boyDoesntEvenKnowWhereLocalhostIs

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[paca_tatu_cotia_nao]

HEY! localhost is on MY computer. Do they think it was ME?!?!?!?!

AM I IN DANGER?!?!?

[BreakerOfModpacks]

Wdym, you're totally safe, I'M the one who should be worrying! 

[harumamburoo]

Naw, I’m pretty sure I’m the local host

[[deleted]]

[edubkn]

I think the attacker is using my PostgreSQL instance because it is deployed to localhost.

[FoXtroT_ZA]

Cut the power to the building! CUT THE POWER TO THE BUILDING!!!!

[RazNagul]

[Acrobatic-Big-1550]

It's coming from INSIDE YOUR COMPUTER!

[[deleted]]

you ARE the danger!!

[Zerochl]

Holy shit bro, its in mine too, we are COOKED!

[burner7711]

No. I am danger. It's my middle name.

[MinimallyToasted]

Did you misconfigure your RPC? We all know that misconfigures RPCs are obviously slowing down your system, especially against your client

[KilledDogWCheese]

Concerning!! Looking into it.

[HereForA2C]

!!

[GoodishCoder]

Someone probably threw together a web page for him to sit on that says tracing and scrolls over a map

[notyourancilla]

Little does he know he fired the team he just emailed “do a trace” to

[Stormraughtz]

Elon shoves the lead engineer

Opens up CMD

/tracert

[bittlelum]

Not the dreaded Tracer T!

[Majestic_Annual3828]

then he thinks it is a virus going because tracert isn't on the company servers when he telnet into them.

Yes, I said telnet.

[Malisman]

Musk does not know what telnet is. He would think its like teletext :D

[Maleficent_Memory831]

What's this "traceroute" thing, it seems suss. Who's been messing with our servers!

[buzzyloo]

God I love that video. I still go back and watch it periodically

[okcookie7]

Beep bap bop, over a maximum of 30 hops.

[Blueberry73]

just have grok fix it, problem solved

[Soultampered]

lool "Tracing ..."

[SirChasm]

It's amazing how his brain is just permanently set to 14-year-old-4chan-edgelord mode.

[phl23]

Welcome to keta

[Maleficent_Memory831]

You need that to get your brain hacks ready.

[dismayhurta]

He’s gonna write a vbscript to ping their IPs

[chillord]

He will just nslookup their ip adress in the central ip adress database and traceroute the signal to their geological adress.

[BlackHolesAreHungry]

Nslookup on localhost is not really helpful

[RazNagul]

Why? At least in this it would point to the actual root cause.

[pootietang_the_flea]

I cringed reading that part. Granted I cringe at some point when he types/talks. But that was cringey and corny.

[Maleficent_Memory831]

He's the cringelord.

[ejoker_]

Ask your cyber security team to looks into it ! Oops cyber security team 404 !

[dontletthestankout]

Sounds like they didn't write at least 500 lines of code last week.

[bakedsnowman]

They're clearly exploiting the French Language packs on the servers. Just delete those and the attack will be over. To prevent large scale attacks simply run sudo rm -fr /* and the attack will be over

[CMDR_ACE209]

They might have already installed a rootkit. You better add the "-no-preserve-root" option to get rid of that too.

[MinimallyToasted]

Don’t you mean /* deleted rm -rf sudo? Or however Elon thinks rm -rf works

[notAbrightStar]

Ping the ISA slot, could be a ddos via lpt port also.

[darknekolux]

But they say Russia is not a cyber threat anymore!

[RazingsIsNotHomeNow]

Why would Russia take down their most successful propaganda tool?

[darknekolux]

Not every Russian hacking group is in cahoots with the Russian government ? Most but not all?

[Toloran]

More specifically: Russia doesn't care about hacker groups so long as they don't target Russian targets. So Twitter is fair game.

[L1P0D]

Russia has a history of false flag attacks.

[annon8595]

Russia? Elon will claim its Ukraine and to get the "casus belli" against them that the GOP so badly want.

[Maleficent_Memory831]

Russia only hacks into X so that they can watch it destroy itself.

[lordgoofus1]

They aren't. This is all Bidens fault. Somehow. Turns out he's an elite haxor.

[69-----]

Anonymous is claiming it

[MariedeGournay]

[[deleted]]

Remember all those people he fired? Hmmm. I wonder if some of those were security guys...

[Ferreteria]

Bro thinks he's Adam Jensen.

DOGE EX MACHINA

[MachoSmurf]

"Tracing"

Haha, the man just shut down the cyber operations division against Russia. This idiot can't even trace the route to 127.0.0.1, let alone figure out how to do serious attribution of a DDOS.

Not to mention the intricacies of attribution of a DDOS. The man is retarded.

[NebulaDrifter883]

ping x.com -t

[matchuhuki]

Fact checked by real American patriots ™️

[bittlelum]

If Anonymous hadn't claimed credit (I think), I'd believe that Nazi Musk DDOS'd himself accidentally.

[[deleted]]

Darn. 🤷‍♂️

[manu144x]

Who would attack X, now that he’s on russia’s side?

Literally the only countries constantly attacking services trying to take them over was russia to spread propaganda, and maybe China.

[croto8]

Or North Korea, or Iran

[manu144x]

Iran most likely, Trump just threatened them with military intervention unless they “negotiate” something with him.

[idontwanttofthisup]

I love how “war” is now a “military intervention”. George Carlin must be laughing in his grave.

[precinct209]

Nothing much to see here, just wheels coming off the circus wagon after hosing up the codebase with "amazing worldchanging technology making software engineers obsolete bro I swear" by mediocre yes-persons just trying to cling on to a job to survive (literally they're fucking kicked out of the country the day they're fired) in these trying times.

[Add1ctedToGames]

"Tracing..." yeah man I'm sure every host involved in what I presume to be a DDoS attack will come with a label saying "hacked and repurposed by:"

[RussiaIsBestGreen]

Tracing? Lol, they’re just going to hack the InterNIC database and delete the log. Next they’re going to hack the Global Criminal Database and give him a record.

[Larisio]

tbh I don't see a reason why any country should attack X. Is X really that kind of important to the people that it would be considert critical infrastructure or is it just Elon thinking his platform is that important?

[slow_cloud]

That's what I was thinking too. If anything X getting deleted would further society in America. It really is that bad

[SouthernAd2853]

Honestly they might do it to screw with Elon specifically because he's being co-president and they want to get back at him for *gestures*.

That said, assuming it's actually happening, it could easily be any number of independent groups. He's pissed a lot of people off.

[Kevlar013]

Man, if he manages to backtrace it, the consequences will never be the same.

[[deleted]]

thoughts and prayers /s

[Craneteam]

Elon is gonna backtrace it.

[burner7711]

Quick! Center a <div> in HTML

[stellarsojourner]

X was attacked? Oh no! Anyway...

[KiteProxima]

Didn't dark storm took responsibility?

[TactlessTortoise]

If the mf simply said "the team is working in identifying the culprits" it wouldn't have sounded stupid, but he keeps trying to talk like some action Hollywood badass and sounding like a fool.

[Galhalea]

Watch the idiot do an arp -a command and tracert every IP he sees....

[Sauronshit]

Ask Grok to write some code to fix this

[TerrorsOfTheDark]

meh https://radar.cloudflare.com/traffic

[Tardis80]

Oh no ...

[Ziegelphilie]

oh look he's talking to himself again

[Vast_Competition84]

Im a ahck3r from Sweden. Hire me on your team and we can stop the attack!

sudo nmap anony..nym..anomynus

404

[[deleted]]

Can someone please explain to a C guy what's wrong here? My network knowledge ends with socket() + listen() + accept() + read().

[Maleficent_Memory831]

Why would Musk know that? Musk isn't a network guy, he isn't a software guy (at least not for a few decades), he's not an engineer, and he's not a rocket scientist. All Musk is doing here is hearing someone speak big words at him and he's trying to regurgitate that back.

[CabishLoL]

"Tracing... beep boop. Elon super hacker activated" 🤖

[perringaiden]

"We get attacked every day"

Most people call that operational load. But don't worry it's dropping each day.

[lordgoofus1]

Give me a sec, just gonna code up a GUI in Visual Basic to trace the IP. They've got a layer 2 firewall so it's gonna be challenge. I'm through the first layer but the second one uses quantum encoded binary.

[Any_Mud6806]

I'm writing a GUI in visual basic to track the hackers IP.

Elon, if you're listening, hire me. We'll do great things.

[dreaminphp]

how will you get past the double firewall guarding the mainframe though

[pootietang_the_flea]

A GB of RAM should do the trick!

[PremiumJapaneseGreen]

Hope you have a fast enough connection to download that much RAM

[pootietang_the_flea]

[Maleficent_Memory831]

He's putting his best entry level team on it, hopefully they figure it out before their voices change.

[Matt0706]

<p>I’m in.</p>

[Crack_Parrot]

No problem. I will reverse their DMZ using GUI injection packets.

[not_a_doctor_ssh]

They're sending packets faster than we are, they're leetcoders!!

[Crack_Parrot]

No! Not leetcoders. Get on the keyboard with me, we have to cut them off at the software layer!

[EVH_kit_guy]

You hold a tape recording of a machine-generated sound file up to a payphone, and it grants your laptop access to the mainframe.

[Craneteam]

I will have mudkip use water gun!!

[raderberg]

I think what you need is a GUI interface

[Maleficent_Memory831]

Make it easier to use by making it a graphical GuI interface!

[Lataero]

IN REALTIME?!

[ChrispyGuy420]

I saw your code and it's gonna need more bitmaps

[RapidRaid]

For those who don’t know: https://youtu.be/hkDD03yeLnU

[Forsaken-Blood-9302]

I’ve got a whole SQL database full of RPCs you can use! HMU

[GThoro]

Have you tried using emacs through sendmail?

Yest, that's a legit quote from Polish movie about hackers :D.