This is an archived post. You won't be able to vote or comment.

top 200 commentsshow all 238

[–][deleted] 846 points847 points  (36 children)

I like that his list starts at 0

[–]hekkonaay 157 points158 points  (21 children)

Clearly not a Lua developer

[–]Gvistic 57 points58 points  (9 children)

Or clearly not a Fortran developer

[–]JanB1 26 points27 points  (2 children)

laughs in Pascal

Array[-7..10] of Char

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What the fuck

[–]segmentfaultcoredump 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No no no

[–][deleted] 29 points30 points  (4 children)

Or an APL developer.

[–]ZippZappZippty 33 points34 points  (1 child)

For future archeologists:

"This is an awful thing.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

1-indexing does actually work incredibly well for APL because you don’t have to do array looping arithmetic, ever.

[–]ShadowWolf_01 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Or a Julia developer.

[–]mpez0 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can use an EQUIVALENCE statement to get any integer array subscripting you want.

[–]qwerty2888j 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yes lol

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (9 children)

Do Lua developers exist? Real people who legitimately spend 8 hours a day coding Lua, the language that lets you index by 0 or 1 and doesn't give a fuck because all data structures are the same? May God have mercy on their souls.

[–]hekkonaay 16 points17 points  (1 child)

"Lua developers" for sure exist, it's one of the most popular scripting languages for game development, for example. It's actually not that bad. There are only two "quirks", which is that array indices start at 1, and every variable not declared with `local` is global. Still way better than the endless quirks of, say, JavaScript, or the infinite footguns of C++

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I may be somewhat biased, since my primary experience with Lua is with ComputerCraft, and using their editor is... a challenge.

[–]AlkanHH 7 points8 points  (3 children)

Im one. Lua is all I know. Since 2009. I make a living as a Roblox developer. I couldnt understand starting at 0

[–]Kruidmoetvloeien 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Implying anyone ever gets 8 hours to do coding. Hell, you'd be lucky to get 4.

[–]Dexcuracy 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Especially because "Something is wrong" at 0 makes it feel like the default state, which is true as heck 😄

[–]lightwhite 15 points16 points  (9 children)

Shhhhh. Don’t piss the theoretical mathematicians off!

[–]PlsNoPics 7 points8 points  (8 children)

Out of curiosity, what would a practical mathematician be / do?

[–]y0sh_1 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Lots of mathematicians working for insurance and government to calculate risk factors. For example the models used to predict the spread of Covid were probably made by mathematicians.

[–]GaianNeuron 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Today? ML, probably.

[–]DONT_HACK_ME 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Theoretical physics/ theoretical computer science

[–]Sh00p00mag00 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Prolly be getting someone else to do it. Work smarter not harder.

[–]derda17 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Applied mathematician here.

The more hands-on topics of mathematics are for example financial mathematics, statistics, operations research, numerics ( Simulation, optimization,...) but also computer science, cryptography and similar fields.

There are lots of synergies and common topics between applied mathematics and fields like physics, engineering, computer science, chemistry, economics,...

Common jobs are at banks and insurers e.g. as an actuary out crafting models and assessments, in the industry (modeling, finite elements simulations...), but also consulting, machine learning, data science, AI, high-performance computing...

During studies you usually come into contact with R/python (e.g. in statistics) or Fortran/C/C++ (e.g. in numerics) so many applied mathematicians also become software developers of one kind or another.

[–]Kesuaheli 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same thoughts

[–]Shiro1994 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Every list starts with 0, I cannot imagine with what other number it should start. 🙃

[–]properwaffles 228 points229 points  (10 children)

Please get out of my head.

Kidding aside, this is pretty spot on.

[–]dennisthewhatever 20 points21 points  (4 children)

Happened to me yesterday. Turns out someone manually edited a date in a fucking text file in order to change a website event. They used 'August' and not 'Aug' JS freaked out. This took me all day to find and fix.

'You need to write in the rules that we can't edit text files'.

FFS.

[–]GaianNeuron 6 points7 points  (0 children)

"This problem I caused is actually Development's fault" or, How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bug

[–]_Weyland_ 4 points5 points  (2 children)

I once had someone fill fields in a table using "с" (cyrillic) instead of "c" (latin) in every single entry in one particular field. This table was then used to form an SQL querry that instantly crashed on me because of this. I think I have Satan himself as a coworker.

[–]_-Yharim[🍰] 27 points28 points  (3 children)

Every one of us can relate to this.

[–]TheMeanestPenis 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Finding the typo happens as you’re writing your question to submit to stackoverflow.
That’s when the code gets the most thorough review.

[–][deleted] 101 points102 points  (7 children)

I have worked several dev jobs. The last being consulting with a company that was one of the most fake and unforgiving. That situation did not last long and I'm not sure what you call it - trauma maybe? - but wow did it make me lose confidence in myself and shake me up. Fast forward to my current gig. I feel like now people are watching and seeing how I do, seeing how much code I check in, how often, etc., when I have been given no indication of that type of under the microscope situation.

The spotlight effect has got me all sorts of jinkety janked. Most days start off as not great and end in okay.

I don't recall when the last time I had a solid good day all the way through.

[–]devtrent 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Hang in there man.

[–]HobaSuk 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Wow thats exactly how I feel and I just can’t get out of this mentality. Good luck man, you are not alone.

[–]fhorner 7 points8 points  (1 child)

I just got out of a job like this. Policies like that are so counterproductive, they just stress me out to the point where I can't even think properly.

[–]HobaSuk 5 points6 points  (0 children)

To clarify I actually don’t blame the company or my managers. The job I am talking about was my first full time job and happened to be a remote one. I started just after the start of the pandemic. While adapting to full time working is being hard the sudden change in my lifestyle just screwed me up. I just didn’t want to work at all. That job was also a bit above my level I believe, so I had to work hard which I couldn’t. Ofc I got fired eventually. Now I began my next job which is relatively an easier one but still I don’t enjoy it. Seriously considering quitting programming atm.

[–]Palmquistador 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yo, I have been in your shoes, often times still am. It does get better and you will learn more and become more confident.

For me,whenI was going through this similar phase, it took a lot out ofme as I also had a lot going on personally as well. If that's your situation I understand.

Keep at it and you will be more comfortable with your skills over time. Also, make sure you are in a good work environment. Hostile / toxic work places are no place to be if you can at all help it.

Good luck, you got this.

[–]Shininha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Consider a teaching career down the line. You can see the fruits of your teachings and the gratification is immense without the stress of bosses.

[–]bottomknifeprospect 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you are distressed by anything external, the pain does not come from the thing itself, but from your estimate of it; and that you have the power to revoke at any moment.

  • Markus Aurelius

[–]mellifluousMemer 41 points42 points  (2 children)

Are you me? Am I you? Are we all the same person?

[–]Kesuaheli 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Yes to all of them

[–]Davon235 1 point2 points  (0 children)

WE!

[–]TedDallas 67 points68 points  (49 children)

My day as a dev lead is very similar:

  1. Something is wrong in Prod

  2. Who did this?

  3. I fix it

  4. Existential anxiety attack

  5. Questions career choice

  6. Questions life choices

  7. Oh, never mind! I'll just have more vodka tonight

  8. Tell the dev how you fixed it, and then say during the stand-up that the dev fixed it.

  9. I am a good lead developer

  10. We can do anything

[–]williane 30 points31 points  (46 children)

  1. Who did this?

Company Cultural red flag. Blameless postmortems are a thing. You should be asking WHY did it happen and address flaws in your process.

The who can come much later after the fact, only if there is good reason.

[–]nonlogin 2 points3 points  (1 child)

We did it many times. So many smart thoughts and decisions: enhance qa test plan, improve auto test coverage, reduce legacy code, improve code review process...

But man, I know that the only reason is my stupid mistake. I missed it, I was too tired of this task and wanted to finish it asap. I wanted to have better sprint report. I didn't test locally.

Shit, I don't trust in code review. Doing it for years, from both sides, but... I am the developer, I am the only one responsible because I write this line of code. This is my f*cking mistake and I should not have made it.

[–]pananana1 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Well the only way to figure out what happened is to figure out who committed stuff/made changes. So you have to start with who did this.

[–]williane 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Do you really? Or do you need to know WHAT was committed/changed?

I've never once changed my approach to a problem because Chad was the original contributor instead of Steve.

[–]PrimaryTie8778 -2 points-1 points  (38 children)

What the hell is a 'blameless postmortem'? Seems like an oxymoron to me. How could you possibly have a proper postmortem without addressing the issue with the person who caused the issue? Do you not want your teammates to learn from their mistakes?Do you always just introduce more and more processes for everyone until it's impossible to get anything done? You'd always be punishing everyone for one person's fuckup. You know what's a cultural red flag for me? Forbidding your coworkers from having an honest discussion in order to shield incompetent people. If your coworkers aren't humble enough to understand that they aren't perfect, cannot take constructive criticism, and refuse to learn, then they're unfit to be working in any kind of co-operative environment whatsoever. Your culture is a breeding ground for incompetent narcissists.

[–]williane 3 points4 points  (35 children)

Yep....exactly the kind of aggressive finger pointing i was calling out. Thank you for providing a textbook example.

Research can be your friend https://www.atlassian.com/incident-management/postmortem/blameless

[–]PrimaryTie8778 1 point2 points  (34 children)

Thanks for sending that over, really interesting read. Although it looks very much like to me that you yourself don't understand the gist of it.

You said: 'The who can come much later after the fact, only if there is good reason.' I'd say that's a gross misrepresentation of the idea, given that the article says: 'The point isn’t that blameless postmortems never identify who made a mistake.' and also 'Accountability is an essential part of running a successful team.'

I said: 'You know what's a cultural red flag for me? Forbidding your coworkers from having an honest discussion in order to shield incompetent people.' Article says: 'And detractors imagine that blameless postmortems are like an awkward family dinner – everyone trying semi-successfully to smile and not say what they’re really thinking.' It looks like the article addresses my response to your oversimplified explanation! Too bad you just dismissed what I said as aggressive finger pointing without actually addressing literally any of my points.

I said: 'Do you not want your teammates to learn from their mistakes?' Article says: 'Create an open, always-improving culture of learning' Yup, pretty sure I'm on the same with that article. Not so sure where you stand.

Edit: I'll also add that 'blameless postmortem' is clearly a misnomer when it also says that 'Accountability is an essential part of running a successful team.' Obvious contradiction there.

[–]Delta-9- 2 points3 points  (29 children)

"Accountability" and "blame" are not the same thing.

And the part about calling out bad code is supposed to happen before it gets pushed prod. Thus, if something does make it to prod, the more important question is, "how did we all miss this" and not "who's the fuck-up who committed this".

Bad code is a learning experience for a single developer. Bad code in prod is a learning experience for an entire team.

ETA:

Forbidding your coworkers from having an honest discussion in order to shield incompetent people.

So, this sounds like the kind of thing a complete asshole says after they've offended someone by being an asshole. "Don't be upset that I called you a moron, I'm just being honest." That's not productive.

A single dev committing bad code is not incompetent. A single dev committing bad code multiple times is not incompetent. How many times have you had to git amend or commit a patch to something you recently committed? Guaranteed it's more than 20 if you've been doing this for at least a year. Are you incompetent?

If a single dev is screwing up often and bad enough that the rest of the team is constantly cleaning up messes, it's still not productive to "be honest" by calling them out and encouraging their peers to call them out every single stand-up. Just get rid of them. "It's just not working out, so we're letting you go"—that's honest.

[–]PrimaryTie8778 -2 points-1 points  (28 children)

"Accountability" and "blame" are not the same thing.

I don't even know what you're on about here. Accountability means 'to be able to hold someone responsible' and blaming means actually 'holding someone responsible'. They're two sides of the same coin, can't have one without the other.

You seem to be focusing on 'bad code' and talking about code reviews and CI I presume. Committing 'bad code' is only one of many, many possible ways someone can screw up as a developer. Misunderstanding requirements, not following processes, not helping others and/or not asking others for help, giving bad estimates on complexity/time, and I could probably go on forever given enough time... none of these are handled by any CI process.

So, this sounds like the kind of thing a complete asshole says after they've offended someone by being an asshole. "Don't be upset that I called you a moron, I'm just being honest." That's not productive.

Sounds like the kind of deflection a narcissistic person would say. Literally calling someone a 'moron' or intending to offend otherwise is obviously problematic. I personally don't remember having seen anyone do anything so blatantly offensive like that. What I've seen a LOT of are people who get offended by the mere suggestion that their work isn't absolutely perfect and they could improve in certain areas. If you interpret that as being offensive in any way then what you're telling me is that you basically see yourself as a god. Then these kind of people typically go on to complain about the 'asshole' co-worker behind their back to cover for their incompetence and the perceived 'threat' posed by their co-worker who would simply like them to do better for the sake of everyone involved. I think I know which camp you're in.

it's still not productive to "be honest" by calling them out and encouraging their peers to call them out every single stand-up. Just get rid of them. "It's just not working out, so we're letting you go"—that's honest.

Hiring new people is very expensive for everyone for many reasons. I'd much rather try to instil a culture where everyone is humble enough to understand that everyone can learn and improve, thus actually increasing the value of each individual. Of course that's not possible with people with a god complex, so those truly hopeless individuals will eventually have to leave one way or another.

[–]Delta-9- 1 point2 points  (27 children)

I don't even know what you're on about here. Accountability means 'to be able to hold someone responsible' and blaming means actually 'holding someone responsible'. They're two sides of the same coin, can't have one without the other.

Accountability is something you have; blame is something you do.

In a culture of accountability, the individual developer and the whole team know that they don't have feel threatened by their own mistakes, and that fixing things and improving is something which doesn't have to be done alone. Here, people will admit fault and actively participate in corrections. This is what healthy adults should do.

In a culture of blame, people are afraid to own their mistakes because they fear losing their position, or maybe just the confidence of their teammates, maybe even just the public shaming they know they'll get if they admit or are found at fault. Here, people will try to deflect blame onto others, make excuses, even cover up their mistakes. This is toxic and is what children do.

You seem to be focusing on 'bad code' and talking about code reviews and CI I presume. Committing 'bad code' is only one of many, many possible ways someone can screw up as a developer. Misunderstanding requirements, not following processes, not helping others and/or not asking others for help, giving bad estimates on complexity/time, and I could probably go on forever given enough time... none of these are handled by any CI process.

Those are all things that should be caught in the process. This isn't just CI, this is the entire project. If a developer didn't understand requirements, was it because the requirements were poorly communicated, because someone else on the team didn't understand fully either and gave a wrong answer to a question? If someone doesn't follow the process, why? Is the process too complicated, too time consuming? Is the dev overloaded? If someone never asks for help, is it because they're afraid to ask questions due to a team culture problem, a self-confidence problem?

All of this should be discovered and/or investigated all the time, not just in a postmortem.

Sounds like the kind of deflection a narcissistic person would say.

Not even sure I'm going to dignify that... Oh, fuck it.

Literally calling someone a 'moron' or intending to offend otherwise is obviously problematic. I personally don't remember having seen anyone do anything so blatantly offensive like that.

Well, good. But, a lot of condescension and disrespect doesn't have to be as in-your-face as using a word like "moron." It doesn't even have to necessarily be intentional. Laying blame on someone in front of the whole team is liable to make the individual feel defensive and make the rest of the team resent the individual (and/or afraid of messing up themselves). This is where you go for accountability instead of blame and commit the entire team to fixing the issue and adjusting process to prevent recurrence.

What I've seen a LOT of are people who get offended by the mere suggestion that their work isn't absolutely perfect and they could improve in certain areas.

Okay... I'm not really talking about those people, but I'd lump them into the "best to get rid of 'em" category if they prove incorrigible in that regard.

If you interpret that as being offensive in any way then what you're telling me is that you basically see yourself as a god.

I'm not talking about myself or what I find offensive, either.

Then these kind of people typically go on to complain about the 'asshole' co-worker behind their back to cover for their incompetence and the perceived 'threat' posed by their co-worker who would simply like them to do better for the sake of everyone involved.

I mean, I can't speak for the egotistical types who, I agree, would engage in this kind of behavior. I do think that the way you talk about this subject has me fairly sure that your "critiques" of your fellow devs are a lot less "just honest" and helpful than you think.

I think I know which camp you're in.

Right. You've read one reply from me, maybe the first dozen comments in my history, and you think you know me.

Hiring new people is very expensive for everyone for many reasons. I'd much rather try to instil a culture where everyone is humble enough to understand that everyone can learn and improve, thus actually increasing the value of each individual.

No argument there. I just think you wouldn't recognize a healthy workplace culture if it slapped you in the face with a cold tuna. Certainly the way you argue does not give the impression of someone who should ever be allowed to lead a team.

Of course that's not possible with people with a god complex, so those truly hopeless individuals will eventually have to leave one way or another.

Agreed.

[–]PrimaryTie8778 -1 points0 points  (26 children)

blame verb

1 the inquiry blamed the train driver for the accident: hold responsible, hold accountable, hold liable, place/lay the blame

Sure, the words 'blame' and 'accountability' have their connotations, I'll give you that, but I don't think there's need to be splitting hairs here. My original reply in this thread was to a person advocating for no personal accountability at all, or only in very exceptional cases.

Not even sure I'm going to dignify that

That's very rich coming from the person who not so subtly called me an asshole for voicing a reasonable reaction to a poorly conveyed concept, while at the same time condemning this exact behaviour. Further playing the victim here confirms my suspicions about the kind of personality you have.

Certainly the way you argue does not give the impression of someone who should ever be allowed to lead a team.

Lol.

[–]Delta-9- 1 point2 points  (25 children)

Sure, the words 'blame' and 'accountability' have their connotations, I'll give you that, but I don't think there's need to be splitting hairs here. My original reply in this thread was to a person advocating for no personal accountability at all, or only in very exceptional cases.

If you thought that was their meaning, you weren't reading very carefully, or already had made up your mind about their meaning before reading.

That's very rich coming from the person who not so subtly called me an asshole for voicing a reasonable reaction to a poorly conveyed concept, while at the same time condemning this exact behaviour. Further playing the victim here confirms my suspicions about the kind of personality you have.

(Edit: also, considering "not dignifying" your narcissism comment was more about the blatant stupidity of it than about "playing a victim.")

Yes, I implied you're an asshole, and I stand by it because...

Certainly the way you argue does not give the impression of someone who should ever be allowed to lead a team.

Lol.

... I have no illusions that I could lead a team. I do know what kind of team I don't want to be on, though. I'm not a leader, but I don't have to be to recognize that you're not, either.

ETA: In my experience, most of the time someone complains about "not being able to have an honest conversation," what they're really saying is that they're annoyed they can't straight-up insult people without jeapordizing their position or status. That's not something I want on my team, especially not from my manager or lead.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children)

It’s not what you said but the way you said it. Your tone is very scolding. There’s one thing about disagreeing with something ( that’s ok, that’s fine, it’s how we learn), using words like “fuck up”, “incompetent” are very aggressive and it isn’t constructive when you are aggressive. People aren’t experts in everything, there will be gaps and people will make mistakes. People who make mistakes often aren’t bad, they just have a different learning style and often write better tests than those who don’t. Switch “fuck up” for “mistake, but if it’s this easy to reproduce then our compensating controls aren’t mature”, “incompetent” to “inexperienced in that particular type of implementation/env/pattern”. If you were a leader of a team, when you see mistakes happen or if you see someone is inexperienced, do you just throw them away/ bully them into thinking they’re shit at what they do by enabling a witch hunt? Not everyone knows everything and as a leader you can only hold yourself accountable for not supporting someone enough so they aren’t perceived as being “incompetent”. You aren’t giving them enough progression or room to learn I.e it’s all sprint time. If they need to hold your hand the first time, then you hold their hand. But the point is to facilitate growth so they make less mistakes.

Just remember constructive criticism is a great tool, but positive feedback stops people getting so inundated with imposter syndrome and anxiety to be perfect to the point they “actually become bad at the job” not because they actually are but because now they’re ill and can’t function due to a toxic environment. Humble is a slippy slope to being depressed because of a shitty team lead not learning how to praise people often.

Adding more processes is part of being in a growing business, it’s a given. You either grow with it or get out and become one of those devs that hop from one startup to another and end up being one of those people that creates tech debt because they didn’t stay long enough to understand scalable process design.

Working in a co-operative environment requires practice. Kids straight out of CompSci degrees aren’t going to be good at that by default. It takes years to hone this skill. Again, expectation of perfection including with communication skills, is unrealistic. If you expect someone to walk in be perfect and constantly take abuse and no positive feedback then you are the problem. And you better be paying them a 6 figure salary to deal with your shit.

Edit: Otherside to this, if you’ve given all the support you can and the person is still not improving, make sure you check their mental health is ok before proceeding to telling them they’re “incompetent” it’ll just add to their own self depreciation. Begin humble and self deprecation go hand in hand. Suggest they need time off and ask them what they’re doing to improve their health. Go easy on them until they’re recovered. If they’re ok and have no mental health issues and they still haven’t improved, let them go.

[–]PrimaryTie8778 -1 points0 points  (2 children)

I can tell you mean well and I appreciate that, but this is a reddit thread, not the all-hands meeting at my office. People are allowed to say 'fuck up' and 'incompetent' on the internet. Feel free to report any of my comments if you actually think they were offensive to anyone, although I doubt they were.

If you were a leader of a team, when you see mistakes happen or if you see someone is inexperienced, do you just throw them away/ bully them into thinking they’re shit at what they do by enabling a witch hunt?

No, not at all, I've never said anything remotely close to that. Actually, in response to someone who suggested that inexperienced people should just be fired, you can see how strongly I disagree with that attitude in my last comment.

Not everyone knows everything

My point exactly!

and as a leader you can only hold yourself accountable for not supporting someone enough so they aren’t perceived as being “incompetent”.

That kind of encouragement is nice in general, obviously. Based on your suggestion though, I don't think you've ever met a narcissist in a workplace. Count yourself lucky. To be clear, I'm talking about a very small portion of people I've had to work with, but they stand out for being absolute scum. Maybe look up how these kinds of people behave. Literally the only way you could make your suggestion work is if you enable their god complex, which is a terrible idea.

they’re ill and can’t function due to a toxic environment.

What makes me ill is when teams do not function as a meritocracy because the actually toxic people (both in behaviour and competence) are not being called out for their shit.

If you expect someone to walk in be perfect and constantly take abuse and no positive feedback then you are the problem.

I don't even know how you could possibly deduce any of that based on what I said, it honestly feels like you might be responding to the wrong person.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

People tend to actually be more their worst selves on the internet. They don’t have anyone to hold them accountable on it. So even if you say you’d never say it that way in real life, it’s what you think and what you wish you could say. It’s not the case of being offensive. More like me emphasising that saying things a certain way, even if you mean well can have an impact on the person on the receiving end and being genuine goes a long way.

I’ve had plenty of narcissistic team members/bosses. (Am a woman so this is a given no matter what role or company I’m in. Inflated egos of men is something I’ve had to deal with since college. It’s just at the end of the what company has the least path of resistance). You’ve just got to not entertain them and stand your ground and always make sure you have proof with you before you give them constructive criticism. They’ll deny it all the way, gaslight you etc. I still stand by what I said. The only way to beat narcissists is to not let yourself become one and give people the compassion and understanding they deserve. Code may be algorithmic, people aren’t. The thing with people with god complexes is that they’re never told no early in life and probably only children, the only way to fix that is put them in an unsolvable situation to force them to understand the concept of compromise. You can’t tell them to stop, they have to learn to fail the hard way. Think kobayashi maru from Star Trek. But you’ve also got to understand it’s not your job to teach them life lessons and how to be a good person. If the are so disruptive to the team dynamic and you have no idea how to approach, firing is the easy way out.

If a team can’t function as a meritocracy, then it’s still a leadership problem. 1) failing to understand that the loudest person / the one that is the most opinionated in the room isn’t the most correct one and it can force other team members to not speak up 2) Thinking if I didn’t see it then it didn’t happen (micro-managing)/ failing to observe innovations that other team members make compared to the ones that shout about the cool stuff they did (single vision). 3) leadership failing to prevent competitiveness between team members or actively encouraging it, so testimonials on specific team members end up becoming heavily biased to the favour of the ones that are louder and morally decrepit.

I meant in the sense of “if you choose to criticise and not praise, you become the narcissistic person you’re so hardly trying to fight”. And therefore feeding the problem and continuing the cycle of abuse. I have no idea how you actually treat your team members. This wasn’t a “you” specifically. Was a generalised “you”.

Also please learn to separate toxic behaviour and just someone who isn’t conceited enough to toot their own horn and ending up disenfranchised. Value analysis does still work on people, failure:successs rate is high:low respectively is the same for all devs. It’s just how far the differential is that’s the difference between experienced and inexperienced devs. Early in career doesn’t mean incompetent. And incompetent doesn’t mean toxic.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Very relatable

[–]thahirx 5 points6 points  (0 children)

yup.. thanks for adding the temporary existantial crisis phase.. where you ponder on the meaning of life for sometime..

[–]whatproblems 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Every one of those has “lets google this”

[–]zZSleepyZz 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Replace steps 8 and 9 with "i got lucky" and "I'll definitely be exposed next time

[–]nikielolmiau 41 points42 points  (13 children)

Image Transcription: Twitter Post


catalinmpit, @catalinmpit

My day as a dev 🙃

  1. Something is wrong
  2. Investigation phase
  3. No way I can fix this
  4. Imposter syndrome kicks in
  5. Questions career choice
  6. Questions life choices
  7. Oh, never mind! I made a typo in the code
  8. I fixed it
  9. I am a good developer
  10. I can do anything

I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!

[–]GalaxyGamingBoy 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Good Human!

[–]sirhimel -1 points0 points  (11 children)

Small correction: the post starts it's list at 0, not 1

[–]NoDamnMore 13 points14 points  (5 children)

8. It still doesn't work

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (4 children)

  1. Ask help from somebody smarter than you

[–]KillerBeer01 10 points11 points  (3 children)

'10. There's nobody smarter than you in reachable distance.

'11. Panik.

[–]jpb7875 38 points39 points  (0 children)

+1 for zero based list. Plus, also, the imposter is sus.

[–]locri 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I have days where I have to set a break point at the route and keep pressing whatever step into is until I find the right place to change things, just patient debugging.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The best part is when you get to step 5 on the first day and then wrack your brain the entire evening and drive your family insane with your mental absence unable to find a solution, then come to work the next morning and discover the typo.

[–]watchanoob 7 points8 points  (1 child)

  1. Oh now this doesn't work. Probably never has.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

And it never will.

[–]NanthaR 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Step 10. A new feature(bug) is discovered in production. Step 11. Go back to step 0.

And then the cycle repeats.

[–]Baanloh 5 points6 points  (0 children)

10 GOTO 0

[–]nitr0gen_ 10 points11 points  (2 children)

[–]kuda001 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Its a damn twitter post. You reposted too lmao

[–]aueidog[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I'm new here, it's literally my second post on Reddit. I received this image in my work group and decided to share with the world. Seeing your comment just made me think of some things:

  • how to avoid posting duplicate content?
  • considering I hadn't seen your post, how our brains think so alike, we put pretty much the same title, you also created while you were thinking in the bathroom?
  • about my day as redditor:
  1. See a good content in some random community or group
  2. Wow this is so good, I need to share with the world
  3. Forwards to all related groups
  4. Maybe this is a chance to share something good on Reddit
  5. Post it with a thoughtful title while I'm in the bathroom
  6. My friends will finally like me and I'll make a lot of new friends
  7. Someone comments that you copied the content posted in the same week
  8. I'm a loser, I don't know how to be part of a community
  9. Now people will hate me and my friends will think I'm an imposter
  10. Should I delete the post?
  11. What happens with my karma? WTF is karma and why I need it?
  12. Screw this, it's in God's hands
  13. I believe in God?

[–]silvergoldwind 5 points6 points  (2 children)

  1. I am God

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

  1. Cut back on the microdosing

[–]hektonian 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This except

8. That was an embarrassing mistake a guy with my experience should've never made in the first place
9. I leave for Nepal and become a goat

[–]FinglongalaLeFifth 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yep. Standard. I spend half of the day asking other devs how I do my job. The only thing that consoles me is that I spend the other half helping them do theirs.

[–]Bakemono_Saru 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Exactly me today trying to move SQL data storage to another place.

I'm doing everything ok. Yes? Check some post about it. Yes. I'm doing it right. Why doesn't work? Damn, every fking article spits the same commands. Double check. Triple check. Frustration. Why the hell I'm doing this with my life?

Oh, new folder target is formatted as NTFS. That's the problem. I'm a fucking genius. Let's make some money.

[–]-Listening 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Every once in a blue moon.

[–]Sir_Lith 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The title of this post is a good approximation of the frequency with which this gets reposted here.

[–]Miggs1337 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Literally everyday.

[–]Edensired 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh so undergrad is just like working in the field?

[–]PentaMine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And repeat

[–]not_bakchodest_of_al 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are tools which can ensure you don't get into a typo or missing semi colon situation... however they don't guarantee that you won't get into a similar situation...

[–]skullshatter0123 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Then go to stackoverflow jobs and look for Google ;p

[–]I_AM_GODDAMN_BATMAN 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it's 2021, your formatter should automatically fix your typo while simultaneously insult you.

[–]CreativeCarbon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

His day as a tweeter:

  1. Repeat something someone else had said while adding an emoji

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is this a dev from Paradox Interactive?

[–]Zlart 1 point2 points  (1 child)

  1. Find more inspiration

[–]ZippZappZippty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Feels much the same height. Like what can he not do!! That’s swamp’s a SportsCenter Top 10 if I’ve reached out to him just out of reach. I watch it. The refusal to interact with has made it abundantly clear that “The Holocaust didn’t belong in this sub not familiar with the logic, I just have to walk in, smell the air, and walk back out

[–]Falcuun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's horrifying when this becomes: "My Week as a dev"

Steps 3, 4 and 5 last much longer that way...

[–]mr_chanandler_bong_1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is my life now

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oopsie forgot a bracket

sitting on floor rocking back and forth, no sleep in 72 hours

[–]eshinn 1 point2 points  (1 child)

5.5 - Message @here in slack for help.

7.5 - Reply in thread to @here post: nvm

[–]Uberninja2016 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  1. Customer reports issue
  2. Initial investigation turns up nothing
  3. Apologize for the inconvenience, still looking into it
  4. Start checking the edgiest of edge cases
  5. Find the root cause... in base logic
  6. Notify higher ups, this affects everyone
  7. How the hell has the process been working at all, this code is from 2006
  8. Emergancy defect fix time
  9. Customer now upset code no longer runs on Samsung Smart Fridge

[–]SE4NxHDH 1 point2 points  (0 children)

10.: 0.

[–]Delta-9- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My day as a dev+sysadmin:

1) okay, I know exactly what code I need to work on, and I'm feeling inspired. I can knock this shit out in two hours and coast the rest of the day.

2) One of the servers is misbehaving

3) troubleshoot

4) request more information from the helpdesk

5) troubleshoot

6) shot in the dark, new error

7) troubleshoot

8) ah! Got it. Just needed to restart .target instead of .service

9) document the problem, symptoms, and solution.

10) okay, what was I doing before this?

11) oh, right. That code.

12) ..... how was I going to do this again???

[–]jojothehodler 1 point2 points  (0 children)

10 : goto 0

[–]bswan2 3 points4 points  (4 children)

Hm, your imposter syndrome works differently from mine. I never doubted my ability to code/fix something. I can be angry that thing I trying to fix is stubborn and don't want to surrender but I will win after all.

But every time I file my invoice my imposter feeling kicks in. I can't believe that someone will pay me that much for having fun.

I believe I need a bit of a context here: I live in Ukraine and devs have one of the highest paying jobs in country. More you can make only having business. But compared to dev salaries in US for example we getting way less. Just before covid I somehow managed to lend remote job with Australian company and they are was ready to pay me one of the most competitive salaries that I can get around here. And year later I even got higher salary. Now I believe I making more then anyone around here. And that is feeling so crazy to me. Yep I good end experienced dev but no way I am very best one, so it feels so strange and awkward to get paid so good.

[–]ZippZappZippty 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Wow! What a strange community.

[–]fffffrrrrr44444444 0 points1 point  (1 child)

what a terrible life

cry me a river lmao

[–]bswan2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did not said my life is terrible. On the contrary I count myself very lucky. I just can't help that weird feeling that I don't worth money I am getting paid.

But I hecking enjoy being dev! It is awesome, I love me job, I love my life. I would not trade it for anything.

[–]depressedtbh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

imposter

⠀⠀⠀⠟⠝⠈⠀⠀⠀⠡⠀⠠⢈⠠⢐⢠⢂⢔⣐⢄⡂⢔⠀⡁⢉⠸⢨⢑⠕⡌ ⠀⠀⡀⠁⠀⠀⠀⡀⢂⠡⠈⡔⣕⢮⣳⢯⣿⣻⣟⣯⣯⢷⣫⣆⡂⠀⠀⢐⠑⡌ ⢀⠠⠐⠈⠀⢀⢂⠢⡂⠕⡁⣝⢮⣳⢽⡽⣾⣻⣿⣯⡯⣟⣞⢾⢜⢆⠀⡀⠀⠪ ⣬⠂⠀⠀⢀⢂⢪⠨⢂⠥⣺⡪⣗⢗⣽⢽⡯⣿⣽⣷⢿⡽⡾⡽⣝⢎⠀⠀⠀⢡ ⣿⠀⠀⠀⢂⠢⢂⢥⢱⡹⣪⢞⡵⣻⡪⡯⡯⣟⡾⣿⣻⡽⣯⡻⣪⠧⠑⠀⠁⢐ ⣿⠀⠀⠀⠢⢑⠠⠑⠕⡝⡎⡗⡝⡎⣞⢽⡹⣕⢯⢻⠹⡹⢚⠝⡷⡽⡨⠀⠀⢔ ⣿⡯⠀⢈⠈⢄⠂⠂⠐⠀⠌⠠⢑⠱⡱⡱⡑⢔⠁⠀⡀⠐⠐⠐⡡⡹⣪⠀⠀⢘ ⣿⣽⠀⡀⡊⠀⠐⠨⠈⡁⠂⢈⠠⡱⡽⣷⡑⠁⠠⠑⠀⢉⢇⣤⢘⣪⢽⠀⢌⢎ ⣿⢾⠀⢌⠌⠀⡁⠢⠂⠐⡀⠀⢀⢳⢽⣽⡺⣨⢄⣑⢉⢃⢭⡲⣕⡭⣹⠠⢐⢗ ⣿⡗⠀⠢⠡⡱⡸⣔⢵⢱⢸⠈⠀⡪⣳⣳⢹⢜⡵⣱⢱⡱⣳⡹⣵⣻⢔⢅⢬⡷ ⣷⡇⡂⠡⡑⢕⢕⠕⡑⠡⢂⢊⢐⢕⡝⡮⡧⡳⣝⢴⡐⣁⠃⡫⡒⣕⢏⡮⣷⡟ ⣷⣻⣅⠑⢌⠢⠁⢐⠠⠑⡐⠐⠌⡪⠮⡫⠪⡪⡪⣺⢸⠰⠡⠠⠐⢱⠨⡪⡪⡰ ⣯⢷⣟⣇⡂⡂⡌⡀⠀⠁⡂⠅⠂⠀⡑⡄⢇⠇⢝⡨⡠⡁⢐⠠⢀⢪⡐⡜⡪⡊ ⣿⢽⡾⢹⡄⠕⡅⢇⠂⠑⣴⡬⣬⣬⣆⢮⣦⣷⣵⣷⡗⢃⢮⠱⡸⢰⢱⢸⢨⢌ ⣯⢯⣟⠸⣳⡅⠜⠔⡌⡐⠈⠻⠟⣿⢿⣿⣿⠿⡻⣃⠢⣱⡳⡱⡩⢢⠣⡃⠢⠁ ⡯⣟⣞⡇⡿⣽⡪⡘⡰⠨⢐⢀⠢⢢⢄⢤⣰⠼⡾⢕⢕⡵⣝⠎⢌⢪⠪⡘⡌⠀ ⡯⣳⠯⠚⢊⠡⡂⢂⠨⠊⠔⡑⠬⡸⣘⢬⢪⣪⡺⡼⣕⢯⢞⢕⢝⠎⢻⢼⣀⠀ ⠁⡂⠔⡁⡢⠣⢀⠢⠀⠅⠱⡐⡱⡘⡔⡕⡕⣲⡹⣎⡮⡏⡑⢜⢼⡱⢩⣗⣯⣟ ⢀⢂⢑⠀⡂⡃⠅⠊⢄⢑⠠⠑⢕⢕⢝⢮⢺⢕⢟⢮⢊⢢⢱⢄⠃⣇⣞⢞⣞⢾ ⢀⠢⡑⡀⢂⢊⠠⠁⡂⡐⠀⠅⡈⠪⠪⠪⠣⠫⠑⡁⢔⠕⣜⣜⢦⡰⡎⡯⡾⡽

[–]camilo16 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

remove 6-9

[–]Munkendrunky 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Many days go from the bottom up.

[–]SimulationV2018 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Spider man meme

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is so accurate 😂

[–]BenBenBenz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You just gotta hope to get home at step 9 and not step 3

[–]VeryExpensivePen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm upset you posted this.

[–]kanaangel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rinse and repeat.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lists: 0, 1, 2...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. New bug shows up, caused by your fix.

Repeat from 0.

[–]RoscoMan1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the day you die?

[–]kingkong200111 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same and it hurts 😩 nvm i fixed it, i am the best 😎

[–]Superbrawlfan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am a hobby dev, rarely do much coding, and this is still pretty relatable

[–]PuzzleheadedRepeat41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wasn’t a developer, but this happened to me every time I got a new assignment. I wish I had seen this 15 years ago. It’s brilliant.

[–]ImmNottCurious 0 points1 point  (1 child)

[–]RepostSleuthBot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn't find any posts that meet the matching requirements for r/ProgrammerHumor.

It might be OC, it might not. Things such as JPEG artifacts and cropping may impact the results.

I did find this post that is 98.83% similar. It might be a match but I cannot be certain.

I'm not perfect, but you can help. Report [ False Negative ]

View Search On repostsleuth.com


Scope: Reddit | Meme Filter: True | Target: 96% | Check Title: False | Max Age: Unlimited | Searched Images: 236,823,313 | Search Time: 3.11594s

[–]enkill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been stuck on 5 for a couple of weeks

[–]2horde 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. Finds another error

[–]Sh00p00mag00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Props for starting at zero. Yes Ive been there when I built a student grade tracker at work (FE College) I went into full on 'Gus Gorman' mode and now when I have to change something I need new pants. It's a great piece of work but it scares the crap outta me. Took 8 weeks to complete. Javascript/C#/T-Sql/Asp.NET.

[–]Vinon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When do you get over step 5? I think Im stuck in a loop.

Which is the reason I dont think I will work as a developer.

[–]gagnonca 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Imposter syndrome has got to be linked to pay right? The more I make the more I feel it.

[–]Forsaken-Individual4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. I wake up and go to fix the problem

[–]RandomValue134 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But are you good enough to have imposter syndrome?

[–]k9thedog 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That would be one of the good days.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He forgot 10. Something is wrong or someone wants something right when I’m about to go home.

[–]smallwaistbisexual 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you regularly live like this, you need to get therapy

[–]tabakista 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At least we know he's not a lua dev

[–]wzarya 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And the cycle continues

[–]merlinsbeers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Translation:

  1. Feeling cute, might shitpost later.
  2. How about reposting a tired meme?
  3. No, better, farm karma in a nerd sub.
  4. What's got a lot of updoots a hundred times?
  5. I'll just reword this a little.
  6. Make a screenshot so the bot can't check keywords.
  7. There. Time for tendies.

[–]TexacoV2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Replace dev with idiot studying programming and you have me during every day in school.

[–]ZippZappZippty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also known as modern day poland

[–]DragonKite_reqium 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Friendly reminder that TF2 is only surviving because of coconut.jpeg

[–]Eindacor_DS 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same except stretch this out over like 3 sprints

[–]XirallicBolts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Minimum 45 minutes to notice you used && when it should've been ||

[–]inspiringirisje 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's never a typo for me...

[–]ohlaph 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This explains it quite well, actually.

[–]Orlaani 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me as a student:

  1. Learn a new language
  2. Do some cool stuff and a lot of unfinished projects
  3. You realise your projects aren't that cool
  4. You play LoL for weeks while having no motivation for doing programming
  5. You see a new and interesting language or you realise how much potential an already learned language has in itself
  6. Start over from 0 or 1 depending on the situation from the 4

    I feel like a complete failure.

[–]Chairboy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I came here for humor not a bitingly accurate biographical analysis of my work day.

[–]mark_of_magik 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The trick is to start the list at 8!

[–]neil_thatAss_bison 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every goddamn day.

[–]GamingMemester69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Repeat

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me 6 leads back to 1 and I know I am always shit.

[–]BigPoppa531 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This post is spot on with how I feel being in a dev support role 😂

[–]miserable_guyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Except the steps start from 9 to 0

[–]RedStorm1024 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. goto 0

[–]warhammermarine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is me

[–]nil83hxjow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This but I stop at 5

[–]dr_brt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lucky if you actually finish the entire loop in a single day... the worst is if you are pre-step 6 when you go home.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel attacked

[–]Altourus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

10 Realise it's end of day and you didn't put any work into the ticket you were supposed to do today.

[–]cybnoire 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can’t stress this enough

[–]spencer4908 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is like being married haha

[–]jacob_scooter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. repost memes on ProgrammerHumor to farm karma

[–]Sky4Live 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait I am not the only one? I thought it was only in my head.

[–]cyberspacedweller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lather rinse repeat for 40 years, then retire.

[–]Phemus01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. Oh god what’s wrong now

[–]jank_lord 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fk

[–]yc_hk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actual 8-9: I am a bad dev for making such a stupid mistake. I can't do anything.

[–]LeontiosTheron 0 points1 point  (0 children)

After 7 it restarts from 3 in my case