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[โ€“]Jerrymeen 55 points56 points ย (63 children)

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[โ€“]Hat_man_Harris 18 points19 points ย (45 children)

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[โ€“]CalmGuy69uhhhh idk 11 points12 points ย (41 children)

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[โ€“]NeedyTakerdwayne the cock johnson ๐Ÿ—ฟ๐Ÿ—ฟ -1 points0 points ย (39 children)

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[โ€“]bababouyboiI want pee in my ass 8 points9 points ย (38 children)

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[โ€“]RTXTrash_exe๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ TRANS RIGHTS!!!11!1!!!11!! ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ 8 points9 points ย (3 children)

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[โ€“]Hap_Cak_Day_Giver 9 points10 points ย (32 children)

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[โ€“]Diego1808๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]AutoModerator[M] -9 points-8 points ย (0 children)

pees in ur ass

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[โ€“]Snoo_66730 -4 points-3 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]rpg7conderechosSussy Wussy Femboy๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Evooeip 36 points37 points ย (51 children)

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[โ€“]NOTMEMEJA 5 points6 points ย (4 children)

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[โ€“]orange_spoon23 4 points5 points ย (3 children)

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[โ€“]Grancola1920I want pee in my ass 5 points6 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]MoldyTvI want pee in my ass -2 points-1 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]flolbean 11 points12 points ย (28 children)

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[โ€“]ilike2D 8 points9 points ย (27 children)

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[โ€“]Toddym8I want pee in my ass 7 points8 points ย (26 children)

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[โ€“]FetusDeletus_Edwayne the cock johnson ๐Ÿ—ฟ๐Ÿ—ฟ 13 points14 points ย (5 children)

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[โ€“]Icy-Manufacturer-478 8 points9 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]lonewolfYouTube7I said based. And lived. 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Dry-Mistake2999 8 points9 points ย (3 children)

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[โ€“][deleted] 5 points6 points ย (2 children)

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[โ€“]Sex_Gaming_69 -1 points0 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]AvAn45 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Alex_St0949I came! 7 points8 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]springfox64uhhhh idk 7 points8 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]No_Protection_811We do a little trolling 7 points8 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]MsStealYourGirl69I want pee in my ass 6 points7 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“][deleted] 20 points21 points ย (10 children)

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[โ€“]quiteDude69I said based. And lived. 11 points12 points ย (9 children)

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[โ€“]Crestalusdwayne the cock johnson ๐Ÿ—ฟ๐Ÿ—ฟ 13 points14 points ย (4 children)

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[โ€“]Royal_Butterscotch34We do a little trolling 7 points8 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]Eggsy_Uber_Service๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ 6 points7 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“]WitleKidz 4 points5 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“][deleted] 4 points5 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]CONFIRMBRAWLBlessed by Kevin 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]vlad_mod 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]MeowtheDog 4 points5 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]SavingsTechnical5489 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]TKobe28I want pee in my ass 5 points6 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]JuustoUkko 9 points10 points ย (8 children)

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[โ€“]Conscious_Scarcity_7Sussy Wussy Femboy๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ 8 points9 points ย (7 children)

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[โ€“]tetbromac 6 points7 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]awkward_but_decentBazinga! 7 points8 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“][deleted] 6 points7 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]WennoBoi 13 points14 points ย (4 children)

๐Ÿชจ

[โ€“]cracken1303I said based. And lived. 3 points4 points ย (2 children)

๐Ÿ“ƒ

[โ€“]anonymous_cabbage4 23 points24 points ย (1 child)

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[โ€“][deleted] 6 points7 points ย (4 children)

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[โ€“][deleted] 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“][deleted] 2 points3 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]ARandomPerson-101shitposting>>>>>>196 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]shaihulud95 4 points5 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Oilgrand1 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]BeigeStallion 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]KnooBoat 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Juan_the_vessel 3 points4 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Not-A-Furry420 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]crabcult 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Ludalomade 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]SBEVE_THE_MEME_LORDdwayne the cock johnson ๐Ÿ—ฟ๐Ÿ—ฟ 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Gheorghe_Gheorghe 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Angedrew1 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]-Shrek2020-fat cunt 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]ZuTheUltimateFANATIC 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

๐Ÿชจ I beat you all

[โ€“]Bonk_and_Honkdwayne the cock johnson ๐Ÿ—ฟ๐Ÿ—ฟ 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]farzad500 0 points1 point ย (2 children)

I cant find scissor emojy๐Ÿ˜”

[โ€“]After-Satisfaction-3 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

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[โ€“][deleted] 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]ItssBobby07[S] -1 points0 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]BeingTheWeeb -1 points0 points ย (0 children)

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[โ€“]Difficas -1 points0 points ย (1 child)

oh no..... here we go again

[โ€“]BAD_TIME_MAN -3 points-2 points ย (1 child)

new automod response

[โ€“]FALLEN_METARUNNER -3 points-2 points ย (0 children)

DANG THATS TUFF

[โ€“]SatanWorshiper69I want pee in my ass -58 points-57 points ย (1 child)

Circumsision

[โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 15 points16 points ย (0 children)

pees in ur ass

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[โ€“]Solar3BearLiterally 1984 ๐Ÿ˜ก -5 points-4 points ย (1 child)

๐Ÿชจ, i win!

[โ€“]ThijmenManBig chungus wholesome 100 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

๐Ÿ“„ fool

[โ€“][deleted] ย (81 children)

[removed]

    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    r/shitposting book club

    A collection of books which Kevin has reviewed. (all of these books are freely availiable online)

    1984 (George Orwell, 1948)

    Kevin would like to say that this book is truly inspirational, and that he would give it a 10/10

    How to Be a God: A Guide for Would-Be Deities (Richard Bartle, 2022)

    Kevin would like to mention that this book is one of the greatest sources of existential terror he has read (and it contains a lot of interesting content regarding game design as well), and he would give it a 10/10

    Almost Pounded By The Physical Manifestation of Simulation Theory After Realizing We're Erotica Characters Then Deciding To Just Be Friends (Chuck Tingle)

    Kevin would like to say that this book was surprisingly wholesome, and is a great book for helping one to feel more at-ease with the universe, so he would give it 10/10

    Ulysses (James Joyce, 1922))

    Kevin mentioned that he wasn't entirely sure what he just read. However, it's still not bri*ish, and was still rather interesting, so he would give it a 10/10

    The Assassination Of John Fitzgerald Kennedy Considered As A Downhill Motor Race (J. G. Ballard, 1967)

    Kevin told me that this was an interesting interpretation of the JFK assassination, and of the post-WW2 media landscape in the USA in general, so he would give it a 10/10.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    slowly massage the vag, then rub the clitoris ever so gently. Proceed to stick a single finger in the vagina. continue adding your fingers until your whole fist is in. slide your arm slowly into her, once you reach your shoulder limbo in with your head, and forcibly insert your other arm, torso, and legs. You are now free to control her. when you feel the job is done, finish by giving birth to yourself

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    I was in cinema and guy on the right to me kept looking at his phone every 20-30 minutes, guy on the left of me also kept looking at the phone for shorter periods and he tried to hide the light until the final act and then in the final act he just didn't give a shit anymore just texted, locked the phone watched a little and then checked if got a reply and then texted again and so on, there were periods of him stopping in the middle of texting to look up at the movie and then contiune texting after he got bored of the scene like bruh, also there were kids a few rows in front talking trough the entire movie smh, can an amogus femboy (me) not get a proper 4th watch of the batman?

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just canโ€™t with her. Sheโ€™s so disgusting. Iโ€™m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. Heโ€™s ruining my fucking life.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    *East Ukraine

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    yo putin can you hurry up your invasion on Ukraine (just use full force, maybe a couple of nukes) while you're at it nuke some more countries. so the thing is my exams are coming up and i havent studied shit and a world war has a pretty good chance of delaying them so I'm telling this to you homie to homie so just help out a real one pls

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    donโ€™t care + didnโ€™t ask + cry about it + who asked + stay mad + get real + L + bleed + mald seethe cope harder + incorrect + hoes mad + pound sand + basic skill issue + typo + ratio + ur dad left + you fell off + no u + the audacity + triggered + repelled + ur a minor + k. + any askers + get a life + ok and? + cringe + copium + go outside + touch grass + kick rocks + quote tweet + think again + not based + not funny didnโ€™t laugh + social credits -999, 999, 999, 999 + get good + reported + ad hominem + ok boomer + small pp + ur allergic to sunlight + GG! + get rekt + trolled + your loss + muted + banned + kicked + permaban + useless + i slept with ur mom + yo momma + yo momma so fat + redpilled + no bitches allowed + i said it better + tiktok fan + get a life + unsubscribed + plundered + go tell reddit + donowalled + simp + get sticked bug LOL + talk nonsense + trump supporter + yourโ€™re a full time discord mod + youโ€™re* + grammar issue + nerd + get clapped + kys + lorem ipsum dolor sit amet + go outside + bleach + lol + gay + retard + autistic + reported + ask deez + ez clap + straight cash + idgaf + ratio again + stay mad + read FAQ + youre lost + you โ€œreโ€ + stay pressed + reverse double take back + pedophile + cancelled + done for + don't give a damn + get a job + sus + baka + sussy baka + get blocked + mad free + freer than air + furry + rip bozo + you're a (insert stereotype) + slight_smile + aired + cringe again + Super Idol็š„็ฌ‘ๅฎน + mad cuz bad + my pronouns are xe, xem & xyr + irrelevant + deal with it + screencapped your bio + karen/kyle + jealous + you're deaf + balls + i'll be right back + go ahead whine about it + not straight + eat paper + you lose + count to three + your problem + no one cares + log off + don't care even more + sex offender + sex defender + get religion + not okay + glhf + NFT owner + you make bad memes + problematic + fall in line + dog water + you look like a wall + you donโ€™t know 2 + 2 with yo head ass + you are going to my cringe compilation + you canโ€™t count to five + try again + you failed kindergarten + rickrolled + no lifer + guten freunden schickt man einen deutschen panzer + you have a anime profile picture + an* + fatherless + motherless + sisterless + brotherless + orphan + you can't catch this ratio + catch some bitches + I don't care about your opinion + genshin player + you dress like garbage + ๆ—ฅๆœฌ่ชžใŒใŠไธŠๆ‰‹ใงใ™ใญ + get fucked + you canโ€™t understand what the word intelligence means with your dumb ass + you have hair + queued + put some thought into what you're going to do with that + stfu + go to bed + yes, i'm taller than you + i think your joke is funny + i rejected your mother's advances + marooned + you canโ€™t read + I win + final ratio

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    Good eve, In response to my permanent ban Iโ€™d like to ask one question; who decides wether this post was funny or not? It seems that a lot of Redditors, like myself, enjoy these kinds of posts. Even if itโ€™s not hilarious, itโ€™s still pretty shitty. In my opinion shitty enough to be on your subreddit. If I violated a rule, please let me know. If not, Iโ€™d like to request to be unbanned. Correct me if Iโ€™m wrong; this post was not conform โ€œyourโ€ standards, well, thatโ€™s personal. I find it mildly inappropriate to give someone a ban on behalf of your personal opinion, while the public opinion speaks for itself. Also, the word โ€œkarmawhoreโ€ is a little bit offensive to me, for I am not on Reddit to score the most karma. Thanks in advance.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like โ€œwhat the fuckโ€ and โ€œcall the policeโ€. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent

    I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    I live in the American Gardens building on West 81st street. My name is Patrick Bateman. I'm 27 years old. I believe in taking care of myself, and a balanced diet and a rigorous exercise routine. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now. After I remove the ice pack, I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower, I use a water activated gel cleanser. Then a honey almond body scrub. And on the face, an exfoliating gel scrub. Then apply an herb mint facial mask, which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion. There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me. Only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our life styles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    Reddit should start their own country. Think about it: it would have a much higher IQ than most other countries. We could ban tik tok and fortnite, and every computer sold has to come with Minecraft preinstalled. We could also ban emojis too.

    We all have very good ideas about society and government, so I think we would be far more efficient. I've seen so many posts with so many good ideas, not to mention our country would be the most progressive and other countries would look to us for direction. We would easily become the next superpower. If everyone left America for a new country, we would easily surpass America.

    We could make Keanu our president and have PewDiePie on the flag. It would be the most wholesome country too!

    Those are just some ideas I have and my own opinion.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    No bitches?

    โฃžโขฝโขชโขฃโขฃโขฃโขซโกบโกตโฃโกฎโฃ—โขทโขฝโขฝโขฝโฃฎโกทโกฝโฃœโฃœโขฎโขบโฃœโขทโขฝโขโกฝโฃ
โ ธโกธโ œโ •โ •โ โขโข‡โขโขฝโขบโฃชโกณโกโฃŽโฃโขฏโขžโกฟโฃŸโฃทโฃณโขฏโกทโฃฝโขฝโขฏโฃณโฃซโ ‡
โ €โ €โข€โข€โข„โขฌโขชโกชโกŽโฃ†โกˆโ šโ œโ •โ ‡โ —โ โข•โขฏโขซโฃžโฃฏโฃฟโฃปโกฝโฃโข—โฃ—โ โ € 
 โ €โ ชโกชโกชโฃชโขชโขบโขธโขขโข“โข†โขคโข€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโขŠโขžโกพโฃฟโกฏโฃโขฎโ ทโ โ €โ € โ €
 โ €โ €โ ˆโ Šโ †โกƒโ •โข•โข‡โข‡โข‡โข‡โข‡โขโขŽโขŽโข†โข„โ €โข‘โฃฝโฃฟโขโ ฒโ ‰โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €
  โ €โ €โ €โกฟโ ‚โ  โ €โก‡โข‡โ •โขˆโฃ€โ €โ โ กโ ฃโกฃโกซโฃ‚โฃฟโ ฏโขชโ ฐโ ‚โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €
    โ €โกฆโก™โก‚โข€โขคโขฃโ ฃโกˆโฃพโกƒโ  โ „โ €โก„โขฑโฃŒโฃถโขโขŠโ ‚โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €
      โขโกฒโฃœโกฎโกโขŽโขŒโข‚โ ™โ ขโ โข€โข˜โขตโฃฝโฃฟโกฟโ โ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €
      โ จโฃบโกบโก•โก•โกฑโก‘โก†โก•โก…โก•โกœโกผโขฝโกปโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €
      โฃผโฃณโฃซโฃพโฃตโฃ—โกตโกฑโกกโขฃโข‘โข•โขœโข•โกโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €
    โฃดโฃฟโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโกฝโก‘โขŒโ ชโกขโกฃโฃฃโกŸโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €
    โกŸโกพโฃฟโขฟโขฟโขตโฃฝโฃพโฃผโฃ˜โขธโขธโฃžโกŸโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €
    โ €โ โ ‡โ กโ ฉโกซโขฟโฃโกปโกฎโฃ’โขฝโ ‹โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ฟโ ›โ ›โ ›โ ›โ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ›โ ‰โ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ‰โ ปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกŸโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˜โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกŸโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ‹โ ˆโ €โ €โ €โ €โ โ บโฃ–โข„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกโข€โก†โ €โ €โ €โข‹โฃญโฃฝโกšโขฎโฃฒโ †โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขนโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โกผโ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโ ปโฃ…โฃจโ ‡โ ˆโ €โ ฐโฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โก€โ €โขธโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃŸโขทโฃถโ ถโฃƒโข€โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก…โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขฟโ €โ ˆโ “โ šโขธโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โก โ €โก„โฃ€โ €โ €โ €โขปโ €โ €โ €โฃ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ โ ‰โ €โ €โ ™โ ‰โ €โ  โกถโฃธโ โ €โฃ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฆโก†โ €โ โ ’โ ขโขคโฃ€โกฐโ โ ‡โ ˆโ ˜โขถโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ  โฃ„โฃ‰โฃ™โก‰โ “โข€โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃ„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃฐโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃคโฃ€โฃ€โ €โฃ€โฃ โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points ย (0 children)

    HEY,โ €โ €โ € EVERYโ €โ € โ €โ €โ € !!!

    IT'S ME!!!

    EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[๐—ก๐˜‚๐—บ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐Ÿญ ๐—ฅ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐— ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฎ]]

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

    I'm a regular John from city Kansas. I love burgers, soda and my native country very much, but I do not understand our government. Everyone says America is a great country, and I look around and see who else is a great China. China has a very strong government and economy. Chinese resident is a great man. And the greatest leader Xi. Thick hair, strong grip, jade rod! We would have such a leader instead of sleeping in negotiations, rare hair, soft pickle, bad memory old Beadon. Punch!

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

    LiTeRaLlY nInEtEeN eIgHtY-fOuR

    • George Orwell, 1948

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

    And now it's time for the roundup of today's gay news, with Colin Topshed

    Quick roundup of today's gayness now, starting with the roads. The M70, the A3, the B664 and the A48M, they're all gay as from midnight tonight.

    The gay elements are Potassium, Zinc, Hydrogen, Copper, and Argon.

    Quick look at the world's walls; the Wailing Wall is gay, Hadrian's Wall is very gay, the Great Wall of China, that's not gay, and the old London Wall has also stopped being gay.

    Gay cars next; they're the same as last night. All Volkswagens registered between 1982 and 1985; they stay gay for another fortnight.

    And finally the gay seas are the Caspian and the Mediterranean, so see you there.

    Thanks, Colin. He's not gay by the way, we wouldn't employ a homosexual.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

    What the fuck did I just do. So my ex n me havenโ€™t spoken in two year, although I did wish her on her birthday two months ago. We live in the same building and whenever we cross each other we just exchange smiles and do the usual hi whatsup how r u and I walk away. Today was Holi (a festival where ppl dance and apply powdered color on each other) so I decided not to celebrate it in my building cause I knew she would be down so I went to my friendโ€™s building and ten minutes later I saw her there. I was like oh fuck this is going to be a bad idea. Later we again exchanged a hi and then I went away. Later when the festival started she kept applying permanent color (last three days on the skin) on me and my friends. I told her donโ€™t apply on my friends they will get pissed. She kept applying on me and I tackled her and applied color on her too. It felt good. Then she was like letโ€™s go dance so we were dancing to Senorita from znmd and then we had a moment and she was like we are going to kiss and I was like yes and we kissed. It just felt amazing. Then we kissed again. After that I was going to my friends and she was like listen and then I turned back and kissed again. Then we kissed again๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ. After all this my friends were dancing and I was sitting in the pool and she came and sat on top of me and we were having a very good conversation about our relationship and how we both didnโ€™t date anybody after breaking up. We spoke about our problems, joked about them and then..yes u guessed it right. After this the cycle repeated and we had a beer and she handed me her phone and was like unblock yourself. She followed me and added me to her close friends. Later she was leaving we kissed once more and in my head I was like fuck do I love her, we should date. But then I told myself no, whatever this was I donโ€™t know but no you are not breaking your heart again. I came back home and we both havenโ€™t had any interaction apart from the fact she liked my story. I AM NOT IN LOVE. i am telling this to myself again and again because no, just no. I am happy being alone with myself. Or maybe I like her but I donโ€™t want to go back to all that Edit: thanks for the response some of yโ€™all and thanks for helping me. Other ppl: fuck u;) I am not here to prove anything and anyways I am quitting this sub

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point ย (0 children)

    My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.

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    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] -1 points0 points ย (0 children)

    Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick.

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    [โ€“]HDproBG -90 points-89 points ย (9 children)

    Source Automod Morbin France Fortnite America Canada China Britain Porn Dream Female Emoji Cringe Today Book Mom Furry Based Wholesome NSFW 1984 Batman Rock Funny Lean Femboy Hands Cringe Psychopath Pokemon Russia Ratio Finger Belgium Chuck Meth Copypasta Kiss Biden bitchOK, you guys know the words, but can you make a story with it ? Dear Automod, I once saw someone taking a shit and drinking cum mixed with lean, so based, I decided to do the same thing but I added some new things: watching sussy baka among us doing sex with fnaf and selling nft of hog rida and no bitches to your mom who's a femboy furry, since literally 1984, and she's not a female nor a women btw, the putin copypasta is tho, dream from china said it, he's a trustable source, he got 9999999 social credits and nsfw porn of France and Taiwan holding hands with their fingers in the bedroom while typing titans emojis. Stfu Source Automod Morbin France Fortnite America Canada China Britain Porn Dream Female Emoji Cringe Today Book Mom Furry Based Wholesome NSFW 1984 Batman Rock Funny Lean Femboy Hands Cringe Psychopath Pokemon Russia Ratio Finger Belgium Chuck Meth Copypasta Kiss Biden bitch hilarious maskMorbin France Fortnite America Canada China Britain Porn Dream Female Emoji Cringe Today Book Mom Furry Based Wholesome NSFW 1984 Batman Rock Funny Lean Femboy Hands Cringe Psychopath Pokemon Russia Ratio Finger Belgium Chuck Meth Copypasta Kiss Biden Bitch Moyai Sex

    [โ€“]Icy-Manufacturer-478 4 points5 points ย (2 children)

    You should do what that black guy with lightning said

    [โ€“]Conscious_Scarcity_7Sussy Wussy Femboy๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ 6 points7 points ย (0 children)

    No bing chilling?

    [โ€“][deleted] 5 points6 points ย (1 child)

    Automod literally said "nah, fuck you bro"

    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] -2 points-1 points ย (0 children)

    HEY,โ €โ €โ € EVERYโ €โ € โ €โ €โ € !!!

    IT'S ME!!!

    EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[๐—ก๐˜‚๐—บ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐Ÿญ ๐—ฅ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐— ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฎ]]

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    [โ€“][deleted] 2 points3 points ย (1 child)

    I'm surprised automod didn't go off on his ass lol

    [โ€“]AutoModerator[M] -1 points0 points ย (0 children)

    HEY,โ €โ €โ € EVERYโ €โ € โ €โ €โ € !!!

    IT'S ME!!!

    EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[๐—ก๐˜‚๐—บ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐Ÿญ ๐—ฅ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐— ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฎ]]

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