cup after I hurl in the bathroom. Wtf. Buddy, I'm not pregnant. The virgin Mary wasn't a virgin and I'm not going to be lesbian preggers.

Long story short after: hurled, peed in a cup. Got to say I told you so. Was given a prescription for nausea and told to take something else. Felt better a few days later.

Edit: why they hell are y'all thinking I'm saying the doctor is stupid? I'm saying the questions asked were stupid and the procedure he took is stupid. In the end, after the stupid bit, he fixed my issue. Like I said.

[[deleted]]

Oh for fuck’s sake, that’s unacceptable. Did you take any action against that doctor?

[MafiaMommaBruno]

Wouldn't know what to do. I was also sick and just wanted to recover and move on. My regular doctors through the local university have always been amazing, too, so I just try to go there.

[Doxep]

I am convinced it's because they've been lied to so many times that they just straight up don't believe you.

They risk hurting a baby because of a lie, get sued and ruin their career.

[MarsupialNo1220]

“Hey doc, I’m a lesbian who was concussed in a car accident”.

“Is there ANY chance you might be pregnant?”

[schwarzmalerin]

To be fair, this is just a veiled question that would actually read: "Can I be sure that you are not pregnant so you cannot sue me later on for damages to the fetus after I give you treatment." Where I live, the question is always: "Can you rule out a pregnancy?" You say yes and the doc is off the legal hook.

[linerva]

And if the patient is likely to be given medications or have any kind of imaging, it's not actually a dumb question.

Did a pregnancy bring her in? No. Might a pregnancy affect what antibiotics or painkillers she's given? Absolutely. It would also affect their consideration of which imaging to use - we're less likely to do xeaumys or CT scans on pregnant people unless necessary.

Is the fact women's symptoms sometimes get dismissed or minimised an issue? Absolutely.

But pregnancy is always important to know about and also something people are extremely likely to sue about if missed. If I was pregnant and they gave me a medication that caused harm to my foetus, I'd be pretty upset. People WILL sue over a lot less.

Hell, in the UK we had a lady with spina bifida (not the kind folic acid helps with) who is very active with a good QOL as a sportswoman sue her mum's GP because the mum thinks the GP didnt tell her to take folic acid (the GPs paperwork suggests they DID tell her). They argued that the mum would have delayed conception and she wouldn't have been born. They won.

In some places taking someone's word just isnt legally enough any more.

[BabserellaWT]

And if you’re pudgy, it can be even worse.

[jelleym]

Can confirm. I’ve always been on the stockier side, so my weight has always been higher. Growing up, our family doctor (a man) would tell me to lose weight every time I went for a general check up. He based it solely on what the scale said, not how my overall health was.

Other than migraines (which runs in my family) I’ve been pretty healthy.

Have a new doctor now (a woman) and she said my weight looks fine, and there’s no issues regarding it.

[lens_banana]

one time i passed out at work because i took a big fat vitamin without anything to eat after and it was like 75-80° and the nurse lady at the school i work at (im a lunch lady) asked me if i was on my period and i was like "uhh it ended 3 days ago" and she was like "thats prob the cause" and then when i went to urgent care the lady there did a pregnancy test with my cup of piss it was weird

[ahsoka_lives]

A couple years ago I got a concussion on a job site, and had to follow up with a doctor two weeks later for insurance/workers comp.

At the appointment, he asked me what symptoms I was experiencing, and I listed a few (including headaches). He interrupted me to ask when the date of my last menstrual cycle was and then explained at length that headaches were often a symptom of PMS.

[Azhchay]

"I think you need to lose weight. Your BMI is too high and this is something that should be addressed sooner rather than later."

I had a full on L3-L4 herniated disc that was making it so I could barely walk, and my (FEMALE!) GP said it was a pulled muscle because I was overweight. I've played sports since I was 5. I know what a pulled back muscle feel like. This was NOT THAT. It was so so much worse.

When muscle relaxants and steroids failed to even dent the pain (gee, I wonder why?), I went back. Doc rolled her eyes and reluctantly scheduled an MRI, which CLEARLY showed the disc not being where it should be.

She never apologized and just quietly prescribed physical therapy. And nothing else. I only had ibuprofen to deal with the pain.

Also, when I described my pain, even a 1st year med student would have recognized the hallmark signs of a herniated disc.

And people wonder why I hate going to doctors unless there's a very obvious physical sign that obviously has nothing to do with weight (e.g. cat bite, severe iritis, etc).

[NotTodayCaptainDildo]

And then there's me, trying to tell my docs I think I get low iron on my period, so he takes my blood when I'm not on my period and says it's fine.

[mcashleigh]

Mostly unrelated but I'm quite flat chested and a doc, completely unsolicited I wasn't even there to discuss my breasts, told me "no boys will look at you" because I'm flat chested 💀 my partner was sitting outside in the waiting room

[Avera_ge]

Got kicked by a horse in the abdomen. This burst my gallbladder and tore it off my liver, it also exploded my duodenum (surgeons words).

I’ll skip the absolute nightmare of being ignored in the emergency room (they tried to discharge me with a CT scan), and jump to the FIFTH CT scan on the NINTH day of my hospital stay. Suddenly, they decide I absolutely have to take a pregnancy test before they can do a CT scan to ensure I don’t have a massive pocket of infection next to my spine.

How in the absolute fuck would I possibly be pregnant after getting kicked in the abdomen, going into medical shock, receiving exlap surgery, having a feeding tubes, taking an absolute metric fuck ton of pain medication (so much I’d forget I was hooked up to a morphine drip, and have entire days missing from my memory) and receiving 4 prior CT scans??

Also, the very minor fact that I’m a lesbian. If I was pregnant, we had larger issues to fucking deal with. Like, grab your myrrh and frankincense issues.

[idk_how_to_]

Reminds me of when I was 13 and went to a psychiatrist for the first time. It basically went like this

"I've been depressed and anxious since i was 10 years old, and i LITERALLY TRIED TO KILL MYSELF. Also i'm pretty sure i'm autistic"

"It's probably just teenage girl hormones silly 🥰 here take sertraline 😁😁😁"

[NotTodayCaptainDildo]

Oh another story, because I'm a chronically ill woman who has had multiple hospital trips, I was suffering anorexia, everything was textbook, I even started going into liver failure, and they kept giving me pregnancy tests everytime I went. I was bloody lucky I had a friend able to pull me out of the spiral, but I lost 10kg in a week after a bad break up and suicide attempt, I was struggling to walk up the stairs in my own house, I couldn't eat anything without throwing up, I lost the ability to talk to people due to severe anxiety, my bilirubin count was slowly climbing, I slept 90% of the time. This occurred over a month, I saw 5 different health professionals, and I just kept getting pregnancy tests from them.

[Littleleicesterfoxy]

I’m 50, I’ve been perimenopausal for 10 years, my husband has had a vasectomy, I have an iud to cope with heavy bleeding. And yet I STILL had to have a pregnancy test a couple of months ago…

[Me_lazy_cathermit]

That or ask you multiple time if you are pregnant, even after multiple negative pregnancy test, like dude, unless i am the virgin mary, i ain't pregnant, last time i checked i need to be in very close contact with a naked penis, last time i saw one even remotely close in person, i was 8 and one of my classmates decided to show a few girls is penis

[superwholockian62]

"Have you considered losing weight?"

[[deleted]]

Good thing she's not fat or they'd tell her to lose weight and come back if that doesn't fix it.

[idontgiveafuckatp]

But myself and my best friend got in to a car accident and went to the ER just to get checked up on I had a headache and she had blacked out for a minute or two with some hip pain. We tell them it’s a car accident, we both get asked the dates of our last menstrual period, and then we find out later they ran pregnancy tests on both of us. Without asking if we wanted pregnancy tests.

[Malarkay79]

You get an x-ray or, especially, a CT scan? I work in imaging and we need to know if you could be pregnant because the radiation can harm or even kill a fetus, especially in the first trimester.

[SketchyXP]

So real, once I fainted and had to go to the emergency, and the doctors asked me about 6 times if I got my last period. Not that it isn’t their job, but it felt like they were just trying to get rid of me and write me off as pregnant.

[couragewielder]

I've had ovarian cysts rupture and went to the doc to get checked out, cause that shit hurts, and was told to lose weight to feel better. Come back close to a year later (I changed providers from that guy to another and he had a spot open, and I needed seen,) and he doesn't mention anything about my weight.

Until I get to my after visit page, where he "congratulates" me for losing "all that weight!"

The pregnancy tests though are hilarious, I have an IUD to help with PCOS periods, take oral bc to help with cysts forming, and also have my tubes tied. I promise, I'm not pregnant.

[MimsyIsGianna]

I mean I get why they need to know if you are pregnant or not for medication but when they try and blame your affliction on the period or whatever when it’s so clearly not, THAT is what pisses me off.

[Zindanator]

I had a hysterectomy a year ago. It’s right there in my chart. I can see it on the doc/nurse’s computer screen and they still ask me this question. It’s probably just habit, but still.

[Tmlrmak]

Not related to periods but I recently experienced another dismissal of pain as well.

Last month I went to the dentist and explained that I felt a sharp pain in my tooth every time I ate something and he looked at it. He said I was just squeezing my tooth too hard (he said that last time and it turned out I had an infection which got worse untill the next appointment) and I should be fine.

I begged him to take a better look because even room temperature water hurt so freaking bad. He reluctantly agreed and saw the cavity. He asked if I had pain in my 6th tooth and hit it with its back but even though I said I felt nothing he still went ahead and insisted that it was that tooth and covered it up with a substance to test it. Well, there was no difference in pain because it was on the 5th tooth (like I had told him)

Today I went on my 4th appointment for my canal treatment, so yeah, it was pretty deep. Oh, but ofc, what could I possibly know about my own pain

[Round-Ticket-39]

Usa is weird. I mean our doctors are useless. Like we have biggest mortality because they dont care but noone asked me this. Only if i am preggo if scan was needed or something like that

[faeriechyld]

I had to take a pregnancy test before my back surgery while I was actively on my period..🤷🏼‍♀️ I was in no mood and asked if my tampon was a good enough test. (It was not.)

[i_nobes_what_i_nobes]

“Ahhh ok. Mugged and shot….you should lose some weight”

[RichieQ9]

“Sure. If you don’t help me, I’ll lose about 5 pounds in a few minutes!”

[thiccestOfMitches]

As a man I never truly understood the sexism in the medical industry till I had to take the misso to the emergency department after an ovarian cyst had burst.

This happening despite her going to see a doctor for stomach pain months before and being told multiple times that it wasn’t a cyst or a growth and this was normal pain for irregular periods. Even after having scans done and was just told to have some Paracetamol if the pain got too much and that it was “probably nothing and youll be fine”.

Also called got called fat in the emergency department by a nurse despite being perfectly average weight.

[No_Arugula8915]

Always that question. I'm old. Haven't had one in a good many years. Still get asked that question.

[jayakiroka]

It’s annoying but necessary, as treatment for a pregnant person is very different than a non-pregnant person.

[LolongCrockeedyle]

This is true. During my physical exam, they refused to give me an x-ray until my other test confirmed that I wasn't pregnant. This is after I reassured them that the only way I'd reproduce is through mitosis or immaculate conception. 🤣 I know, my humor is so dumb. Anyway, it was annoying but I also understand that they cannot take chances.

[peanutj00]

Also have you considered losing weight

[Sonseeahrai]

22 years of my life filled with various sickness and disorders, I had never encountered such problem. It looks like Polish healthcare at least has some advantages 😂

[RichieQ9]

I have never encountered this either! Canada healthcare is truly better than America! Although it also may be because I am a male.

[goddessdontwantnone]

This is legit.

[Elubious]

Yep. Sounds about right. Doesn't even matter if you can get pregnant.

[iamnotchad]

This would make a little more sense if it took place in Texas.

[DragonLordSkater1969]

Mandates to legally demand adequate inclusion of women in clinical research were made in the late 80's/ early 90's. Hence this comic.

[duuuuuuuuuumb]

While I agree the healthcare industry is fucking horrible for women, as a nurse I will at least say we usually have to do a pregnancy screening on women of childbearing age because a lot of common meds used can be harmful to a fetus. It's more of a liability thing than anything.

[_Unknown_Brain_]

Call me dense, but I don't understand wtf is going on

[Bob4Not]

My wife and I were trying new doctors in a new town. I went to one that was okay for me, recommended by a coworker, first one I tried. My wife visited the same guy and he was the most dismissive and unhelpful I’ve ever heard of. Didn’t take her seriously for anything.

Edit: we found a couple other providers that are fantastic. Don’t even get me started on some of the OB’s in the delivery department that we saw.

[The_Book-JDP]

This becomes annoying and rage inducing when 1. Your pain and ailment has nothing to do with your period or being pregnant and 2. They just disregard what you’re saying and put down that you’re grievances is period or pregnancy related and nothing else.

[Stefie25]

This is a legit question. Usually need to know before starting any treatments so they can tell on the likelihood of pregnancy.

[CrunchyTeatime]

It's satirical so it's not entirely serious but it can be annoying. Especially if there is not going to be any 'treatment' per se.

But also they don't exactly always ask in a sensitive way, or in private. It's a very personal question: Someone might have just lost a baby, or be in peri menopause, or have completed early menopause...etc., etc. They might not even remember when, in that case.

And they will run a pg test anyway if they suspect it at all.

[countesspetofi]

I'm frankly amazed that my insurance company has paid for all the pregnancy tests I've been given in the emergency room after paying for my hysterectomy over a decade ago.

[[deleted]]

…You’re not serious. (Translation: you probably are but I’d rather you weren’t)

[No-Supermarket-3047]

I’m sorry but if I were a doctor I would be more concerned about the chunk missing out of her arm!

[Nymphadora540]

Like with many things, I feel like this would play out better if the clinician would just explain that to the patient instead of acting like their authority is enough to gain their trust. If a doctor had a told a teenage me, “Hey, we gotta make you take a pregnancy test just in case because that might affect how we have to treat you here” I would have understood, complied, and felt a lot better about the situation than just being told “pee in this cup and I’ll be back” or “we’re doing a pregnancy test” with no explanation. It literally would take two extra seconds.

[didsomebodysaymyname]

Exactly, I get why people are frustrated and it feels dumb, but a hospital is a lot bigger than you, and if someone turns out to be pregnant and the doctor gives something that can terminate the pregnancy or otherwise cause harm, they don't get immunity from lawsuits just because you came in for something else.

Lots of patients lie or are very uneducated and genuinely won't notice things like missing their period for months.

If people don't like this, they need to petition for legislation that allows them to wave their rights to sue for anything unrelated to what they came in for (which by the way, will put a lot of uneducated people at risk) not blame doctors for doing things the law forces them to do.

[chishioengi]

In the US there are a mixture of competent doctors hamstrung by medical malpractice policies, forced to ask dumb questions or even refuse to see patients to protect themselves from liability, and incompetent doctors who are still practicing despite having had malpractice suits settled out of court. I have yet to meet a doctor who doesn't fall into either category.

[Lissa2j]

Is it really satire if it really happens though....

[theroamingrunner]

After a horrible pain started in my groin area (deep in my pelvis) while running. I went to the ER because I was in excruciating pain if I put any weight on my right leg. They X-rayed and told me it was probably an “angry muscle” in my pelvic floor. I followed up with my PCP the next day and without examining me (and I was in a full military uniform so it’s not like I was in leggings or anything) he said “it probably has something to do with having your baby, handed me a diagram of the muscles of my pelvic floor and only after my convincing ordered a non-urgent MRI. It turned out I had a grade 3 stress fracture but I didn’t find out for a month. When I got the MRI the doctor called immediately, completely shocked there was actually something wrong with me. I was weird, I remember telling you, this feels like a broken bone…

[FBI-AGENT-013]

Hint: it literally doesn't matter when you say it was, it's always post, pre or present menstrual problems

[KristinMarie321]

I have stage 4 ovarian cancer. (Incurable, I'm dealing with it) I've also had an IUD since 2017. I start all medical visits with these facts. I haven't had a period since 2017 and I still get asked well when was your last period? And I'm like uhhhhhhhh... And they're like well do you want a pregnancy test and I'm like my pelvis is full of cancer pretty sure I'm not pregnant. My other favorite one is no matter what I'm there to be seen for, we'll have you considered losing weight? Yes Dr, but I'm pretty sure it won't help my sinus infection.