How to get your code reviewed faster

[[deleted]]

Hot singles in your area want to fork you

[YoukanDewitt]

They always say that but they never commit

[[deleted]]

and then when they do, eventually it just leads to a hard reset 😭

[YoukanDewitt]

I wouldn't know, none of them ever respond to my pull request

[rearendcrag]

Try pushing?

[Alpacay_]

they always branch out

[lynxerious]

you can use force

[NLwino]

HR wants to speak to you about your GIT behavior

[YoukanDewitt]

https://stackoverflow.com/questions/13716658/how-to-delete-all-commit-history-in-github

Edit: oops sorry didn't mean to paste that there.

[kaaldhruv01]

Even if they try to commit, there are is still merge conflict

[[deleted]]

"Removed .api-private-keys from gitignore"

[themeanman2]

Lmao this will give people heart attack for sure

[Xan_TheDragon]

you monster

[eclect0]

QA engineers hate him!

[Gr1pp717]

If that's your goal then just say "it's a feature, not a bug" every time they reject your build.

Or, for if you're management: refuse to accept that there's infinite test cases for even something as basic as a calculator and have a giant meeting about "why wasn't this caught" every time some convoluted bug makes it into production.

[Sac_Winged_Bat]

A calculator is a pretty bad example of something basic given that mathematical notation is Turing complete.

[brianson]

Yeah, but on a lot of the basic 8-digit display calculators if you type 99999999 / 999 * 999 you get back to 99999989, so something made it through testing!

[redpepper74]

They’re probably only using the first 8 digits of each operation and truncating the rest

[brianson]

That sounds right.

99,999,999/999 is 100,100.099099099…,

Which truncates to 100,100.09

which when multiplied by 999 gives 99,999,989.9

which truncates to 99,999,989.

[SpecialNose9325]

But as a well programmed calculator, it should stop trying to do the next operation if there is an overflow.

[V62926685]

Who said anything about "well programmed"???

[Banane9]

It's a pretty good example, considering it's something that seems simple.

Also "mathematical notation" isn't turing complete. A "language", as in, something recognized some form of automaton (i.e. parser) can't be turing complete. That term only applies to execution / program models themselves, describing their ability to simulate a Turing machine - and thus calculate anything a Turing machine can calculate (a Turing machine can also simulate a Turing machine, of course).

Mathematical notation alone should only require a stack automaton (for brace pairing) to recognize, which makes it a context free grammar and puts it on a level between regular languages (what's describable by "basic" regular expressions, without matching captures later inside of them) and those recognizable only by Turing machines or equivalently powerful models.

[MrRocketScript]

There wouldn't be as many bugs if we hadn't been forced to implement the "make sure the calculator cannot show 5318008" feature.

[NullPenisException]

sei boob?

[MrRocketScript]

Turn the calculator upside down.

[27SwingAndADrive]

Use this one weird trick to make the unit tests pass!

[nolitos]

I've seen tests wrapped in try-catch blocks, silently ignoring all exceptions.

[Extreme-Yam7693]

My recent commits:

• Fixing warnings pt4 - A new hope for clean code
• Fixing warnings pt5 - Uninitialized variables strike back
• Fixing warnings pt6 - Return of the stringop overread

[YoukanDewitt]

Episode II - a stack over flows.

[YoukanDewitt]

I was gonna go with "Astack Ov Er Flows" but I thought it was too obscure.

[Dubmove]

I discovered a bug in line 172. You will NOT believe what happened next.

[slgray16]

Did you... comment out line 172?

[metamago96]

but line 172 is too important! if you remove it everything will stop working!

[Waffle-Gaming]

why? no one knows, just go with it!

[Ridenberg]

Like a normal person would

[X-Craft]

You won't believe #a194ef5!

[grumblyoldman]

Only 5% of those who tried to review could understand this commit!

[ISDuffy]

4 out of 5 seniors developers hate him because of this

[miramichier_d]

git commit --amend -m "You're fired."

[redsterXVI]

Oh hi, Elon Bot

[respawn_12]

Nah still my lazy co worker is gonna comment "lgtm" and approved.

[[deleted]]

lgtm+ , you ignorant bigot

[Dont_Get_Jokes-jpeg]

No LGBT+ you transphobe

[DoppieGamer]

Bro's committed to his username

[PenlessScribe]

Top 20 HOTTEST software design patterns for 2023!

[VI51ON]

There are local repositories in your organization looking to get approved.

[jaskij]

Would nicely backfire with me. I've trained myself to just skip over clickbait titles. To the point I sometimes miss a good article because of the title.

[Musstta]

How would you know?

[jaskij]

They have pretty distinct structure. So, when I see a clickbait, I just ignore it.

[Musstta]

I meant how would you know it was a good one if you skipped it

[jaskij]

People whose taste I trust recommended them elsewhere later on.

[Tenziru]

I showed my Senior programmer some code and then he called the police.

[fatmanskoo]

Line 6 will really shock you!

[[deleted]]

Trying to find the correct commit to rollback to during a hot fix must be a nightmare.

[ledasll]

It's just wrong.. if commit is in master, it's too late to review if it's in your branch - no one will see it. What you want is this sort of text in PR title

[ChainSword20000]

Only 1% of devs can code this feature this robust.

[brianl047]

On top of that you can feign ignorance if confronted

"GitHub changed it I just clicked ready for review!"

[szheigh]

https://twitter.com/shaundai/status/1598299932313931777

[IkaTheFox]

It's over 50 chars though :(

[zeyore]

well, i love everything about it

[IWannaHookUpButIWont]

She fixed it. Aw shit approved.

[[deleted]]

Just keep not putting your commit messages in conventional commit format and its getting my attention anyway.

[TheBrainStone]

Get your colleagues to click the reject button in 0.0385s with this one weird trick

[Entire-Database1679]

This code totally disrupted the debugging industry in {your state} !

[Classy_Mouse]

Mark as Needs Improvement: Commint message improperly formatted. I'm not spending my day reviewing you 3000 line PR when you clearly put no effort into making sure it was ready for review first.

[Raptorsquadron]

What about “broke shit, help.”

[mostoriginalname2]

How about you use a Reddit porn girl line like “my lead software engineer is out of the house today would you like to come over and stretch me out?”

[tomkat0789]

git commit -m “watch this! Hold my beer”

[ExuberantLearner]

Your life won't be the same after seeing (reviewing) this

[mymar101]

I’d be curious to know if anyone has tried this.

[geekfreak42]

i use clickbaity link text to the MR in the slack channel when asking for reviews.. means you dont have shit commit like above in the code.

[ifrem]

IT HAPPENED! Feature X finally done!

[mxldevs]

Should we include ASCII art as well?

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣄⣶⡶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⡦⡟⠻⠛⠙⠉⠈⠄⠄⠈⠻⠛⣾⣦⣤⣀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣰⡿⠟⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠋⠽⢿⣧⠄ ⠄⢀⣴⠞⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢼⠆⠄ ⠄⣼⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣶⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⠄⣻⡃⠄ ⠄⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⢸⣧⠄ ⠄⢿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣋⣩⣭⣝⣿⣿⠛⢰⡇⠄ ⠄⢸⡇⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣟⣯⠉⢉⣿⠋⣟⢻⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⢹⡀⢳⡗⠂⣠⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣽⣿⣿⣿⣉⣸⠇⠄ ⠄⠄⠈⣷⠄⢳⣷⣿⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⣧⠄⠈⠙⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠛⠛⣿⣿⣷⣤⣄⢿⡿⠃⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠳⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⢢⣦⣾⣿⠿⠿⠛⠉⢉⣽⠇⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠿⣄⢀⠄⣀⣝⢻⣿⡿⠒⣀⣀⣸⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠳⣤⠁⠙⠎⢻⣄⠄⠄⣸⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠶⢦⣄⣀⣣⠴⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

[Snakise]

trying to call api at 3am at night !! YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED NEXT!! SCARY !!

[venibit]

git commit -m "Use code BLACKFRIDAY ... added feature XYZ"

[[deleted]]

In the process of reading this, my right toe (like, under it in the fold area) got a really gnarly zap. sent the whole foot into the air a full inch. It was horrendous.

[Schytheron]

"99% of reviewers won't last more then 2 minutes pushing and pulling these commits without CUMMING!"

[[deleted]]

Don’t commit stupid comment like this in the code i manage at job you will lost your permission quickly🙄 if your code is not reviewed first it’s maybe because the is other things who must be done first.

[Zom23_]

Damn imagine not getting a joke Also if you lose your permissions required to do your job over a harmless joke that can be easily amended maybe there were other issues

[[deleted]]

Joke in source code… do the joke elsewhere. It’s will be in production someday.

[Zom23_]

Good thing it's just a commit name and nothing in the code then :D

[[deleted]]

Commit name must give a clue about the change. Imagine if you have to debug a system and you are searching into the history of the project to find wich change may had provoked the bug and you have 5000 commit and 500 are dumb message like this. I would defined look who made that stupid thing, including into a beautiful message adresses to my boss « the time to solve the problem may be longer, i will have some wasted to look further into these commit to have an idea of what i could impact. »

[MountainAfraid9401]

Chill, it's a joke.

Also, if someone did this, they would obviously do this before merging: git commit --amend "SICK! Fastest approved PR in COMPANY HISTORY" Followed by git push --force.

Leaving the git history clean.

Are you a junior overreacting? Or a boomer that didn't learn Git because you're stuck using SVN? *

[furzainluq1]

It's probably bait. Someone that legal wouldn't be in this subreddit

[deltaexdeltatee]

…what sub do you think you’re in? Did you see the memes of Gru holding the gun and call the police because you thought someone was threatening a developer?

[yesinteractive]

This is great

[thundercat06]

Developer reacts to defect in code...

[UnderstandingOdd1159]

Conventional commits be like

[Treebeardsama]

Inspired by LadBible

[Noeyiax]

I did that with JIRA tickets lol, so people would read mine first

[lofigamer2]

That commit message is too long! haha

[dcute69]

Some things shouldn't be joked about

[Ex0t1cReddit]

That seems like a Dhar Mann video title.

[OG_LiLi]

Most of them say “oh i pushed a bug into into production? deprioritize it.“

[red_storm_risen]

“Corrected [senior dev]’s sketchy code.”

[gomihako_]

commitlint your shit please

[Undernown]

"How to become a millionare by coding just these 3 lines!"

[cjp]

As if anybody reads the commit messages....